ISFJ guy here, thought I'd add some thoughts...
okay so heres the deal. i have a huge crush to this girl who's boyfriend is most likely an isfj.i was late on telling her about my feelings(as usual) and i told her about my feelings the next day i heard that they started dating, things(me) got messy for about 10 months and this time i didnt see neither of them(by my choice), but i texted to this girl for some time after that and i later heard that the guy got pretty jealous. the guy left the country for about 2 months and in that time i started hanging out in same group(she is friend of about all of my real friends) again. now the guy is back and doesent want me around, because some time ago before he left the country my friend accidentally invited him to same place that i was going to and i told my friend to tell him not to come or i wont come, so my friend told him that he cant come. he said to this friend of mine that he is pissed off at me because i didnt want him to come there. but the reason that i didnt want him to come was because i didnt want anything to do with this girl back then.
(Emphasis mine)
Firstly, right of the bat, I need to make you aware of something. I don't know if other ISFJ males are like this but I know I am and it's possible that this guy is as well BUT when it comes to relationships (and indeed a great many other things) we have "codes of conduct", rules of behavior that we believe are "appropriate" and that govern ourselves by. One of these said rules is that when a woman that I am interested in begins dating or is with someone,
I show no romantic interest in her AT ALL. Reason being? It's
rude. To me it is inappropriate to try and "steal" someone else's girlfriend as that is an insult to her and to the gentleman in question.
Conversely, when I am with someone, I consider it a personal insult when a guy
that is fully aware of my relationship with this woman tries to make a move on to her. As such, it sounds to me like you just made one
HELL of a bad impression with this dude as you made the (idiotic) mistake of deciding to tell this girl how you felt about her the day after you found out they were dating. Even if that wasn't your intent, I think that's probably what it was construed as on his side.
Either way, bad form dude, bad form!
Now then, in response to the rest of the paragraph: It
could be that he's jealous
or it could something more mundane, that he was being truthful, and he just plain doesn't like you. You telling your friend at the social event that if "he comes then I won't" just added a load of fuel to the fire. Honestly, I think he just doesn't like you (if I were in his situation, *I* wouldn't like you a whole hell of a lot either).
i dont know what he has told the reason is to this girl, but what he told to my friend sounds like bullshit excuse to me and i bet he is just jealous.
He very well could be. Being that he travels outside the country
and considering your feelings toward his woman
and how poorly things have developed thus far, I know *I* would be concerned. Not about her, mind you, but about YOU.
so my question is that is this guy really that sensitive and retarded or is he just using this as an excuse keeping me away from his girlfriend?
In my humble opinion he just doesn't like you and is unfortunately forgetting that it's not really
his choice as to whether or not she hangs out with you,
it's hers. It sounds to me like the lady whose found herself caught in the middle of this needs to bitch-smack the both of you because you're both making an ass of yourselves.
also if this is an excuse i wonder if he is telling this bullshit to this girl also to control the situation while hide his insecurities. or to make this a valid question, would isfj's hide their insecurities from their SO and try to manipulate situations like this?
To the first part: It could be, and see my answer about
To your question: Depending on the quality of the relationship, I know I will hide my insecurities at first as I'm deathly afraid that if I do, I'll ruin the relationship before it takes off. Could I be manipulative in the fashion that this guy has been? Sure, I wouldn't put it past me, but I would hope that the woman I chose to be with would see this mound of horseshit for what it is and would beat the stuffing out of me so being so stupid.
Bottom line: I think he's acting like an idiot as he has no right to tell his girlfriend who she can and can not hang out with and you're acting like an idiot as you have to accept that this her boyfriend, HER MAN, and that if you want her to still be in your life then you need to dislodge your head from your Andy-Kaufman-hindparts and accept the unfun truth that he's going to have to be a part of it as well.
Myq question to you now is: Where do you want things to go from here? Do you still wish to remain friends with her so long as she is with him? If so, then it would be in your best interest to try and smooth things over with this guy as something you need to consider is that this lady friend of yours could have very serious feelings for him and your continued antagonism toward him could end up damaging your friendship with her, possibly even ending it.
If however you can not see yourself getting past any ill feelings toward him or if the idea of continuing to have to deal with him is unpleasant, then I hope you can accept the potential consequences that I mentioned above.
I hope I provided some insight, if you have any questions, let me know.
). i dont understand why you think im trying to make it seem that she would be with me if she wasnt with him, because even i dont believe it, im pretty sure i blew this thing even if she used to be interested. but like a tapeworm said, its good to live in Hope 
INTP
