[INTJ] Why are INTJs so enigmatic?

[Opal]

Why would put yourself through the torture of peering through ANYONE'S mind when talking to them? No matter how hard you try to put yourself in someone elses shoes, the shoe is still not going to fit perfectly. Why bother? More hassle then worth.

Not that we can succeed, but some people fascinate and inspire me.

 

[Jet Stream]

I think that mainly applies to fictionalized INTJs, nonchalant. Most others are just bored bookworms wanting to establish a "badass" identity for themselves.

 

[windoverlake]

For me, enigmatic means something specific. Resorting to being enigmatic has always been a very rare frontline response to intrusiveness and/or a blatant disregard for my boundaries. It's for when I've tried both subtle and direct methods of communicating my discomfort but the interlocuter remains steadfast and pushy; it's proprietary for a rare type schmuck. Then it's, behold, the enigmatic troll.

 

[Coriolis]

What type of INTJ's are you communicating with? INTJ's are easy to understand. They are just so blunt, it goes over most people heads. Since society has taught most to "Read between the lines."

Dont trust INTj's body language
Ignore their tone of voice
just take their words literally. It's seriously not that hard.

INTJ's arent the type to bullshit. Straight to the point. You can easily see it through conversation. It's not like they say ONE thing but they mean something completely different and expect you to understand what they are trying to get through with body language, tone, and stupid difficult rules society builds with ways to converse with people.

I agree with both quotes above, and likewise cannot understand what is so difficult about this. People who insist on looking for nonexistent content "between the lines" drive me absolutely round the bend. I choose my words with great care, and to disregard them in favor of ambiguous other "cues" is not only counterproductive but bordering on insulting.

For me, enigmatic means something specific. Resorting to being enigmatic has always been a very rare frontline response to intrusiveness and/or a blatant disregard for my boundaries. It's for when I've tried both subtle and direct methods of communicating my discomfort but the interlocuter remains steadfast and pushy; it's proprietary for a rare type schmuck. Then it's, behold, the enigmatic troll.

Well, this applies to being intentionally enigmatic. Yes, I have been known to do this as well, but I suspect we are also unintentionally enigmatic, at least sometimes and to some folks.

 

[windoverlake]

Well, this applies to being intentionally enigmatic. Yes, I have been known to do this as well, but I suspect we are also unintentionally enigmatic, at least sometimes and to some folks.

I suppose, and you're probably right. But I'm also of the thinking that going out of one's way to put someone else's comfort above one's own, at one's own expense, is misguided. If someone genuinely respects and wishes to communicate with you, they will ask for clarification on something that might seem enigmatic or confusing at the outset. Also, I'm constantly asking people to clarify something they've said, and they're certainly not all Ni-doms. Besides, most conversation is cross-calibration of individual systems and languages.

But truly enigmatic communication that isn't put-on as such is rare, ime; I can't think of anyone I know who is enigmatic in that sense. I wish I could read/hear/see a real example of what is considered unintentionally enigmatic. The few times I've been truly baffled by someone was when there was a language/lost-in-translation issue at hand.

 

[Coriolis]

But truly enigmatic communication that isn't put-on as such is rare, ime; I can't think of anyone I know who is enigmatic in that sense. I wish I could read/hear/see a real example of what is considered unintentionally enigmatic. The few times I've been truly baffled by someone was when there was a language/lost-in-translation issue at hand.

A very straightforward example: I am webmaster for a local community group. When I have occasion to explain some upcoming changes, or how some problem was resolved, it sometimes goes over the heads of many of the other attendees. Sometimes they think they understand, but I can tell from their questions and comments that they don't. Here the culprit is simply inexperience with the internet (group is mostly older folks), and the solution is simply to explain in more basic language.

 

[Hawthorne]

Most INTJs I've met were pretty straightforward. It's also pretty easy to ask them "sooo what do you think about x" and trust you'll get an honest response.

The only thing I've had trouble reading is their unique brand of deadpan sarcasm. No inflection at all.

 

[prplchknz]

maybe the fact that intjs are one of the more likely types to not bullshit around in social situations, and most other people do that. when an INTJ is direct the other person is like wow...such...wisdom...what does it mean? and search for hidden meanings? when their is none and then they decide the INTJ is enigmatic?

 

[windoverlake]

A very straightforward example: I am webmaster for a local community group. When I have occasion to explain some upcoming changes, or how some problem was resolved, it sometimes goes over the heads of many of the other attendees. Sometimes they think they understand, but I can tell from their questions and comments that they don't. Here the culprit is simply inexperience with the internet (group is mostly older folks), and the solution is simply to explain in more basic language.

I guess I'm extremely strict with my definition of enigmatic, because your example of using more basic language seems more an issue of complexity of form rather than presenting an idea/thought that's difficult to understand or penetrate. I would say that your de-complexifying an explanation is the same as cross-calibration of language, and nothing to do with the actual nucleus of the idea/explanation itself. But yes, I do understand what you mean and I appreciate the example.

maybe the fact that intjs are one of the more likely types to not bullshit around in social situations, and most other people do that. when an INTJ is direct the other person is like wow...such...wisdom...what does it mean? and search for hidden meanings? when their is none and then they decide the INTJ is enigmatic?

I think there's something to this, and particularly the underlined.

 

[chubber]

They would probably stand next to an INTJ in a shop and think that person is a moron because of their clothing style.

Or the words that they use.

 

[BadOctopus]

They would probably stand next to an INTJ in a shop and think that person is a moron because of his clothing style.

Watch your mouth, son. I'm fabulous.

 

[chubber]

Watch your mouth, son. I'm fabulous.

Says the dodo jumping out of the window.

 

[Coriolis]

They would probably stand next to an INTJ in a shop and think that person is a moron because of their clothing style.

Or the words that they use.

Unless the person is dressed like some stereotypical nerd/geek. Not exactly a fashion statement, but associated, however wrongly, with being intelligent.

I sometimes find myself asking questions in shops that catch the clerks flat-footed, and probably mystify any other customers in earshot. The questions are quite understandable, I think it just doesn't occur to most people to take an interest in the answers.

 

[Derpravity]

I know I'm not enigmatic as some kind of statement or anything. I'm reticent in person because I don't talk when I don't have anything to communicate to someone. I don't ask questions unless I have something I want to know. I only enjoy talking for the sake of talking with my closest friends, people whose company I like the most, and even then only when there's something interesting to talk about. If I don't talk to you it's not because I dislike you, I'm just indifferent. I'm the kind of person who requires a reason to do something, rather than a reason not to do something. "Why," not "why not."

That's my reasoning for being private, and antisocial in general. Do other INTJs feel differently?

 

[Virtual ghost]

I thought that they were just poor at communication with others and that they dont practice structured internal communication/dialogue much either, but some Ni extra jumbo mumbo jumbo and Fi shit. But seriously, who knows whats going on in INTJs head? And i think its best if we never knew, because truth isnt easy to handle most the times.

I will give you short hint ....

 

[andresimon]

I will give you short hint ....

Palpatine or aka a DARK PALPATINE is an Infj. So epic fail INTJ.

 

[Virtual ghost]

Palpatine or aka a DARK PALPATINE is an Infj. So epic fail INTJ.

And they say that INTJs do not have a sense of humor.

 

[andresimon]

And they say that INTJs do not have a sense of humor.

Deep down inside INTJ's want to be ENFP's.

 

[Virtual ghost]

Deep down inside INTJ's want to be ENFP's.

If you are trying to crack me for some reason this is not going to work. Especially since I have no desire at all to be a FP type.

 

[andresimon]

If you are trying to crack me for some reason this is not going to work. Especially since I have no desire at all to be a FP type.

ENFP is your paradoxitype. It's also where you are weakest and your biggest fear. Because you focus on what you focus on, the natural biases that occur make you very WEAK in certain areas. For INTJ's specifically you are a terrible judge of character and are really bad at understanding people in general.

Because this is the source of your greatest weakness it is also where you get the most sanctification if and when you do overcome it. Hence you can't help but want to be an ENFP. It is the natural result of your specific cognitive biases .

Oh and for me, deep down inside I want to be an INTJ .

GG NO RE