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[ISTP] Can ISTPs be cruel and unempathic?

cooliogirly1000

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Can their undeveloped feelings, project as being mean. Like when you ask an ISTP for help or advice on something that is of little importance to them in their view, they just give you a direct answer without thinking how this might affect you even if you have told them it means a lot to you? Why are they not sympathetic and unempathic?

Why is it when the opposite is done to them, they hide under a rock and act victimised? Sorrry to generalise all ISTPs:huh:
 

wolfy

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Anyone can be blunt and not empathise. I don't know about the rest, sounds like you're blowing off steam. If they are like that, find someone else to turn to for advice.

Some people like to give out blunt answers but can't take their own medicine.
 

sLiPpY

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If I see something as being self-inflicted and/or had already given advice and the person chose to do the opposite anyway...

Most definately. :yes:

There are also times when being blunt in communicating hurts feelings that aren't considered in discussing a subject. i.e. the difference between discussing politics with a family member and a group on a forum.
 

LEGERdeMAIN

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It's best to be honest when giving advice, which I'm very good at. On the other hand, I don't appreciate other people's advice, no matter how it's given.
 

GHC

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I believe any type can be cruel and unempathic at a determinated moment just in different ways, no just ISTP.
 

sLiPpY

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oh, dear gawd... I have no patience with women in peril dramas. :thelook:
 

cooliogirly1000

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hahaha not only that guy but I have one friend and a cousin who are ISTPs. I am just learning about personality types and realising what they all have in common. They're really blunt and say things like it is, but when the tables are turned they usually do not like people telling them the harsh truth.
 

GHC

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If you can dish out, you should be able to take some of your own medicine. If this person is constantly saying crude or hurtful things to you but he gets upset when you are the one who do it I just seem him as a temperamental jerk and you should called him out for that behavior.

Being honest or truthful doesn't give you a right to be a Jerk, IMO.
 

Southern Kross

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My Dad's an ISTP and he's tends to say hurtful or insenstive things but he never means it to be taken that way. He rarely says anything unkind intentionally but he often fails to forsee the impact of his words. He has trouble comprehending how everyone else can twist his words around to create an insult out of an innocent comment. He probably needs to think a little more before speaking but sometimes people just need to chill.
 

NewEra

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Like when you ask an ISTP for help or advice on something that is of little importance to them in their view, they just give you a direct answer without thinking how this might affect you even if you have told them it means a lot to you? Why are they not sympathetic and unempathic?

Why is it when the opposite is done to them, they hide under a rock and act victimised?

Definitely not true for ISTPs alone. Many types have this trait. Heck, many people have this trait, regardless of type.
 

BlueScreen

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Can their undeveloped feelings, project as being mean. Like when you ask an ISTP for help or advice on something that is of little importance to them in their view, they just give you a direct answer without thinking how this might affect you even if you have told them it means a lot to you? Why are they not sympathetic and unempathic?

Why is it when the opposite is done to them, they hide under a rock and act victimised? Sorrry to generalise all ISTPs:huh:


This from personalitypage, about getting stuck too much in Ti.

personalitypage.com said:
The ISTP resists and rejects anything that doesn't support their own experiential understanding of the world. If there is a conflict between their own way of life and something that they encounter, they don't perceive that "something" in an objective sense. Rather, they reject it to avoid conflict and to preserve the sanctity of their inner world.

We can do the same, but with values rather than reason. It is one of the joys of introverted functions that are disconnected from the object. There's an equivalent one for being stuck in Fi.

personalitypage.com said:
May be unable to acknowledge or hear anything that goes against their personal ideas and opinions

You find conflict in the sense that ISTPs don't conform or adapt to your values. But in doing that, you reject their alternate value system as quickly as they reject your questions.
 

millerm277

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hahaha not only that guy but I have one friend and a cousin who are ISTPs. I am just learning about personality types and realising what they all have in common. They're really blunt and say things like it is, but when the tables are turned they usually do not like people telling them the harsh truth.

Well, you're half right. Kinda. I'm blunt and say things like they are, but with the people that can't handle it, I try to just tell them they're not going to like what I have to say, rather than tell them it.

As for telling me the "harsh truth", I tend to either listen to you, even if I don't like it, or go: :headphne: and pretty much ignore what you say, depending on if I feel you're right or not after thinking about it.
 

KarliJoanne

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yeah, I don't think this is characteristic of ISTPs. An ISTP might not really be able to understand why you feel the way you do, but if you tell them something is really important to you they will really try to make you feel better and find a logical solution to your problem. I think a lack of care is an unhealthy trait any type could have.
 

jixmixfix

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My Dad's an ISTP and he's tends to say hurtful or insenstive things but he never means it to be taken that way. He rarely says anything unkind intentionally but he often fails to forsee the impact of his words. He has trouble comprehending how everyone else can twist his words around to create an insult out of an innocent comment. He probably needs to think a little more before speaking but sometimes people just need to chill.

I have an ISTJ father and I am ISTP and I think his words are cruel as well sometimes. So It's not really an ISTP thing.
 

NewEra

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I have an ISTJ father and I am ISTP and I think his words are cruel as well sometimes. So It's not really an ISTP thing.

Exactly. Heck, just as an example, my dad is ENTJ and he can be very cruel and unempathetic.
 

mcmartinez84

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Well, you're half right. Kinda. I'm blunt and say things like they are, but with the people that can't handle it, I try to just tell them they're not going to like what I have to say, rather than tell them it.

I've done this a few times and some people are like "nah, tell me anyway!" and I tell them and I don't sugar coat it at all!! Hey, I gave them a fair warning! And they usually don't like what I have to say. :)

Seriously, when people ask me something, I'm probably going to answer. millerm277 put it well. It depends on who is asking...they might get the forewarning. And as slippy said, if they wanna hear it, I'm gonna say it.
 
R

Riva

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The real question should be -
Can ISTPs not be cruel and unempathic?

ooooops I did it again.
 

Athenian200

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Can their undeveloped feelings, project as being mean. Like when you ask an ISTP for help or advice on something that is of little importance to them in their view, they just give you a direct answer without thinking how this might affect you even if you have told them it means a lot to you? Why are they not sympathetic and unempathic?

Why is it when the opposite is done to them, they hide under a rock and act victimised? Sorrry to generalise all ISTPs:huh:

INFJs can be cruel and unempathetic if they're frustrated enough when you ask them, so I'd imagine that ISTPs could certainly be. And when they're criticized, and they act victimized, it's probably... NFJ shadow. You know, the whole martyrdom thing? The rest of the time, they probably talk like that because they consciously think they're tough... but they're not really, not on something that can get to them.

The thing is, a person's sensitivity to others isn't always as strong as their sensitivity to themselves. Some people can dish it out, but can't take it. I have known some INTJs and INTPs who were like that, so I'd imagine ISTPs could be like that as well.
 
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