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[ESTP] How do you deal with ESTPs?

AOA

♣️♦️♠️♥️
Joined
Jan 8, 2009
Messages
4,821
MBTI Type
ENTJ
Enneagram
8
Instinctual Variant
sx
If it weren't for this crappy law, we'd beat the crap out of the 'unhealthy' ESTPs - or, possibly finish them... all the time.

... Reiterated from what someone said earlier, a lot of ESTPs are not particularly talented, though they've somehow developed ways of getting round to genuinely capable people's heads.

One must be aware that an (unhealthy) ESTP may have issues in the head, so that's partly why they're difficult to deal with. They might even centre their existence on other people's lives/problems and make it their own... just for the sake of living on - another reason why they're hard to beat. In this case, they may have no priority over their sense with reality, and require somebody else to 'do' something about them. Pretty sad, to be honest. Only problem is, most people are way too timid (ESTPs included) to conform to such an action... given our laws, too.

... Personally, the best advise I could give is - let the moment with an 'unhealthy' ESTP pass, and soon you'll go about normally. Be grateful you never had to be like that, too.
 

Cimarron

IRL is not real
Joined
Aug 21, 2008
Messages
3,417
MBTI Type
ISTJ
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5w6
Instinctual Variant
sp/so
I have seen very strong friction between ENTJs and ESTPs (I think), in person.
 

mortabunt

Permabanned
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Apr 10, 2009
Messages
963
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type
Enneagram
5
ESTP's: toleration, because I couldn't affect annihilation.
 

Grayscale

Well-known member
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Dec 20, 2007
Messages
1,965
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ISTP
i have a tendency to cut through the bullshit, my feelings and others', and try to see things for what's really happening right in front of us. unfortunately, most people will not do this because of the often times ugly implications that it makes. it's hard to be nice when you see how selfish everyone is. right and wrong dont care how you feel about it... and yet most people pay attention to how things make them feel first and what it really is only if they are forced to. things are not what they seem...

in my opinion, this type will be hard to deal with if you yourself are not real about things. this type will be hard to deal with if social interaction, to you, is merely a composite of passive aggressive habits and feel-goodery. personally, what i really want to do is deal with things and try to make them better, because it's too hard for me to ignore problems. if you are complaining, then i can already tell you that we are not going to get along very well. my advice is to get over yourself and work with me so we can focus on improving what is important to everyone.


i think i get why myself (and possibly this type) can be so tough to deal with... i often amplify the realities of my environment, and let's not forget the competitive streak. if you want to be selfish, then i am going to be selfish better (more likely i will just refuse to deal with you) this usually ends up in the other person losing out in some way, so it's understandable why they wont like that. as social creatures this applies to everyone to some degree so i will try to initiate positive development. as for me, i appreciate the same, and my experience is that i usually return it with plenty of interest since genuinely good actions from other people are such a rarity.
 

Domino

ENFJ In Chains
Joined
Nov 5, 2007
Messages
11,429
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eNFJ
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4w3
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sx/so
it's hard to be nice when you see how selfish everyone is.

Is this your instinctive first impression of people, this "assessment", or is it a secondary reaction to another method of evaluation?
 

sgman

New member
Joined
Jul 24, 2009
Messages
24
MBTI Type
INFP
I haven't had a conversation over 10 minutes long with my ESTP father if I didn't have to for years.

What I hated most about him was that he treated other people better than he treated his own family.

In family gatherings and such, he used to basically "diss" my mother and me, just to make people laugh. Yeah...real popular guy.

He definitely suffered from a lack of integrity. He will change sides in a wink if he thinks it will let him meet his goals.

He's also quite manipulative, just not in an overt manner. An unhealthy ESTP is what they call "the wolf in sheep's clothing."

If I say "no" to anything he asks, I can expect him to say things to try to hurt me. If he can't have what he wants, he'll hurt you for saying no. Bastard.

Basically, the utmost thing you have to keep in mind is: Take everything the ESTP says or does with a grain of salt. Foster some healthy skepticism and try to figure out what he's trying to accomplish. Something he wants you to do? Something he doesn't want you to do?

EDIT: btw, the ESTP's need for control is an expression of Fe. I recently read "the Art of Speedreading people". Pretty much, ESTJs will try to control you, but they do it in a straight forward, brash manner. They tell you straight up what they want, they don't beat around the bush. ESTPs are more likely to get to what they want by charming, manipulating, and getting you to like them, etc. The essential salesperson.
 

stellar renegade

PEST that STEPs on PETS
Joined
Jul 13, 2009
Messages
1,446
MBTI Type
ESTP
Good Lord, I can't believe I just read this entire thing.

Basically I can see how all the descriptions could fit the same basic type. My thought is that since there are only 16 types and way more differences in types of people than that, the types only describe a basic way of functioning that can differentiate widely between people.

ESTPs come in all shades, hues and colors. The temptation is to box people in due to our experience. An ESTP can be controlling or completely liberating, depending on what issues they have and their impulses. All ESTPs in this thread, I think, have admitted to liking being in control or at least influencing others. An ESTP has a natural talent for knowing how others tick and can use this innate ability for good or ill.

I have a strange history in that I acted very differently for the first part of my life, even thinking I was a completely different type. This is what I wrote about my experiences later on, on another forum:

Years later I found myself desperately trying to pursue a spiritual, idealist path because I thought that's what I was, all the while looking exactly like a promoter. I was subconsciously trying to manipulate some of my peers, taking on a mass of other people in a huge flamewar with myself as the lone defender hardly even batting an eyelash, basically in a huge control struggle with a girl who was constantly claiming to attempt suicide, preemptively cutting her off before she could do anything, binding her in total submission to my will.

It's not my will to control others, although I do love subtly influencing them for good. Any attempt on my part, subconscious or otherwise, to stringently control others is something I am ashamed of and would like to apologize to anyone I have done that to.

For the most part I'm just fun-loving and free and love to give others their space. Only when there's a percieved need to fulfill will I be more aggressive (in an attempt that justice be served, I might add).
 

NewEra

New member
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Dec 21, 2008
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3,104
MBTI Type
I
Just tape their mouths shut, and force them into a corner. That should work for an ESTP.
 

Halla74

Artisan Conquerer
Joined
Jan 20, 2009
Messages
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MBTI Type
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7w8
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
Just tape their mouths shut, and force them into a corner. That should work for an ESTP.

Good luck with that strategy. It would be safest to try that if you're close by to a hospital with a great trauma ward. ;)
 

Amargith

Hotel California
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I say distract them by piquing their curiosity ;)
 

Halla74

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I say distract them by piquing their curiosity ;)

That is TOTALLY possible. Boobies will do it, so will nice legs, and of course soft blonde locks of hair resting on our foreheads while we watch a belly dance. :cheese: ESTP is then smitten, no longer a danger to themself or others. :D
 

Amargith

Hotel California
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LOL, that was not the distraction I had in mind, but thanks for the insight into an ESTP's weak spots :D
 

Halla74

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LOL, that was not the distraction I had in mind, but thanks for the insight into an ESTP's weak spots :D

:rofl1:

You didn't say what distraction, JEEZ! :D There are many to choose from indeed. :D

Food actually works pretty damn well! :shock:
 

Amargith

Hotel California
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:rofl1:

You didn't say what distraction, JEEZ! :D There are many to choose from indeed. :D

Food actually works pretty damn well! :shock:

LOL. Yeah..unfortunately, food seems to thrump all for men. I've always found that utterly weird :shock:
 

jenocyde

half mystic, half skeksis
Joined
Jan 2, 2009
Messages
6,387
MBTI Type
ENTP
Enneagram
7w8
The way to distract an ESTP is to simply touch him. If you are speaking, a gentle graze on the forearm will make him notice you. Very touch sensitive, you boys are.
 

JocktheMotie

Habitual Fi LineStepper
Joined
Nov 20, 2008
Messages
8,491
Halla's responses in this thread make me feel like a closet ESTP. Food and tits are the way to go.
 

SillySapienne

`~~Philosoflying~~`
Joined
Jan 14, 2008
Messages
9,801
MBTI Type
ENFP
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4w5
I have sex with them then devour their spirits, play drums with their radii and suck on their marrow till there's no tomorrow.
 
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