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[ISFP] ISFP Ladies

niberrizbe25

New member
Joined
Mar 5, 2010
Messages
36
MBTI Type
ENXP
Enneagram
4/7
To you ISFP ladies, I have to say this: "Thank you for being so enticingly awesome. you are, simply put, the coolest sensory users. I would like to know what you find attractive in a guy. This is open ended; general things and details are both useful. Also, if you wouldn't mind I would like to know what kind of dates do you find to be the most stimulating.
I have good intetions, I swear ;)

Nico
 

goodgrief

New member
Joined
Apr 3, 2010
Messages
480
MBTI Type
INTJ
My friend is ISFP. She is quite friendly and fun, but she can be stubborn.
 

LeafAndSky

New member
Joined
Nov 12, 2009
Messages
307
MBTI Type
ISFP
To you ISFP ladies, I have to say this: "Thank you for being so enticingly awesome. you are, simply put, the coolest sensory users. I would like to know what you find attractive in a guy. This is open ended; general things and details are both useful. Also, if you wouldn't mind I would like to know what kind of dates do you find to be the most stimulating.
I have good intetions, I swear ;)

Nico

I'm probably twice the age of most around here, but thank you for the generalized group compliment anyway, and I'll give you an answer.

Maybe you have good intentions, or are doing a scientific survey, or feel unsure of yourself and that makes you ask for advice. So I'll give you a break and not say that your intentions don't seem all that good, I swear. ;)

What I find attractive in a guy would not be:

(a) someone trying to figure out what kind of dates would win over an ISFP and then trying to create those occasions, or
(b) someone wanting to know what ISFPs find attractive and then trying to be that guy.

I would want someone to be themselves. Then, if there are things that both of us enjoy, those activities will make good things for dates. And if there are qualities a guy has that attract me, and ones I have that attract a guy, we have something very real to explore and delight in, and no one is pretending, and no one will be used.

Authenticity. And see what happens from there.
 

sLiPpY

New member
Joined
Oct 14, 2009
Messages
2,003
MBTI Type
ISTP
Enneagram
9w8
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
My friend is ISFP. She is quite friendly and fun, but she can be stubborn.

An SP stubborn? What?!?!?! You have got to be kidding me. :thumbup:
 

countrygirl

New member
Joined
Jan 7, 2009
Messages
722
MBTI Type
ISFJ
I'm probably twice the age of most around here, but thank you for the generalized group compliment anyway, and I'll give you an answer.

Maybe you have good intentions, or are doing a scientific survey, or feel unsure of yourself and that makes you ask for advice. So I'll give you a break and not say that your intentions don't seem all that good, I swear. ;)

What I find attractive in a guy would not be:

(a) someone trying to figure out what kind of dates would win over an ISFP and then trying to create those occasions, or
(b) someone wanting to know what ISFPs find attractive and then trying to be that guy.

I would want someone to be themselves. Then, if there are things that both of us enjoy, those activities will make good things for dates. And if there are qualities a guy has that attract me, and ones I have that attract a guy, we have something very real to explore and delight in, and no one is pretending, and no one will be used.

Authenticity. And see what happens from there.

+1

What I loved about my husband when dating him was what you saw was what you got, he was himself. He didn't try to impress me or woo me. Good luck.
 

niberrizbe25

New member
Joined
Mar 5, 2010
Messages
36
MBTI Type
ENXP
Enneagram
4/7
I'm probably twice the age of most around here, but thank you for the generalized group compliment anyway, and I'll give you an answer.

Maybe you have good intentions, or are doing a scientific survey, or feel unsure of yourself and that makes you ask for advice. So I'll give you a break and not say that your intentions don't seem all that good, I swear. ;)

What I find attractive in a guy would not be:

(a) someone trying to figure out what kind of dates would win over an ISFP and then trying to create those occasions, or
(b) someone wanting to know what ISFPs find attractive and then trying to be that guy.

I would want someone to be themselves. Then, if there are things that both of us enjoy, those activities will make good things for dates. And if there are qualities a guy has that attract me, and ones I have that attract a guy, we have something very real to explore and delight in, and no one is pretending, and no one will be used.

Authenticity. And see what happens from there.

Thank you, I appreciate the imput. It changes my perspective about the subject
 

Lady_X

Well-known member
Joined
Oct 27, 2008
Messages
18,235
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
784
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
I'm probably twice the age of most around here, but thank you for the generalized group compliment anyway, and I'll give you an answer.

Maybe you have good intentions, or are doing a scientific survey, or feel unsure of yourself and that makes you ask for advice. So I'll give you a break and not say that your intentions don't seem all that good, I swear. ;)

What I find attractive in a guy would not be:

(a) someone trying to figure out what kind of dates would win over an ISFP and then trying to create those occasions, or
(b) someone wanting to know what ISFPs find attractive and then trying to be that guy.

I would want someone to be themselves. Then, if there are things that both of us enjoy, those activities will make good things for dates. And if there are qualities a guy has that attract me, and ones I have that attract a guy, we have something very real to explore and delight in, and no one is pretending, and no one will be used.

Authenticity. And see what happens from there.
ha! so...isfp fi yeah? i loove it. :)
 

ayoitsStepho

Twerking & Lurking
Joined
Sep 20, 2009
Messages
4,838
MBTI Type
ISFP
Enneagram
4w3
Instinctual Variant
so/sx
I appreciate the love :wubbie:. (It's about time! ;))

What do I find attractive in a guy? That's kind of difficult for me to really say because the guys that I've been attracted to have been kind of random in interests and features.
I do want a fun guy though. Someone who doesn't take life so seriously that he doesn't know how to relax and have a good time. I personally have an affinity to outgoing guys because, from my experience, they really bring me out of my shell and allow me to have fun as well. Idk, I really liked what Raine wrote about showing emotions in a practical way:

How about men who show their emotions through practical ways?

Ex: Putting their coat over your shoulders when it's actually cold outside, grabbing you a snack when you look hungry, and dealing with that jerk that looks like he's bothering you.
I've never really been one whose hearts been captured by someone writing me a song or trying to romance me in a way that seems fit for only television. Just be yourself and involve me in the adventures you're going to partake in and I'm hooked.

I LOVE dates that get me involved outside! Let's go to an amusement park, have a picnic (during the day or at night), riding bikes, ect. I value dates that allow me to see the guy in a better light, when he can be a bit more relaxed and enjoying himself. Personally, I hate going to see movies or strictly going out to dinner. Those are really awkward, sit still kind of environments that I just don't care for. Let's just do something active and fun! Heck, I'd be thrilled to play tag on a date, really. ;)

If you have any other questions, feel free to ask. :)
 

ayoitsStepho

Twerking & Lurking
Joined
Sep 20, 2009
Messages
4,838
MBTI Type
ISFP
Enneagram
4w3
Instinctual Variant
so/sx
+1

What I loved about my husband when dating him was what you saw was what you got, he was himself. He didn't try to impress me or woo me. Good luck.

Yes, this is what I find attractive. +1
 

Julie1962

New member
Joined
Jun 1, 2009
Messages
138
MBTI Type
ISFP
Enneagram
5
Intelligent, confident, open minded, animal and nature lover, and stable.

I enjoyed dates to NYC to different ethnic restaurants, music venues as well as nature activities such as hikes, horseback riding, boating and trips to the beach.

Good luck!
 

niberrizbe25

New member
Joined
Mar 5, 2010
Messages
36
MBTI Type
ENXP
Enneagram
4/7
I appreciate the love :wubbie:. (It's about time! ;))

What do I find attractive in a guy? That's kind of difficult for me to really say because the guys that I've been attracted to have been kind of random in interests and features.
I do want a fun guy though. Someone who doesn't take life so seriously that he doesn't know how to relax and have a good time. I personally have an affinity to outgoing guys because, from my experience, they really bring me out of my shell and allow me to have fun as well. Idk, I really liked what Raine wrote about showing emotions in a practical way:


I've never really been one whose hearts been captured by someone writing me a song or trying to romance me in a way that seems fit for only television. Just be yourself and involve me in the adventures you're going to partake in and I'm hooked.

I LOVE dates that get me involved outside! Let's go to an amusement park, have a picnic (during the day or at night), riding bikes, ect. I value dates that allow me to see the guy in a better light, when he can be a bit more relaxed and enjoying himself. Personally, I hate going to see movies or strictly going out to dinner. Those are really awkward, sit still kind of environments that I just don't care for. Let's just do something active and fun! Heck, I'd be thrilled to play tag on a date, really. ;)

If you have any other questions, feel free to ask. :)

Thank you Steph! That date sounds like a lot of fun. I really enjoy anything with the outdoors and active play. I dont know why people stop playing tag either! I like that the overall advice that I am getting is "just be yourself." There are a lot of people who pretend so much in a first date, which, inevitably, leads to disapointment. Frankly, I am just tired of girls talking themselves up to get in my pants :D. But seriously, I appreciate the advice! I will stray away from corny serenades outside at 3 AM for now... well I didnt stay serious for long... :blush:

Anyways you sound like a cool shiela. You wouldn't be passing by florida any time soon, would you? ;)
 

Clonester

New member
Joined
Jul 5, 2009
Messages
480
MBTI Type
ENFP
One thing that I find very different from me is the ISFP girl I've been dating very much has a need to pull back once in a while and she needs her space. Sometimes we're so close and she's so warm and caring and then the next time she might be a bit withdrawn and need some space. I know the ISFP need for freedom is mentioned in MBTI descriptions, but can an ISFP explain why to me? I'm not sure I fully understand this part of her yet.

I took her on a surprise lunch date a few weeks ago. I met her at her work. She had no idea what we were doing. We walked to a nearby park, and we found a bench to sit down at. I brought along a bag, so I opened it up and pulled out her favourite food (!). So we ate and talked. Then we went for a walk through the park, she was cold and I gave her my jacket. There was a lookout over a river so we stood there for a while and talked some more. It was so great. :wubbie:
 

Grungemouse

Widdles in your cream.
Joined
Feb 5, 2008
Messages
577
MBTI Type
INTP
Enneagram
5
One thing that I find very different from me is the ISFP girl I've been dating very much has a need to pull back once in a while and she needs her space. Sometimes we're so close and she's so warm and caring and then the next time she might be a bit withdrawn and need some space. I know the ISFP need for freedom is mentioned in MBTI descriptions, but can an ISFP explain why to me? I'm not sure I fully understand this part of her yet.

My ISFP girlfriend is like this. There are days when she's all lovey-dovey and affectionate, and then the next few days I'll get nothing. The forum ISFPs will explain this better, but I think it has something to do with them being introverted, as well as experiencing their emotions "in the moment". With introversion you have a person who finds interaction draining after while, hence the need to withdraw. Then you have the SP's desire for freedom and independence in enjoying the moment, which can appear in the form of disappearing off the face of the Earth to play video games, or sleep. SFP types in particular love to experience their current emotions and have the freedom to express/act on them. Hence, the partner is given this impression of a "hot and cold" lover; the ISFP will be focused on you one moment, then something else the next. Just try not to take it personally, or better yet, find something to distract yourself. :) When my girlfriend is having her "cold" days, I take the time to do my own thing.

As my own ISFP says: "I need me time. To feel like myself again."

However, if it really bothers you, you can always say something. If she really likes you, she will happily come to a compromise. You should allow her some space, but the relationship shouldn't be based entirely on her "need to live in the moment". Not if you're both serious about eachother.
 

countrygirl

New member
Joined
Jan 7, 2009
Messages
722
MBTI Type
ISFJ
One thing that I find very different from me is the ISFP girl I've been dating very much has a need to pull back once in a while and she needs her space. Sometimes we're so close and she's so warm and caring and then the next time she might be a bit withdrawn and need some space. I know the ISFP need for freedom is mentioned in MBTI descriptions, but can an ISFP explain why to me? I'm not sure I fully understand this part of her yet.

It is a deep need to just disappear in one's inner world. The freedom is about not being responsible for anything or anyone. If this is not met, for me, I can get very snarly and begin to push people away even my children. My husband usually recognizes this and takes the kids for the day so I can have my space. One of the reasons why I love my husband deeply.

The more you can give this to her when she needs it and not take it personally, the more she will come back to you with loving arms.

I took her on a surprise lunch date a few weeks ago. I met her at her work. She had no idea what we were doing. We walked to a nearby park, and we found a bench to sit down at. I brought along a bag, so I opened it up and pulled out her favourite food (!). So we ate and talked. Then we went for a walk through the park, she was cold and I gave her my jacket. There was a lookout over a river so we stood there for a while and talked some more. It was so great. :wubbie:

*sigh* :wubbie:
 

IZthe411

Carerra Lu
Joined
Jul 19, 2009
Messages
2,585
MBTI Type
INTJ
It is a deep need to just disappear in one's inner world. The freedom is about not being responsible for anything or anyone. If this is not met, for me, I can get very snarly and begin to push people away even my children. My husband usually recognizes this and takes the kids for the day so I can have my space. One of the reasons why I love my husband deeply.

The more you can give this to her when she needs it and not take it personally, the more she will come back to you with loving arms.



*sigh* :wubbie:


So how long does it take an ISFP female to recognize her ways and be able to express that to her SO? If she's hot and cold, I think she should tell this to her dude.
 

man

New member
Joined
Sep 16, 2009
Messages
330
MBTI Type
IntP
Enneagram
=)
Are there any ISFP mans who can explain how they are different than women???
 

ayoitsStepho

Twerking & Lurking
Joined
Sep 20, 2009
Messages
4,838
MBTI Type
ISFP
Enneagram
4w3
Instinctual Variant
so/sx
One thing that I find very different from me is the ISFP girl I've been dating very much has a need to pull back once in a while and she needs her space. Sometimes we're so close and she's so warm and caring and then the next time she might be a bit withdrawn and need some space. I know the ISFP need for freedom is mentioned in MBTI descriptions, but can an ISFP explain why to me? I'm not sure I fully understand this part of her yet.
Well, for myself, I NEED my personal space. I make sure to inform the guys that I've dated, that I need a moment to go away without a phone call or something interrupting me. If I don't get this, then I will not like you after awhile. It's happened on a couple of occasions where this wish had no value to the guys I was with and I ended up being revolted by them and having to break everything off. Once my feelings for someone is gone, it never comes back. So it's very important I get my space. I make darn sure to let the guys in my life know this.

I can be the most lovable, most cuddly, but if I don't get my space everyone once in a while, I become cold.

I took her on a surprise lunch date a few weeks ago. I met her at her work. She had no idea what we were doing. We walked to a nearby park, and we found a bench to sit down at. I brought along a bag, so I opened it up and pulled out her favourite food (!). So we ate and talked. Then we went for a walk through the park, she was cold and I gave her my jacket. There was a lookout over a river so we stood there for a while and talked some more. It was so great. :wubbie:
Aw, now that sounds beautiful! :wubbie:
 
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