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Thread: Istp + Infp =

  1. #21
    heart on fire
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    ISTP too pragmatic and in the moment, everything is now, seems like they will dampen and demean INFP's most central qualities. INFP long to be understood and appreciated by one special lover. I can't see it working out. But I am speaking hypothetically of course. I actually know nothing.

  2. #22
    Rainy Day Woman MDP2525's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Rebe View Post
    From the beginning, he was the 'spill my guts' one and extremely affectionate.

    Personally, when I'm clicking with someone and really enjoying their company I'll stop where we are and just say, "I like you". So I'd like to hear more about gooey ISTP behavior because that's about as gooey as I get.

    Never dated an INFP but my impression of my INFP friend: I like his wit and curiosity about the world and his humor. He was one of the only people who could kick me in the ass with a few well placed words but I wouldn't date him because I think he would exhaust me.
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  3. #23
    Senior Member McRumi's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by heart View Post
    ISTP too pragmatic and in the moment, everything is now, seems like they will dampen and demean INFP's most central qualities. INFP long to be understood and appreciated by one special lover. I can't see it working out. But I am speaking hypothetically of course. I actually know nothing.

    Too pragmatic? Not possible.

  4. #24
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    Quote Originally Posted by MDP2525 View Post
    Personally, when I'm clicking with someone and really enjoying their company I'll stop where we are and just say, "I like you". So I'd like to hear more about gooey ISTP behavior because that's about as gooey as I get.

    Never dated an INFP but my impression of my INFP friend: I like his wit and curiosity about the world and his humor. He was one of the only people who could kick me in the ass with a few well placed words but I wouldn't date him because I think he would exhaust me.
    I _like_ ISTPs. I recently worked with an ISTP on a physically involving project, and was amazed by his mechanical skills, by his ability to see how things would fall when we took away supports (I imagine ISTPs excel at controlled demolitions); I also enjoyed his laid back approach to life, he introduced me to some music I like an wouldn't have encountered otherwise (This, for example: Amazon.com: Parking Lot Music: E Vax: Music ); we got along easily and painlessly and had fun.

    BUT, for a great LTR, I need one or more of these things:

    1) Emotional stroking
    2) Intellectual connection/stimulation
    3) Security, AKA secure anchoring in the real world

    No type is perfect, no type "fully" provides all three. An INTJ, for example, might provide much of 2, some of 1 & 3. An ESTJ might provide 3, but neither 1 nor 2. ISTPs do not provide any of the three for me, and I suspect I'd likewise fail to fulfill their needs...

  5. #25
    Senior Member McRumi's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Fecal McAngry View Post

    BUT, for a great LTR, I need one or more of these things:

    1) Emotional stroking
    2) Intellectual connection/stimulation
    3) Security, AKA secure anchoring in the real world

    ISTPs do not provide any of the three for me, and I suspect I'd likewise fail to fulfill their needs...
    You're dead wrong on #2..or not intellectually stimulating enough yourself to engage the ISTPs very nimble intelligence.

    ISTPs can be trained to do #1 if the significant other is significant enough.

    And they get better at #3 as they get older.

  6. #26
    failure to thrive AphroditeGoneAwry's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by McRumi View Post
    You're dead wrong on #2..or not intellectually stimulating enough yourself to engage the ISTPs very nimble intelligence.

    ISTPs can be trained to do #1 if the significant other is significant enough.

    And they get better at #3 as they get older.
    You are absolutely right as far as I know it, knowing istps like I do.

    And, sometimes, much to my chagrin, most of the women my husband is attracted to are infps.
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  7. #27
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    Quote Originally Posted by McRumi View Post
    You're dead wrong on #2..or not intellectually stimulating enough yourself to engage the ISTPs very nimble intelligence.

    ISTPs can be trained to do #1 if the significant other is significant enough.

    And they get better at #3 as they get older.
    :yim_rolling_on_the_ Bolded is where you personally will struggle with INFP. Get offended much?
    Im out, its been fun

  8. #28
    Senior Member McRumi's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by poki View Post
    :yim_rolling_on_the_ Bolded is where you personally will struggle with INFP. Get offended much?
    LOL.
    My neighbor is an INFP. We get along great. But he can go on and on and on about certain topics...need to nip him in the bud every now and then and things are fine. Or ask him to make a batch of margaritas. INFPs DO Love to please! God love em~!

    Wasn't offended at all...just needed to correct the record. ISTP waters run deep and many (esp NFs) are clueless as to how to reach them...and therefore assume they don't exist.

  9. #29
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    totally possible. All the INFP has to do is make the ISTP think they're actually an ENFP. Find some similar interests, drive your car faster and you're in!

  10. #30
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    Quote Originally Posted by McRumi View Post
    You're dead wrong on #2..or not intellectually stimulating enough yourself to engage the ISTPs very nimble intelligence.

    ISTPs can be trained to do #1 if the significant other is significant enough.

    And they get better at #3 as they get older.
    I'm talking, of course, from my perspective. I assume my perspective is shared by many INFPs. I personally find a preference for sensation = lack of intellectual stimulation.

    And to an INFP, the emotional stroking of an ISTP is likely to leave us starving, no matter how well-intended...

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