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[ISTJ] How do ISTJs flirt?

swordpath

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obviously you need to start hanging out with ESxPs who will find you adorable for that and will happily do most of the picking up themselves because of it :yes:
I need something...
 

Sunny Ghost

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You know what my ISTJ brother-in-law did? He would invite my sister over to watch tv with him. It took quite a while for my sister to realize that he thought they were "dating". It's kind of cute, really.
haha. my istj roommate described this scenario as his ideal date.
 

Giggly

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Mine is a mix between the not very subtle, "well, we should just be in the hot tub already" or "I think me and you need to be cuddling, let's go" and extreme teasing which leads to criticism. There's a certain girl that sets off all of my emotions but it is completely off limits. She knows I like her and our conversations turn into constantly criticizing her. I can't help it.

I flirt but don't take it further than that. I'm not much into dating. I just don't get the point. I'd rather find a hobby to invest time into than spend time on a date with someone that I barely know. It's weighing the amount of fun of each. Conversing with a stranger that I'm only sexually attracted to and likely share little common interests with is about as interesting as poking a skunk with a stick. I'd rather do my own thing and just wait to see if a relationship evolves spontaneously and naturally.

Dating someone you like can be fun too, Raz. You should give it a try. :)
 

raz

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Dating someone you like can be fun too, Raz. You should give it a try. :)

Hard to give it a try when I can't even figure out how to maintain conversations with people in real life long enough to spark interest past physical attraction. I suck at maintaining conversations past 2-3 sentences and don't really glide through it like a lot of people. I'm just not a naturally social person. It makes me wonder if relationships just aren't for me. ><

I had one date last year, but it was to a fair that cost me $75, and it was with a girl I had known for 1 1/2 years. That's why it just takes me a while to establish the friendship then escalate to relationship. I just need that friendship foundation and trust before I can start putting faith into the romantic attraction and take that leap. Hence why ISTJs are slow. I want stability in the relationship.
 

Giggly

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Well, I understand needing time to get to know someone, but, I dunno, you seem quite chatty to me for an ISTJ. Maybe you don't give yourself enough credit.
 

raz

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It's just that I wait a while wanting to get to know someone before dating and I don't intentionally meet people with the intention of getting to know them, so my number of dates is next to zilch, plus a lot of women are screwed up in that if you wait too long past friendship to do anything, they're like, "OH SHIT, Cosmo said to knock this guy in the friend zone after a month, GOODBYE CHANCES OF DATING."
 

Giggly

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^Well, you do have to be ready to date so I won't force you.
 

Donna Cecilia

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It's just that I wait a while wanting to get to know someone before dating and I don't intentionally meet people with the intention of getting to know them, so my number of dates is next to zilch, plus a lot of women are screwed up in that if you wait too long past friendship to do anything, they're like, "OH SHIT, Cosmo said to knock this guy in the friend zone after a month, GOODBYE CHANCES OF DATING."

Cosmo is awful on the "relationship advice" department.

I buy it only for the makeup looks and the sex advice (which is something in which they are really good)
 

raz

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Cosmo is awful on the "relationship advice" department.

I buy it only for the makeup looks and the sex advice (which is something in which they are really good)

I just mean so many girls that just follow what the average girl, their friends, magazines, tv or whatever does. It seems those type of girls are the majority.
 

Giggly

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raz, I'm not really sure what exactly you expect from girls.
 

Donna Cecilia

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That has nothing to do with type.

Just avoid the "average girl places" such as malls, or clubs.

Have you tried meeting girls at cafés, museums, art exhibits, seminars, conferences, philanthropic or cultural events?

Those are places for people who are above average. And my favourites when it comes to meet guys. The seminars have the major advantage of gathering people who share your interests, giving you a good starting point for any conversation.
 

Parsimony

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I rarely flirt and feel uncomfortable when others do that to me. The only time I would feel comfortable to do so is when I'm already dating/in relationship with that person. :blush:
 
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