[MBTI General] ISTJs Explained By ISTJs: Post your questions here!

[Rainne]

I've often wondered what an ISTJ would see in an ESTP as a SO... I'm secretly convinced that he's the one who has everything going for him on that front and I'm like a pet puppy or something

/pats puppy

 

[garbage]

It's because you're useless. Nothing personal against you.
...
I'd only do it because my job forces me to. I'd do it otherwise if you're a close friend. Otherwise, I'm not assisting you with your incompetence without reimbursement.

Okay, now I've got a question.

Why do you fail to see or appreciate the value in approaches and mindsets that differ from your own?

I mean, I know it's a loaded question, but the underlying assertion that there is value in nonlinear, "big-picture" approaches is one that doesn't really need to be defended. At least, I hope it doesn't.

 

[raz]

Okay, now I've got a question.

Why do you fail to see or appreciate the value in approaches and mindsets that differ from your own?

I mean, I know it's a loaded question, but the underlying assertion that there is value in nonlinear, "big-picture" approaches is one that doesn't really need to be defended. At least, I hope it doesn't.

There's no reason to not do something if it's ineffective. If a different approach works and is practical, then do it, but why change approaches just for the sake of changing approaches? You have to be gaining something by changing your approach or viewpoint. Change shouldn't come with solely a negative cost.

If I'm working with someone and they don't understand something, the end goal makes up for my impatience with having to slow down and explain something to someone "scatterbrained" or having to deal with a scatterbrained person in general. It's still not about accepting another point of view, it's about the goal.

I generally see people who are scatterbrained or incapable of focusing as lazy. It's their choice to act as they are acting. I have my own internal compass to guide me through structure and guidelines, accepting opposite points of view and remaining objective with Te, seeing the big picture with Ne, and being able to separate the structure from natural human behavior with Fi. My life focuses on and admires systems. I'm equipped to handle them, and others who are not, I quickly become patronizing toward. It's how I've always been.

 

[Ozz]

Okay, now I've got a question.

Why do you fail to see or appreciate the value in approaches and mindsets that differ from your own?

I mean, I know it's a loaded question, but the underlying assertion that there is value in nonlinear, "big-picture" approaches is one that doesn't really need to be defended. At least, I hope it doesn't.

I rather not trade a known to be working approach for a possible but risky approach. Of course, I do respond well to logical persuasions (eg. emphasize the negative aspect of the current approach and explain how the new one would fix it).

 

[Betty Blue]

I've often wondered what an ISTJ would see in an ESTP as a SO... I'm secretly convinced that he's the one who has everything going for him on that front and I'm like a pet puppy or something

Thats funny. I have that same feeling. Although i do actually have quite a lot going on for myself and even my SO refers to me as intelligent. Still i often feel like i am an assistant or "pet" as you mentioned. He even pats me on the head or back at times. I wonder if this is felt by many SO's of ISTJ's???

ISTJ's how do you feel about this?

 

[IZthe411]

Thats funny. I have that same feeling. Although i do actually have quite a lot going on for myself and even my SO refers to me as intelligent. Still i often feel like i am an assistant or "pet" as you mentioned. He even pats me on the head or back at times. I wonder if this is felt by many SO's of ISTJ's???

ISTJ's how do you feel about this?

That's affection. We SUCK at it!


I'll be honest with yall; the hardest thing for me to do is show affection that's not sexual. Sounds harsh, yes.

It's something that I work at and some days are better than others.

Affection is even hard to show for my family members. It takes a lot for me to say "I Love you"

 

[Lady_X]

i did not feel like a pet...but a child somewhat yeah. :/

 

[IZthe411]

i did not feel like a pet...but a child somewhat yeah. :/

If you had to describe the SJ males ways, they are fatherly.

 

[miss fortune]

Thats funny. I have that same feeling. Although i do actually have quite a lot going on for myself and even my SO refers to me as intelligent. Still i often feel like i am an assistant or "pet" as you mentioned. He even pats me on the head or back at times. I wonder if this is felt by many SO's of ISTJ's???

ISTJ's how do you feel about this?

mine claims that I have all kinds of things going for me (including being a "first rate brilliant nerd" )... He's just so self sufficient and driven that I occasionally get the sneaking suspicion that I'm just kind of a pet girl... someone who's kept around for the sake of pleasure instead of having any necissary qualities... and yes, I occasionally get patted on the head or back

That's affection. We SUCK at it!


I'll be honest with yall; the hardest thing for me to do is show affection that's not sexual. Sounds harsh, yes.

It's something that I work at and some days are better than others.

Affection is even hard to show for my family members. It takes a lot for me to say "I Love you"

I had to learn that he expresses it through being helpful and doing little things for me and by physical contact... certainly not by skipping across the room and planting a kiss on my forehead or anything

 

[IZthe411]

mine claims that I have all kinds of things going for me (including being a "first rate brilliant nerd" )... He's just so self sufficient and driven that I occasionally get the sneaking suspicion that I'm just kind of a pet girl... someone who's kept around for the sake of pleasure instead of having any necissary qualities... and yes, I occasionally get patted on the head or back



I had to learn that he expresses it through being helpful and doing little things for me and by physical contact... certainly not by skipping across the room and planting a kiss on my forehead or anything

I betta be high on something more than weed if I ever skip and kiss on a forehead

 

[Lady_X]

haha does anyone do that?!

 

[Rainne]

Hi ISTJs.

If you have a problem with someone, and you are in no position to challenge or change them, would you confront them or complain behind their backs?

 

[miss fortune]

haha does anyone do that?!

:hi: when in a good mood I certainly will!

Hi ISTJs.

If you have a problem with someone, and you are in no position to challenge or change them, would you confront them or complain behind their backs?

mine is quite upfront about it... in the most unassuming way possible

 

[Lady_X]

haha...i guess you're right. a type 7 most certainly will be all giddy and affectionate when in a good mood yes.

was just thinking...i've never seen anyone do that...haha

 

[IZthe411]

Hi ISTJs.

If you have a problem with someone, and you are in no position to challenge or change them, would you confront them or complain behind their backs?

Complain most likely, but it depends on the situation. At work, I'll try to challenge them in ways I can, but if it's to no avail, I'll leave it alone and complain, meaning I'll probably tell others about my trials, and struggles, and look for a common suffering. The complaining isn't based on feelings, most of the time it's based on concrete, justifiable evidence that is wrong in my eyes.

ISTJs are not the ones to head on confront someone without thinking it out first. So to confront someone with words takes a level of building up towards it. I will say the more comfortable I am with someone the more upfront I am.

 

[garbage]

There's no reason to not do something if it's ineffective. If a different approach works and is practical, then do it, but why change approaches just for the sake of changing approaches? You have to be gaining something by changing your approach or viewpoint. Change shouldn't come with solely a negative cost.

I think we can all agree that negative changes are bad and should be avoided.

If I'm working with someone and they don't understand something, the end goal makes up for my impatience with having to slow down and explain something to someone "scatterbrained" or having to deal with a scatterbrained person in general. It's still not about accepting another point of view, it's about the goal.

I generally see people who are scatterbrained or incapable of focusing as lazy. It's their choice to act as they are acting. I have my own internal compass to guide me through structure and guidelines, accepting opposite points of view and remaining objective with Te, seeing the big picture with Ne, and being able to separate the structure from natural human behavior with Fi. My life focuses on and admires systems. I'm equipped to handle them, and others who are not, I quickly become patronizing toward. It's how I've always been.

Except that equating "scatterbrained" with full-out "incompetence" and "uselessness" is just plain narrow-minded.

In fact, I often find that I have to slow down in order to repackage--linearize--my thoughts so that linear-thinkers can understand me. I don't have that issue with those who are "scatterbrained" like myself--they grasp what I say pretty readily because they can make the same sort of connections that I can, know where the conversation is headed and subconsciously anticipate that, and don't need the details to be filled in.

Like you, though, I tolerate having to repackage my thoughts when it's necessary to do so.

It's interesting that this particular issue is two-sided, as it is.

 

[Betty Blue]

haha...i guess you're right. a type 7 most certainly will be all giddy and affectionate when in a good mood yes.

was just thinking...i've never seen anyone do that...haha

Haha, i would so skip across the room and plant a big kiss on his forehead! It's a very me thing to do. I think i even do that to friends.
My SO's response would be slightly awkward though. Maybe a sharp breath and an uncomfortable "Okaaay" uttered. Followed by a question about something boringly practical like computer virus protection.

 

[Vasilisa]

ISTJs, would you mind posting your opinions on the following unrelated topics:
sports and greeting cards

Thanks

 

[IZthe411]

ISTJs, would you mind posting your opinions on the following unrelated topics:
sports and greeting cards

Thanks

A sports greeting card would be lovely! LOL

Okay bad joke.

But I love sports. I love playing over watching. I only really like to watch Pro football. I'm 50/50 on basketball (watching & playing) and I don't play baseball but attending the games are a good time.

I'm very active in sports. Growing up in the hood, b-ball was the only game most guys would play. In the fall we'd play football but even then you bballed. Now I play tennis, volleyball, walleyball, in addition to bball and football. My thing is as long as I'm breaking a sweat and being active I'm game to play.

I haven't gotten into golf yet.


Greeting cards? Meh.
They are nice I guess, but they don't really do it for me. I did learn through my last girl that that little gesture goes a long way, so in my next relationship I'll send more. Prior to that I wouldn't have thought to visit the greeting card section unless somebody was born, died, got married, or graduated.

 

[Sam Spade]

sports and greeting cards

Dislike both.