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[NT] really mean things you've said that you sort of regret a little maybe

Kora

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Uh, the last one happened with my mother, who is a ESFJ. Her brother is 60 years old, has been seeing another woman spending her wife's money, has threaten her daughters with a knife... and so on. But now he says 'oh nobody loves me and I'll kill myself'. Then my mother was crying in the kitchen about that, and when she told me the news, I just said 'Well, it would be better if he really kills himself, we all could get some rest then'. And she stopped crying, looked me jaw-dropped and yelled 'He's my brother, don't you dare to say that!'. She was angry at me for the rest of the day :\

Or that time with a very religious history teacher, who was telling us that in the middle ages nobody could explain anything via science because it would be against what 'god' says. And then I chuckled and said (too loud) 'well, if you can't understand science, you can always try with faith'. She looked at me, and I'm not sure if she caught my drift... at least my ENTP classmate aided me saying 'I think she's talking about how they felt in that age'.
I don't know if she got really angry at me, but I think she treated me with some coldness for the rest of the year.
 

murkrow

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Uh, the last one happened with my mother, who is a ESFJ. Her brother is 60 years old, has been seeing another woman spending her wife's money, has threaten her daughters with a knife... and so on. But now he says 'oh nobody loves me and I'll kill myself'. Then my mother was crying in the kitchen about that, and when she told me the news, I just said 'Well, it would be better if he really kills himself, we all could get some rest then'. And she stopped crying, looked me jaw-dropped and yelled 'He's my brother, don't you dare to say that!'. She was angry at me for the rest of the day :\

Do you mean that?
 

Kora

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Do you mean that?

Actually... yes. I think he's causing too much trouble, but not because he's insane or he doesn't know what he's doing. He's totally aware of what he does (I mean, he's using his wife's money for buying gifts to another woman), and he doesn't want to mend his mistakes. I don't want him to die, of course, but if he even says that he wants to die... well, better, he can do that. Less trouble. Anyway, he won't do it. He's just trying to make them feel bad for blaming him for what he did.
 

runvardh

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Actually... yes. I think he's causing too much trouble, but not because he's insane or he doesn't know what he's doing. He's totally aware of what he does (I mean, he's using his wife's money for buying gifts to another woman), and he doesn't want to mend his mistakes. I don't want him to die, of course, but if he even says that he wants to die... well, better, he can do that. Less trouble. Anyway, he won't do it. He's just trying to make them feel bad for blaming him for what he did.

I hope you don't feel too bad; as en NF I even say he's out of line and the only thing the family should kick themselves about is letting him get away with the BS. But that's enough Te from me ^_^
 

LadyJaye

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Being offensive and being dishonest and sneaky is not the same thing.

So if you're not sorry for being offensive, why do you have regrets about the way you spoke to the woman in your first post? You should only be sorry for being sneaky and dishonest? Your explanations are vague.
 

Kora

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I hope you don't feel too bad; as en NF I even say he's out of line and the only thing the family should kick themselves about is letting him get away with the BS. But that's enough Te from me ^_^

I see, somehow that makes me feel better. I know that with F people I should be less blunt... but sometimes I just forget.
 

murkrow

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So if you're not sorry for being offensive, why do you have regrets about the way you spoke to the woman in your first post? You should only be sorry for being sneaky and dishonest? Your explanations are vague.

Because my honesty was used as a tool for hurt and not as a tool for aid.

I obviously had no constructive reason for saying what I said, and I could have easily given her some input on her work.
 

runvardh

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I see, somehow that makes me feel better. I know that with F people I should be less blunt... but sometimes I just forget.

Eh, only enough to get through a few defenses; mince your words too much and your meaning vaporizes in the politiking. I like to be comforted and held when my emotions are raging, other times I just need a walk then a hug. After that, there usually is still a problem to be solved and I'd like to think I'm not too weak to take suggestion on how to solve it.
 

MacGuffin

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I think this is the second time in a week I've quoted this phrase:

"Honesty without compassion is brutality."
 

Virtual ghost

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I do not regret this one because I was provoked.
I was in car with my farher.



Father: You are big person now so you can go into school/ mall shooting now. Do you want me too buy you a rifle? (he makes fun of my lifestyle).

Me:School/ mall shooting? (I play dumb)

Father: You know, that is when some guy starts too shoot people in public place and then he kills himself.

Me: I would never do that!

Father: I am very glad to hear that.

Me: I am fine with that idea but I would never kill myself. I would turn myself in. In the end.

Father:YOU WOULD TURN YOURSELF IN !?

Me: Yes, so that I could have a trial and see the family members of people which I have killed.
In that case I could laugh at their face or play games with them by saying things like "Your daughter said that she loved you very much:hi:".
Oh man that would be the day! Buuuahhhaahhaa :devil:




My father did not said a word for the rest of the trip.
But the catch is that I have said the last part with so much passion and enthusiasm(and with a smile). So entire thing was really creepy.

My point: Do not ask a question if you can't live with an answer. ;)

But I admit that my jokes are too cynical-sarcastic and too brutal for many people. Since I am scientific and robotic loner 90% of the time this kind of things are always delivered as a suprise. What boosts the reaction even further.
 

Virtual ghost

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your lifestyle?

Yes.


For example playing violent video games for 18h a day.

I have been on only 6 partys in my life.
Spending entire summer not talking to anyone and .............


From the outside I match the stereotype of school shooter so much that it is impossible not to create a connection.
 

murkrow

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Don't school shooters usually have friends to plan the shooting with?
 

Virtual ghost

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Don't school shooters usually have friends to plan the shooting with?

Why would someone want to share all the fame with somebody else?

Plus if you have more people. There is a larger possibility that one member will change his mind and share the information with the police.


Why do I have a feeling that you never planned any school shootings?:devil:


Edit:The point of this post is to show why people could classify me as a school shooter.
 

Priam

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I have a similar story to Kora, though I don't really regret it. My grandmother has been emotionally... fragile (whiney?) since my grandfather left her in '89. Recently she's started on a new tactic of expressing this by proclaiming how she wished she was dead or how her plane should have crashed etc. etc. ad nauseum. After several months of trying to be sympathetic, I was wearing thin on how blatant her emotional exploitation was becoming. One day she starts on a repeating loop of "I just want to die" and I finally snap.

Cradling her gently in a hug, I used my softest, sweetest voice and said "if you want to die, just do it already. Otherwise stop saying it."

She stopped using that line around me. I have no regrets.
 

Ivy

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I made my mom cry again today. I'm really turning into the lousiest F ever.
 

murkrow

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Why would someone want to share all the fame with somebody else?

Plus if you have more people. There is a larger possibility that one member will change his mind and share the information with the police.


Why do I have a feeling that you never planned any school shootings?:devil:


Edit:The point of this post is to show why people could classify me as a school shooter.

columbine was a group I think?
 

Kora

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Me: Yes, so that I could have a trial and see the family members of people which I have killed.
In that case I could laugh at their face or play games with them by saying things like "Your daughter said that she loved you very much".
Oh man that would be the day! Buuuahhhaahhaa
... That made me laugh very loud.

I have a similar story to Kora, though I don't really regret it. My grandmother has been emotionally... fragile (whiney?) since my grandfather left her in '89. Recently she's started on a new tactic of expressing this by proclaiming how she wished she was dead or how her plane should have crashed etc. etc. ad nauseum. After several months of trying to be sympathetic, I was wearing thin on how blatant her emotional exploitation was becoming. One day she starts on a repeating loop of "I just want to die" and I finally snap.

Cradling her gently in a hug, I used my softest, sweetest voice and said "if you want to die, just do it already. Otherwise stop saying it."

She stopped using that line around me. I have no regrets.
I think you did right... When people says that they want to die it's like a great attention call, and they don't see that they may hurt others... or worse, they know it, and they use it. Some emo-teenager I once met was rambling about how much he wanted to die and how angry was because they parents had took his sleeping pills so he couldn't kill himself. I told him that he could try to throw himself under a car, but... surprsingly, he didn't. Anyway, I don't regret saying that.
 
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