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[ESTJ] Ask an ESTJ!

WickedQueen

New member
Joined
Jun 11, 2009
Messages
183
MBTI Type
ESTJ
Enneagram
3w4
If someone in your inner circle were to surprise you by doing something nice for you, what would it be?

I don't really like surprise, actually.


Are you the only SJ in your family? Was it difficult having two N parents?

No, my brother is SJ. Having two N parents? Hmm... never thought about that. I guess not, they would help me developing my N.


How do you celebrate birthdays? Do you like to have traditions that carry on?

I have no birthday tradition. But I remember I love to celebrating birthday by myself or with some close friends.


If you were mad at someone, would they know it?

Yes, definitely. I will make them notice that I'm angry and why.


What kinds of things disappoint you?

Broken promises and bullshit.


If you were picking out a new car, what features would take priority? Style? Brand? Public perception? Economy?...

Red Ferrari.


Do you tend to keep in touch with people who do not live in the same place as you?

If they were my close friends, yes I will. But not regularly.


How do you feel about talking on the telephone?

What's wrong with that?


.
 

BlackCat

Shaman
Joined
Nov 19, 2008
Messages
7,038
MBTI Type
ESFP
Enneagram
9w8
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
Here is a question that has been answered before by you (EJCC) to me, but I figure that the rest of the community would be interested in hearing this also and WickedQueen could also answer.

It's pretty much a forum fad that ESTJs and INFPs don't really get along, but I disagree with that. I know that there is hope for these two types to get along. It depends majorly on the people involved, but type still is a factor here.

So here's the question, how do you ESTJs think that INFP-ESTJ relations can be improved? Most of the issues seem to be with communication I've noticed, and that the two people will seem totally foreign to each other. Etc.

Broad question I know (I apologize)... But one that I'm sure a lot of people want answered.
 

EJCC

The Devil of TypoC
Joined
Aug 29, 2008
Messages
19,129
MBTI Type
ESTJ
Enneagram
1w9
Instinctual Variant
sp/so
My copied-and-pasted answer from earlier is below:

Miscommunication is definitely a problem between ESTJs and INFPs, since INFPs are one of the most dreamy types, and ESTJs are probably the most grounded in reality, in my experience. They just live in completely different worlds.

I'm not sure how I would make relations with ESTJs easier. I get the feeling that ESTJs aren't as aware of what makes INFPs so different, so they don't realize that they actually need to WORK at the friendship, not go blindly into it. So usually with bad ESTJ-INFP relationships, the ESTJ would be at fault for being so inherently relationship-stupid.

Now, I think I'm kind of an exception here (not to the relationship-stupid thing - that describes me pretty well too), because for some reason almost all of my friends are N, so I'm used to being on a different wavelength from them. Also, most of my N friends are introverted, so with them I make sure that I give them some space. INFJs especially - if they've got something going on and won't talk to me about it, I've learned to walk away. But I'm guessing that most ESTJs haven't had the experience that I've had with dreamy INxx's, so they wouldn't necessarily know what's expected. Also they wouldn't know that it's OKAY to have no effing clue how their minds work! You can still be friendly if they make zero sense to you. (My relationship with an ENTP friend is a good example of this - I've known her for years, and I still don't understand her AT ALL.)

Besides that, I guess - well, I was reading an article a while back about how whever there are problems in a relationship with one person getting angry about small things that the other person does, then the solution is not to stop the small things from happening; the solution is to get over it. That's the way they are. I know that many INFPs hate ESTJs just for being so status quo, and for "trying to force their beliefs on other people". I know that based on my limited experience with INFPs, I don't like how incredibly inaccurate they can be, and how they can seem so intellectual and hyperarticulate and still frickin' pronounce "nuclear" like "nook-yoo-lurr"!!! But if ESTJs and INFPs can just learn to ACCEPT the annoying qualities of the other, then I have no doubt that relationships between them would go smoother. (That's WAY harder than it sounds, since they're both stubborn types based on my experience, but I'm speaking hypothetically.)
 

runvardh

にゃん
Joined
Jun 23, 2007
Messages
8,541
MBTI Type
INFP
Enneagram
6w7
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
Off topic:

... still frickin' pronounce "nuclear" like "nook-yoo-lurr"!!!

My dad does this and it annoys the shit out of me; especailly after years of carpal to cranial impacts for misspronouncing words, myself.

On topic: Us INFPs could handle stating WTF is wrong instead of waiting for the other to assume what's wrong as well.
 

EJCC

The Devil of TypoC
Joined
Aug 29, 2008
Messages
19,129
MBTI Type
ESTJ
Enneagram
1w9
Instinctual Variant
sp/so
On topic: Us INFPs could handle stating WTF is wrong instead of waiting for the other to assume what's wrong as well.

Good :) I wasn't sure, considering the fear of conflict thing. But that would be helpful, probably - I'm guessing that out of the two types, INFPs would be quicker to understand what's wrong.
 

entropie

Permabanned
Joined
Apr 24, 2008
Messages
16,767
MBTI Type
entp
Enneagram
783
It hasnt to come THAT far ! There is always an entp to marry for at least 2-3 weeks in the first place :D

So back to the topic on ESTJs having sex with me !

Whom do I need to bribe ? :D
 

WickedQueen

New member
Joined
Jun 11, 2009
Messages
183
MBTI Type
ESTJ
Enneagram
3w4
So here's the question, how do you ESTJs think that INFP-ESTJ relations can be improved? Most of the issues seem to be with communication I've noticed, and that the two people will seem totally foreign to each other. Etc.

I have an INFP bestfriend. We rolling eyes a lot for each other when we're together, but...

I help her make up her mind and she teach me how to treat other person with heart (not just with head).

I talk and she listen. She talk and I (force myself to) listen.

She laugh at my jokes and she throw me with socks if I didn't laugh at her jokes.

I hug her when she cries and she leave me alone when I had my breakdown.

She encourage me to have the most impossible dreams, and I encourage her to be more confident in a party.

I clean up her mess and she gives me creative ideas.

She cook for me and I make sure she stay away from scumbags.


.
 

WickedQueen

New member
Joined
Jun 11, 2009
Messages
183
MBTI Type
ESTJ
Enneagram
3w4
So back to the topic on ESTJs having sex with me !

Whom do I need to bribe ? :D

No one. Just ask her straightly what she needs you to do to make her agree to having sex with you. Amazed her.


.
 

EJCC

The Devil of TypoC
Joined
Aug 29, 2008
Messages
19,129
MBTI Type
ESTJ
Enneagram
1w9
Instinctual Variant
sp/so
Are there any more questions?
 

simulatedworld

Freshman Member
Joined
Nov 7, 2008
Messages
5,552
MBTI Type
ENTP
Enneagram
7w6
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
^ Convince him it's what his parents/leaders/community role models/cultural standards would want.
 

entropie

Permabanned
Joined
Apr 24, 2008
Messages
16,767
MBTI Type
entp
Enneagram
783
Dear ESTJ,

what do I do, if I am stranded in a foreign town, 100 miles away from home, got no money to make a call, my cell phone is empty aswell and my bus ticket license has expired by March, last year ? And I am currently standing in the corner of a street, only wearing briefs, being slightly intoxicated and fearing if I may turn to the police right now they gonna send me to mental health ?
 

Fluffywolf

Nips away your dignity
Joined
Mar 31, 2009
Messages
9,581
MBTI Type
INTP
Enneagram
9
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
Dear ESTJ,

I am standing across the street from Entropie with nothing more than a swiss army knife in my pockets. He looks at me with a maniacle deathly stare. I fear for my life. I peer to all directions, but I am cut off, the only way out is to go past Entropie. What do I do?
 

runvardh

にゃん
Joined
Jun 23, 2007
Messages
8,541
MBTI Type
INFP
Enneagram
6w7
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
Would an ESTJ let me have a messy lab if I keep the door closed? (more serious than it looks)
 

EJCC

The Devil of TypoC
Joined
Aug 29, 2008
Messages
19,129
MBTI Type
ESTJ
Enneagram
1w9
Instinctual Variant
sp/so
How can I go about enslaving an ESTJ?

Start by gaining their trust. Then subtly manipulate them. Then go from there. Ease into it. They're gullible - it'll work out. :)
Wait... why am I helping you? Oh god! I've said too much! NOOOOOOOOOOOO

Dear ESTJ,

what do I do, if I am stranded in a foreign town, 100 miles away from home, got no money to make a call, my cell phone is empty aswell and my bus ticket license has expired by March, last year ? And I am currently standing in the corner of a street, only wearing briefs, being slightly intoxicated and fearing if I may turn to the police right now they gonna send me to mental health ?
If it's daytime, siddown on the street and beg for change. If that works, use your coinage to go to the Goodwill or an equivalent store and buy some clothes. Use remaining coins for a phone call. Then you should be good.

Dear ESTJ,

I am standing across the street from Entropie with nothing more than a swiss army knife in my pockets. He looks at me with a maniacle deathly stare. I fear for my life. I peer to all directions, but I am cut off, the only way out is to go past Entropie. What do I do?
(edited. Why do I keep misreading stuff and answering incoherently? Grr.)
Yell and point: "Hey look over there! Free beer!" As he looks in that direction, run past him. If he chases you, duck down and get him in the leg with the knife. That should slow him down enough for you to lose him :)

Would an ESTJ let me have a messy lab if I keep the door closed? (more serious than it looks)
Depends on how messy it is. If it's messy enough that they worry about your work quality, then they probably wouldn't let you. If it's just a little bit messy, and the mess is contained in areas that won't mess your work up, then sure. But mostly, it depends on how obsessive the ESTJ you're talking about actually is. If it really concerns you, I'd keep the door closed just to be safe. Maybe if you cleaned up just a bit, or even just moved the clutter out of your way?
 
Last edited:

runvardh

にゃん
Joined
Jun 23, 2007
Messages
8,541
MBTI Type
INFP
Enneagram
6w7
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
Depends on how messy it is. If it's messy enough that they worry about your work quality, then they probably wouldn't let you. If it's just a little bit messy, and the mess is contained in areas that won't mess your work up, then sure. But mostly, it depends on how obsessive the ESTJ you're talking about actually is. If it really concerns you, I'd keep the door closed just to be safe. Maybe if you cleaned up just a bit, or even just moved the clutter out of your way?

OK. How much would I be allowed to spend on shelves if it would help?
 

simulatedworld

Freshman Member
Joined
Nov 7, 2008
Messages
5,552
MBTI Type
ENTP
Enneagram
7w6
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
There's this ESTP running around here with a really similar username to yours, and you've drawn my attention to how much more respectful ESTJs tend to be, and I appreciate that.
 
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