[ENTJ] What would a INTJ + ENTJ relationship be?

[Lark]

Rick and Morty.

 

[Lark]

Rick and Morty.

 

[Agent Washington]

"Ah yes, I would like an INTJ X ENTJ Pizza"
"You mean the 'Power Struggle Supreme'?"
"Yes, that's the one. Does it come with a side of 'Nobody Shows Any Vulnerability?'"
"Yes, it comes with a side of that, as well as a large ordering of 'EGO 100'."
"I'll take that with an extra large 'Both of Us Must Have Things Our Own Way'. Thanks a bunch!"

...So, no.

 

[rav3n]

"Ah yes, I would like an INTJ X ENTJ Pizza"
"You mean the 'Power Struggle Supreme'?"
"Yes, that's the one. Does it come with a side of 'Nobody Shows Any Vulnerability?'"
"Yes, it comes with a side of that, as well as a large ordering of "EGO 100."
"I'll take that. Thanks a bunch!"

...So, no.

*dies laughing* Overt/covert power struggle.

Oddly, as an ENTJ, when someone shows me their soft authentic underbelly, my defenses go down. Come at me aggressively and/or manipulatively/in a disingenuous manner, overtly or especially covertly and look out, it's a scorched earth policy!

 

[Agent Washington]

*dies laughing* Overt/covert power struggle.

Oddly, as an ENTJ, when someone shows me their soft authentic underbelly, my defenses go down. Come at me aggressively and/or manipulatively/in a disingenuous manner, overtly or especially covertly and look out, it's a scorched earth policy!

>soft authentic underbelly

... looks pointedly at the NFs

 

[rav3n]

>soft authentic underbelly

... looks pointedly at the NFs

Moreso INTPs when they finally let you in since they're less likely to be hurt by honest responses.

 

[INTJMom]

"Ah yes, I would like an INTJ X ENTJ Pizza"
"You mean the 'Power Struggle Supreme'?"
"Yes, that's the one. Does it come with a side of 'Nobody Shows Any Vulnerability?'"
"Yes, it comes with a side of that, as well as a large ordering of 'EGO 100'."
"I'll take that with an extra large 'Both of Us Must Have Things Our Own Way'. Thanks a bunch!"

...So, no.

Hahahaha!
You're funny!

 

[Ashtart]

The attitudes will have to be different, that is the preference. Not the function, the function stays the same, but the preference of the attitude is what we choose and what feels natural.

So if one is Fi, then the suitable match would be Fe. In the long run the Fi <> Fe is going to work much better than Fi <> Ni, because when Te kicks in, it's going to trample all over Fi. Even your link confirms it. And this is the problem with the INTJ <> INFP match. They (INFPs) literally start shivering of fear, of what I will say next, because it hurts their feelings. There is even an example of me and an INFP on this forum, where I got slapped for "trolling", when I was just being me. If you understood the functions, you would start to understand what I'm trying to tell you here. But because you're an INFJ, you will find it difficult to understand and accept my point of view, because you're an INFJ. So I will leave it at that.

Yes MBTI, is a system and that is what INTJs are good at, where as the INFJ, would be very good people person, and don't need the MBTI to tell them how to deal with people. But this is not what this thread is about, this thread is about the MBTI system and your link happened contain INFP and INTJ information, which I find to be unrealistic. Because to get an INFP to stick with an INTJ is like strapping them in an electric chair to stay. Who is it really fair on? So if they claim they are INFP and INTJ, then I would seriously doubt the accuracy of the INFP or INTJ typing.

Yeah maybe if they INFPs stuck around, individuation would happen faster, but like Jung said, you need to access them through their main function, which is not the speciality of the INTJ.

Yes, and that was me speaking about a relationship between an inFj and INFP, and How a Ni and Fi relationship CAN work.. Not INTJ. I didn't even mentioned INTJs in my post about love relationships. I just quoted you because I said that I disagree with you when you say that a good relationship happens when the two people share the same dichotomy as dom.

 

[INTJMom]

... this thread is about the MBTI system and your link happened contain INFP and INTJ information, which I find to be unrealistic. Because to get an INFP to stick with an INTJ is like strapping them in an electric chair to stay. Who is it really fair on? So if they claim they are INFP and INTJ, then I would seriously doubt the accuracy of the INFP or INTJ typing.
...

When you put it THAT way, I guess an INFP mate would not be good for me. A couple of things about my sister would make it impossible for me to married to a man who acted the same way.

#1 - conspiracy theories - After my sister has told me 15 ways the world is going to melt into a pile of radioactive mush any second now, I just want to go to bed and die. Literally.
#2 - plays with evil - In her INFP-world-of-her-own-making, she takes evil scary things, redefines them, controls them and therefore is no longer afraid of them anymore. I do the same thing, but NOT THE SAME WAY. I CAN'T do it her way and I'm sure she can't do it my way.

So really, the electric chair would work both ways.

btw [MENTION=20044]chubber[/MENTION]: Do you have an opinion about which MBTI type would be best for a life-long marriage for an INTJ?

 

[Ashtart]

#1 - conspiracy theories - After my sister has told me 15 ways the world is going to melt into a pile of radioactive mush any second now, I just want to go to bed and die. Literally.

This look a bit like an INTJ in some sort of Ni-Fi loop xD

 

[chubber]

When you put it THAT way, I guess an INFP mate would not be good for me. A couple of things about my sister would make it impossible for me to married to a man who acted the same way.

#1 - conspiracy theories - After my sister has told me 15 ways the world is going to melt into a pile of radioactive mush any second now, I just want to go to bed and die. Literally.
#2 - plays with evil - In her INFP-world-of-her-own-making, she takes evil scary things, redefines them, controls them and therefore is no longer afraid of them anymore. I do the same thing, but NOT THE SAME WAY. I CAN'T do it her way and I'm sure she can't do it my way.

So really, the electric chair would work both ways.

btw [MENTION=20044]chubber[/MENTION]: Do you have an opinion about which MBTI type would be best for a life-long marriage for an INTJ?

I'm not sure if what you are describing is INFP, maybe ISTJ?

So here is the description of the INTJ.

INTJ

1. Introverted intuition - Your dominant attitude of consciousness

Your general attitude towards life is governed by subjective factors with subjective determinants being the decisive ones rather than the external conditions. Your intuition (known as unconscious perception) is in line with your general attitude of consciousness (introverted) and is also concerned with your own, subjective, perception of external reality/objects. Such subjective perceptions are psychological and are not a physical reality.

These inner objects appear to your intuitive perception as subjective images of things. However, these contents are not accessible to experience through sensation. For you the subjective factor becomes the decisive factor and your perception is never limited by the external possibilities. Because intuition excludes the co-operation of sensation the images appear as though detached from the subject, as though existing in themselves without relation to the person.

As an introverted intuitive you move from image to image, chasing after every possibility without establishing any connection between the event and yourself. Your introverted intuition captures the images which arise prior to experiencing it in reality. It comes from the inherited foundations of your unconscious mind. Your introverted intuition provides information for the understanding of general occurrences: it can even foresee new possibilities in more or less clear outline, as well as the event which later actually transpires.

However, as an introverted intuitive you stop at perception; perception is your principal activity. The problem arises when you try to relate yourself to your vision; the symbolism is unadapted to the actual present-day reality. You remain unintelligible and your language is too subjective for anyone to understand you. Your argument may lack convincing reason. Your voice is like the 'voice of one crying in the wilderness'.

As a result, you may feel frustrated and become impulsive and unrestrained either by exhibiting psychosomatic symptoms or by obsessing about your ties with other objects or people.

Since your main activity is directed within, nothing is outwardly visible but reserve, secretiveness, lack of sympathy, or uncertainty, and an apparently groundless perplexity. When anything does come to the surface, is received with prejudice. Accordingly you are mostly underestimated, or at least misunderstood. To the same degree as you fail to understand yourself you are also powerless to understand why you are so constantly undervalued by public opinion.

You may not see that your outward-going expression is enchanted by the abundance of subjective events. What happens there is so captivating, and of such inexhaustible attraction, that you may not appreciate the fact that your way of communicating it does not portray your experience as it comes to you. People may lose patience with your fragmented communication, lack of conviction and warmth of expression. In fact you may show quite a brusque, repelling demeanour towards the outer world, although you are quite unaware, and have not the least intention of showing it.

All of this happens because is hard for you to translate your inner experience into intelligible language. Life may present itself with overwhelming external difficulties, which have a very sobering effect on your inner world and occasionally bring to light a more human expression. Viewed from a higher standpoint, you are the living evidence to the fact that this world is not purely external but also it exists within. Your life teaches more than your words.

2. Extraverted thinking - Your auxiliary function

Your dominant attitude (introverted intuition) is supported by the auxiliary function of extraverted (objective) thinking. Extraverted thinking grounds you and ultimately helps you analyse what your introverted intuition brings in order to give it a rational form. As an extraverted thinker your life is mainly ruled by reflective thinking. This means that every important action you take proceeds from intellectually considered motives. The aim of your interactions is to bring your life activities into relation with intellectual conclusions, which are always orientated by objective data (whether objective facts or generally valid ideas). Your decisions are based on either the actual objective reality or on the objectively orientated, intellectual formula. By this formula are good and evil measured, and beauty and ugliness determined. All is right that corresponds with this formula; all is wrong that contradicts it; and everything that is neutral to it is purely accidental.

Because to you this formula seems to correspond with the meaning of the world, it also becomes a world-law whose realisation must be achieved at all times and seasons, both individually and collectively. You are demanding that others submit to and obey this formula. Any person who refuses to obey is wrong - he is resisting the world-law, and is, therefore, unreasonable, immoral, and without a conscience. This moral code forbids you to tolerate exceptions; this ideal must, under all the circumstances, be realised. In your eyes it is the purest conceivable formulation of objective reality, and, therefore, must also be generally valid truth, quite indispensable for the salvation of man.

Your position has nothing to do with a great love for your neighbour, but rather from a higher standpoint of justice and truth. Everything that appears to invalidate this formula is mere imperfection, an accidental miss-fire, something to be eliminated on the next occasion, or, in the event of further failure, then clearly a sickness.

If as an extraverted thinker you expand your formula to accommodate feeling-type decisions you may play a useful role in social life, either as a reformer or as a propagator of important innovations. But the more rigid the formula, the more you can develop into a grumbler, a crafty reasoner, and a self-righteous critic, who would like to impress both yourself and others into one schema. The majority of extraverted thinkers fall between these two extremes.

The more extreme the tests score the more dictatorial and tyrannical the extraverted thinking is in its manifestation. Usually it is the nearest relatives who have to taste the most disagreeable results of your extraverted formula, since they are the first to be unmercifully blessed with it. But above all you yourself are the one who suffers the most.

In the first place, all forms dependent upon feeling will become repressed in your type, for instance, aesthetic activities, taste, artistic sense, the art of friendship, etc. Irrational forms such as religious experiences, passions and the like can be obliterated even to the point of complete unconsciousness. Those forms dependent on feeling with have to lead an existence that is largely unconscious. Sometimes the forms of life repressed by your intellectual attitude is largely unconscious. Sometimes the forms of life repressed by your intellectual attitude can reach a definite intensity turning into neurosis. In most cases, however, it does not go so far, because you will instinctively mitigate it via reasoning. In this way a safety-valve is created.

Such feeling tendencies or functions as are excluded from any participation and kept in a relatively undeveloped state and sometimes greatly distorted as they cannot be entirely eliminated. A part of the feeling remains insubordinate, and therefore must be repressed. When repression succeeds it works subconsciously in opposition to your aim, even producing effects whose causation is a complete enigma to you. For example, purely ethical reasons may lead you into critical situations, which sometimes appear decided by other than ethical motives. Your need to save the day often leads you to employ means which only tend to precipitate what you most desire to avoid. Extraverted idealists, in their desire to assist humanity is so consuming that they will not shrink from any lying and dishonest means in the pursuit of their ideal. This is sanctioned by the formula "the end justifies the means". This is how a suppressed feeling-function, operating seductively and unconsciously, could bring you into trouble with others or society.

Other manifestation of suppression of feeling is an extreme rational, impersonal attitude where you can do a very considerable wrong to your own personal interests. You may neglect your health, lose social position, you may be wronged morally and financially, all in the service of an ideal. Your immediate family may see you as dictatorial, whiles the outer world will you as humane and kind.

Your unconscious feelings can be highly personal and oversensitive, giving rise to the prejudices, e.g. a tendency to defend by making negative guesses regarding the qualities of others in order to invalidate their arguments beforehand. As a result of this unconscious sensitiveness, your expression and tone frequently can become sharp, pointed, aggressive, and insinuated. The suppressed feelings bring resentment: no matter how generous your sacrifice is your corresponding feelings are petty, suspicious, cross-grained, and conservative.

The more prejudice in your thinking the more feelings are repressed and in return the more rigidly dogmatic your intellectual stand point. Thinking in an extreme extroverted thinker can gain the religious character of absoluteness. It becomes, as it were, an intellectual superstition. Everything else is repressed but thought forms a counter-position, giving rise to paroxysms of doubt. As a defence against doubt, the conscious attitude grows fanatical. Fanaticism, after all, is merely overcompensated doubt. For example an extreme irrationality develops, in opposition to the conscious rationalism, or it becomes highly archaic and superstitious, in opposition to a conscious standpoint imbued with modern science.

Your thought as the thought of the extraverted thinking type is positive, i.e. it produces. It either leads to new facts or to general conception. Your judgement is generally synthetic. Even when you analyse you construct, because you always advance beyond analysis to a new combination, or a further conception which re-unites the analysed material in a new way or you add something further to the given material. You always have to substitute a fresh value for the one that is demolished.

This quality is due to the fact that thought is the main channel into which your energy flows, a constant pondering and brooding upon things past and gone, in an effort to analyse and digest them.

3. The introverted Feeling Type - Your tertiary function

As an introverted feeling type you have a preference for externalising your thinking versus feeling, but this doesn't mean that you are an emotionless being. In fact regardless of how powerful your emotions are you often get lost in translation, because your feeling function is introverted and the thinking is extraverted for all to see. Therefore to many people you will appear detached, clinical and flat in your emotional repertoire.

This situation happens because introverted feeling is concerned mostly with subjective preconditions and not much with being in line with commonly shared expressed feelings about objective reality. Therefore your expressed feelings often depreciate the reality out there in an effort to stand above it and give a reality to the underlying images. It is as if you strive after an inner intensity and the objects in reality contribute only as a stimulus. This introverted feeling makes you silent and difficult to access, it makes you shrink from the brutality of reality on order to give depth of feeling to the inner subjective experience/image. You tend to put forward negative-feeling judgements or assume an air of profound indifference, as a measure of self-defence.

In your relationships with people you generally limit your emotional investments in a small number of individuals - more focused and more discriminating in your approach. This is perhaps why you show little interest in social networking and typically invest yourself emotionally in your family along with very few friends. Your introverted feeling type may also propel you to invest a great deal of time in acquiring self-knowledge and to understand who you are as unique individual.

4. Extroverted Sensation - Your inferior function

Sensation - sometimes called repressed function, it is most unconscious of the four functions. It is also the most difficult to access, understand, and integrate. Extraverted Sensing makes you less attuned to the details or concrete elements of life. While you take in plenty of sensory data from the outside world, you intuitively synthesise without the necessarily. registering particular environmental details. Your dominant function, the introverted intuition, will interpret the sensory information. This is why you may often seem oblivious to the details of your surroundings.

However, you are not unaffected by, or insensitive to, your physical environment but still absorbing and subconsciously registering a breadth of environmental stimuli. You are quite permeable and sensitive to the environment. This is why you know things without realising how you came to know them. This apparent passive absorption of information can also make you susceptible to over stimulation in noisy chaotic circumstances.

Sometimes this disconnect from the world may make you feel like a stranger in the world, even when it comes to experiences such as trying new foods, drugs, or physical activities. Doing so can seem too risky or unpredictable to you. It depends on you to become more open to novelty.

Conclusion

Your personality strength is deep perception. You are naturally attuned to "the big picture" and cannot help but see how everything is interconnected. Your ability to perceive deep patterns and causal relationships has helped you achieve mastery in your work.

With your dominant function - introverted intuition your typical mode of operation is quite impressionistic. Rather than noticing or concerning with the details of the world around you. Your existence is more cerebral or dreamlike which can lead you to feel estranged from their physical environment. People get a sense about you that you seem to "live in your own world." Immersed in your own mind and interests, you can be oblivious to social norms or other practical aspects of life. While incredibly "book smart," you may fall short when it comes to social or "street smarts" due to your introverted feeling function.

Further complicating your social life is your extraverted thinking. This makes you loathe unfamiliar social situations. You find it painfully difficult to engage in any measure of "small talk" with strangers. This further intensifies their sense of being "different" from their peers.

As you get older you may find yourself in need to find balance of challenge and stimulation and a sense of progress toward a meaningful goal. In a state of flow you strive to "becoming one with" the activity. This is most likely to emerge when you perform activities that engage your dominant and auxiliary functions.

I just typed a whole paragraph only for me to click wrongly on the tab and kill the whole message, while searching for this above text.

I am going to have to cut it short and say that, in most texts I've ready it always sounded like, INTJ must stop being INTJ and the other party must try to meet you half way and stop being scared.

I like ESFJs, but guess what, their Ne, but when ESFJs uses Ne, they are actually using it from an unconscious point, which means, they are actually scared in that moment, yet they all act fine and calm, well at least to me, I'm not a S, so I wouldn't observe them while I'm talking (again another thing of Te). It only takes a week for them to run away.

INFPs, takes 2 months, then they just had about enough, and their inferior Te shows, like an infantile, harsh and critical, loud. You can see they don't have much experience with it, and they die right after realising they just did that. But only with time and age, and experience, if they allow individuation to happen, then yes, they too will see that there is nothing to be afraid of Te.

So would the ENxP be a better match? I think so yes, well they at least will keep my curiosity, not that I'm saying ESxP won't, but the point is, I must be as uninteresting to them, as they are to me. ISxJs are fun to play with, until I realise, their Ne is inferior, and comes from a place of negativity and fear. So it also becomes too much at that point for me. They will have to do their individuation without me.

I like all types, but I wish INTJs were more common, then INTJs wouldn't have to explain themselves so often, which in itself is already difficult, because they have such a hard time already, not only reading other people, but also themselves.

Is ENFP the holy grail? I think it keeps things interesting, because at some point Te is going trample over Fi and there is some heated debate or they run away, and Te never seems to win over Fi. I think that is what keeps it interesting, the never ending/never winning battle. But is it healthy? Both types have to learn, INTJ how to do Fi in a good way, ENFP, how to use Te in a good way etc.

ENTPs? I want to date one and see, they should appear warmer in nature because of Fe. Not sure how much of interest they will keep, both ways. I want to try though.

ENFJs, nothing sticks to them, I think they are phoney, eventually I call them out on it, and this is not to say, that INFPs can't appear briefly like an ENFJ either. (then Te slams) BOOM, 2012 end of the world stuff.

Again preferences the attitude: How everyday stress brings out our hidden personality by Noami L. Quenk, Page 40

By the same token, when people use a function in their own less preferred attitude, they may experience a sense of “wrongness” or discomfort with themselves. You will recall that the Jung-Meyers approach specifies that we are free to use each of the four functions – S, N, T and F – in both the attitudes of Extraversion and Introversion at least some of the time. Such flows of energy are necessary for good adaptation in an active, dynamic psychological system. Thus, an INFP may have a preference for introverting Feeling and extraverting Intuition, but is free to extravert Feeling on occasion and to introvert Intuition when that is desirable. For example, an INFP may speak to a group of people about his or her strong values and may spend time thinking about new ideas, theories, and possibilities without communicating them ot others in any way. He or she is also free to invert inferior Thinking (typically extraverted in an INFP) and to use tertiary Sensing in either the Extraverted or Introverted attitude. Similarly, an ESTJ, whose typical type dynamics suggest habitual use of Extraverted Thinking and Introverted Sensing, is able to introvert Thinking by silently considering the logical consequences of a decision and to extravert the Sensing by seeking out sensory experiences in the outside world as fully as possible. Nevertheless, because attitude determines the sphere in which a function operates – the outer world or the inner world – when we use a function in the less – preferred attitude we find ourselves in a foreign land, full of uncertainty and lacking in confidence. We feel and behave differently and may appear different to others. This is especially true when function question the dominant one.

the INFP story: Page 39

Is Feeling Extraverted or Introverted? George, an ENFJ (dominant Extraverted Feeling), hired Ellen, an INFP (dominant Introverted Feeling), to edit his manuscript. Ellen was gratified to learn that the edited manuscript had been accepted for publication by a prestigious university press. The news confirmed her feeling that she had done a good job. She was embarrassed, however, when George, who had already paid her for her work, took her out to dinner and presented her with an expensive gift to show his appreciation. Rather than increasing her confidence in her work, this seemingly excessive display of gratitude made Ellen distrust George’s judgement of her. His unbounded enthusiasm seemed to indicate to her a lack of discrimination.

This is a good example of how Introverted Feeling types focus on inner harmony and being at peace within themselves, whereas Extraverted Feeling types devote their energy to maintaining harmony in the outer world. George was merely sharing his delight in his success with someone he felt had contributed greatly to it. He would have been puzzled and shocked had he known about Ellen’s reaction, which she did not reveal to him.

 

[1487610420]

The Underwoods

 

[INTJMom]

The Underwoods

:hi: phobik! :hi:

 

[INTJMom]

I'm not sure if what you are describing is INFP, maybe ISTJ?

I am describing my INFP sister. There is no question she is INFP.
I described 2 aspects of her behavior which I could not endure for long if I had to live with her.
I don't know which part of being an INFP make her like that; all I know is, I could not endure it.
Perhaps it is extraverted intuition.

So here is the description of the INTJ.

Where did you find that text? I would like to visit the website.

I just typed a whole paragraph only for me to click wrongly on the tab and kill the whole message, while searching for this above text.

I hate it when that happens!!! So frustrating... after you already spent your train of thought!

I am going to have to cut it short and say that, in most texts I've ready it always sounded like, INTJ must stop being INTJ and the other party must try to meet you half way and stop being scared.

I like ESFJs, but guess what, their Ne, but when ESFJs uses Ne, they are actually using it from an unconscious point, which means, they are actually scared in that moment, yet they all act fine and calm, well at least to me, I'm not a S, so I wouldn't observe them while I'm talking (again another thing of Te). It only takes a week for them to run away.

INFPs, takes 2 months, then they just had about enough, and their inferior Te shows, like an infantile, harsh and critical, loud. You can see they don't have much experience with it, and they die right after realising they just did that. But only with time and age, and experience, if they allow individuation to happen, then yes, they too will see that there is nothing to be afraid of Te.

So would the ENxP be a better match? I think so yes, well they at least will keep my curiosity, not that I'm saying ESxP won't, but the point is, I must be as uninteresting to them, as they are to me. ISxJs are fun to play with, until I realise, their Ne is inferior, and comes from a place of negativity and fear. So it also becomes too much at that point for me. They will have to do their individuation without me.

I like all types, but I wish INTJs were more common, then INTJs wouldn't have to explain themselves so often, which in itself is already difficult, because they have such a hard time already, not only reading other people, but also themselves.

Is ENFP the holy grail? I think it keeps things interesting, because at some point Te is going trample over Fi and there is some heated debate or they run away, and Te never seems to win over Fi. I think that is what keeps it interesting, the never ending/never winning battle. But is it healthy? Both types have to learn, INTJ how to do Fi in a good way, ENFP, how to use Te in a good way etc.

ENTPs? I want to date one and see, they should appear warmer in nature because of Fe. Not sure how much of interest they will keep, both ways. I want to try though.

ENFJs, nothing sticks to them, I think they are phoney, eventually I call them out on it, and this is not to say, that INFPs can't appear briefly like an ENFJ either. (then Te slams) BOOM, 2012 end of the world stuff.

Again preferences the attitude: How everyday stress brings out our hidden personality by Noami L. Quenk, Page 40

the INFP story: Page 39

So you the short answer is, you haven't figured out what is the perfect match for INTJ.
Perhaps we just can't get along with anybody.
I was married for 27 years to an ISTP.
It was great until he had a mid-life crisis and became a tyrant.
We weren't really soul-mates, though.
I loved that "what you see is what you get".
He was very honest, loyal; he had a lot of really great qualities, but he complained too much and he crushed my spirit a lot.
I guess I should stay single.

 

[INTJMom]

This look a bit like an INTJ in some sort of Ni-Fi loop xD

I thought the fact that INFPs are conspiracy theorists was common knowledge.
Here is a partial quote from an INFP on another site;
"I've been reading different conspiracy forums for about 13 years. I love reading different *possibilities* about what information "appears" to be in front of me. For me, it's very interesting, somewhat exciting."

See. INFPs think it's "fun", but MY brain thinks, "Wow if that's true, I don't want to live anymore!"

 

[Ashtart]

I thought the fact that INFPs are conspiracy theorists was common knowledge.
Here is a partial quote from an INFP on another site;
"I've been reading different conspiracy forums for about 13 years. I love reading different *possibilities* about what information "appears" to be in front of me. For me, it's very interesting, somewhat exciting."

See. INFPs think it's "fun", but MY brain thinks, "Wow if that's true, I don't want to live anymore!"

I see. Interesting.

 

[chubber]

I am describing my INFP sister. There is no question she is INFP.
I described 2 aspects of her behavior which I could not endure for long if I had to live with her.
I don't know which part of being an INFP make her like that; all I know is, I could not endure it.
Perhaps it is extraverted intuition.

Well, I think in my previous post I said, I'm thumb sucking, and I left it out. But I don't know your sister, but I also know that, not all is what it seems... N-thing, refusing to accept what is.

Where did you find that text? I would like to visit the website.

That's my 3 year personal report. I thought I share it here, so that it can dispel all magical INTJ myths and nonsense that people have seemed to created for INTJs to live up to. I was so frustrated that nobody seems to understand me and why I don't understand them. This report comes from, "Personality Types" by GC Jung and the e-book "16 Personality Types" by Dr A.J. Drenth. Perhaps that can help your search.

I hate it when that happens!!! So frustrating... after you already spent your train of thought!

Yes, it was a pain, and usually if you open up the tab from history then the text is still there, but it didn't Hence why I didn't bother to write it somewhere else first that provides auto save. (maybe the auto save feature is broken too? )

So you the short answer is, you haven't figured out what is the perfect match for INTJ.
Perhaps we just can't get along with anybody.
I was married for 27 years to an ISTP.
It was great until he had a mid-life crisis and became a tyrant.
We weren't really soul-mates, though.
I loved that "what you see is what you get".
He was very honest, loyal; he had a lot of really great qualities, but he complained too much and he crushed my spirit a lot.
I guess I should stay single.

Do I think there is a perfect type? No, I see all types needs a key to open them up, and I like to think nothing is impossible, just need the right key. Some keys are just easier to get it going. For example going more in depth about ESxPs

And I'll use socionics to illustrate my point.

Victor Gulenko, "Criteria of reciprocity"

Cautious comfort

Interesting relations, in which the partners are afraid to get closer because they feel that by doing so comfort will dissipate. After pleasantly communicating for some time, the partners don't know how to proceed next. At times, partners privaely take note some unpleasant moments in behavior of each other. However, these unpleasant moments and hurdles are often not discussed openly and not brought up to attention of the partner. In matters of duties and responsibilities, the work is usually distributed according to temperament. Disagreements are usually resolved through compromise and through mutual concessions.

Binary signs of intertype relations

Semi-duality is much more difficult to establish than duality. Getting closer is not easy and takes a long period of time. Third parties generate confusion and disturb emotional balance in a semi-dual pair. Insularity in this pair promotes its stability.

In semi-dual relations, mutual comfort and convenience are of primary importance. Misunderstandings in communication periodically disturb these relations. There is an impression that in these relations fate plays a special role - some irrational principle seems to define their development. Physical health of partners may likewise fluctuate.

Turbulent emotional atmosphere is destructive to semi-dual relations. They must be imbued with the spirit of cooperation, reason and benefit derived from mutual undertakings, as well as united opposition waged against external hardships and dangers. There should be fewer emotional outbursts and more productive undertakings, then semi-duality will strengthen and provide for a special kind of charm of unemotional comfort.

Semi-duality relations exacerbate in partners awareness of their body, their physical condition. Relaxation in semi-duality relationship is not as easy as in dual relations. Material well-being of the pair is provided by collaborative effort. This especially concerns the cases when semi-duality combines two intuitive types. Semi-duals are able to realistically assess their chances of success and take up only those matters that will bring quick benefits.
Dynamics of semi-dual relations are perceived by both partners acutely. There is a sharp contrast between leisure and work. Disruptions in relations usually cause more confusion than in duality relations. Partners are as if drawn to make relations more dynamic and do things which are surprising for the other.

Semi-dual relations contribute to the preservation of one's own individuality. In these relations partners hone their personal skills. While they may consult with each other, each leads his or her own affairs. Relations can be well managed and have a tendency for self-correction.

Advice for getting along

Be patient, don't force events. Remember that getting close to each other is a very slow process in these relations. Try to spend more free time together. In semi-dual relations there is intensification of physical sensitivity and desire for tangible contact.

Be more considerate in relation to each other. Avoid anything that can cause emotional instability. Deal with disagreements right away. Try to rely more on logic. Avoid middle-men in these relations and deal with each other directly. Protect one another from negative influence of any hostile people.

In semi-dual relations there are periodic break downs caused by the fact that partners will try to process their feelings separately and individually concerning the same events. In this case, don't show much emotions - positive or negative - simply switch your attention to the next subject.

I know an ESTP in the office, and we are now on year 2, 4 months, and we are now at the stage of, saying "have a nice day", at some random interval. That's the most we've talked since we met. We hardly say anything, she is as quiet as a mouse and she is an ESTP. Getting to type someone because she is quiet doesn't reflect the functions.

So here is how the ESFP interaction works in duality.

Nature has played a little trick on us. It is difficult to notice your Dual partner among all the other types and even easier to pass them by. Usually during first contact extroverts think about their introvert Dual as ordinary and simple, therefore not deserving their personal attention. In return introverts consider their extrovert Dual to be too good for them and therefore unattainable. Both positions usually belong to people who had a lack of Duality interaction during childhood.

So why ESTP when ESFP is the dual?

R.K. Sedih, "Informational psychoanalysis"

In these relations there is always an opportunity to help one another. This is especially easy when the focus is on functions that the partners share in common. These functions promote semi-duals to become close, however, other aspects of these relations may be rough. If the circumstances are favorable, partners will have time to get to know and get used to one another and establish a strong connection. In such conditions, they can learn to avoid the pitfalls of this type of relations. Semi-duality can be very exquisite and deep type of relations, which is why some socionists point out that it is best to be with a good semi-dual rather than a poor dual.

Is there a perfect partner? I don't think so, either party needs to adapt to something. And I sometimes wonder, what is the point of knowing all of this, when the other party doesn't want to meet you half way. The only answer then is to walk away. Which isn't always easy, because I don't like giving up.

So why would ESFP be better? Because the shadow of the INTJ is ESFP, so individuation would lead to being an ESFP, the ESFP would help this. Why would ENFP be better? Well they would be open to possibilities, just like the ESxPs, but not grounded on the external world. E.g. theoretical. Yes so they are good with that. But the ENFP's individuation is the ISTJ, and that means, more strict and rules and planning everything to death process they wish to follow. It feels like a straight jacket to me again. With the ESxP I can't be theoretical with, in the beginning, but over time they will be.

ENTJ and INTJ, seems like good friends.

ENTPs I sometimes see as conspiracy theorists, or ISFJs who's individuation becomes ENTP, they will entertain it over time, and I mean life time, 40+ they will start to change, if they allow it.

That is what the last two function, the unconscious functions mean, they are the shadow. example, Ni lacks, angry/depressed -> Se. not making use of Te, in the presence of a Fi-dom person, leads to -> Fi, and then it becomes Se Fi, aka terrible ESFP version (infantile).

So only your first two functions is your type. And we dislike others, what we don't like about ourselves. In the INTJ's case the ESFP, and the ESFP don't like the INTJ. But secretly we want to be them. So we might be critical towards them, but deep down inside that is what we wish we could be too.

 

[Zarathustra]

Have dated two ENTJ womyn

Highly recommend

Good physical chemistry, as both value Se

But not so much that they only have the attention span of a gnat

My greater ability with Fi allows me to actually help them develop theirs

Which is an unusual, interesting, and probably a quite new experience for an INTJ

They balance us by getting us to act; we balance them by getting them to consider

There will be some sort of inferior Fi fireworks, but they can be ridden through

While they may blow up, in the end, they tend to be more rational than FPs

They can be talked down from the ledge more easily, more consistently

And you can depend on them more precisely because of this quality

You will enjoy the same NiTe/TeNi way of thinking about things

Which means you have a partner for world domination

Badass power couples could come of this pairing

I am actually a fan of dating within quadra

Not exclusively, but I think these relationships make sense

And I think your mirror type is the easiest of the four to get along with

Based on considerable experience, I would highly recommend this pairing

 

[INTJMom]

...
That's my 3 year personal report. I thought I share it here, so that it can dispel all magical INTJ myths and nonsense that people have seemed to created for INTJs to live up to. I was so frustrated that nobody seems to understand me and why I don't understand them. This report comes from, "Personality Types" by GC Jung and the e-book "16 Personality Types" by Dr A.J. Drenth. Perhaps that can help your search.
...

If you would like a kinder gentler description of the types, esp. INTJ, you should own "Do What You Are" by the Barron-Tiegers.
In their book, they explain the strengths and weaknesses of ALL the types.

 

[Virtual ghost]

No. Way. They don't intimidate me, no matter their enneagram but I would be devising ways to kill them in their sleep and they would be looking for ways to kill me and make it look like an accident.

Sounds romantic.