[MBTI General] I fancy an INTJ.... Help!

[lauranna]

I fancy an INTJ. What's wrong with me?!!! Clearly we are totally incompatible. Shes intellectual and geeky and sophisticated and plans everything to within an inch of it's life. I do what I want when I want and still eat with my hands.
Could this ever work? I fear I may end up wanting to kill her and she will definitely want to kill me! X

 

[Thalassa]

I do what I want when I want and still eat with my hands.

Hey, me too!

I think it really depends on the two people. I've met INTJs who seem very balanced and in touch with their feelings somewhat, and others who seem cold, shut down and paranoid.

So it really depends on the two of you as individuals.

From a functional perspective you share Ni and Se, and from a dichotomy perspective at least you share IxTx.

Good luck!

 

[lauranna]

Haha yeah she is very balanced and in touch with her feelings which is good. I'm not sure how communication would work if neither of us like talking about feelings and shit. I can't really fathom why I'm attracted to her but mostly I can't see why she wants to be with me. I think she just wants a bit of rough and ready, a bit of adventure. But I'm not sure logically where she sees it going.

 

[Rex]

Could it work?

absolutelly.
ex:

My girlfriend is a ISTP

Works fine.

But yea.. feelings are usually a topic when we discuss other people.

 

[lauranna]

Thanks for the input Mats! What was it that attracted you to her and what do you like most about her/ what irritates you the most?

 

[uncommonentity]

I think it depends grossly on her tolerance for characteristic traits that you, yourself display. Although I myself am a male INTJ I've had a lot of interaction with female ones in my day and have found that once they like something they like it long time and have already done all the pro/con lists in their head surrounding the subject itself. It also depends on what you expect out of a relationship with her and whatnot in regards to it 'working'. I've no prior experience with what might of been an ISTP I've heard of the relation between the two types descibred as 'suitemate' which is defined as a person one might be comfortable sharing an office. Prefer similar climates, but don't necessarily have much in common as far as goals or world view. So maybe you should get in there for a hookup or twelve, have your fun and try not to get burnt.

 

[lauranna]

Yeah well I think one way another she has done the pros and cons and decided I'm what she wants and she wants to leave her current partner (who is similar to her) and be with me. We have been good friends for four years hence why I dont want her to make this move if it's going to f**k up. Whereas normally I wouldn't care about the consequences of my actions so much- I actually love her as a friend and don't want to hurt her.

 

[fripping]

have sex with her and then kill her. lessons learned the hard way.

 

[lauranna]

have sex with her and then kill her. lessons learned the hard way.

Hahaha its an option

 

[Rex]

I found her on a dating page. I used spotify heavily because i believe music tells something about you..
All the extro feelers had slow songs with lyrics that had a meaning. While she was oblivious to the lyrics (for some time that actually scared me a bit) and she also stated she scored ISTP as i had mentioned MBTI briefly. And i did some "impossible" conclusions and concluded that THIS girl will be a match.
and despite 2hours of sleep everything went fine on the date.

I had at the time concluded that i was not ready for a feeler/they are not ready for me. A thinker is my thing. And due to privious experience with ESTPs i decided that ISTP is more my thing. Was she as i expected? No.. much softer, sweeter and more gentle than i expected. But she is still more hardcore than i am. hard to explain.

Thanks for the input Mats! What was it that attracted you to her and what do you like most about her/ what irritates you the most?

Pros:
Logic and rationale rules.
Never ever a conflict.
She is open minded and tolerant
Likes speed and excitement
Loves to learn stuff and hear facts and so on.
Impossible to scare. (on our first date she saw my "im thinking and it looks like i am making a evil plan" (according to her) and she just found me interesting. That and that i was funny.


Cons:
won`t do it again if she feels that she is not good at it. (OT:I have given her a few tips in pool and she is now owning me. She says she don`t need to think about the tips she just adjust it seems)
Not much of a discussion partner. Shes like: "okay... i know you will figure out the right solution anyway"

 

[lauranna]

Hey Mats,
yeah i get your points. My main concern is this deep philosophical discussion thing which i'm just not up for. But maybe she can find someone else to have these convos with. I also worry that she might be a bit tame sexually... but i guess that is just for me to corrupt if she is.
Its funny you say your girlfriend was much softer sweeter and gentler than expected.... thats what the girl said about me too! (But i try and keep this quiet- i don't want to ruin my badass reputation!)
Ugh i don't know what to do with this. It seems like she has made her decision that its me she wants. And i'm sure as an INTJ she has spent hours weighing up the pros and cons. I just don't want her to get what she wanted and then think- "shit what am I doing with an ISTP. most of the time she is really boring and lazy and quiet. Where is the action girl i fell for?"

 

[amerellis]

have sex with her and then kill her. lessons learned the hard way.

why would you joke like that?

reminds me of this: http://www.typologycentral.com/foru...s/50423-i-don-t-want-live-planet-anymore.html

 

[A window to the soul]

I fancy an INTJ. What's wrong with me?!!! Clearly we are totally incompatible. Shes intellectual and geeky and sophisticated and plans everything to within an inch of it's life. I do what I want when I want and still eat with my hands. Could this ever work?

Do you enjoy spending time by yourself?

she will definitely want to kill me! X

Definitely. If the worry doesn't kill you first.

 

[fripping]

why would you joke like that?

reminds me of this: http://www.typologycentral.com/foru...s/50423-i-don-t-want-live-planet-anymore.html

well, it was intended for the OP who i was pretty sure wouldn't take it badly. you're just some fun collateral damage.

 

[lauranna]

why would you joke like that?

reminds me of this: http://www.typologycentral.com/foru...s/50423-i-don-t-want-live-planet-anymore.html

Honestly, he was joking. I laughed. I have no murderous tendancies and I'm sure he doesn't either. I'm not sure what fripping types as but I found it funny so maybe its the difference between an ISTP inappropriate sense of humour and an INFJ taking it all a bit seriously! Don't worry about it!

 

[Rex]

Keep joking about it... that way evolution takes its course.

 

[jixmixfix]

I fancy an INTJ. What's wrong with me?!!! Clearly we are totally incompatible. Shes intellectual and geeky and sophisticated and plans everything to within an inch of it's life. I do what I want when I want and still eat with my hands.
Could this ever work? I fear I may end up wanting to kill her and she will definitely want to kill me! X

screw INTJs they are boring.

 

[lauranna]

screw INTJs they are boring.

Good point- I must be sick!

 

[jixmixfix]

Good point- I must be sick!

The best relationships I've had were with EXXP types, especially ENTP's too much fun.

 

[lauranna]

The best relationships I've had were with EXXP types, especially ENTP's too much fun.

I don't tend to date other Ps. mostly I'm attracted to very organised people because it's a skill I totally don't have. Maybe I should try it sometime!