[ISTP] Mixed messages from an istp

[lilypad]

Me and my istp fella have been on and off for 5 years and lived together. Recently things have gone downhill, before christmas things were good, then suddenly we started to really not get along, cut a long story short we broke up 8 weeks ago. I felt he wasn't making an effort with me anymore, I guess he felt the same.

To be honest I haven't let go, I've asked him to reconsider a few times, he has never said he doesn't love me anymore, simple that 'he has to do this, he doesn't want to' because we don't get along.

Recently he found out his father was ill, he got in touch with me and we arranged to spend some time together, we had a lovely night in and he stayed the whole following day even though we couldn't do anything active together that day. When he left he went to leave his keys - I asked him 'have you made up your mind then, are we not going to resolve things?' he cried and simply said 'I don't know'. I handed back the keys and said 'You give them back then, when you know'.

I wanted to leave things open for him as in the past few weeks I have come to realise that I can be far too emotional sometimes, bordering on clingy. I'm just wondering if any other istps are as indecisive as he is? Or am I holding on to false hope?

I am an enfj btw.
Thanks

 

[ChocolateMoose123]

Too little details to tell. I don't know and don't want to presume but the fact that he cried meant that he probably is under a lot of stress and is unable to accurately make decisions - especially emotional ones - at this time.

Do what you feel you need to do to be happy and do what you can live with.

 

[lilypad]

Thats good advice, I am going to go against type and chill out haha!

 

[sLiPpY]

Sounds like you were a good friend to him. Least for me, my emotions don't really process on a connected level. They just kind of perculate and bubble up to the surface periodically.