[ISFP] Is the only way to make an ISFP talk 'is' to strangle them?

[nynesneg]

I love to talk. 'We Cardassians love to talk'. But when it comes to ISFPs..... Arghhhhh!

Gul-dukat++

So let me ask you a sort of related question, although not about ISFPs. Do you as an ENTP ever have trouble getting your thoughts across in a discussion? I often have a very interesting opinion I want to tell when co-workers debate, etc. But I get started expressing it and have trouble saying it in a way that makes sense to the other people. Or at least convincing them. lol. After making my point if they argue back theirs (which obviously I have reasons to disagree with), I have trouble explaining mine in a way to counter the argument. Usually if the other person is really opinionated too, I end up just getting quiet and basically saying ok, you win.

 

[LotsOfHeart]

I think it totally depends on the person.

I have a pretty good friend who is an ISFP and he is extremely talkative. In fact, I totally saw him as an ENFJ before I had him take the test. I guess I had just confused Fi for Fe. Anyway, the point is some ISFPs are plenty talkative and your friend might just be extremely introverted. If that's the case it's important to take how he feels in each situation into account and don't force him to talk or be around others if he seems like he doesn't want to be. If this behavior continues, try talking to him about it, in a very understanding and well-meaning way. If you do that, he'll probably listen and work to improve this part of his personality.

 

[Jeffster]

I don't have a problem talking with friends. With strangers, I'm not so good, but I've gotten better as I've gotten older.

I'm not good at starting conversations, even with friends, but in a scenario like the one you posted I don't think I would have a problem. I'm a great storyteller.

 

[Julie1962]

I hate being an ISFP for this exact reason; I can't express myself verbally. My emotions, knowledge, opinions are all clear in my mind and as soon as I open my mouth I sound stupid, convoluted and retarded. It's a source of anxiety for me. I hate socializing for this reason. Even with my husband who is an ENFJ .. the best communicator .. I freeze. He becomes impatient with my lack of a response and has some sarcastic remark. After 23 years of this I was happy to have found out my MB type and give him an article about ISFPs that explains me. Still ... I find it hard to express myself and therefore I don't. I keep my mouth shut and let the world just blab away .. usually about nothing interesting or important. Worse thing for me are extroverts who just don't get that it take more time for me to respond. My next marriage will be to a fellow introvert, that is for sure.

 

[wolfy]

I don't have a problem communicating. I do have a problem with people pushing me to respond quickly. So, pass on a message from me... Take your time, tell them to back off.

 

[poppy]

I love to talk. 'We Cardassians love to talk'. But when it comes to ISFPs..... Arghhhhh!

Is it just me or is it all of us?

I have an ISFP friend. And every time anyone talks to him he just loses his tongue.

This is an example as to how annoying it is to talk to my ISFP friend.

He - (Enthusiastically) i saw a girl at my bio lecture.
I - yeah is she cute?
He - yes, but.........
I - but what?
He- she is, you know, she is............... she went
I - (PISSED OFF) she WHAT???????
He -i was.... when she got.....
I -(EXTREMELY ANNOYED) you were what????? about to squeeze her butt???
He - Noooooooooooooooooooooo. i went..... then .... the lecturer
I -ohhhh you went to talk to her?
He -YESSSSS!!!
I - but then the lecturer came???
He -yes, yes, yes
I - so you couldn't talk to her?
He -yes.. and she was wearing green and you know, you know.... and ... you
I - (completely lost and infuriated) what the???
He - stares at me and smiles
I -ohhh you were gonna comment about what she was wearing because it was beautiful?.
but when you were going to say hi, the lecturer came so you went and sat?
after the lecture she quickly left, so you couldn't talk to her?
He - happily nods as if he nailed the girl.
3 years later he still hasn't spoken to her.

Gosh I get so annoyed when talking to ISFPs.

Ps: we have been friends for about 5 years.

so yes. the answer to your question is yes.

Yeah, I'm always yelling things at my friend like "use English!" "use words!" "use sentences!". He's a sharp kid, but he takes way to long to say something coherently (to be fair, I tend to be pretty impatient).

 

[Quinlan]

I can only speak for myself but it seems to me that 90% of what is said in conversations could have gone without saying, but perhaps I am more perceptive of non verbal cues. I am very content with quiet company and observation, I have no problem speaking if I have something to say but often I simply have nothing to add to the conversation.

 

[nanook]

i (INFp) dont talk, because i want to finish thoughts, before i publish them. there is a beta thought, then there are various release candidates. then i choose to recode from scratch. or think something else. my perceptions are inner images/ideas, that develope. they are never finished, or too spaced out, so i cant express them. especially when driving a car and reflecting on the landscape. it triggers a huge amount of irrational farfetched associations, that could only be expressed by writing a poem about each of them (but i don't have that spontaneous language skill)

i just cant share random halbaked perceptions and emotions, if they don't have somthing to do with the person i am currently (not *g*) talking to.

women and ISFp are not as silent as i am. they actually share a lot more of immediate perceptions or random thoughts, without making/preparing a "point".
but their strenght is asking questions - if they are interested in my mind.

i have never talked as much, as while i was driving this ISFp woman around, two hours a week. she constantly asked for my opinion on things that mattered to her (she was rather confused & agitated). in return I asked her a lot in order to to find out, what understanding she is really looking for. we talked non stop. with most people i would be silent for hours.

 

[BlackCat]

It sounds like your friend is just shy.

 

[entropie]

[YOUTUBE="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ERkH2J8fqsc"].[/YOUTUBE]

 

[Bubbles]

ISFPs and I click. I've never had this problem.

 

[entropie]

It's lonely at the top they say. But they are wrong

 

[Julie1962]

I open up when someone teases me or cracks a good joke. I love sarcasm too. It takes time for me to trust someone enough to talk about anything. Go slow!

 

[Anastar]

He's been your friends for five years, why are you whining now? sack the f*** up. The guy hasn't been talkative for five years, stop complaining when you already know this. What do expect from this anyway? Some miracle solution? A reason? I don't have this problem with ISFP's. Maybe he feels you look down on him, and so he finds it harder to express himself. He probably opens his mouth and expects to see an annoyed expression on your face, which most likely only furthers his withdrawal.

 

[KarliJoanne]

if you strangle an ISFP he will turn blue. and he probably make a painting about it and hide from you from then on.



but seriously, try to be more accepting. ISFPs don't deal well with pressure, and are not skilled at speaking, so the combination is very difficult.

 

[Thalassa]

ISFPs and I click. I've never had this problem.

Same.

But, yeah, your friend might just be shy. In particular he's talking about his feelings for a girl he likes so that might make him even more withdrawn. Some introverts are more introverted than others. It also has to do with the person - maybe your approach makes him quiet, where as he might talk more easily with someone else. Or he just might have a hard time talking about girls he likes. That's not that strange, especially if he is quite young and likes a certain person a lot.

 

[Riva]

I should make it a habit to subscribe to my threads. KIT

So let me ask you a sort of related question, although not about ISFPs. Do you as an ENTP ever have trouble getting your thoughts across in a discussion?

NO!

It sounds like your friend is just shy.

It's not like I am asking him to sit on my lap.

I am just asking questions like do you want a soft drink? or Tea?

Do you want Coke or Pepsi?

WHAT THE FUCK MAN? - Is what goes in my head all the while

 

[Riva]

I open up when someone teases me or cracks a good joke. I love sarcasm too. It takes time for me to trust someone enough to talk about anything. Go slow!

Guess who I am.

He's been your friends for five years, why are you whining now? sack the f*** up. The guy hasn't been talkative for five years, stop complaining when you already know this. What do expect from this anyway? Some miracle solution? A reason? I don't have this problem with ISFP's. Maybe he feels you look down on him, and so he finds it harder to express himself. He probably opens his mouth and expects to see an annoyed expression on your face, which most likely only furthers his withdrawal.

:steam:

*Takes cover*

That is exactly what I am looking for. Tell me if you have some tips.

ISFPs and I click. I've never had this problem.

IxFP communication

9 O'clock

You - Hi
ISFP - Hi

10 O'clock

You - Bye
ISFP - Bye

-------------------

Well done.

 

[IZthe411]

Guess who I am.



:steam:

*Takes cover*

That is exactly what I am looking for. Tell me if you have some tips.



IxFP communication

9 O'clock

You - Hi
ISFP - Hi

10 O'clock

You - Bye
ISFP - Bye

-------------------

Well done.

LOL!! Amen to that....my girlfriend has nothing to say sometimes. I don't like it.

 

[ayoitsStepho]

IxFP communication

9 O'clock

You - Hi
ISFP - Hi

10 O'clock

You - Bye
ISFP - Bye

-------------------

Well done.

Don't forget to add the frisky romping at 9:30