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  1. #1
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    Default Why Do You Hate Change?

    A story from an ISTJ:
    "I volunteer for a non-profit. Recently the director I had worked with for over 7 years had retired. This past Monday was my first day working with the new director. Over the prior weekend she had expanded the office space to an adjoining section of the building and rearranged everything. Not only did I have to adjust to a new boss, I was blind-sided with a different environment. My personal life is stressful and often overwhelming so my volunteering at this office is my only constant. I know exactly what I will be doing, I know what is expected of me and I am secure in my environment due to knowing where everything is. So, back to Monday. I walk in, see the changes and I am furious. I feel alienated, disrespected because there wasn't any heads up about the planned changes and completely unsettled. Apparently I am the only volunteer unhappy with the changes. I believe I had a justifiable response to the situation, but in between the lines of my resulting conversation with the director, it appears my reaction is being reduced to immature hostility. I don't go off all crazy when I'm pissed, I do the quietly restrained thing while I am clenching my jaw. She did actually say I was hostile towards her. I disagree since I was courteous and respectful towards her the few times she talked to me prior to our closed door conversation. Am I so wrong I should apologize or should I be worried about being pushed out."

    I think we've all seen the "quietly restrained jaw-clenching" routine from ISTJs. It's that look that makes me want to just punch them in the face.

    The fact that only one person out of, say, 20 people is reacting to the change doesn't matter. You think it's all about you.

    And the lack of respect toward you. Oh my! We can't have that.

    "I believe I had a justifiable response to the situation." And what was that? Uhhhhh...

    Get over it and apologize, you silly git.
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  2. #2
    Senior Member Smilephantomhive's Avatar
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    ISTJs don't hate all change, just change that's inconvientent to them.


    johari
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  3. #3
    Softserve Ice Cream Agent Washington's Avatar
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    ???? ??? why post this here
    There's no love in fear.
    - Tool

    Do we want to remind you of something? Yes: the world is good and we belong here.
    - Richard Siken
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  4. #4
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    Quote Originally Posted by Smilephantomhive View Post
    ISTJs don't hate all change, just change that's inconvientent to them.
    There's no point in qualifying it like that. It's an Si trait to dislike change. And it's circular logic to pinpoint only the inconvenient changes, as in 'ISTJs dislike inconvenient changes.'

    The same is true for ESTJ or ESFJ types, although in their case it has to do with making unapproved changes and not just the inconvenient ones. One day my mom decided to change the living room furniture around, and of course when my dad got home from work he was all pissed off about it.

    In my case (INTP or IxTP, however you want to slice and dice me), I would have to ask why the change was made. I want to know the purpose of it. Si doesn't want to know why, in my experience, but only wants to complain about showing a lack of respect or not following rules, and things like that.

  5. #5
    Senior Member Smilephantomhive's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mal12345 View Post
    There's no point in qualifying it like that. It's an Si trait to dislike change. And it's circular logic to pinpoint only the inconvenient changes, as in 'ISTJs dislike inconvenient changes.'

    The same is true for ESTJ or ESFJ types, although in their case it has to do with making unapproved changes and not just the inconvenient ones. One day my mom decided to change the living room furniture around, and of course when my dad got home from work he was all pissed off about it.

    In my case (INTP or IxTP, however you want to slice and dice me), I would have to ask why the change was made. I want to know the purpose of it. Si doesn't want to know why, in my experience, but only wants to complain about showing a lack of respect or not following rules, and things like that.
    I do want to why.


    johari
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    Quote Originally Posted by Smilephantomhive View Post
    I do want to why.
    Of course you do...

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    Senior Member Smilephantomhive's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mal12345 View Post
    Of course you do...
    Of course you think I don't lol...


    johari
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  8. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by Smilephantomhive View Post
    Of course you think I don't lol...
    Everybody asks why. The question is, why don't ISTJs ask why at certain times? I guess because yelling and bickering is more fulfilling an activity.

  9. #9
    Softserve Ice Cream Agent Washington's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mal12345 View Post
    Everybody asks why. The question is, why don't ISTJs ask why at certain times? I guess because yelling and bickering is more fulfilling an activity.
    An ISTJ peed in your cheerios??
    There's no love in fear.
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  10. #10
    Dream without Hesitation Dreamer's Avatar
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    The scenario you present actually makes perfect sense to me and is a reasonable course of action, from her perspective. Where I see the issue though for the ISTJ, is that she is blending her emotions together and allowing that ball of mess to spin her thoughts into supposed attacks on her by everyone else, since they apparently don't share in her anxiety over the changes.

    If she were to identify her volunteering job stresses as a different entity, and separate them from her other, personal life stresses, then she could therefore process and rationalize these emotions differently. She may still bring her concerns forward, and that's reasonable, but they may not include that added narrative of people being against her at that point.

    So, my read of the situation is that she is not actually concerned with the change itself, but that messy ball of emotions she is trying to contain inside. She has only attached those emotions to the change in her environment and is reacting to that directly as that is the straw the broke her back.

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