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  1. #1
    Vulnerability Eilonwy's Avatar
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    Default NT and debate vs discussion

    Do NTs only think in terms of debate? In other words, every communication is part of a zero-sum game (win/lose, dominate/submit)? Or does discussion exist in the NT vocabulary?
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    Floating in space j.c.t.'s Avatar
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    Discussion is closer to what I favour.
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  3. #3

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    If we deny this, will we be debating? Just a thought.

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    Egad! No bondage! Obfuscate's Avatar
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    there are very few people who do either strictly, without indulging in the other... i would suggest you widen your social circle to find clarity if this isn't obvious...
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    Vulnerability Eilonwy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by bechimo View Post
    If we deny this, will we be debating? Just a thought.
    Ha! No. It's safe to deny it.
    Johari / Nohari

    “That we are capable only of being what we are remains our unforgivable sin.” ― Gene Wolfe

    reminder to self: "That YOU that you are so proud of is a story woven together by your interpreter module to account for as much of your behavior as it can incorporate, and it denies or rationalizes the rest." "Who's in Charge? Free Will and the Science of the Brain" by Michael S. Gazzaniga

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    She flew away. Angel Cake's Avatar
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    I've had enough - more than enough - conversations with my mom and BF on a variety of subjects, to say with certainty that this isn't true.

    Sure, NTs tend to see things from a more logical perspective, but not to the point where every conversation becomes a debate or whatnot. In fact, the NTs in my life are often so kind and patient with someone like me, that it becomes so easy to openly share ideas with each other and expand each other's views through even the most casual talks.

    Well... I love it at least...
    Break through the shackles of the mind... unless you like it that way, who am I to judge?

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    Analytical Dreamer Coriolis's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Eilonwy View Post
    Do NTs only think in terms of debate? In other words, every communication is part of a zero-sum game (win/lose, dominate/submit)? Or does discussion exist in the NT vocabulary?
    I guarantee when I ask a clerk in the grocery store where I can find artichoke hearts, I am not looking for debate. So no, every communication is not viewed as a debate. (See what I did there, though? More below.)

    At the risk of speaking for NTs, or perhaps just for INTJs, though, we don't do well with being told we are wrong. We have to be shown we are wrong - whether on a deep philosophical topic, or on a simple logistical matter like whether the restaurant you suggest we go to is open on Mondays. We also don't have much patience with sloppy reasoning, faulty assumptions, unsupportable generalizations, or clinging to debunked facts. It is our tendency to call out such things that often leads others to perceive our discussion style as "debate" rather than discussion. The only winner we want to see, though, is the truth, or the right answer, "right" here being the one that will actually work (e.g. we don't waste time going to a restaurant that is closed). If you teach us something new, or show us where we were in error, we usually will count ourselves among the winners, so no, it is very much not a zero sum game. We all win if we come away knowing more, and having a perspective closer to the truth.
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  8. #8

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    Quote Originally Posted by Eilonwy View Post
    Ha! No. It's safe to deny it.
    Sometimes it's debate, other times it's discussion where the latter can be construed as the former, reliant on how sensitive the individual to blunt questions.
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  9. #9
    hamburger fairy Ogata's Avatar
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    Eh, if they're worth talking to, their viewpoint is worth considering. A debate doesn't have to be win/lose. A zero sum game is really more like an argument.
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  10. #10
    Senior Member ceecee's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Eilonwy View Post
    Do NTs only think in terms of debate? In other words, every communication is part of a zero-sum game (win/lose, dominate/submit)? Or does discussion exist in the NT vocabulary?
    Far more discussions and communications than debate. I don't have the energy or tolerance for more.
    I like to rock n' roll all night and *part* of every day. I usually have errands... I can only rock from like 1-3.
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