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[MBTI General] Help Economica determine S/N for an EXFP

Economica

Dhampyr
Joined
Apr 23, 2007
Messages
2,054
MBTI Type
INTJ
... Not to be confused with this thread: Help me determine S/N for an EXTP (He turned out to be an ENTP, by the way.)

Note: I've made this a Personal Thread in order to keep it members-only because it contains just a little too much personal (identifying) information. Mods, if this is the wrong place for it, then just please don't move it to a public forum.

---

I was writing in my blog about an old flame of mine...:

Some years ago I had something approximating a fling with an ENFP man with decided alpha male qualities - I actually thought he was INTX or ISTP, he projected that kind of no-nonsense, my-way aura, but in a catching-up Facebook exchange we had a year ago he wrote:

<quote cut because it is reproduced below>

... When I realized that I have perhaps been too hasty in closing the case regarding his type.

Here's some background information: He's now 32. Apart from holding some kind of economics-related degree the particulars of which I'm not sure of (i.e. whether it is from a university or a business school, its length, its difficulty) he is also the lead singer of a subcultural band that does decently (in 2005 they toured Europe as the opening act for one of the biggest bands in the genre) although not well enough that the band members can quit their day jobs. The band's live performances are very intricate and <vibe alert> as the centerpiece he is an intense performer; he's made up and dressed in costume and he makes few, slow, calculated movements (as opposed to, say, moving spontaneously and energetically to the music thus encouraging the audience to do to the same like some other lead singers do).

Here are two of his messages (this exchange is from December when I was still in my last relationship):

Hi there ^^

Starting off with the most relevant question, I'm an ENFP according to your linked test <humanmetrics>. The thing is, I recalled I did a Myers-Briggs some seven years ago and actually managed to find the results in an old stack of papers. At that time I ended up an ESFP.

Your prediction about my skepticism towards personality tests such as M-B is correct, although I'm not exactly busy digging up links to prove them wrong. Instead, I trust intelligent people such as yourself to immediately see the limits of such tests, which you obviously already have. <:whistling: ;)> For example, the whole dimension of E/I is, in my perhaps not so humble opinion, much better explored by simply talking to an individual for five minutes rather than having them fill in a form. The same goes for the other dimensions too - why not just interview the person? That way you'd also avoid the potential problem of lying, or people who don't possess enough self-insight to give a correct description of themselves.

What line of work are you interested in once you finish your master thesis? What type of company? I don't recall exactly what you study, but I reckon it's BA of some kind?

As for myself, I'm a senior recruiter <...> for a company that <...>. Last Friday we had our annual (no shit?) x-mas party and while we were waiting for a cab to take us from one place to another, I looked out over the rooftops of <my city> and suddenly came to think of you. So the next time I logged into Facebook I tried searching you, but I couldn't think of anything to write so I - for the first time - used the poke function. So there you have it ^^

It's good to hear that you and <name of my ex> are still sticking together. It's hard enough to find someone you get along with, so once you do you might as well make it last.

Oh, <name of his friend> just rang my doorbell. We're gonna spend the night playing video games and drinking beer. Talk to you soon!

All the best,
<name>

teamtechnology link: "From this table, you can see that the two highest scoring types are ENFJ and ESFJ." <FWIW, I really don't think he is a J if for no other reason than the chemistry between us. Other Js and I do not tend to get along romantically.>

The ISTP description portrays a person who's inwardly decisive and who is more focused on mechanics than emotions - i.e., not a very good description of myself. I'm not surprised if I might come across as someone who is guided by rationality, simply because reason and logic come very easily for me. No matter how rational a person is, I'm usually comfortable following that person's train of thought. Nevertheless, I depend a lot more on empathy than logic in everything I do. And to be quite honest, I hardly ever have use for the top 20% of my IQ, except for when I solve the chess problem in the morning paper.

Hence, I can see why you're frustrated over choosing a suitable career for yourself. I worked a few years as a business analyst for a multi national corporation. I was in charge of preparing plans for market introductions and expansions, gathering and analyzing market and competitor information and making sector forecasts. This might sound as as a position that depends on a sharp analytical mind, but nooo. Gathering info and boiling it down to solid reports was the easy part of my work - convincing top management to do as I proposed was the tough part. I did so not by being an excellent analyst but by behaving in a way that pleased the CEO (and as people around him noticed his approval of me, they too had to approve of my reports). I acted the way I assumed he did when he was my age, allowing him to see a young self in me. He liked me, therefore he listened to what I had to say. I recently read in the newspaper that the corporation, which he still leads, has decided to invest several hundred MUSD in the very two markets that I specifically advised him to focus on. I can honestly say that most of the analyses behind my recommendations were a waste of time in the sense that no-one even bothered to read them; I had to reduce my reports to PPT presentations before they were even presented to the executive team. And I had to formulate the bullets in words that I knew they liked (you know, a particular corporate lingo) in order to have their ear - not the opposite of analysis, of course, but not exactly a decision making process based on logic and reason either.

If you prefer analysis to psychology, I'd not pursue a corporate career if I were you. But maybe you could do like me and find an outlet for your analytical mind outside work? If not, I'm afraid you'd better consider again the econ-heavy jobs, where there actually is a demand for real analysis (as opposed to the quasi, tell-us-what-we-want-to-hear analysis). Otherwise you might end up frustrated over the format always being more important than the contents.

Back to personality traits, I'm an Extrovert. I prefer company to solitude, I build both my career and personal success on relations rather than my individual performance, and I tend to be visible in social contexts - either as a leader or an active participant. I learn more from talking to others than from analyzing my own behaviour. This really has very little to do with my analyzing skills - it's more a matter of preference.

Now to the interesting question: what combination of letters represents you best, and what are your thoughts on these traits in regard to your own personality?

A merry xmas to you ^^
/<name>

I'd say he was an ENFP but given his ESFP test result on the official MBTI and the ESFJ runner-up result on the teamtechnology test, I figure I should revisit his type.

So, thoughts? :) I'd especially appreciate hearing from people with experience with intelligent, educated and well-developed ESFP men; the ones I know (for sure, that is ;)) are unfortunately lacking in at least one of those three departments.
 

Angry Ayrab

New member
Joined
Mar 31, 2008
Messages
600
MBTI Type
ENFP
screams of mature ENFP to me. I just gather this from the way he communicates, I understand what he is saying and why he is saying it.

none the less, it is just a guess still. good luck with it, sounds like a nice guy.
 
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