[ISTP] ISTPs and people

[toast]

I'm not sure how to word this but I hope I get the question across clear enough.

I'm with an ISTP and I notice that the source of all his excitement / energy / lust for life comes from either: inanimate objects, socializing with people he doesn't know too well (and there's a strict criteria for that, below) & pets.

With people, he only acts truly 'stimulated' if there will be people among the group that he is acquainted with but, under those conditions, the more strangers there are, the more excited he gets. (Example: he would never be dragged to a party where he didn't know anyone well enough but he still actively seeks out situations where he's surrounded by new faces.)

With anyone he knows well, he tends to lose his energy. Even if the event is exciting or he seems to be enjoying himself, his mood never goes any higher than "comfortable" (unless he's really drunk). But if you offer to buy him snacks, a gadget or show him a cat, he's near extroverted about his excitement.

It seems fairly normal, I suppose, to a point. I have never seen him stray from this pattern though. I'm pretty sure I never really saw him excited or thrilled over anything we did together (unless many others were involved) once I knew I had his trust. I had an idea that maybe he just naturally likes things that don't expect anything from him... Like the affection he can display towards pets is, just wow.

Any other ISTPs or SPs feel they relate to this? I want to understand it better. Also, any ISTPs ever actually been really excited about a specific person? And I don't mean an activity with a person or a chance to get away from boredom but really anxious/happy to see or be around someone?

 

[KDude]

I'm pretty sure I'm an ISTP (but with some F?). I just registered here as an ISFP too. Kind of confused still, so I'm sorry if that isn't helpful..

I feel that way about pets.. How different I can be compared with people. Oddly, I was just noticing this about myself today.

I get that way at parties with strangers too, but since I drink at parties, one could attribute that to just having a good buzz/lesser inhibition.

I don't know if I've ever been excited about "snacks" (are you sure he's not a pet as well ? ). But I do get kind of goofy if someone wants to make a run to the store or get something to eat. I'm restless.. love my little breaks from routine. Perhaps that's all it is for your friend - even if it's just gadgets and snacks!

 

[iamathousandapples]

No way. The only way I can be stimulated by people is by being around people I know. If not I just end up crawling in a hole.

 

[Kingfisher]

yeah, i kind of see what thousandapples is talking about. i like to be around a sort of core group of people that i know really well, that i have a long and established and well-worn relationship with. that is pretty exciting to me.

 

[bcvcdc]

yup, i'm in heaven with, ok... a slight breeze and a mist. Oh, a specific person? nah...

 

[Heinel]

I'm pretty sure I'm an ISTP (but with some F?). I just registered here as an ISFP too. Kind of confused still, so I'm sorry if that isn't helpful..

I feel that way about pets.. How different I can be compared with people. Oddly, I was just noticing this about myself today.

I get that way at parties with strangers too, but since I drink at parties, one could attribute that to just having a good buzz/lesser inhibition.

I don't know if I've ever been excited about "snacks" (are you sure he's not a pet as well ? ). But I do get kind of goofy if someone wants to make a run to the store or get something to eat. I'm restless.. love my little breaks from routine. Perhaps that's all it is for your friend - even if it's just gadgets and snacks!

I like this avatar!

And to OP: How sure are you of his excitement level? Are you sure he's not overcompensating for his stress?

 

[Grungemouse]

My ISTP is like this, to some degree, about everything. Not necessarily new people or things, but who she hasn't spoken to in a while. She gets bored of the too familiar, finds something new and exciting, and returns when she's bored of it (possibly for losing it's shininess). If she hasn't spoken to you for awhile, she'll be like, "Hello, how are things?" and then she disappears off the face of the Earth for another year. It isn't a case of being bored of people for evars! Just bored for now. I think ISTPs just need a vacation away from familiar people and things, just so they have time to feel the impact of the absence. Or maybe just the boredom of whatever is right infront of them. My ISTP recently got Facebook, and I'm preparing myself for a long psychological absence. That is, until she grows bored of it. I don't take it too personally, because I know she loves me. At least, she always pings back after her absence.

 

[sLiPpY]

hmm...I resemble the OP

It's not something I understand, nothing on a consious level I can relate...it simply is.

I prefer spending time with people I like and know well, in the scenarios where there are a lot of people I don't know at all.

I get around, but it's more like being on autopilot. Maybe more energy is shown in those scenarios because it literally burns and requires more.

 

[StephMC]

...I notice that the source of all his excitement / energy / lust for life comes from either: ... pets.

...But if you offer to buy him snacks, a gadget or show him a cat, he's near extroverted about his excitement.

So true...

As for the strangers thing... that's kinda interesting. I get very drained with large groups of strangers unless I'm in a familiar territory or I'm with a person I'm comfortable with. Or it's a really fun, upbeat environment. Or if there's alcohol.

I'm sure I'll have more to add later.

 

[SilkRoad]

With anyone he knows well, he tends to lose his energy. Even if the event is exciting or he seems to be enjoying himself, his mood never goes any higher than "comfortable" (unless he's really drunk). But if you offer to buy him snacks, a gadget or show him a cat, he's near extroverted about his excitement.

I have a friend who I am fairly sure is ISTP...Your "snacks" comment rings a bell with me. We are both Canadian and I knew him when he was living in the UK like me, and we'd have long silly discussions about unhealthy cereals available when we were children...he would get really excited about that stuff...

He's one of those people who frustrate me a bit because I tended to feel like he had lots of unrealised potential just because he wasn't very motivated. I mean, he was a bit of a workaholic when I knew him, but it seemed like it was mainly so he could compete with his older brothers...not because of any deeper inner motivation...and he'll get into ruts where he seems bored and unhappy but just doesn't appear to have the motivation to get out of it...

 

[sLiPpY]

I remember seeing a box of King Vitamin Cereal I hadn't been able to find
since I was a kid and getting really excited. Food rocks!

 

[SilkRoad]

I remember seeing a box of King Vitamin Cereal I hadn't been able to find
since I was a kid and getting really excited. Food rocks!

This is EXACTLY what my friend is like!!

 

[sLiPpY]

As to the OP, I can remember my dad's interactions being more energetic and up-beat with strangers. Or when he was getting ready to go do an activity with a friend...

Really sucks shit sometimes to have the realization, the ISTP didn't fall very far from the tree.

 

[sLiPpY]

This is EXACTLY what my friend is like!!

Does your friend also make facial expressions indicating extreme content when eating exceptional food. At least exceptionally good to them?

Went out to lunch with some people from work one day and started talking about Ice Cream. The desired target was reasonably close and in the same parking lot.

Everyone else was too full for ice cream, but the driver and others were kind enough to oblige with the drive through indulgence.

So there I "is" leaning out of the back window of a big SUV, talking with keeper of the scoop.

"I want two scoops of Birthday Cake Ice Cream, in a Waffle Cone please!"

The keeper of the scoop repeated the order back.

"Yes! Exactly!...that's exactly what I want!"

I became very self conscious when the entire vehicle burst into laughter and said that I sounded like a little kid.

They kept turning around and watching me eat the waffle cone, and would laugh in saying they'd rarely seen someone look so content.

Something that's great about this site is interacting with people and trading experience, helps me more easily recognize previously invisible types...especially one's own.

 

[JoSunshine]

With people, he only acts truly 'stimulated' if there will be people among the group that he is acquainted with but, under those conditions, the more strangers there are, the more excited he gets. (Example: he would never be dragged to a party where he didn't know anyone well enough but he still actively seeks out situations where he's surrounded by new faces.)

One of my best friends (of over 5 years) is an ISTP and she is JUST like that. I call her way of being in social situations like you described her "public persona". Now that being said, it is not that she is fake in public, it is like someone gives her a silly/crazy pill in those situations...it's just her nature. Of course, sometimes we are down right silly together...we often have buckets of fun. But when it is just the two of us hanging out, watching movies, whatever (which we do a lot of), she is very chill. We will literally spend 24 hours hanging out and not even speaking to each other that much (she might be taking a nap while I am reading a book). I personally really like my relationship with her. As far as I'm concerned it's the best of both worlds (wild/crazy and relaxed/chill). I like it.

 

[SilkRoad]

Does your friend also make facial expressions indicating extreme content when eating exceptional food. At least exceptionally good to them?

He might, I don't quite remember but he probably does! I don't see him enough any more though cause he's back in Canada I miss that guy, he was someone I always felt comfortable around, had a laugh (and once in a while a deep/deepish conversation) and I always felt I knew where I stood with him - there are a lot of people you can't say that about. He also told me once when he was feeling really stressed about life that I was one of the few people he didn't mind being around when he felt like that. I thought that was really nice

 

[Randomnity]

I identify with half of this I guess? I haven't really been enjoying social situations for a while now, for some reason (even good friends). It just drains me and isn't fun. I might just be cranky lately about too much roommate interaction, though.

I've never liked social situations with a lot of strangers either though, I get very anxious and uncomfortable. I definitely prefer to be with good friends over strangers or acquaintances.

I'm not generally excited to see people but I have been on occasion.

 

[mcmartinez84]

I'm not sure how to word this but I hope I get the question across clear enough.

I'm with an ISTP and I notice that the source of all his excitement / energy / lust for life comes from either: inanimate objects, socializing with people he doesn't know too well (and there's a strict criteria for that, below) & pets.

With people, he only acts truly 'stimulated' if there will be people among the group that he is acquainted with but, under those conditions, the more strangers there are, the more excited he gets. (Example: he would never be dragged to a party where he didn't know anyone well enough but he still actively seeks out situations where he's surrounded by new faces.)

With anyone he knows well, he tends to lose his energy. Even if the event is exciting or he seems to be enjoying himself, his mood never goes any higher than "comfortable" (unless he's really drunk). But if you offer to buy him snacks, a gadget or show him a cat, he's near extroverted about his excitement.

It seems fairly normal, I suppose, to a point. I have never seen him stray from this pattern though. I'm pretty sure I never really saw him excited or thrilled over anything we did together (unless many others were involved) once I knew I had his trust. I had an idea that maybe he just naturally likes things that don't expect anything from him... Like the affection he can display towards pets is, just wow.

Any other ISTPs or SPs feel they relate to this? I want to understand it better. Also, any ISTPs ever actually been really excited about a specific person? And I don't mean an activity with a person or a chance to get away from boredom but really anxious/happy to see or be around someone?

'Fraid I don't have a ton to say right off. But. I get excited about seeing a *couple* of people with the sole purpose of just seeing them. Most of them I have to do things with. I'm not good at just being there with people.

My ISTP is like this, to some degree, about everything. Not necessarily new people or things, but who she hasn't spoken to in a while. She gets bored of the too familiar, finds something new and exciting, and returns when she's bored of it (possibly for losing it's shininess). If she hasn't spoken to you for awhile, she'll be like, "Hello, how are things?" and then she disappears off the face of the Earth for another year. It isn't a case of being bored of people for evars! Just bored for now. I think ISTPs just need a vacation away from familiar people and things, just so they have time to feel the impact of the absence. Or maybe just the boredom of whatever is right infront of them. My ISTP recently got Facebook, and I'm preparing myself for a long psychological absence. That is, until she grows bored of it. I don't take it too personally, because I know she loves me. At least, she always pings back after her absence.

This is fairly accurate. I've been friends with a girl for almost 20 years now and I hardly ever talk to her now that we don't live near each other. Then about 1-2 times a year we'll talk for a few hours on the phone and catch up on everything. I know I get bored with people, move on to hanging out with other people, drifting back and forth between them... It's not really that there's something wrong, I just need new stuff to keep my interest. It seems like after a point I've figured most people out and nothing is new at all until a bigger span of time has gone by.

So true...

As for the strangers thing... that's kinda interesting. I get very drained with large groups of strangers unless I'm in a familiar territory or I'm with a person I'm comfortable with. Or it's a really fun, upbeat environment. Or if there's alcohol.

I'm sure I'll have more to add later.

Yeah, I relate to that. I can't really handle being in a new place with mostly new people. I feel like I'm nagging the one person I know and of course it's a new place, so idk where anything is or what I can do... I mean...I'll do it, but it's not my thing. Definitely draining.

I remember seeing a box of King Vitamin Cereal I hadn't been able to find
since I was a kid and getting really excited. Food rocks!

I just posted a status on Facebook today about how much I love eating cheerios! I haven't had them in so long...and I did today...and