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[INTP] Commitment and decisions

laurapants08

New member
Joined
Apr 3, 2015
Messages
83
MBTI Type
INTP
Enneagram
4
Do INTPs have difficulties with making decisions, especially decisions that have to do with commitment for long durations of time?
 

Totenkindly

@.~*virinaĉo*~.@
Joined
Apr 19, 2007
Messages
50,192
MBTI Type
BELF
Enneagram
594
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
I do. It's always been that way. I don't like committing to something long-term even if I enjoy it, but typically you end up needing to if you want to get anywhere in life, unfortunately. So I try to just bite my lip and do it for stuff that seems sensible.

I just feel very hemmed in, and take responsibilities seriously, so I tend to not make a lot of long-term promises since I usually feel like I have to stick with it once I commit. I also like remaining open-ended and flexible, which committments reduce.
 

laurapants08

New member
Joined
Apr 3, 2015
Messages
83
MBTI Type
INTP
Enneagram
4
I play the "what if" game to often in my decision making process. I know I have to be reasonable and responsible but I seem to be on this path where I rather stay stationary and limit myself to any decisions in possible yet i recognize its a complete delusion of its on kind.

Recently I've found myself completely stressed out because I some how managed to go several months without making any major decisions in which I should be. Example: entering a relationship, finding a new job, attempting new relationships (friendships, family members, coworkers) ending relationships of kinds in parentheses.

Ect.

Most my life I've always allowed people to make decisions for me. Now I'm on my own completely independent and kind of like what the hell. Part of me would love to continue forth to see if its possible to do through life this way. Write a memoir about it . Or would I find more fullfilment taking more action.

The commitment though! Ugh. Following through with mundane task makes me bonkers!!!
 

Luke O

Super Ape
Joined
Mar 25, 2015
Messages
1,729
MBTI Type
INTP
Enneagram
954
Do INTPs have difficulties with making decisions, especially decisions that have to do with commitment for long durations of time?

I didn't sleep the night before I got married, if that counts.
 

unwittywisdombreath

New member
Joined
May 1, 2015
Messages
6
MBTI Type
INFJ
Enneagram
5w6
There's this INTP guy who've I've been interested in and we've been great friends since we've met. I remember the first time dating/love/relationships was brought up and he said that he wasn't allowed to date. I noticed that he doesn't like being tied down to just one conversation online and he talks to other people simultaneously other than me. I've been told that we suit each other and that he has romantic interest in me but I can tell that he isn't ready to commit to having a serious love life. INTP's don't like being tied down and want to have the freedom to roam. The problem is that they don't realise that they will get that freedom depending on which type they date. I feel like we're compatible as partners and we have insightful conversations. That's an INTP in my experience as an INFJ anyways...
 

Luke O

Super Ape
Joined
Mar 25, 2015
Messages
1,729
MBTI Type
INTP
Enneagram
954
There's this INTP guy who've I've been interested in and we've been great friends since we've met. I remember the first time dating/love/relationships was brought up and he said that he wasn't allowed to date. I noticed that he doesn't like being tied down to just one conversation online and he talks to other people simultaneously other than me. I've been told that we suit each other and that he has romantic interest in me but I can tell that he isn't ready to commit to having a serious love life. INTP's don't like being tied down and want to have the freedom to roam. The problem is that they don't realise that they will get that freedom depending on which type they date. I feel like we're compatible as partners and we have insightful conversations. That's an INTP in my experience as an INFJ anyways...

What makes you and he a great match?
 

unwittywisdombreath

New member
Joined
May 1, 2015
Messages
6
MBTI Type
INFJ
Enneagram
5w6
What makes you and he a great match?

We have similar interests and can debate and converse continually, thus creating wonderful connection. We've shared great ideas and memories which he mutually enjoys and we share enlightening topics. Not all INTP's may get along with INFJ's but this one and I really do have a good relationship with each other. I'm sorry if the tied down comment doesn't apply to all INTP but it does seem like a recurring trait with those typed.
 

INTPhonetics

New member
Joined
May 23, 2015
Messages
10
MBTI Type
INTP
We have similar interests and can debate and converse continually, thus creating wonderful connection. We've shared great ideas and memories which he mutually enjoys and we share enlightening topics. Not all INTP's may get along with INFJ's but this one and I really do have a good relationship with each other. I'm sorry if the tied down comment doesn't apply to all INTP but it does seem like a recurring trait with those typed.

I'm an INTP female. In my experience(s), I've only been able to commit to a relationship (platonic or romantic) if I can not only share similar interests to discuss/read/watch/listen to/what have you with said person, but also overcome disagreements - those beyond the day-to-day debates we INTPs know and love, lol. If a relationship of any sort survives arguments and helps further growth in both individuals, it's definitely a positive sign. Of course, I'm sure many would agree. I need someone that will push me to commit, push me to not only express my ideas, but act on them, too, and so on...
Which may result in conflict, but overall, I'll be beyond grateful...and hopefully, said person will be thankful for my offbeat ramblings and tendency to be brutally honest in any emotionally-driven situation (not fun for those who derive comfort from sympathy)...heh.

I am, however, only writing from my experience. Take it how you will.

P.S...INTPs and INFJs are often dubbed the "Golden Pair." They balance each other out pretty well, actually.
 

Chrysanthea

New member
Joined
May 22, 2015
Messages
361
Hm... Nowadays that is unfortunately true for me. It seems I had much more drive and willpower to follow through on commitments involving the bettering of myself back when I had delved into the philosophy of Buddhism, but I've since lost quite a bit of that. Dx I always say to myself I am going to eat healthy, exercise frequently, and other various activities through which I can become a better overall human being... but I either become distracted by other things or just lack the motivation to go through with it. If by long term commitment, you mean relationships, then I have nothing to say because I haven't been in a relationship long enough (a result of boredom) to have any sort of valid opini- welp... I have unknowingly just confirmed your statement about INTP's. Nothing more needs to be said!~
 

INTP

Active member
Joined
Jul 31, 2009
Messages
7,803
MBTI Type
intp
Enneagram
5w4
Instinctual Variant
sx
There was this commercial on tv where some guy was being really ISTJ obsessive about everything. At one point the guy was obsessing about tomatoes, which ones are the best to buy and the commentator said something about picking up the tomatoes like he will spend the rest of his life with it. I kinda saw myself on that :D . Now if i act towards a small thing like tomato in that sort of manner(not that overly tho, and selective about stuff i act towards like that), bigger commitment naturally requires more careful observation and pondering on, especially if its something important..
 

Obsidius

Chumped.
Joined
Jan 2, 2015
Messages
318
MBTI Type
INTP
Enneagram
5w6
Instinctual Variant
so/sx
I think INTPs in general tend to think of the possibilities of any given scenario, and in effect struggle to make convictions. Most of the INTPs I know tend to struggle with future decisions and definitely with commitment, though I can't understand the aforementioned struggle with commitment to love life or friends, I think that's something irrelevant to MBTI.
 
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