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[ISFJ] Where my ISFJs at?

coldbluewaves

New member
Joined
Apr 8, 2009
Messages
20
MBTI Type
ISFJ
Dansker said:
I like ISFJs. Practical, responsible, quiet and loyal.

This is more or less my problem. Apparently i'm an ISFJ/INFJ (but i actually identify more with ISFJ than INFJ, so probably more ISFJ) but that just screams boring to me. =/

I think people like ISFJ's 'cause of that, but they're more a person to keep around (because they're loyal and will have your back, i suppose), not a person to be great friends with ('cause they're not "fun"), or they're someone who you settle down with once you're, say 30-35, and looking for marriage and someone you can count on. IDK. I don't like the idea of that, therefore i like to believe that i am not one, but.. a lot of the things that ISFJs stand for seem to ring true for me, too, and i get it on the quizzes, and such (the people who have/had a somewhat good idea of what/who i am seem(ed) to believe i am), so, i'm not really sure. A good friend of mine seems to think i am one, too. Would an ISFJ think like i'm thinking here?

I spend a lot of time on the internet and forums, too, btw, and reading this thread (the first couple pages at least, so far) apparently ISFJs don't (?), so that's probably further reason to doubt that i'm one. Heh. :doh:
 

Saslou

New member
Joined
Feb 1, 2009
Messages
4,910
MBTI Type
ESFJ
This is more or less my problem. Apparently i'm an ISFJ/INFJ (but i actually identify more with ISFJ than INFJ, so probably more ISFJ) but that just screams boring to me. =/

I think people like ISFJ's 'cause of that, but they're more a person to keep around (because they're loyal and will have your back, i suppose), not a person to be great friends with ('cause they're not "fun"), or they're someone who you settle down with once you're, say 30-35, and looking for marriage and someone you can count on. IDK. I don't like the idea of that, therefore i like to believe that i am not one, but.. a lot of the things that ISFJs stand for seem to ring true for me, too, and i get it on the quizzes, and such (the people who have/had a somewhat good idea of what/who i am seem(ed) to believe i am), so, i'm not really sure. A good friend of mine seems to think i am one, too. Would an ISFJ think like i'm thinking here?

I spend a lot of time on the internet and forums, too, btw, and reading this thread (the first couple pages at least, so far) apparently ISFJs don't (?), so that's probably further reason to doubt that i'm one. Heh. :doh:

I disagree with your theory .. i can understand why you think WE would be boring .. but if either of us organised a day out, i promise the other would have fun .. yeah we do make good friends and we are dependable, loyal (dont say it like it's a bad thing, to drop everything and see to a friend, be it just a shoulder to cry on .. we are there) .. I dont believe i am an ISFJ and retook the test and came out a ESFJ and i am still not happy.. it doesnt matter what initials i get .. all i know is i am a protector/guardian .. the minor details are not relevant .. You are right, we are not supposed to spend a lot of time on the internet and interacting .. just shows "they" might try and fit all of us into a box, but it just can't be done .. We each have different life experiences and thought/emotion processes that makes all slightly individual and unique ..

Hope that helps ..
 

digesthisickness

✿ڿڰۣஇღ♥ wut ♥ღஇڿڰۣ✿
Joined
Apr 24, 2007
Messages
3,248
MBTI Type
ENTP
I disagree with your theory .. i can understand why you think WE would be boring .. but if either of us organised a day out, i promise the other would have fun .. yeah we do make good friends and we are dependable, loyal (dont say it like it's a bad thing, to drop everything and see to a friend, be it just a shoulder to cry on .. we are there) .. I dont believe i am an ISFJ and retook the test and came out a ESFJ and i am still not happy.. it doesnt matter what initials i get .. all i know is i am a protector/guardian .. the minor details are not relevant .. You are right, we are not supposed to spend a lot of time on the internet and interacting .. just shows "they" might try and fit all of us into a box, but it just can't be done .. We each have different life experiences and thought/emotion processes that makes all slightly individual and unique ..

Hope that helps ..

my ISFJ friend would plan an outing specifically with 'exciting' in mind if i, or another of her friends, mentioned needing one with that agenda.

while usually she has a smile on her face and makes bad jokes (knowing they're bad and old, but that's what makes 'em funny), she can be boring when she's stressed. hoo boy. but, because she has so many other things going for her friend-wise, i stuck it out. because i stuck it out, i eventually figured out why and when she gets that way, and that makes a lot of difference in how i handle it.

she gets very redundant, complains a lot, tics off lists of things she has done or needs to do more than once, comes to wrong conclusions based on very little (which is really hard for me not to argue about, but i keep it inside - unless it goes overboard and gets way too personal, which is rare), and stresses way too much about minutiae.

now, while 99% of the time, that drives me insane as i can't stand when someone repeats themselves over and over, i've come to realize that this is just a calming mechanism for her, it makes her feel better. so, instead of getting annoyed, like i used to, and like i usually do with others, i look over it (since she's such a great friend otherwise), and 'ride it out'. usually, by thinking about something else when she gets in 'repeat' mode, so that it's not as painful.

once she feels heard, and/or just gets these things off of her chest without being interrupted, she's right back to her old self.

when compared to all the pluses she (and my other ISFJ friends who are very similar to her) brings to our friendship, those times that require my patience and biting my tongue are totally worth it.
 

Eiddy

Pronounced eye-ee-dee
Joined
Apr 20, 2009
Messages
757
MBTI Type
DEAD
Enneagram
1w2
Yikes I can see parts of myself in this, repetition wise. I used to complain a lot about many things, but I try to see the benefits of an otherwise losing situation. Hey, I am learning from it, but I have noticed now instead of talking, I get physical symptoms instead, migraines or ibs. Luckily that is rarely, it used to be a few times a week. Guess it was that imaginary sense of control I was seeking, I'm learning to counteract it with things that go against my personality; quit expecting too much, be absent from work at least twice a year, eat something. hahaha

But for having fun. I am totally game, skydiving, rollerblading, sports motorcycling, roller coasters, ok sometimes it has to be more like Need For Speed. All the more dangerous, all the more exciting. Boring not in the least unless we are in a bad mood, because the house is a mess all of the time.

*Mr. Incredible: "No matter how many times you save the world, it always manages to get back in jeopardy again. Sometimes I just want it to stay saved! You know, for a little bit? I feel like the maid; I just cleaned up this mess! Can we keep it clean for... for ten minutes!"

*Quote from IMDB
 

Saslou

New member
Joined
Feb 1, 2009
Messages
4,910
MBTI Type
ESFJ
Yikes I can see parts of myself in this, repetition wise. I used to complain a lot about many things, but I try to see the benefits of an otherwise losing situation. Hey, I am learning from it, but I have noticed now instead of talking, I get physical symptoms instead, migraines or ibs. Luckily that is rarely, it used to be a few times a week. Guess it was that imaginary sense of control I was seeking, I'm learning to counteract it with things that go against my personality; quit expecting too much, be absent from work at least twice a year, eat something. hahaha

But for having fun. I am totally game, skydiving, rollerblading, sports motorcycling, roller coasters, ok sometimes it has to be more like Need For Speed. All the more dangerous, all the more exciting. Boring not in the least unless we are in a bad mood, because the house is a mess all of the time.

*Mr. Incredible: "No matter how many times you save the world, it always manages to get back in jeopardy again. Sometimes I just want it to stay saved! You know, for a little bit? I feel like the maid; I just cleaned up this mess! Can we keep it clean for... for ten minutes!"

*Quote from IMDB

Yes i do complain .. but that's only because i am pissed off that i am unable to fix the problem or situation, think i am a control freak .. lol .. or just an xSFJ .. i will have a conversation over in my head a million times when i am stressed or just worked up about something .. It helps me find meaning and understand .. It seems we can be the most annoying of people and yet the the most kindest and loyal .. Oh well, each to their own :)
 

Eiddy

Pronounced eye-ee-dee
Joined
Apr 20, 2009
Messages
757
MBTI Type
DEAD
Enneagram
1w2
Oh so very true, no one needs to get it all out of their system like we do. I know I can go over all the misdeeds done during a situation and even though I know I am right (the ISFJ talking here) I still have to talk it all out. lol

Even though I can let the situation pass and pretend everything is all right it's hard to totally let it go. I think I have an internal tally system going on, but there is a good thing about this all. It takes a lot and I mean a lot to push me over the edge. ;)

I think this is the real negative trait that can be seen. I don't know if it is the same for ESFj.

Don't mean to hijack this thread, but Dave. We really are the most peaceful, loyal persons you can find and we are very low maintenance. A peace of string and some knitting needles can keep us entertained for hours. hahaha
 

Saslou

New member
Joined
Feb 1, 2009
Messages
4,910
MBTI Type
ESFJ
Oh so very true, no one needs to get it all out of their system like we do. I know I can go over all the misdeeds done during a situation and even though I know I am right (the ISFJ talking here) I still have to talk it all out. lol

Even though I can let the situation pass and pretend everything is all right it's hard to totally let it go. I think I have an internal tally system going on, but there is a good thing about this all. It takes a lot and I mean a lot to push me over the edge. ;)

I think this is the real negative trait that can be seen. I don't know if it is the same for ESFj.

Don't mean to hijack this thread, but Dave. We really are the most peaceful, loyal persons you can find and we are very low maintenance. A peace of string and some knitting needles can keep us entertained for hours. hahaha

As an E/ISFJ .. i will second that ... all of it
 

iwakar

crush the fences
Joined
May 2, 2007
Messages
4,877
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
Schedule a tea party to wrangle the ladies. As for the gents? I haven't a clue.
 

digesthisickness

✿ڿڰۣஇღ♥ wut ♥ღஇڿڰۣ✿
Joined
Apr 24, 2007
Messages
3,248
MBTI Type
ENTP
Oh so very true, no one needs to get it all out of their system like we do. I know I can go over all the misdeeds done during a situation and even though I know I am right (the ISFJ talking here) I still have to talk it all out. lol

Even though I can let the situation pass and pretend everything is all right it's hard to totally let it go. I think I have an internal tally system going on, but there is a good thing about this all. It takes a lot and I mean a lot to push me over the edge. ;)

I think this is the real negative trait that can be seen. I don't know if it is the same for ESFj.

Don't mean to hijack this thread, but Dave. We really are the most peaceful, loyal persons you can find and we are very low maintenance. A peace of string and some knitting needles can keep us entertained for hours. hahaha

so true. there have been so many times that i've wondered if i could be far too easily replaced in a minute by a chihuahua.
 

Eiddy

Pronounced eye-ee-dee
Joined
Apr 20, 2009
Messages
757
MBTI Type
DEAD
Enneagram
1w2
Hmm, that's a thought I sometimes go through about the people in my life. Actually a pet rock might be easier for me to take care of. lol How does that saying go? It's like the words fall upon wooden ears...?
 

Giggly

No moss growing on me
Joined
Jun 12, 2008
Messages
9,661
MBTI Type
iSFj
Enneagram
2
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
Have we found out where all the ISFJ's are yet?
 

kätzchen0812

New member
Joined
May 29, 2009
Messages
5
MBTI Type
ISFP
I'm ISFJ- my friend (INFJ) recently showed me MTBI and just now this website. I'm very thankful that it exists :) Learning about my type made me understand why I do what I do and now I'm more accepting of myself because of it
 

Eiddy

Pronounced eye-ee-dee
Joined
Apr 20, 2009
Messages
757
MBTI Type
DEAD
Enneagram
1w2
Welcome Kat,

First post! So glad to have another ISFJ around.

Send me a message anytime. I'm off for the summer :D

Sara
 

raz

Let's make this showy!
Joined
Nov 11, 2008
Messages
2,523
MBTI Type
LoLz
I ran into a girl at the checkout at a grocery store that SEEMED ISFJ, but not sure. She had the same exact phone as me, same color. She was asking me where I got the cover I had on it, how much it was and where she could get one. I'm just thinking in the grocery stores, those lone, content, coordinated and friendly women are the ISFJs of the crowd.
 

INTPatricia

New member
Joined
Jun 7, 2009
Messages
65
MBTI Type
intj
Yeah, i am here to read about the isfj in my life. Even if I could get him to read this, he would never post. :) At present he is in India taking care of an ailing family member and, in general being a wonderful son and brother to them now.
 
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