[ISTJ] How to Escape Female ISTJ

[Amargith]

Yes but what exactly does "open to a relationship" mean? Is there a door I don't know about? Is it locked? Perhaps I should be working on my lockpicking skills?

It means she needs time to figure out what went wrong, time to stop loving him, to heal from the pain, and time to figure out what she wants to do differently next time. In other words: time!

Though I won't lie, chances are that you are unlikely to be what she will go hunting for next. If that turns out not to be the case, she'll let ya know, I'm sure.

 

[d@v3]

I'm guess Habba and you are both right. So I don't text her or talk to her anymore. It's mean but what's the point if there is nothing in store for me? She is not interested in me at all and she never will be.

I need to find my next ENFP victim. This time I can't screw it up though. Where to find ENFP's? They are easy to spot but not easy to get close to without them suspecting your intentions!

 

[Amargith]

This time, make contact before(!) you're interested *that way*. And you might have a chance at synchronizing your feelings if any develop

 

[Siegfried]

This time, make contact before(!) you're interested *that way*. And you might have a chance at synchronizing your feelings if any develop

This is a good idea, or it'd be like Deja Vu without rose tinted glasses

 

[Tiny Army]

I need to be at least somewhat sexually attracted to someone if I'm dating them. If I am going out on dates with someone, it is pretty much guaranteed that I will sleep with them. If I'm not immediately attracted to someone I know it's not going to work out as a relationship.

I rather enjoy being friends with my crushes before I ask them out (or, well, jump them because that is usually my approach). It gives me the opportunity to really observe all the things that made me attracted to them in the first place while also giving me the opportunity to put away the rose tinted glasses of romantic interest and see if there are things I don't like about them that might make me regret the decision to pursue something more than a friendship later.

I would love to know how you can approach a person romantically without being their friend first? I always thought of romantic interest as something that built up over a period of getting to know each other.

 

[Habba]

This time, make contact before(!) you're interested *that way*. And you might have a chance at synchronizing your feelings if any develop

But that would be like asking ENFPs to be decisive, logical and stable.

I suggest you to be what you are, but take into consideration that others are not. So, figure out first what their type is (serves your Si function well), and then adjust yourself just a little bit, to reach out for the other person the way she feels the best. For an example, with ENFPs, take your time and just try to act as if you were just happy being friends. (And when they do believe you, you STRIKE! )

Don't know if it would work, but it's worth the try is it not?

 

[d@v3]

This time, make contact before(!) you're interested *that way*. And you might have a chance at synchronizing your feelings if any develop

I might make contact alright, but I wouldn't know what to say! Then it would be awkward and strange. Awkward and strange is not good.

 

[Habba]

Why we talking about ENFPs, and not about ISTJ women?

 

[Tiny Army]

But ENFPs are awkward and strange. We're just usually really comfortable with this! Just say something. They will usually take it from there.

 

[Amargith]

I might make contact alright, but I wouldn't know what to say! Then it would be awkward and strange. Awkward and strange is not good.

Depending on how it is done, it can be cute and endearing, and she'll gladly help ya out.

Habba: I realize I'm asking something odd for you guys, but you have to realize that it takes time to assess such things and since we're highly unlikely to see you guys observing us...

 

[Costrin]

Why we talking about ENFPs, and not about ISTJ women?

ENFPs are narcissistic attention whores, that's why.

 

[Amargith]

ENFPs are narcissistic attention whores, that's why.

Aww are you feeling ignored again?

 

[d@v3]

Aww are you feeling ignored again?

Amargith! No wubbies!

Ahem, anyway. I'm making a new thread.... its going to be backwards.. but it will leave this thread for people seeking help with ISTJ girls.

And Habba, ENFP's are MUCH more attractive and interesting to know about. Not sure why though.

I'll make it in the relationships section.

 

[Costrin]

Aww are you feeling ignored again?

You really shouldn't project your neediness and the behaviours you use to rectify that onto other people. Assuming is bad, remember? Makes an ass out of u and me and all that.

 

[Cenomite]

My Mom is an ISTJ, there was no escape...

 

[Wild horses]

Hang on Dave... you're not romantically attracted to her because you can imagine how two ISTJs would be together!? Give her a chance... if you did not know she was ISTJ would you be romantically attracted!? Perhaps this is where MBTI falls down cos it limits our choices! and controls our decisions!

 

[d@v3]

My Mom is an ISTJ, there was no escape...

LOL! That sucks! And that's NOT good news for me!

 

[d@v3]

Hang on Dave... you're not romantically attracted to her because you can imagine how two ISTJs would be together!? Give her a chance... if you did not know she was ISTJ would you be romantically attracted!? Perhaps this is where MBTI falls down cos it limits our choices! and controls our decisions!

No No No Wild, I am NOT attracted to her AT ALL. I don't care what her type is. LOL.

 

[Shaula]

I wouldn't mind being probed by an ENFP! But the ENFP I was chasing didn't probe me at all. [Maybe she was an INFP?! ]She just wrote me off without giving me a chance. I had to do all that work finding things out about her too! And it was all a waste of time!

Have you ever been probed by an ENFP, in person? They can ask some pretty damn personal stuff and can be very persistant about it. Frankly I found the experience to be highly annoying.

And what's wrong with INFPs? Do you believe that ENFPs are the one and sole type that you can have a healthy, growing relationship with? I'm curious now. Were you interested in the girl because of her personality or her personality type? If you only look for ENFPs you are cutting out the majority of the population who could have been perfect for you. You could have lost a chance of a lifetime just because they weren't an ENFP. You can't just categorise people into boxes.

I'm guess Habba and you are both right. So I don't text her or talk to her anymore. It's mean but what's the point if there is nothing in store for me? She is not interested in me at all and she never will be.

I need to find my next ENFP victim. This time I can't screw it up though. Where to find ENFP's? They are easy to spot but not easy to get close to without them suspecting your intentions!

I don't understand why you can't be friends with her even if she is not interested in a romantic relationship. If she is a worth while person then she is worth your time. What's in store for you? How about a new frienship, someone whom you can count on, a person to hang out with and have a good time with. That seems like a worthwhile investment.

You seem to have a bit of an obsession with ENFPs. I hope you realise that this can be unhealthy.

Advice from my ISTJ father: JUST RELAX. <--- That's all.

 

[d@v3]

OK New ISTJ-ENFP thread is in the relationships section.