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[ISTJ] How does one go about wooing an ISTJ? (and other questions)

Tea Party

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Note: All of these questions are regarding a male ISTJ, in case it makes any difference.


What qualities do ISTJs most gravitate to in others? (In regards to a romantic relationship.)

How important is another person's physical appearance to an ISTJ?

How do ISTJs respond to unrequited love?

Are ISTJs generally self-conscious/afraid of seeming creepy when talking to someone they are interested in romantically? Do they frequently (or ever) worry that their person of interest does not like them or does not trust them?

Are ISTJs at all empathetic to other people who are shy around THEM?

Is it typical that an ISTJ would greet his hopeful love interest with great enthusiasm, but if said love interest ever greets HIM first, he would respond shyly?

How big of a deal is it if an ISTJ shows a consistent interest/concern in another person's feelings/emotional well-being?

How likely is it that an ISTJ would be asked out by a good friend who they do not have romantic feelings for, but the ISTJ dates the good friend anyway out of pity, even if they are not interested in anyone, or have been romantically interested in someone else for a long time (but believe that their love is unrequited?) Could this be interpreted as an attempt to maintain "order" and "balance" in their lives by not hurting their friend's feelings? If the ISTJ tries to keep the relationship a secret, is this a clear sign that the relationship makes him uncomfortable?

There is a very long and complicated story that goes with all of these questions, but I didn't think anyone would want to read all of it, so I just bring you many questions. Sorry for all of the text, but any help or advice would be greatly appreciated!
 

kyuuei

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^ I think a woman strong in her values, what she considers right and wrong and sticking close to that, etc. is a point that has seemed valuable for them.
 

Tea Party

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^ I think a woman strong in her values, what she considers right and wrong and sticking close to that, etc. is a point that has seemed valuable for them.

Oh yay, I think I've got that one down pretty well already... C:
 

Bubbles

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As someone who's attracted an ISTJ or two, I'll try and answer this...but I'm sure the ISTJs here can give you better answers. :blush:

What qualities do ISTJs most gravitate to in others? (In regards to a romantic relationship.)
Understanding, I think. People who listen to them, and take what they say into consideration, stand out to them.

How important is another person's physical appearance to an ISTJ?
In my experience, not much. (But I'm sure they want someone who can decently take care of their appearance.)

How do ISTJs respond to unrequited love?
Um...not well at first? Depends on who's unrequited. If it's them, not well, but if it's someone else? I can't answer that.

Are ISTJs generally self-conscious/afraid of seeming creepy when talking to someone they are interested in romantically? Do they frequently (or ever) worry that their person of interest does not like them or does not trust them?
I think everyone worries about that, but as for the ISTJs I know, a major yes to all of the above.

Are ISTJs at all empathetic to other people who are shy around THEM?
Mm, toughie, I can't answer that. Sorry! :(

Is it typical that an ISTJ would greet his hopeful love interest with great enthusiasm, but if said love interest ever greets HIM first, he would respond shyly?
Sounds about right. :)

How big of a deal is it if an ISTJ shows a consistent interest/concern in another person's feelings/emotional well-being?
Depends on the ISTJ, again, but usually yes.

How likely is it that an ISTJ would be asked out by a good friend who they do not have romantic feelings for, but the ISTJ dates the good friend anyway out of pity, even if they are not interested in anyone, or have been romantically interested in someone else for a long time (but believe that their love is unrequited?) Could this be interpreted as an attempt to maintain "order" and "balance" in their lives by not hurting their friend's feelings?
Um, uh, well, hm. I don't think ISTJs would lie, but I don't think they like to hurt people, either. They're very trustworthy, though, so I don't think one would say yes to a date unless they felt that person was someone they wanted to date. They take their romantic partners seriously. But I can't really say.

There is a very long and complicated story that goes with all of these questions, but I didn't think anyone would want to read all of it, so I just bring you many questions. Sorry for all of the text, but any help or advice would be greatly appreciated!
Gosh, there's always a complicated story, isn't there? Good luck, and I'm sorry that I had to give you my half-baked answers--I'm just a poor INFP trying to probe the minds of the ISTJs she knows. It's out of my league, haha.

EDIT: And I second what Kyuuei said!
 

Tea Party

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Um...not well at first? Depends on who's unrequited. If it's them, not well, but if it's someone else? I can't answer that.

Sorry, I meant if it's them. (Although if it's someone else would be nice to know too...) Thank you for all of your helpful answers, they weren't half-baked at all! C:
 

Quinlan

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Tell them you like how they've organised their record collection.
 

Cimarron

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Oh boy. I'll give it a shot.
How do ISTJs respond to unrequited love?
It's difficult to let go and move on, if we're talking about love.
Are ISTJs at all empathetic to other people who are shy around THEM?
I might not notice, but if I do, yes. I wouldn't go and embarrass her or something once I realize she's being shy. Probably try to give her a little more space, even (I don't know).
Is it typical that an ISTJ would greet his hopeful love interest with great enthusiasm, but if said love interest ever greets HIM first, he would respond shyly?
I could see it.
How big of a deal is it if an ISTJ shows a consistent interest/concern in another person's feelings/emotional well-being?
That sounds like a very big deal. I can show a little concern for most people in general, but *genuine* concern I think is a noticeable difference. For people I care about, I give them my full attention and try to make sure they know it. This is even stronger when I like someone.
How likely is it that an ISTJ would be asked out by a good friend who they do not have romantic feelings for, but the ISTJ dates the good friend anyway out of pity, even if they are not interested in anyone, or have been romantically interested in someone else for a long time (but believe that their love is unrequited)?
Personally, I don't think I could do it--but it could vary from person to person. I'd feel horrible letting down a friend, especially because I think of myself in her shoes, but I'd have to tell her "no."
If the ISTJ tries to keep the relationship a secret, is this a clear sign that the relationship makes him uncomfortable?
This is tricky. I never feel much of a need to flaunt a relationship, and I'm not much into public display of affection...maybe only a little. It's private stuff, just between her and me. Of course, this isn't the same as "hiding" a relationship, something which isn't a good sign, especially if he's still thinking about his unrequited love. Just make sure you can tell the difference.
 
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Amira

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Note: All of these questions are regarding a male ISTJ, in case it makes any difference.
Well, I'm a girl but I'll answer from my perspective and it might help a little...

What qualities do ISTJs most gravitate to in others? (In regards to a romantic relationship.)
Someone who takes life seriously but is also a happy person; someone who is interested in me!

How important is another person's physical appearance to an ISTJ?
Not very.

How do ISTJs respond to unrequited love?
On my part, gah. Can't stand the feeling and that is one of the reason it takes me a LONG time to decide I can let myself like someone.

Are ISTJs generally self-conscious/afraid of seeming creepy when talking to someone they are interested in romantically? Do they frequently (or ever) worry that their person of interest does not like them or does not trust them?
Ha ha ha! :hi: That's me all right.

Are ISTJs at all empathetic to other people who are shy around THEM?
Of course. I like to try to put people at their ease. Being a girl myself, I don't usually have to help guys that way.

Is it typical that an ISTJ would greet his hopeful love interest with great enthusiasm, but if said love interest ever greets HIM first, he would respond shyly?
Yeah, if I wasn't prepared and suddenly saw them, I'd be kind of confused and nervous.

How big of a deal is it if an ISTJ shows a consistent interest/concern in another person's feelings/emotional well-being?
Well, if I was always asking about how someone was doing emotionally, either they are a very good friend or something more.

How likely is it that an ISTJ would be asked out by a good friend who they do not have romantic feelings for, but the ISTJ dates the good friend anyway out of pity, even if they are not interested in anyone, or have been romantically interested in someone else for a long time (but believe that their love is unrequited?) Could this be interpreted as an attempt to maintain "order" and "balance" in their lives by not hurting their friend's feelings?
Wouldn't do it.

If the ISTJ tries to keep the relationship a secret, is this a clear sign that the relationship makes him uncomfortable?
I can't really imagine keeping a relationship secret.


HTH a little!
 

d@v3

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All right, I'll do my best on these! :D

What qualities do ISTJs most gravitate to in others?
Loyalty, Honesty, Modesty, Caring, Empathetic, Sympathetic (to an extent)

How important is another person's physical appearance to an ISTJ?
From the romantic point of view? Well, this is going to sound shallow, but there has to be a physical attraction. BUT, that's not to say the physical attraction has to be there from the get go, I mean, I have been friends with a girl and then developed feelings and found her physically attractive after that. :yes:

How do ISTJs respond to unrequited love?
It sucks, but eventually we figure out that it's not worth wasting our time on. It also depends on how we are rejected. If the person the ISTJ loves is warm and kind as opposed to inconsiderate of the ISTJ's feelings, then we can remain friends. Although, the friendship would probably seem distant with a high chance of tapering off.

Are ISTJs generally self-conscious/afraid of seeming creepy when talking to someone they are interested in romantically? Do they frequently (or ever) worry that their person of interest does not like them or does not trust them?
Depends on how much confidence we have. But I would say in general, yes, this is true. I find I have this problem too often and my thoughts overtake my confidence and I end up being too shy to talk to the person.

Are ISTJs at all empathetic to other people who are shy around THEM?
I think so? Assuming this is the individual I am interested in: It depends on the circumstance. If I felt it wouldn't compromise her feelings, I MIGHT say a joke or something to instigate laughter. If I do take this route, I will then shy away until she makes a move. If I do not take the instigator route, I will also be shy around her and probably do that smile and look away thing... you know, when I see her looking at me I will smile a little bit and look away shyly. It's embarassing, I don't like it, and I don't do it on purpose. :peepwall:

Is it typical that an ISTJ would greet his hopeful love interest with great enthusiasm, but if said love interest ever greets HIM first, he would respond shyly?
Yes, I would be very nervous when greeting her and I would force myself to try to be extroverted... but overall, the shyness always wins. If she greeted first I would be shy as well. So either way, shyness wins. :(

How big of a deal is it if an ISTJ shows a consistent interest/concern in another person's feelings/emotional well-being?
I don't understand this question. Do you mean another person aside from the individual that the ISTJ is romantically interested in? If the ISTJ shows interest in you, and ONLY you, then that is very good. If the ISTJ shows interest equally with you and other girls, that is more than likely very bad.

How likely is it that an ISTJ would be asked out by a good friend who they do not have romantic feelings for, but the ISTJ dates the good friend anyway out of pity, even if they are not interested in anyone, or have been romantically interested in someone else for a long time (but believe that their love is unrequited?) Could this be interpreted as an attempt to maintain "order" and "balance" in their lives by not hurting their friend's feelings?
This would be rare. If an ISTJ says yes, he is usually in it for the long run.

If the ISTJ tries to keep the relationship a secret, is this a clear sign that the relationship makes him uncomfortable?
Yes, but not necessarily uncomfortable with YOU (in fact that would be very rare), but perhaps he is just uncomfortable with what other people within his social circle think about the two of you. Also, it is about privacy/security. The relationship is between myself and my lady friend and not really anyone else's business. Although I would NOT take extreme measures and go out of my way to keep it a secret, unless under certain cirumstances.

The more details you post about your story, the more detailed answers you will get. Also, check out other threads you may find clues in them too. :yes:
 

Tea Party

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Probably try to give her a little more space, even (I don't know).
Wow, really...? I had never even considered something like that... thank you for enlightening me.


This is tricky. I never feel much of a need to flaunt a relationship, and I'm not much into public display of affection...maybe only a little. It's private stuff, just between her and me. Of course, this isn't the same as "hiding" a relationship, something which isn't a good sign, especially if he's still thinking about his unrequited love. Just make sure you can tell the difference.
No, it's pretty much hiding. In this case, the girl he is, well, WAS dating (who was not me,) basically chose to disregard his wishes to keep the relationship a secret, and once the secret was out THEN he went along with PDA and all that. (Not really any PDA outside of holding hands, except for one time I quite accidentally stumbled upon the girl getting all lovey dovey with him and he looked vastly uncomfortable.)
 

Eagle

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Note: All of these questions are regarding a male ISTJ, in case it makes any difference.


What qualities do ISTJs most gravitate to in others? (In regards to a romantic relationship.)
Loyalty, Good Sense, Fun Loving, Modesty, Honesty, Caring, Empathetic, Flirtatious?

How important is another person's physical appearance to an ISTJ?
Yes, physical attraction is important. Now, since what's attractive varies from person to person. :D

How do ISTJs respond to unrequited love?
Yes, from the if the ISTJ's love is unrequited sucks. Odds are any relationship will deteriorate into nothingness.


Are ISTJs generally self-conscious/afraid of seeming creepy when talking to someone they are interested in romantically? Do they frequently (or ever) worry that their person of interest does not like them or does not trust them?
Varies from person to person. Who doesn't have those thoughts at some point? I can see how an ISTJ's thoughts overwhelm their courage, but that's not always the case, some are more open, others are not.

Are ISTJs at all empathetic to other people who are shy around THEM?
I would say yes for the most part. Some might even find it attractive. It depends on the circumstances and the individual.

Is it typical that an ISTJ would greet his hopeful love interest with great enthusiasm, but if said love interest ever greets HIM first, he would respond shyly?
Enthusiasm... Depends on the person, but most would at least force themselves to be somewhat extroverted. Shyness is probably going to occur if the ISTJ is greeted. They also will probably be thrown off guard.

How big of a deal is it if an ISTJ shows a consistent interest/concern in another person's feelings/emotional well-being?
Yes, you and only you is very good. You more so then others is good. You and others is ok, but not good.

How likely is it that an ISTJ would be asked out by a good friend who they do not have romantic feelings for, but the ISTJ dates the good friend anyway out of pity, even if they are not interested in anyone, or have been romantically interested in someone else for a long time (but believe that their love is unrequited?) Could this be interpreted as an attempt to maintain "order" and "balance" in their lives by not hurting their friend's feelings? If the ISTJ tries to keep the relationship a secret, is this a clear sign that the relationship makes him uncomfortable?
Yes, in it for the long run indeed. I can see how this might occur, but saying no typically isn't very hard for many ISTJs. If it is there is at least some feelings of care and probably attraction.

There is a very long and complicated story that goes with all of these questions, but I didn't think anyone would want to read all of it, so I just bring you many questions. Sorry for all of the text, but any help or advice would be greatly appreciated.

So, there. Hopefully that is somewhat helpful in conjunction with the rest of the comments from ISTJs. I'm willing to read the story and offer advice if you want it or need it. PM me or what not.
 

uberrogo

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Note: All of these questions are regarding a male ISTJ, in case it makes any difference.


What qualities do ISTJs most gravitate to in others? (In regards to a romantic relationship.)
I gravitate towards anyone who gives me romantic attention - unfortuantely.

How important is another person's physical appearance to an ISTJ?
I like pretty faces. Below average bodies are acceptable. I think short hair is a sign of laziness and is just not that attractive. A nice manicure and pedicure can go a long way. Don't dress like a slob. Straight teeth are a plus.

How do ISTJs respond to unrequited love?
Perseverance pays

Are ISTJs generally self-conscious/afraid of seeming creepy when talking to someone they are interested in romantically? Do they frequently (or ever) worry that their person of interest does not like them or does not trust them?
Alot of people would describe me as creepy. I dont mind, I will still bother someone, but I know when flirting turns into harrassment.

Are ISTJs at all empathetic to other people who are shy around THEM?
It could be cute if you can play your shyness as some kind of an underdog.

Is it typical that an ISTJ would greet his hopeful love interest with great enthusiasm, but if said love interest ever greets HIM first, he would respond shyly?
Either way is cool with me.

How big of a deal is it if an ISTJ shows a consistent interest/concern in another person's feelings/emotional well-being?
It depends. I ask all my friends how they are doing at all times. I even try to fix their problems, by force if necessary.

How likely is it that an ISTJ would be asked out by a good friend who they do not have romantic feelings for, but the ISTJ dates the good friend anyway out of pity, even if they are not interested in anyone, or have been romantically interested in someone else for a long time (but believe that their love is unrequited?) Could this be interpreted as an attempt to maintain "order" and "balance" in their lives by not hurting their friend's feelings? If the ISTJ tries to keep the relationship a secret, is this a clear sign that the relationship makes him uncomfortable?
Could be. If I kept someone a secret, it would be cause I didnt want to disrupt any of the established order. I stopped pursueing a few girls cause I found out that my friends had dated them many years ago.

There is a very long and complicated story that goes with all of these questions, but I didn't think anyone would want to read all of it, so I just bring you many questions. Sorry for all of the text, but any help or advice would be greatly appreciated!

Probably the whole story would help this confusing situation.
 

Tea Party

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I don't understand this question. Do you mean another person aside from the individual that the ISTJ is romantically interested in? If the ISTJ shows interest in you, and ONLY you, then that is very good. If the ISTJ shows interest equally with you and other girls, that is more than likely very bad.
Well, he's nice to everybody, but it often seems like he is especially nice to me. He is very concerned with not saying things that will offend me, and will sometimes ask me if something will offend me before he says it. (He doesn't do this with anyone else.) I am extremely shy around him and it is very difficult for me to work up the nerve to speak to him, but despite my rarely talking to him, he will still ask me questions like how my day was (usually I see him in the early morning, so it's kind of a silly question to ask because my day's barely started) on a relatively frequent basis. He also always takes notice when I am especially depressed (I am always depressed because of him, but he doesn't know that) and he will ask me if I'm okay because I seem "kind of down." I am usually honest with him and shake my head no, to which he normally smiles and tells me awkwardly that he hopes I feel better. I think I was only dishonest about the way I felt once, when I told him that nothing was wrong, and he made these sad eyes and this little distressed noise in the back of his throat. :/

This would be rare. If an ISTJ says yes, he is usually in it for the long run.
He wasn't, in this case. The relationship only lasted about three and a half months. (I'm not entirely sure if it was even that long though, it's just an estimation.) He was the one to end it.

Yes, but not necessarily uncomfortable with YOU (in fact that would be very rare), but perhaps he is just uncomfortable with what other people within his social circle think about the two of you. Also, it is about privacy/security. The relationship is between myself and my lady friend and not really anyone else's business. Although I would NOT take extreme measures and go out of my way to keep it a secret, unless under certain cirumstances.
Oh, he wasn't dating ME, haha. I am his supposed "unrequited love" in this case. (Except that it's not unrequited, I have loved him for a year.) I believe that he was interested in me at least at one point, but I was in denial for a long time and did not want to be in love, because I knew it would likely cause me a lot of emotional pain. (And it does!) :/ So my bashfulness mixed with my anxiety over dating essentially created an aloof demeanor that he interpreted as me disliking him, which I'm sure was of course very discouraging. (He once described it as being like "talking to a wall," which hurt me a lot, but probably not as much as it hurt him.) Then he started dating the other girl about six months ago, I was completely and utterly crushed (and honestly still continue to be.) But then he broke up with her, and he never stopped treating me the same way at any point.... so I'm trying to figure out if even now, after all this, he could possibly still be interested in me.
 

Tea Party

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More responses! :0 Thank you, you're all so helpful. I will respond to everything else tomorrow, but I really kind of have to go to sleep now. >_o
 

Cimarron

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I hate to answer with a personal story as if to say it always happens that way, but I've been in a similar situation before, and I was never over the first girl even though I went out with someone else in the meantime. It was more significant once the relationship with the second girl ended, also. So the point is that it could happen...
 

raz

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What qualities do ISTJs most gravitate to in others?
Someone that can spontaneously think of fun things to do. Well-coordinated and groomed. Genuinely nurturing without being overbearing, which is basically an IxFx. Bluntness. Someone intuitive, in a general sense. I really go for someone that can make concluding jumps on their own. Someone capable of witty banter.

I think I described an ENFJ? LOL.

How important is another person's physical appearance to an ISTJ?
I'd have to say anything up to 30ish pounds overweight, and that's a vague estimate. Once you reach a certain point, it starts to tell you about the person's self-image. Like I said in another thread, when I can see a girl's bra that they're wearing, it's an instant turn off. It can take a girl I'm really interested in and just kill the attraction.

How do ISTJs respond to unrequited love?
It's very hard to let go, especially if you're still going to see the person in your life after you find out it's unrequited. It's situational.


Are ISTJs generally self-conscious/afraid of seeming creepy when talking to someone they are interested in romantically? Do they frequently (or ever) worry that their person of interest does not like them or does not trust them?

I frequently worry about someone not liking me but it's mostly because I'm just so predictable and by the book. I'm the opposite of spontaneous and the introversion keeps me from really being lively. It turns away a lot of people just because I keep to myself so much.

Are ISTJs at all empathetic to other people who are shy around THEM?

No. Not at all. I can tell when people are shy around me or don't have the strength to maintain a strong conversation. I'll keep the conversation going, but once I notice it, my opinion of the person plummets and they're immediately put in the "frustrating person" category.


Is it typical that an ISTJ would greet his hopeful love interest with great enthusiasm, but if said love interest ever greets HIM first, he would respond shyly?

Definitely. I would have to initiate it because then I would be ready. If someone came to me first, I would be so unprepared that I would likely give some automatic canned response.

How big of a deal is it if an ISTJ shows a consistent interest/concern in another person's feelings/emotional well-being?

Pretty damn big. I usually don't care about other people. I'm not hostile. It just rarely enters my mind. There are 2-3 people in my life that have caused me to be genuinely concerned about them. It was either through a problem they were having or I grew some major attraction to them, and the attraction causes a massive amount of interest in their well-being.

The only time I ever care to do something "kind" for someone is when I see someone needing something done that they're just plain incapable of doing. That's when I'll stand up and do it, just because there's this sudden feeling inside overwhelming me that someone's trying to do something impossible that they really need.


How likely is it that an ISTJ would be asked out by a good friend who they do not have romantic feelings for, but the ISTJ dates the good friend anyway out of pity, even if they are not interested in anyone, or have been romantically interested in someone else for a long time (but believe that their love is unrequited?) Could this be interpreted as an attempt to maintain "order" and "balance" in their lives by not hurting their friend's feelings?

Never had that happen to me.

If the ISTJ tries to keep the relationship a secret, is this a clear sign that the relationship makes him uncomfortable?

Can't answer this one since I've never been in that situation. Though, I would say yes.
 

d@v3

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Well, he's nice to everybody, but it often seems like he is especially nice to me. He is very concerned with not saying things that will offend me, and will sometimes ask me if something will offend me before he says it. (He doesn't do this with anyone else.) I am extremely shy around him and it is very difficult for me to work up the nerve to speak to him, but despite my rarely talking to him, he will still ask me questions like how my day was (usually I see him in the early morning, so it's kind of a silly question to ask because my day's barely started) on a relatively frequent basis. He also always takes notice when I am especially depressed (I am always depressed because of him, but he doesn't know that) and he will ask me if I'm okay because I seem "kind of down." I am usually honest with him and shake my head no, to which he normally smiles and tells me awkwardly that he hopes I feel better. I think I was only dishonest about the way I felt once, when I told him that nothing was wrong, and he made these sad eyes and this little distressed noise in the back of his throat. :/


He wasn't, in this case. The relationship only lasted about three and a half months. (I'm not entirely sure if it was even that long though, it's just an estimation.) He was the one to end it.


Oh, he wasn't dating ME, haha. I am his supposed "unrequited love" in this case. (Except that it's not unrequited, I have loved him for a year.) I believe that he was interested in me at least at one point, but I was in denial for a long time and did not want to be in love, because I knew it would likely cause me a lot of emotional pain. (And it does!) :/ So my bashfulness mixed with my anxiety over dating essentially created an aloof demeanor that he interpreted as me disliking him, which I'm sure was of course very discouraging. (He once described it as being like "talking to a wall," which hurt me a lot, but probably not as much as it hurt him.) Then he started dating the other girl about six months ago, I was completely and utterly crushed (and honestly still continue to be.) But then he broke up with her, and he never stopped treating me the same way at any point.... so I'm trying to figure out if even now, after all this, he could possibly still be interested in me.


Sounds like you like eachother! :yes: So he kept the other girl a secret? Sounds like he was just dating her to put the pressure on you to see if you would budge on your decision or maybe he was just trying to move on but couldn't. Either way, it's not a big deal if you truly do love him especially if he never stopped treating you the same.

Any variation of the question "How was your day?" is a classic ISTJ way of saying "I care about you." (I say the same thing to a girl I am trying to date.) :D

The sad eyes indicate that he knows you lied about whether or not you were feeling bad and he was trying to empathize with you. I guess that is what the noise in the back of the throat was for too, although I have never done that or heard of that before.

You being aloof/ignoring him = you not caring about him. It's as simple as that in the eyes of an ISTJ. Although SOMETIMES we can see through your smokescreen of aloofness and see how you REALLY feel. It kind of sounds like you are sending mixed signals to him. Being bashful around him and ignoring him are two different things. If you are bashful (blushing, giggling) it means you like him, if you ignore (keep conversations short, keep your distance around him) him that means you do not care about him.

You said he makes you depressed, why? :huh:
 

raz

Let's make this showy!
Joined
Nov 11, 2008
Messages
2,523
MBTI Type
LoLz
I didn't know if I was the only one to make quick judgments on my own interpretations of people's responses to me. Maybe it's the Te applying cause and effect to the situation?
 

d@v3

Perfect Gentleman! =D
Joined
Nov 20, 2008
Messages
2,830
MBTI Type
ISTJ
Yeah, I make judgements on what people think of me all the time. It's okay to do it if you don't take your judgements too seriously, otherwise they can be intoxicating. But once you DO make those judgements what do you do about them? I just try to steer the conversation into a better direction or end it all together. Not knowing how to read people is like having "feelings" and not knowing what to do with them- which unfortunately happens to me quite a bit. I just force my "feelings" to take the back seat so they don't cloud my judgement. Eventually I will forget about them. :yes:
 
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