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[SP] SP's and Cheating

Lady_X

Well-known member
Joined
Oct 27, 2008
Messages
18,235
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
784
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
ARE YOU SERIOUS? Oh wow, that just blows my mind. It amazes me how some people can be like, "Uh hey...baby...I just found this really hot piece of tail that's in to me, so I'm going to have to treat you like some kind of anti-virus program and tell you that we're broken up for the next 24 hours and then after that our relationship is back on. Mmkay?"

Unbe-freaking-lievable. I just can't wrap my head around the thought of how someone can be so up their own ass to even think of saying something like that.

What's worse is that HE got upset when you did the EXACT SAME THING back to him! I swear, people can just be so stupid!!!
um...yeah i would've laughed at him after he said 24 hours and walked out to never call him again. ...the fucking nerve!!
 

Bamboo

New member
Joined
Jan 28, 2009
Messages
2,689
MBTI Type
XXFP
I've never cheated, but as I've wrote at some length about on the forum, I've been the other guy...many times. That's something I've given up though.

Rationale:
By one standard, I don't have any commitment to whoever the girl is dating or seeing. If it's consensual between me and her, well, that's fine. I can't really rule it out on that basis. There are however, the real implications of messing up their relationship and hurting them and potentially, if there are children, messing with them.

But what it really comes down to is this: I don't want to be involved with dishonest people. If you don't have the ability to be straight with someone who is apparently your 'significant other', then you're probably dishonest nearly everywhere else in life. Individuals who lie about these things lack backbone and need to step up and manage their insecurities. They are part of the "big picture" problem of a society which cannot or will not communicate directly with each other in order to foster the change which is needed to keep things running smoothly. These aren't people I want to be involved with, and it's not someone who I would like to be.

Since I've "gone good" I have gained a lot of pride from my honesty. I tend to be very upfront with everyone I get involved with. I really regret messing around with all these girls. It's brought me little but short term thrills followed by longer term angst.
 

miss fortune

not to be trusted
Joined
Oct 4, 2007
Messages
20,589
Enneagram
827
Instinctual Variant
sp/so
um...yeah i would've laughed at him after he said 24 hours and walked out to never call him again. ...the fucking nerve!!

I'm forgiving... very forgiving... there's just some lines you don't cross :)

In that case I decided to teach him a lesson... that having someone prefer someone else hurts... I thought he'd learned but he didn't :thelook:

narcissistic assholes are rather horrible :thumbdown:
 

kendoiwan

I am Sofa King!!!
Joined
Dec 24, 2008
Messages
1,334
MBTI Type
IsTP
Short answer: I have in the past, I will in the future, not currently, making efforts to continue not to currently but shit happens so I allow for that.
 

millerm277

New member
Joined
Feb 1, 2008
Messages
978
MBTI Type
ISTP
Short answer: I have in the past, I will in the future, not currently, making efforts to continue not to currently but shit happens so I allow for that.

I am kind of confused as to how "shit happens". I'm not trying to attack you (sorry if it comes off that way), I'm legitimately wondering. I'm a very controlled person, and don't always understand the mindset of those with their emotions under less control, so I'm actually curious.

I kind of understand the "Got drunk/high, lost control of myself", although if I cared, I'd think I just wouldn't put myself in that position, but what other circumstances would cause you to?
 

kendoiwan

I am Sofa King!!!
Joined
Dec 24, 2008
Messages
1,334
MBTI Type
IsTP
I am kind of confused as to how "shit happens". I'm not trying to attack you (sorry if it comes off that way), I'm legitimately wondering. I'm a very controlled person, and don't always understand the mindset of those with their emotions under less control, so I'm actually curious.

I kind of understand the "Got drunk/high, lost control of myself", although if I cared, I'd think I just wouldn't put myself in that position, but what other circumstances would cause you to?

Lets just say you and I have entirely different "codes". You believe in being honest with everyone. I believe the only person I need to be 100% honest with is myself.
 

kendoiwan

I am Sofa King!!!
Joined
Dec 24, 2008
Messages
1,334
MBTI Type
IsTP
I'm in the mood for the long version:

Once about 8 years ago, I on my way to work I would see the same woman everyday. We rode the same car (Subway), had to get off the same stop. She worked in this building I worked in that. There was chemistry. We never spoke, but we were certainly aware of each other.

It killed me. She was attractive to say the least. I wanted to say something. I'd be lying to myself if I said I didn't. But I shouldn't. Relationship and all that. I didn't. I can't say I felt any better for not speaking.

Time passes. Same dance. Work. Same car. I see her. She sees me. Nobody speaks. Killing me inside.

One day I say, "fuck this!", I speak. She thought I'd never say something. Same day we do lunch. She's in a relationship. So am I. This can work. By the end of the week we'de had sex on a rooftop during lunch (summertime).

Long story short, C'est la vi.
 
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