[ISTJ] ISTJs - Birds Of A Feather...

[Rachelinpa]

...Flock Together?

The ISTJ I have met tend to only hang out with other STJs and occasionally an SFJ will get in the mix.

My ISTJ roommate said that the reason he liked this one girl was because they were "exactly the same."

Is this a personality thing or is it just that they have not met any other types? Truth be told, I have not encountered very many other types since I moved here (just ESFPs -- always the ESFPs...).

I guess I want to know if ISTJs tend to find value in differences or if not, why not. Do you prefer people who are the same as you?

 

[Cimarron]

I guess I want to know if ISTJs tend to find value in differences or if not, why not. Do you prefer people who are the same as you?

I don't know. I don't really think about it that way. Friendships usually just happen, more from convenience or coincidence than from actually planning and putting in effort.

I'd really like to have friends who I have a "connection" with, but I hear everyone on the board saying this. In fact, I need someone who takes more initiative and comes up with new ideas...otherwise nothing would ever happen.

Out of the ISTJs I know, your theory doesn't hold because we're bad at communicating. It makes it hard to form close bonds with other ISTJs, in my experience. Which I guess means I wanted to, but "can't," so maybe your theory isn't completely off...It just seems it isn't any more or less true for me than for other types.

 

[d@v3]

For a girlfriend or a spouse, I would rather have a Exxx because I need someone who is able to pull me away from my work and schedule and make my life an unpredictable mess! At the same time, I need someone who would care about me for who I am. Because "until death do us part" means that is the only thing stopping an ISTJ because they are so loyal!

Also if their spouse cheats on them or if the feelings are lost and not coming back, that could also be a deal breaker for ISTJ. Typically speaking though, ISTJ will do almost ANYTHING to keep a relationship together.

For friendship, I can pretty much be friends with anyone- they just have to permit the time to get to know me.

I hope that information helps?

 

[Cimarron]

Yeah, I have a hard time making friends with Introverts. That's why almost all my friends are Extroverts!

 

[d@v3]

Also, the Exxx seem to enjoy the sarcasm and laugh a lot more than other ISTJ girls- I think. So that is another reason I would like that type.

 

[MissMurder]

Also, the Exxx seem to enjoy the sarcasm and laugh a lot more than other ISTJ girls- I think. So that is another reason I would like that type.

I love sarcasm, and I find a lot to laugh at in the world. I just can't help myself.

 

[d@v3]

So the hard part is trying to woo the Exxx types- that is where ISTJ's (especially myself) REALLY screw up! I like girls who laugh and have fun!

 

[PinkIceTD]

I love sarcasm, and I find a lot to laugh at in the world. I just can't help myself.

Yeah, me too. Cimarron and d@ve3, I like your answers.

 

[d@v3]

Thanks Pink!

My favorite thing to do is to make people feel good about themselves and help them. It's amazing how being nice to someone can go so far!

So if your a "damzel in distress" (and your not in public/ noone else is around)I think there is a good chance an ISTJ will come help you? Although, the ISTJ's intentions may not be obvious at first- give them a few sentences or words and maybe you will figure it out?

 

[ArbiterDewey]

Yeah, I have a hard time making friends with Introverts. That's why almost all my friends are Extroverts!

Yeah, I'm the same. I typically hang out with 3 ENFP's, lol.

I was good friends with another ISTJ, but we just played D&D together for most of a year. As far as dating another ISTJ...honestly, I think I'd get bored, lol.

 

[d@v3]

I think my best friend is an ENFP , but I would like to meet a cute ENFP girl... hmmm now where and how to find them!

 

[PinkIceTD]

I think my best friend is an ENFP , but I would like to meet a cute ENFP girl... hmmm now where and how to find them!

More than likely, we'll find you!

 

[d@v3]

More than likely, we'll find you!

Yeah... I used to think that, but after so many years I have gotten impatient!Not sure how the other ISTJ's feel but I guess after being alone for so long it drives me crazy sometimes! ESPECIALLY during the holiday seasons! THEY ARE THE WORST to be alone in! :sad:

However, I am not (and never will be) "desperate" enough to beg for a date.

 

[ArbiterDewey]

Yeah... I used to think that, but after so many years I have gotten impatient!Not sure how the other ISTJ's feel but I guess after being alone for so long it drives me crazy sometimes! ESPECIALLY during the holiday seasons! THEY ARE THE WORST to be alone in! :sad:

However, I am not (and never will be) "desperate" enough to beg for a date.

Understood. Completely.

 

[Cimarron]

Yeah... I used to think that, but after so many years I have gotten impatient!Not sure how the other ISTJ's feel but I guess after being alone for so long it drives me crazy sometimes!

After my last girlfriend, I was feeling that way. Really lonely for about two years in the relationship sense, and it was tough to be stuck there. Then for the next four years after that, it wasn't as big a deal anymore. Sure, I'd like to have a nice girlfriend, but I saw no reason in putting so much worry or effort into it. I just try to put it into the bigger perspective of life.

 

[d@v3]

Yes, but I am speaking from never actually having a girlfriend. You know, one that actually cared- not one that pretended and then go off and cheated on you! I try to shrug it off, but when the holidays come around, it makes it very difficult.

Now my sister is getting married and she will not be able to spend the holidays with us as she used to (she is the only other sibling I have that I talk to regularly)- I will be even more alone! It doesn't help that I'm not exactly 100% with my future brother-in-law! Hmmm... I can't win!

 

[PinkIceTD]

Yeah... I used to think that, but after so many years I have gotten impatient!Not sure how the other ISTJ's feel but I guess after being alone for so long it drives me crazy sometimes! ESPECIALLY during the holiday seasons! THEY ARE THE WORST to be alone in! :sad:

However, I am not (and never will be) "desperate" enough to beg for a date.

You said one of your good friends is an ENFP, I'm sure they could get you into some situation where you could meet a girl. Look at it this way, there are more women than men so the odds of meeting someone (if you actively seek it) are pretty good


Where to meet us? Anywhere really, typically for me, a bookstore, movie theater, club, work, friends house gatherings. yeah.

 

[d@v3]

Well, he is out of the country right now, then he will be back for Christmas, then go back to school in another state! Yes, it is real boring during the school year for me! I am afraid I would have to rely on myself to seek out an Exxx girl, - so I guess I shouldn't get my hopes up!