[MBTI General] ISPs: Stuck in Se?

[StephMC]

So I read this about Se as a second function:

Since extraverted Sensing is likely to be a trusted process, they may engage in it in an overprotective and stunting way. At times, others may view them as overly focused on enjoying their own experiences and near-term payoffs. Under stress, they may become too insistent on adapting to the immediate moment and the data in front of them. Then they continually read the ever-changing events around them rather than focus on where they are going and following through with their commitments.

I struggle with this all the time, especially as of late! The worst part is, I'm fully aware of it, I just have no idea how to stop. It's like a charging bull. Every time I start having trouble making a big decision, and exhaust Ti, I throw my hands up and let Se take over. Which doesn't always work like I'd like it to.

Have you other ISTPs/ISFPs struggled with Se in the same way? How in the world do you break yourself of it, even if it's only temporary? Oh, and if anyone else has any input, it would be much appreciated

 

[Jeffster]

I couldn't care less about Se strugg-a-ling, I wanna kiss you!

[/Joe Namath]

 

[StephMC]

I couldn't care less about Se strugg-a-ling, I wanna kiss you!

[/Joe Namath]

 

[Poki]

So I read this about Se as a second function:



I struggle with this all the time, especially as of late! The worst part is, I'm fully aware of it, I just have no idea how to stop. It's like a charging bull. Every time I start having trouble making a big decision, and exhaust Ti, I throw my hands up and let Se take over. Which doesn't always work like I'd like it to.

Have you other ISTPs/ISFPs struggled with Se in the same way? How in the world do you break yourself of it, even if it's only temporary? Oh, and if anyone else has any input, it would be much appreciated

Can you give an example? Not 100% sure I know what your talking about. This sounds alot like dominant Se types because when stressed E types will initially jump into Se which is there strength so not sure how you are relating it to what you are doing.

I know I hit Se for several reasons. There are times when I say screw it and jump into Se without thinking about the consequences. It is like something pulls me into it. I am then forced to go along with my decision and have to kinda flex and bend because of my choice to jump in. Other times I get tired of Ti and just need to escape into Se. It forces me into Se where I have to make quick decisions, its almost like I got stuck in Ti and my Se escape puts me in a rapid Se-Ti cycle where I have to think and react quickly.

 

[JocktheMotie]

I think that when you are having trouble making a decision, it's not that Ti is at fault, but that your Se is still looking for the most tactical opportunity...and waits and waits and waits. So if you're having difficulty coming toa decision on something, you don't want to indulge Se more, but you want to cut it off and simply make a decision on the data you have available right now.

This tends to happen with INTPs too, where Ne is still looking for possibilities and waits until Ti finally takes the reigns and forces a decision.

 

[StephMC]

Can you give an example? Not 100% sure I know what your talking about. This sounds alot like dominant Se types because when stressed E types will initially jump into Se which is there strength so not sure how you are relating it to what you are doing.

I know I hit Se for several reasons. There are times when I say screw it and jump into Se without thinking about the consequences. It is like something pulls me into it. I am then forced to go along with my decision and have to kinda flex and bend because of my choice to jump in. Other times I get tired of Ti and just need to escape into Se. It forces me into Se where I have to make quick decisions, its almost like I got stuck in Ti and my Se escape puts me in a rapid Se-Ti cycle where I have to think and react quickly.

Well it usually only happens if I'm being REALLY indecisive about something...when I'm split in half over something. Or, if I wait too long to decide something... I used the pretense that I was gathering information, but by that point, I have TOO much information which proves to be counterproductive.

Like right now... I put off deciding where I want to be after college. I'm interviewing in NYC now, which is a fun city to be, and I feel it could be really satisfying here... but all my friends are in Houston. So I have a few interviews set up there as well. There's a million factors involved here, but I don't want to ramble too much. Anyways, I've been split into two over the decision AND I've waited too long (need a job pretty soon ), so I just gave up using Ti and am letting Se take over...whatever happens, happens. Or in this case, whatever job I get... decides where I'm going to be.

Anyways, you're right about this sounding like a dominant Se thing...I guess this is when ISPs are under stress. For Se as a dominant function, it says this (or when used in a negative context):

Since Se is often their most trusted process, they may engage it too much. They may over-indulge the senses, insist on getting a lot of data, or proceed only with what they have in the immediate moment. As a result, they may repeat the same experiences over and over, eventually finding themselves limited and bored. They may also act with over-confidence, feeling that they are immune to danger, or they may act too quickly when analysis or a values check is really required

I guess the difference here is, that I see my best friend (ESTP) do this sometimes even without stress, whereas I only do it under stress. I think another reason I've been using it more lately is because I've been "successful" using it over the past few months... which is giving me the false impression that I can use it successfully all the time.

 

[stellar renegade]

I struggle with this all the time, especially as of late! The worst part is, I'm fully aware of it, I just have no idea how to stop. It's like a charging bull. Every time I start having trouble making a big decision, and exhaust Ti, I throw my hands up and let Se take over. Which doesn't always work like I'd like it to.

Have you other ISTPs/ISFPs struggled with Se in the same way? How in the world do you break yourself of it, even if it's only temporary? Oh, and if anyone else has any input, it would be much appreciated

On a related note, I struggle with doing anything regarding things about to happen even a month from now, or a couple weeks. I'm too caught up in immediate enjoyment of things. I really wonder if it's true that my type only really knows how to party. haha.

Kinda sucks. I like being the way I am but I'd also like to be able to break out of this mindset if I feel like it.

 

[StephMC]

I think that when you are having trouble making a decision, it's not that Ti is at fault, but that your Se is still looking for the most tactical opportunity...and waits and waits and waits. So if you're having difficulty coming toa decision on something, you don't want to indulge Se more, but you want to cut it off and simply make a decision on the data you have available right now.

This tends to happen with INTPs too, where Ne is still looking for possibilities and waits until Ti finally takes the reigns and forces a decision.

Ugh... you're so right... Damn it.

 

[Poki]

Well it usually only happens if I'm being REALLY indecisive about something...when I'm split in half over something. Or, if I wait too long to decide something... I used the pretense that I was gathering information, but by that point, I have TOO much information which proves to be counterproductive.

Like right now... I put off deciding where I want to be after college. I'm interviewing in NYC now, which is a fun city to be, and I feel it could be really satisfying here... but all my friends are in Houston. So I have a few interviews set up there as well. There's a million factors involved here, but I don't want to ramble too much. Anyways, I've been split into two over the decision AND I've waited too long (need a job pretty soon ), so I just gave up using Ti and am letting Se take over...whatever happens, happens. Or in this case, whatever job I get... decides where I'm going to be.

Anyways, you're right about this sounding like a dominant Se thing...I guess this is when ISPs are under stress. For Se as a dominant function, it says this (or when used in a negative context):

Thanks, I know exactly what your talking about, i think. Ive got to the point where I dont stress much over these things and just run with whatever happens like allowing your job to decide where you are going to be. To me this is like looking at the big picture. Either way you cant lose. Being SP we adapt really good, so as long as we keep the big picture in mind everything always seems to work out.

 

[stellar renegade]

I guess the difference here is, that I see my best friend (ESTP) do this sometimes even without stress, whereas I only do it under stress. I think another reason I've been using it more lately is because I've been "successful" using it over the past few months... which is giving me the false impression that I can use it successfully all the time.

I do it as instinct, without even thinking about it. It's really hard for me to make decisions about the future. The only deciding factor is often just what appeals to me as the most pleasurable. If I don't know that then I often dawdle until I do.

This whole thing has been tripping me up lately, too.

 

[Poki]

I do it as instinct, without even thinking about it. It's really hard for me to make decisions about the future. The only deciding factor is often just what appeals to me as the most pleasurable. If I don't know that then I often dawdle until I do.

This whole thing has been tripping me up lately, too.

I am learning that if left to my own control I will figure out how to make any situation pleasurable. It allows me to not focus as much on this aspect and more focus on the big picture. When I am not left to my own accord though and I am not able to make things pleasurable I suffer and I start to seek pleasurable. I am not able though to loose the big picture in seeking pleasure though. I think this is Se aux feeding into Ti dominant. Its like a limit or a hard stop to seeking pleasure.

 

[StephMC]

I guess I should also mention I realized that when I get stuck in this Se mode, Fi is involved. Fi as an 8th function:

May become destructive with Fi
They are usually slow to choose what is important to them. They may unconsciously act in congruence with limiting beliefs and misjudge the relative importance of things. When really stressed, they likely wind up spending money and time on things that are their undoing. Yet on occasion they tap into universal values that, when woven into the context of their lives can transform.

Pretty much, when I start getting entwined with Fi, I feel overwhelmed and keep trying to go back to Ti and Se... but usually Se, because I need a perceiving function to use with the judging function. I think I was relating this stress to Se... but when I can detach myself from Fi, Se is comforting. Again, using the job thing as an example, for a while there were certain factors in there that brought out my Fi. But after time, I sought closure in those areas, detached myself from the unhealthy use of Fi, and went back to using Ti + Se. Therefore I now feel comfortable using "whatever job makes me a decent offer" to help me make a decision... And to me that IS a decision I made using Ti (To relate again to Jock's post)... because I rationalized it to be a suitable answer. As Poki said, we can adapt to pretty much anything. Anyways, hope that made sense

 

[JocktheMotie]

I guess I should also mention I realized that when I get stuck in this Se mode, Fi is involved. Fi as an 8th function:



Pretty much, when I start getting entwined with Fi, I feel overwhelmed and keep trying to go back to Ti and Se... but usually Se, because I need a perceiving function to use with the judging function. I think I was relating this stress to Se... but when I can detach myself from Fi, Se is comforting. Again, using the job thing as an example, for a while there were certain factors in there that brought out my Fi. But after time, I sought closure in those areas, detached myself from the unhealthy use of Fi, and went back to using Ti + Se. Therefore I now feel comfortable using "whatever job makes me a decent offer" to help me make a decision... And to me that IS a decision I made using Ti (To relate again to Jock's post)... because I rationalized it to be a suitable answer. As Poki said, we can adapt to pretty much anything. Anyways, hope that made sense

Glad you were able to come to a resolution

 

[StephMC]

Glad you were able to come to a resolution

Me, too! I just hope I can remember this next time this happens again.

 

[Poki]

Me, too! I just hope I can remember this next time this happens again.

It actually gets easier as you get older to the point where you dont have to really try to think about it. This process is alot more natural for me now. People seem to think I am always right, when I just point myself in a direction like you did and then let things happen whatever way they end up happening.

 

[jixmixfix]

Se and TI is complete bullshit. lol

 

[Bamboo]

Read first post and skimmed the rest.

Yeah, I forsake long term strategy for immediate action.

Right now I'm taking a year off college and I'm not sure what I want to go into. Maybe I want to be an architect. Maybe I don't know if I want to even go to college. Maybe I want to do something else.

The above is pretty much the extent of my thinking on the subject of my long term job future.

In the mean time, I'm doing free-lance handyman work and making cash. I'm a reasonably skilled handyman. The opportunities are available. I like cash. So that's what I do.

As for "breaking the cycle," I can't help you there...seems like my solution is just ride it out.

I suppose I made a decent move in terms of trying to make money. No matter what happens in the future (aside from Civil War II or a zombie attack) money will be something I'll want to have.

SO, it might be a decent strategy to make your short-term choices something that can be useful in the long term. Money, transferable skills, connections etc. When big decision time comes around, you'll have resources at your disposal.

 

[WALMART]

I hear you.


I don't suffer from analysis paralysis, I take in information and process it quite quickly, then jam it through the system. If it doesn't work, I learn something. If it does, great. I think about why it worked and how I'll do it better next time.


Every now and then it lands me in hot water, but most times I couldn't give two fucks, I think people pick up on that and leave me alone about it.

 

[ChocolateMoose123]

It actually gets easier as you get older to the point where you dont have to really try to think about it. This process is alot more natural for me now. People seem to think I am always right, when I just point myself in a direction like you did and then let things happen whatever way they end up happening.

Truth.