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[MBTI General] ISFJ & ESFJ represented in a visual comparison

maliafee

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Feb 10, 2009
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These are my cousins, Ashlee (female) and Adam (male).

One is ISFJ, one is ESFJ. Which ones, and why?

AshleeandAdam.jpg

Ashlee and Adam

Ashlee-1.jpg

Ashlee

Adam.jpg

Adam
 

Qre:us

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Boy - ISFJ, Girl - ESFJ

*this one I'm less sure about......
 

wolfy

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Boy ISFJ
Girl ESFJ

Just a feeling though. The boy is pulling back in the picture and the girl is moving forward. Both in the eyes and with their bodies.
 

Thursday

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edit
Girl ESFJ
boy ISFJ
 

Qre:us

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heh. For me though, I must say, it was more of a thought experiment on you maliafee. The nature of the riddle, 2 choices, to make it *harder*, you switching the writing of "One is ISFJ, one is ESFJ" or "ENTJ and INTJ" order to be different than how they appeared in the pics. I dunno if ya did that consciously...but that was my hypothesis. :smile:
 

maliafee

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heh. For me though, I must say, it was more of a thought experiment on you maliafee. The nature of the riddle, 2 choices, to make it *harder*, you switching the writing of "One is ISFJ, one is ESFJ" or "ENTJ and INTJ" order to be different than how they appeared in the pics. I dunno if ya did that consciously...but that was my hypothesis. :smile:

Nope, I was aware of that, and I thought some people might guess that way. But I kept the order of "I" before "E" since I'd done it that way in my first post. :D
 

Qre:us

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Nope, I was aware of that, and I thought some people might guess that way. But I kept the order of "I" before "E" since I'd done it that way in my first post. :D

Yeah, I'm kinda lost with figuring out E vs. I differences, only if "N" is a leading function, so I had to figure route b to this game. :D

Btw, I tried the pasta (but, I must say, I 'cheated'...and my mama was present when I cooked). Next time!
 

maliafee

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Yeah, I'm kinda lost with figuring out E vs. I differences, only if "N" is a leading function, so I had to figure route b to this game. :D

Btw, I tried the pasta (but, I must say, I 'cheated'...and my mama was present when I cooked). Next time!

That's okay. How was it?
 

Udog

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I would have guessed the girl as ESFJ. The smile gave it away.
 

Saslou

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I would have guessed the girl as ESFJ. The smile gave it away.

Hehe .. From the first pic i thought it was her lack of make-up/looking a girly girl that made me think ESFJ .. She look's like a kick ass kind of girl .. in a nice way obviously ;)
 

Udog

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Hehe .. From the first pic i thought it was her lack of make-up/looking a girly girl that made me think ESFJ .. She look's like a kick ass kind of girl .. in a nice way obviously ;)

You're right. That first pic suggested a bit of an ESFJ style edge... all I needed was a nice smile that wasn't quite up to ESFP intensity to convince me. :D
 

Grungemouse

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A mixture of mild (but adorable) dorkiness and absence of smiling? I knew the guy was ISFJ. ISFJs rarely smile in photos, yet outside of them they always seem to have one painted on their faces.
 

maliafee

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A mixture of mild (but adorable) dorkiness and absence of smiling? I knew the guy was ISFJ. ISFJs rarely smile in photos, yet outside of them they always seem to have one painted on their faces.

This is insightful. So true. Why is that, I wonder?!
 

maliafee

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Hehe .. From the first pic i thought it was her lack of make-up/looking a girly girl that made me think ESFJ .. She look's like a kick ass kind of girl .. in a nice way obviously ;)

Yes, she is. She's my baby cousin but always has been really mature for her age and very independent and confident in her own style/opinions. She's like my sister, because we grew up together.

HOWEVER, she's pissed at me right now and hasn't really spoken much to me in a year (I moved away to live with my new boyfriend last year, right in the middle of a quilting project we'd been doing together, etc.). :( I've apologized, but she got mad at me for being so impetuous and moving in with my boyfriend SO fast that I think that made her more mad than losing my companionship.

Any ideas?
 

Saslou

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Yes, she is. She's my baby cousin but always has been really mature for her age and very independent and confident in her own style/opinions. She's like my sister, because we grew up together.

HOWEVER, she's pissed at me right now and hasn't really spoken much to me in a year (I moved away to live with my new boyfriend last year, right in the middle of a quilting project we'd been doing together, etc.). :( I've apologized, but she got mad at me for being so impetuous and moving in with my boyfriend SO fast that I think that made her more mad than losing my companionship.

Any ideas?

Make the first move as she will not .. Tell her you have missed her, that should put at the heart strings .. Although there is a tough exterior, she really is mush inside.
Hope that helps
 

maliafee

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Make the first move as she will not .. Tell her you have missed her, that should put at the heart strings .. Although there is a tough exterior, she really is mush inside.
Hope that helps

Hmm. I already did that. The only thing that got her to talk to me (after like... 8 months) was when I sent her a funny message with quotes of things we used to say when we were kids.

But when I asked if I could call, she said email was best because she works 7 days a week right now (true). But then she hardly answers my emails, and I only write her once in a great while, trying to respect her distance. :(
 

Jeffster

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I'm gonna say the girl is the ISFJ.
 

Saslou

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Hmm. I already did that. The only thing that got her to talk to me (after like... 8 months) was when I sent her a funny message with quotes of things we used to say when we were kids.

But when I asked if I could call, she said email was best because she works 7 days a week right now (true). But then she hardly answers my emails, and I only write her once in a great while, trying to respect her distance. :(

Wow .. she must be one stubborn son of a gun .. just persevere with her and continue to send the emails .. maybe she is just to knackered .. Someone sent me an email in December and it wasn't until March that i replied .. i was busy but also i didn't want to email her back as then i would have to face my problems and i really didn't want to do that ..

Good luck xx
 

Qre:us

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Yes, she is. She's my baby cousin but always has been really mature for her age and very independent and confident in her own style/opinions. She's like my sister, because we grew up together.

HOWEVER, she's pissed at me right now and hasn't really spoken much to me in a year (I moved away to live with my new boyfriend last year, right in the middle of a quilting project we'd been doing together, etc.). :( I've apologized, but she got mad at me for being so impetuous and moving in with my boyfriend SO fast that I think that made her more mad than losing my companionship.

Any ideas?

You may be now seen as unpredictable to her, in which unpredictability = unaccountability. And, for her, it might be hard to wrap up trust in unpredictability, by the very nature of what it is. So, she's letting her emotions fuel her stubborn righteousness, holding on to the hurt allows her to manifest it in ways that could then hurt you....so you may understand the hurt you've caused her. (all this, not as conclusive, but, how she may view things). My best friend, ESFJ, can be very fickle, but, only because she doesn't like letting others down, so she over-commits, and then has to back out. However, she abhors fickleness in intimate relationships, she wants to be very clear on where she stands, in terms of another's feelings for her. And, when a person crosses that line, in her mind, her hurt is very deep and often times, rather than deal with the situation...she rather not deal with the person. Her emotions overwhelm her sometimes, so she retreats. And, finally, changes, life changes, changes in people close to her (which affects, in indirect ways, her own life), are hard to handle for my friend, esp. when she only gets to be 'privy' of the changes at the end. Like she was left out because the other doesn't care to include her. I'd say you try to reach out to her, consistently, not allow her to push you guys away, and every time you reach, add in what makes you twos relationship 'special' to you...give her grounding of the old/the familiar. And, if you can think up of a way, try to make up for the quilting project. Maybe each month mailing the quilt back and forth until finished? To show her your new life (and love) are not replacing the old?


Btw, the dish turned out pretty good, and since the mom was there, we added chicken. AND, the whole family was able to ingest it without making funny faces. I'd say that's success. :D
 
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