[ENTP] Types of Immediate Family Members?

[BatmanFanatic]

As an ENTP, we're often prone to scrutiny from others, whether it's due to our seemingly nonsensical pop-culture references, horrific attention to details, procrastination or overall talkativeness. In my family though, the ENTP dislike seems to be extreme. I'm pondering if my family members are certain types that do not get along with ENTPs very well. Can you guys try to guess their types based on the information I give you?

My father:

Me and him have a rocky relationship. Here are some of his behaviors and how they interact with mine:

* He's very neat, organized and on top of work. I'm very sloppy, disorganized and wait until the last minute to do work. He frequently calls me out on this, calling me "lazy", "unmotivated", a "slacker".
* He's very concrete oriented in how he speaks. Whenever I make analogies to emphasize a point, he says: "Speak normally!" very obnoxiously
* He's hypocritical with manners. Whenever I interrupt someone, it's the end of the world. Whenever he interrupts someone when they're trying to speak and I call him out on it, he resorts to the most pathetic cliche known to man: "I'm the parent!"
* He's very uncompromising, even when the matter is something relatively mild. I try to compromise with people to evade conflict and he calls me a "pussy", "wimp" or "idiot".
* He's excessively politically correct, getting mad at me when I make blunt statements like: "That kid is retarded" or "Since he's retarded, it's unlikely that he'd be able to accomplish much".
* He freaks out if I get an A- as opposed to a solid A, whereas my attitude is: "It's not perfect, but it's still pretty good".

My mother:

Me and her have a much better relationship:

* She has trouble staying organized and tends to get distracted easily, often forgetting to do important tasks around the house. I also have this tendency and she doesn't call me out as much as my father would.
* She frequently does funny voices or sings randomly for the hell of it. I sometimes do similar things.
* She likes analogies and uses them frequently when making points. I also make analogies, so we see eye to eye there.
* She's more in tune to people's feelings, so she doesn't make brutally honest statements as much as I do.
* However, she can be impulsive and lashes out at others without thinking sometimes.

My sister:

Our relationship is VERY rocky:

* She's extremely organized and constantly forces me to be organized. She'll re-arrange objects in my room, try to tell me when to do assignments, etc.
* She takes her role as the older sibling seriously. Whenever I question her logic, she'll resort to: "Because I'm the boss!"
* She isn't very good with analogies.
* She'll check up on me frequently, asking how I am and saying: "There's my baby brother!"
* She sometimes likes my new ideas, but often finds them dumb.
* She's VERY domineering with her views. I tried to respectfully explain to her why I'm supporting Gary Johnson over Hillary Clinton in the election and she shut me down, saying: "Hillary is the best!"
* She ignores logic when the logic attacks her beliefs. For example, I told her: "You realize that Bill Clinton likely raped a woman. Why aren't you mad at him as well as Trump?" And she said: "I don't believe that, there's no proof!", even though there was no proof for what Trump said either.

 

[Yama]

I get along great with my dad. He's an ESTJ (I flip between that and ISTJ for him). We mostly have conflicts where Te/Fe is concerned but we mesh really well pretty much everywhere else which is why I chose to move in with him when my parents got divorced (on good terms and lived close so we just went wherever we wanted whenever).

My mom is en ENFP and honestly she's more of a friend than a mom. She's told me that she sees me as less of her kid and more of an adult friend. She's not an example of all ENFPs by any means, but she's really spacey and irresponsible and doesn't provide the stability or certainty that I need that my ESTJ dad does which is why I prefer living with him while I'm going to college instead of with my mom.

My little sister is INTP and we're completely hot and cold. I think she's awesome... when we DON'T live together. I can't STAND living in the same house as her. She's similar to my mom in all the NP ways that just totally conflict with me and my dad's SJ-ness. But we get along so great as friends when we don't have to share a living space.

I'll take a look at your family's types and be back in a bit.

 

[Yama]

It's hard to type with such limited information, especially since the information we list about others is always biased. However, here are my best guesses: SJ dad, NFP mom, sister also an SJ? It'd probably be better to provide more information and try to be as unbiased as possible.

 

[BatmanFanatic]

Okay, I'll do my best.


FATHER:
* He's very neat, meticulous and notices irritating details on clothing, on papers, etc.
* Whenever people ask him his reasoning, he irritatingly replies: "Because I said so!"
* He believes in getting up the same time each day, doing the same leisure activities each day and generally keeping to a routine.
* He almost never thinks in the future, constantly telling me: "Focus on the present!"
* He abuses his authority quite often, even when he's proven to be incompetent on a matter.
* He's terrible with his hands.
* He's also bad at abstract thinking.
* He doesn't understand figurative language well.
* Good at managing money.
* Doesn't get pop-culture connections, seeing them as "stupid".
* Can be bitter and hold onto the past.

MOTHER:
* Tries to be neat, but is disorganized, constantly struggles to "find the time to clean", forgets to do important routine tasks.
* Whenever people ask for her reasoning, she gives an actual explanation.
* Dislikes getting up early and enjoys varying up her routine.
* Sometimes thinks in the future, but tries to stay grounded to the present.
* Doesn't abuse her authority and admits her weaknesses more freely.
* Better with her hands. She can build moderately difficult objects
* Is good at abstract thinking, but especially loves using analogies and figurative language.
* Is mediocre at managing money
* Sometimes makes pop-cultural references to make a point.
* Prefers that people get along, rather then bluntly asserting her views
* Tries to let go of the past, believing it's unhealthy to hinge on it.

SISTER:
* Very neat and organized. Tends to notice small details.
* Very outgoing and talkative. Always needs to have plans.
* Prefers getting up early.
* Sometimes worries about the future, as well as sometimes thinks of creative ideas, but she prefers to stick to the routine present.
* Abuses her authority as an older sibling
* Not good with her hands
* Not good at abstract reasoning
* Not very good at analogies
* Good at managing money.
* Sometimes gets pop-culture refs.
* Often holds onto the past

 

[Abendrot]

My guesses so far for your family:

Father: ESTJ
Mother: XNTP
Sister: ESTJ

 

[Mayflower]

My guesses so far for your family:

Father: ESTJ
Mother: XNTP
Sister: ESTJ

I largely agree, but would say the father is more istj but an 8.
Mother: I get an xxfj vibe. Infj 9w1?
Sister: Estj 1?

This is just a dry guess. Can't do much without having "their" perspective.

 

[BatmanFanatic]

I was just curious, since as an ENTP, I especially don't get along well with my father and sister and wondered if that had anything to do with it.

 

[Mayflower]

I was just curious, since as an ENTP, I especially don't get along well with my father and sister and wondered if that had anything to do with it.

I would say no and yes. MBTI just kinda showcases (in general) what aspects of life you focus on. Ie. Me (xsfp, I think) and my mother (Istj,I think). I just do my own thing, while my mother just harps on me regarding goals and tidiness. Yes, there is tension sometimes, but we get along. Mbti gives one an idea of what one focuses on but doesn't really cover their "personality". Isfj+Isfj= theoretically good relationship. Reality: Jerk Isfj+Timid Isfj=parasitic relationship.

 

[Abendrot]

I largely agree, but would say the father is more istj but an 8.
Mother: I get an xxfj vibe. Infj 9w1?
Sister: Estj 1?

This is just a dry guess. Can't do much without having "their" perspective.

After reading the second post by [MENTION=30029]BatmanFanatic[/MENTION], I'd agree that the father is closer to ISTJ.
The sister seems to fit ESTJ pretty well.
As for the mother, I'm gonna stick with xNTP. I see an N-preference, but it's more present focused (Ne). Likely a Ti-Fe axis user. INFJ sounds unlikely, as INJs tend to be more organized and forward planning, and tend to be averse to changing their plans.

Here's some food for thought:According to Keirsey, the worst match for ENTP is ISTJ, while the best is INFJ.

 

[Yama]

Well, based on stereotypes, I'd say:

Dad: ISTJ
Mom: NFP
Sister: SfJ

Keep in mind that this probably won't be so accurate since these descriptions you give of them are flavored by your own personal experience and perceptions of them whilst MBTI is meant to be more of a self-typing system; the information you choose to give is also geared towards the system (saying someone isn't an abstract thinker is setting them up to look stereotypically S, for example) instead of just listing out natural behaviors without trying to make them somehow "fit" with the system one way or the other.

The most accurate I could get based on this is SJ for dad and sister and NP for mom. I/E is least important dichotomy tbh; J/P doesn't work very well as an independent dichotomy. Dad and sister could also be 6s. Mom sounds pretty Ne-Si. It might be beneficial to also take a look at motivations as well as behavior (like why someone chooses to stick or not stick to a routine).

 

[Jayce]

Oh My God! This is so close to my family. I never jived with my father. Think he is ISTJ/P, with learned E-ness. We have different problems (not so much authority but the things that need to be done the way HE wants them to be done, so, authority still) but the dynamic is there. Just no common ground on anything. He is very meticulous, wants every sensory thing to be just perfect while I couldn't care less. He is also so very dogmatic which I absolutely can't stand. Once he's set on something, there's no changing his mind. We can't talk much about anything meaningful because he just doesn't seem to "get" what I'm talking about and tops everything with "this is the truth" (religion etc.). Basically can't accumulate new information. Like banging your head against the wall. And he's always going on about some extremely detailed stuff which I can't focus on. We're basically yin and yang. I get along with him and our relationship is good and fun but just nothing in common. I get along better with my mother, even if that's sometimes hard too. She is hard to type but some not so healthy ENFP or XXFP thing is going on there. I don't have any siblings so can't go there.

I have no idea how I came out as an ENTP (as a child I was more pure ENTP) but it was pretty hard and constant not-being-understood in the family for me. I felt left out to tell the truth. My parents are so different from me I sometimes find it hard to believe I'm related.

 

[BatmanFanatic]

Oh My God! This is so close to my family. I never got along with my father. Think he is ISTJ, with learned E traits. We have different problems (not so much authority but the things that need to be done the way HE wants them to be done, so, authority still) but the dynamic is there. Just no common ground on anything. He is very meticulous, wants every sensory thing to be just perfect while I couldn't care less. He is also so very dogmatic which I absolutely can't stand. Once he's set on something, there's no changing his mind. We can't talk much about anything meaningful because he just doesn't seem to "get" what I'm talking about. And he's always going on about some extremely detailed stuff which I can't process so well. We're basically yin and yang. Get much better along with my mother, even if that's hard too. She is hard to type but some not so healthy ENFP or XXFP thing is going on there. That would explain the attraction between them. I don't have any siblings so can't go there.

I have no idea how I came out as an ENTP (as a child I was more pure ENTP) but it was pretty hard and constant not-being-understood in the family for me. I felt left out to tell the truth. My parents are so different from me I sometimes find it hard to believe I'm related.

Yeah, it can be challenging living with people who have types significantly different from yours. My father always claimed my ideas were nonsense, so I was raised to believe that my abstract reasoning held no purpose in life. My mother fostered it more however, so my perspective wasn't completely skewed. I wonder if the Enneagram types also have something to do with it. I believe I'm a 7w6, which is the "Neurotic Thrill Seeker", I believe. Which enneagram is opposed to 7s and 6s?

 

[entropie]

Father: ISTP
Mother: ISFJ
Sister: dont know yet, she is ten years younger and we do not have any kind of relationship. My bet is istp

 

[Jayce]

Yeah, it can be challenging living with people who have types significantly different from yours. My father always claimed my ideas were nonsense, so I was raised to believe that my abstract reasoning held no purpose in life. My mother fostered it more however, so my perspective wasn't completely skewed. I wonder if the Enneagram types also have something to do with it. I believe I'm a 7w6, which is the "Neurotic Thrill Seeker", I believe. Which enneagram is opposed to 7s and 6s?

It is, damn it is. We never talked all that much really. My parents never supported me in anything I wanted to do, always implying I should do this and that. I never did and I had to find my own way in life by myself... I grew up with only sensors in my entire life until university (not sure about my mother but she is mostly spiritual, not much abstract thinking) and damn its hard. Somehow I was able to keep my way of thinking through all of it.

I'm also deep down a 7(w6) (Also some 4, 2, 9 traits, in that orderI also share the knowledge seeker role with a 5). but I've no idea if there even are enneagrams opposed to anything. If there is its probably along the lines of 1, 4, 5, 6, 8. And I've no idea what my parents are, I havent' looked into enneagram all that much.

 

[entp@ladynfreak]

your dad sounds a lot like mine like a lot and hes an enfj your sister is estj your mom sounds like a perceiver lucky you shes perhaps enfp
I don't know your age so if lets assume your dad is an enfj which I do think he is; because estj don't call out on people who acc to them are being disingenuous which we(ENTP) appear a lot they just slightly advice you in a stern voice and show their displeasure with face or more like passively but the

ENFJ'S they are loud mouth's in this department they'll keep pestering you and pointing until you buck up and do it they'll sofetly tell you or might even through a tantrum if don't do their bidding

BUT if he is enfj you can improve your relationship by convincing him about why or why not you would do a certain stuff enfj's can be convinced by words estj well they are hard asses

 

[entp@ladynfreak]

god how do you survive with so many sensors such pain in the ass there nagging can be productive but its annoying most of the time ; my parents are ;dad ENFJ and mom ENTJ I AM AN ENTP me and my mum clash a lot but we come to terms because she understands that what I m doing is for my best but my infp brother poor thang he gets misunderstood a lot and can't get his view or decision across parents properly and becomes stubborn but we get along really well but I might be too much for him sometime

 

[neuskens]

Can you tell stories of you interacting? Based on what you wrote, it may seem obvious that your dad and sister are SJs, but I'm guessing there is more depth to them that could give more light to their cognitive functions. Overall, I'm putting type aside and categorizing your dad as someone unawarely resented because did not know love as a kid, repeating relationship patterns he once despised but grew to think were the only ones that somehow worked.

 

[BatmanFanatic]

Can you tell stories of you interacting? Based on what you wrote, it may seem obvious that your dad and sister are SJs, but I'm guessing there is more depth to them that could give more light to their cognitive functions. Overall, I'm putting type aside and categorizing your dad as someone unawarely resented because did not know love as a kid, repeating relationship patterns he once despised but grew to think were the only ones that somehow worked.

I could try to give some examples of interactions between me and them.

Scenario #1. Not telling him information that wasn't his business

Dad: Why didn't you tell me you weren't doing well in this class?

Me: Well, I knew that I could improve my grade by the end of the semester and that if you guys weren't of any use to helping me improve my grade, I'd only be upsetting you by telling you information that isn't relevant in the long run. Think of it like this. If you're producing a movie that ends up being wonderful, you don't tell your audience about the troubled production, as long as it turns out fine.

Dad: STOP USING ANALOGIES! SPEAK ENGLISH! SAY WHAT YOU MEAN! YOUR ANALOGIES ARE SO STUPID! GAH!

Scenario #2. Staying up late

Dad: Why are you staying up late?! You should be going to bed at a certain time!

Me: It depends on when I have to get up in the morning. If I don't have to get up at a certain time, then I don't see the need in getting up early, just because other people do. What's your reasoning?

Dad: Because I said so!

Me: How many times do I have to tell you that "because I said so" isn't a valid reason for anything?! Thank God you're not a businessman, otherwise you'd bankrupt the company when you told them that you invested in a crappily made machine with horrible marketing "because you said so". Nintendo would love you, that's for sure.

 

[entropie]

^ you are doing it wrong. You have to show him respect first and then you can control him. the lower minds shall always be your sock puppets

 

[Yama]

Yes yes, we get it; you and your dad have conflicting personalities, you're opposites, you don't get along, etc. However unless we get a more objective, non-biased example of both the positive and negative aspects of him and good as well as bad interactions, you're not going to get a very accurate typing of him, as it'll be based purely in your own mental image and biases. I'm sure there's more complexity to him than simply making your life hell all the time. I'm not trying to invalidate your experiences or anything here at all; however I am saying that you're letting your personal experiences and problems with your family members get in the way of your typings of them (and your explanations and examples of their behavior). Surely there must be more examples of what your dad is like beyond just telling you to do things and you disagreeing? What are they like in the day to day? What are both things you love and things you hate about them? What are the kinds of things that are important to them? What are their dreams and ambitions? Don't think about it from an "I'm an NP and they're clearly SJs so I'd say they are..." perspective, but just from a purely observational perspective. My apologies if any of this comes off as harsh, I'm not trying to be.