[ENTP] How do I (an INFP) become an ENTP?

[Azure Flame]

I'm tired of being an INFP. All I ever do is feel, think and make myself promises to help me become a perfect person. I constantly break my promises. Everyday I wake up thinking, 'Today will be the day that I start life and become the ideal me.' I. Always. Fail. The fact that I can't change myself sickens me.

I'm irretrievably overwhelmed with emotions-the world is so beautiful and there's so much pain in it. I want every single human being to be happy, to be the best person they can be. It's too big though, I don't know how to help the world because it's too chaotic and I don't know everything, not even close. If I did know everything I wouldn't know how to organize that information, I don't even know how to organize my current thoughts. There are to many factors in life and to me, life is overwhelming, confusing, hard, chaotic, a puzzle, uncontrollable- it's too much and it's too hard.

I want to become an ENTP. I want to be like Barney Stinson, the Joker, Bugs Bunny, Tom Sawyer, Tyler Durdan, Jack Sparrow, Ferris Bueller, Tony Stark.. some are arguably not ENTP, but I hope you understand what I'm looking to become. I want to not be so emotional.. I want to be clever, tough, adventurous, brave, quick-witted, persuasive, and most of all, in control.

Like an INFP, ENTPs see the world as full of possibilities, the difference is that they know how to navigate it.

Please tell me specific steps I can take, actions I can do, thoughts I can think to become an ENTP. Thank you.

Congratulations' you're a thinker. You like to make statements about what makes sense. Sometimes things make so much sense to you that you have to correct other people who don't make sense. Then these people get upset and say hurtful things to you. Sometimes you go through the most prestigious college wondering, "wow, now that I achieved that, lets do something big with my life!" So now you're a biomechanical engineer who just invented the first robot with a human brain. You get the nobel peace prize because that's what ENTP's get when they invent stuff. You go your whole life accomplishing fantastic things because you have the mental organization to do so. You're at the top of a skyscraper getting your dick sucked and you invariably do not care about who these people are because women are a dime a dozen. You look out the window of the city wondering what it would be like if you were a feeler who had real friends that you openned up to and cared about in a deep personal manner. You wonder what it would be like if you lived that life. After reading all those books and gathering all that knowledge and knowing everything there is to know and inventing everything there is to invent you wonder "what is the purpose to life? why do I feel unsatisfied?" You wonder why people get upset when you correct them. Those who are jealous of your accomplishments seek to destroy you or thwart your efforts to success. You meet someone who is incredibly beautiful. This person is suave, creative, smart, funny, responsible etc. You talk to her, but you're too logical. Too blunt. Too unemotional to understand the subtle nuances in communication that make a conversation smooth. Suddenly you're made fun of because you're clumsy and socially awkward. You feel hurt and rejected but don't realize you feel this way until you've hurt someone else without realizing it. Sometimes you'll be sitting there deep in thought, and someone will ask you why you're sad. You'll reply, "I'm not sad, I'm just thinking." Phew, you managed to thwart one person. Now lets thwart another 30 per week until you eventually lose patience and think there is something wrong with you. Sometimes you see people being happy who have no money but plenty of friends and wonder, "gee, wouldn't it be nice to be that way?"

 

[Ene]

Abbey,

Sit down and make a list of 10 things that make you special and maybe, just maybe, you'll realize they're not worth trading off to become someone else.

Don't compare yourself to others. No matter what type you are or what type you compare yourself to, you'll always come up short. Just work to discover who you already are and then hone your assets and work on your libilities.

Every type's all right. Being an ENTP is not better than being an INFP. And ENTPs aren't any happier. They just have different problems.

INFPs are often a moral compass for the rest of the world and without a compass of some sort, people get lost. But on the flip side, it's not easy being a compass. People get mad at you when you don't point in the direction they want to go. I know we don't hear it a lot but I know from having several very close INFP friends that it takes a lot of courage to stand true to who and what you are. INFPs can be among the most courageous of all people, not a loud in your face domineering courage, but a quiet strength that endures like a distance runner. Sure, when they are very young, they have to learn to navigate the emotional waters but it can be done. You can work on developing your Ti and you can challenge yourself and put yourself out there a bit, but at the core, don't dislike who you are. Don't try to trade it away like it's somehow inferior, because it's not.

Feelings come. Feelings go. They are undependable. Learn to channel them. Hold onto the ones that bring you peace and let go of the ones that cause you pain. Don't despise the gifts you have been given.

ENTPs are okay, too, but knowing how to navigate the external world is in no way superior to knowing how to navigate the inner world.

I meet a lot of INFPs [maybe because I'm a writer/poet and they seem to float around in my circle of friends a great deal]...anyway, I meet a lot of INFPs who want to be somebody else and there's not one thing wrong with what they are except they look at others and compare themselves.

Besides, we often change as we grow older. Chances are that you haven't even fully come into you auxillary function yet, much less your secondary or tertiary ones...give it some time. Find all that is good about INFPs and strive to be that. Yeah, Tony Stark's okay but he's not better than A.A. Milne, Edgar Allan Poe, JK Rowling or William Blake...not better, just different. It takes all kinds. I mean, well for Pete's sake, where would the world be without Winnie the Pooh?

Okay. It's midnight. I've got to get up at 5:30. I hope you start the day realizing that you're already a pretty cool person with a big heart and willing mind. That's cool no matter what type you call yourself.

 

[ThatsWhatHeSaid]

I'm tired of being an INFP. All I ever do is feel, think and make myself promises to help me become a perfect person. I constantly break my promises. Everyday I wake up thinking, 'Today will be the day that I start life and become the ideal me.' I. Always. Fail. The fact that I can't change myself sickens me.

I'm irretrievably overwhelmed with emotions-the world is so beautiful and there's so much pain in it. I want every single human being to be happy, to be the best person they can be. It's too big though, I don't know how to help the world because it's too chaotic and I don't know everything, not even close. If I did know everything I wouldn't know how to organize that information, I don't even know how to organize my current thoughts. There are to many factors in life and to me, life is overwhelming, confusing, hard, chaotic, a puzzle, uncontrollable- it's too much and it's too hard.

I want to become an ENTP. I want to be like Barney Stinson, the Joker, Bugs Bunny, Tom Sawyer, Tyler Durdan, Jack Sparrow, Ferris Bueller, Tony Stark.. some are arguably not ENTP, but I hope you understand what I'm looking to become. I want to not be so emotional.. I want to be clever, tough, adventurous, brave, quick-witted, persuasive, and most of all, in control.

Like an INFP, ENTPs see the world as full of possibilities, the difference is that they know how to navigate it.

Please tell me specific steps I can take, actions I can do, thoughts I can think to become an ENTP. Thank you.

I identify with some of the things you said. I think what changes is expectations and realism. You can't fix everyone and you can't transform into your ideal self. In fact, transforming is probably what's keeping you from being closer to your ideal. By that I mean, the pressure you put on yourself to be someone else, and the implied self-rejection and self-hate that fuels that drive to transform.

Life is overwhelming and confusing no matter what type you are, unless you're an idiot. It's not really supposed to make sense. That's not what it's intended for. It's not intended for anything. That's not a bad thing; it's just a thing. Some people would even say it's a good thing, but I don't know. I don't think ENTPs are any better at sorting life, much less their own thoughts. It feels like a waterfall of thoughts that we're trying to capture in a small plastic water bottle. It moves quickly.

I don't think you should try to be an ENTP. I think you should stop thinking about type altogether and just decide what you can do in each moment to bring yourself a little peace of mind. Your life is a journey made up of little steps, not just huge leaps.

 

[Winds of Thor]

Step 1. Tell yourself you're Awesome. Believe it.
ENTPs think this (at the price of others thinking they're arrogant). It's because they're capable. Socially. With the world around them. In their immediate environment. Just very adaptable. It's not from intentionally being arrogant. Although having said that I can't speak for others.

 

[Stephano]

Originally Posted by Enneagram Institute
Fours typically have problems with a negative self-image and chronically low self-esteem. They attempt to compensate for this by cultivating a Fantasy Self—an idealized self-image which is built up primarily in their imaginations. A Four we know shared with us that he spent most of his spare time listening to classical music while fantasizing about being a great concert pianist—à la Vladimir Horowitz. Unfortunately, his commitment to practicing fell far short of his fantasized self-image, and he was often embarrassed when people asked him to play for them. His actual abilities, while not poor, became sources of shame.

I did that! Is it possible that 5s do that? (If they're INTP)

 

[yenom]

I'm tired of being an INFP. All I ever do is feel, think and make myself promises to help me become a perfect person. I constantly break my promises. Everyday I wake up thinking, 'Today will be the day that I start life and become the ideal me.' I. Always. Fail. The fact that I can't change myself sickens me.

I'm irretrievably overwhelmed with emotions-the world is so beautiful and there's so much pain in it. I want every single human being to be happy, to be the best person they can be. It's too big though, I don't know how to help the world because it's too chaotic and I don't know everything, not even close. If I did know everything I wouldn't know how to organize that information, I don't even know how to organize my current thoughts. There are to many factors in life and to me, life is overwhelming, confusing, hard, chaotic, a puzzle, uncontrollable- it's too much and it's too hard.

I want to become an ENTP. I want to be like Barney Stinson, the Joker, Bugs Bunny, Tom Sawyer, Tyler Durdan, Jack Sparrow, Ferris Bueller, Tony Stark.. some are arguably not ENTP, but I hope you understand what I'm looking to become. I want to not be so emotional.. I want to be clever, tough, adventurous, brave, quick-witted, persuasive, and most of all, in control.

Like an INFP, ENTPs see the world as full of possibilities, the difference is that they know how to navigate it.

Please tell me specific steps I can take, actions I can do, thoughts I can think to become an ENTP. Thank you.

So you want to be a sadist, an arsonist, and someone who screw other people up for your own benefit?

No dude... Its not easy to be one.

 

[Standuble]

So you want to be a sadist, an arsonist, and someone who screw other people up for your own benefit?

No dude... Its not easy to be one.

I thought you were an ESTP?

 

[yenom]

There is the theory of positive self and negative self. Perhaps you are stuck between one and the other.

When your life is going downhill, you go to negative self. When things become better, and your go to your positive self.
But then don't try to be someone you are not, because thats just acting.
The mbti is just BS, it can't define who you are. Your life won't be better pretending to be something you are not.
Just learn to live with your personality if you are struggling with that, go talk to someone who can help you out.

You should watch that episode in the simpsons where Lisa pretend to be someone else, but in the end she cannot escape herself. I think that should help.

 

[1487610420]

I'm tired of being an INFP. All I ever do is feel, think and make myself promises to help me become a perfect person. I constantly break my promises. Everyday I wake up thinking, 'Today will be the day that I start life and become the ideal me.' I. Always. Fail. The fact that I can't change myself sickens me.

I'm irretrievably overwhelmed with emotions-the world is so beautiful and there's so much pain in it. I want every single human being to be happy, to be the best person they can be. It's too big though, I don't know how to help the world because it's too chaotic and I don't know everything, not even close. If I did know everything I wouldn't know how to organize that information, I don't even know how to organize my current thoughts. There are to many factors in life and to me, life is overwhelming, confusing, hard, chaotic, a puzzle, uncontrollable- it's too much and it's too hard.

I want to become an ENTP. I want to be like Barney Stinson, the Joker, Bugs Bunny, Tom Sawyer, Tyler Durdan, Jack Sparrow, Ferris Bueller, Tony Stark.. some are arguably not ENTP, but I hope you understand what I'm looking to become. I want to not be so emotional.. I want to be clever, tough, adventurous, brave, quick-witted, persuasive, and most of all, in control.

Like an INFP, ENTPs see the world as full of possibilities, the difference is that they know how to navigate it.

Please tell me specific steps I can take, actions I can do, thoughts I can think to become an ENTP. Thank you.

 

[pinkgraffiti]

yeah. you could try developing Te. that should be in your realm of possibilities.

You don't.

You realistically can't become an ENTP, but even if you could, it wouldn't make life any easier. ENTPs don't really know how to navigate - ENPs fly by the seat of our pants, riding the waves of possibility and new information, and sometimes we get swept under and scraped along the bottom. Js are more into the art of navigation, but they tend to lose the journey for focus on the map.

I used to do the same thing of waking up and trying to be perfect - I still get caught up in that sometimes - and it never works. But you can do one little thing to start moving that direction, and then another, and then another. You know how to change one little facet of yourself to be more like who you want to be. You know how to help one person in one little way - then another, then another. Baby steps, all the time, every day. You don't have to wake up and suddenly be where you want to be, all you have to do is start moving just a little bit in that direction, and then move a little more, and a little more. It's in movement that you can find yourself as the person you want to become, not in the stillness once the becoming is over. I am working on this one myself.

As an INFP you can be all those things you want to be - clever, tough, adventurous, brave, quick-witted, persuasive, and in control. You just will have to be them in your own INFP way. A clever INFP would probably be literate and witty. A tough INFP would probably be decisive and stand their moral ground. An adventurous INFP (I have a close friend who I believe is an adventurous INFP, by the way -) would probably be (she is) creative, exploratory, and flexible. A brave INFP would probably be ready to speak up against injustice. A quick-witted INFP would probably have that snarky dark sense of humor. A persuasive INFP would probably tug at others on an emotional and value-based level. An in-control INFP would know what she wants and be relentless about pursuing it.

You will never become your best self if you try to become an ENTP instead.

 

[10blackroses]

Don't worry about it. I'm an INxP, a feeler when it comes to my own life, a thinker when relating to the outside world. Believe me, there are pros and cons for every personality type. With thinking (especially in an NT combination) comes detachment; you don't "connect" with your peers, you rarely feel you belong, others definitely don't feel you belong, and your mind never fully relaxes - there's always something in your thoughts that you want to reach, but it stays just outside your grasp. With feeling combined with intuition comes the will to please. You want to belong, and in most ways you do, but you never stop feeling that there's more to it than what you're experiencing. None of these things are fun.
But, on the bright side, a Rational has an entertaining inner life. There are always interesting paradoxes to consider and funny hypothetical scenarios that can produce rather comical outcomes. A Rational with the right amount of mental stimulation will never get bored. An Idealist, on the other hand, often has the most rewarding relationships with friends and significant others, more so than any other group. In that way, as an INFP, your life will likely be more complete than it would if you were an ENTP.

When it comes to how to change types: There are two ways, and none of them are in the least bit recommended. Believe me, I've tried both.

The first one is not something you can control on your own. It requires a severe trauma from the outside; a terrifying moment or period that will either knock you out of your shell so you become hopelessly vulnerable, or knock you further into the shell that was already restraining you. If it hadn't been for certain childhood events, I'd probably be an ENFP. I'm not unhappy with how my personality turned out, but I know my life could be different. In your case, however, it would have been a disaster: You know yourself well enough to understand that you are an INFP, and a trauma of the dimensions I'm describing wouldn't only shake your emotions, but also everything you know and believe in. I'm an agnostic, but if I were to believe in God for a split second, I'd say something along the lines of "and I pray to God you won't have to go through any of that!"

The other way is less dramatic, but possibly even more unhealthy. It involves fooling yourself into believing you are something you're not, and this would leave you with no directions, ambitions or idea of what you are and where you're going. Being a drifter like that is difficult, and it bleeds you dry. No matter how far you go with this method, it will only drain you, and it won't actually make you an ENTP, just a vague image of one that you will be the only one to believe. No fun in that either.

My only advice is to research and check out ways that you can develop and nurture the best qualities of the INFP type; the best way to cope with the personality you have is to work with it and not against it. The most well-developed personalities, the ones that have understood and mastered their type to a T, are usually the happiest ones. That will take work too, but it won't leave you as something you're not, rather help you to be the best you can be.

 

[Poindexter Arachnid]

Smoke crack and have unprotected sex with strangers.

 

[Azure Flame]

Smoke crack and have unprotected sex with strangers.

lmfao

 

[Abbey]

An Idealist, on the other hand, often has the most rewarding relationships with friends and significant others, more so than any other group. In that way, as an INFP, your life will likely be more complete than it would if you were an ENTP.

My relationships are severely unrewarding. My life also feels incomplete in that aspect. I find that all of my friends never understand what I'm saying (they're mostly ESFx) or they just don't care. It leaves me very lonely and sad.

I feel like in my relationships I'm constantly giving and not recieving. I'm sorry if that sounds arrogant or victimizing.
I try to notice little things about people so I can use that information to help better them and make them happier. That's one reason I'm into MBTI types.
I find that I want real, valuable relationships and all my Fe dominant friends like being friendly to everyone, but not deep with anyone.
In conclusion, I feel severely misunderstood; my dominant Fi only causes me to feel hurt and lonely.

 

[Abbey]

I want to be an ENTP because they don't seem to care about pleasing people; they don't get hurt when they're misunderstood. They seem like the freest of all the types.

From what everyone is saying, I should be happy with being an INFP and just better myself as an INFP. I understand that, but I won't give up in trying to change into an ENTP to be honest. Maybe one day I'll realize you're all right, but for now, I'm not happy. What's the point in being yourself and unhappy?

 

[OrangeAppled]

I want to be clever, tough, adventurous, brave, quick-witted, persuasive, and most of all, in control.

see the world as full of possibilities....know how to navigate it.

You can be INFP and be/do all of that. There are ENTP losers also.

You can be pretty much whoever you want to be. Whenever you say, "I can't do X because I'm Y", then you're limiting yourself. Most of those limits are false and only in your head.

Your first step is to replace your negative and limiting thoughts with encouraging, positive ones. Treat yourself like you'd treat others who are down, depressed, and discouraged. If you wouldn't say it to your best friend, then don't say it to yourself. Stop reinforcing an identity...just like if you were to tell a kid they're stupid over & over, they may believe it & perform accordingly, if you're always telling yourself that you're too emo & misunderstood then that's what you'll live up to. Instead, just BE & respond in real time, without expectations for yourself or others, which is truly exploring possibilities as they arise, instead getting stuck on inner ideals.

We can talk about more steps after you mull that over & try it out. Plus, I have to go right now, but maybe I'll say more later.

 

[Abbey]

Wow. Thank you. I needed to hear this.

 

[10blackroses]

My relationships are severely unrewarding. My life also feels incomplete in that aspect. I find that all of my friends never understand what I'm saying (they're mostly ESFx) or they just don't care. It leaves me very lonely and sad.

I feel like in my relationships I'm constantly giving and not recieving. I'm sorry if that sounds arrogant or victimizing.
I try to notice little things about people so I can use that information to help better them and make them happier. That's one reason I'm into MBTI types.
I find that I want real, valuable relationships and all my Fe dominant friends like being friendly to everyone, but not deep with anyone.
In conclusion, I feel severely misunderstood; my dominant Fi only causes me to feel hurt and lonely.

I don't think it sounds arrogant or victimizing at all. I've been there too, I've been exploited by "friends" and received next to nothing in return, so no lack of understanding there. But seriously, stop beating yourself up for that. Has it ever occurred to you that you might simply have the wrong kind of friends? It's not a given that any type on N goes well with any kind of S - I, for one, come from a family which is composed almost entirely of SJs, and with my NP combination it's quite natural that I don't quite fit in. I've always been the black sheep whoever I've been with, and most Ns who associate mainly with Ss will always be the black sheep.
But being tough once goes a long way. If your friends are taking advantage, they're not really your friends at all, and then walking away from them is not at all a betrayal, only self-preservation. It's better to walk away before they take everything you have, than to let them take it and leave you with absolutely nothing. Breaking the pattern once is enough - once you're done with people who can't appreciate an INFP for what she is, you can start looking for people who actually appreciate black sheeps the way we deserve

 

[Venom]

I'm tired of being an INFP. All I ever do is feel, think and make myself promises to help me become a perfect person. I constantly break my promises. Everyday I wake up thinking, 'Today will be the day that I start life and become the ideal me.' I. Always. Fail. The fact that I can't change myself sickens me.

I'm irretrievably overwhelmed with emotions-the world is so beautiful and there's so much pain in it. I want every single human being to be happy, to be the best person they can be. It's too big though, I don't know how to help the world because it's too chaotic and I don't know everything, not even close. If I did know everything I wouldn't know how to organize that information, I don't even know how to organize my current thoughts. There are to many factors in life and to me, life is overwhelming, confusing, hard, chaotic, a puzzle, uncontrollable- it's too much and it's too hard.

I want to become an ENTP. I want to be like Barney Stinson, the Joker, Bugs Bunny, Tom Sawyer, Tyler Durdan, Jack Sparrow, Ferris Bueller, Tony Stark.. some are arguably not ENTP, but I hope you understand what I'm looking to become. I want to not be so emotional.. I want to be clever, tough, adventurous, brave, quick-witted, persuasive, and most of all, in control.

Like an INFP, ENTPs see the world as full of possibilities, the difference is that they know how to navigate it.

Please tell me specific steps I can take, actions I can do, thoughts I can think to become an ENTP. Thank you.

My first posts on this forum from 2008 honestly seem like a different person. Completely honest. I would not know him. I typed INFP at the time (Babyylon Candle anyone?).

How old are you? The type purists are wrong to say type doesn't/can't change. People who are agnostic to type (ie just simple brain studying people) can tell you that the brain does change in such a way that our personalities, some parts, DO change sometimes drastically even into our twenties.

No, a true INFP wont become an ENTP. However, it's easy to imagine that a teenager/early twenties ENTP who has high neuroticism and social anxiety could easily mistake themselves for being "F" and "I" depending on hiw they chose to read into the type theories. You could conceivably grow out of those things, maybe. hell even you example of Barney stinson was a complete introvert save the world wuss until his gf dumped him and he banged a heartless cougar as his first lay! (first season).

You can't have a brain transplant, but an environment transplant can almost be the same thing if your the type of person to be easily affected by such things.

Many peoples "type problems" on this forum are actually just neuroticism issues. It took me a long time to realize that, but I'm now fairly certain of it. "deep thinking" on identity issues just makes the problem worse. You need to think about how you're going to change your environment and the way you react to it. Get out of your head! Accomplish that and you'll be happy being any type.

 

[10blackroses]

Many peoples "type problems" on this forum are actually just neuroticism issues. It took me a long time to realize that, but I'm now fairly certain of it. "deep thinking" on identity issues just makes the problem worse. You need to think about how you're going to change your environment and the way you react to it. Get out of your head! Accomplish that and you'll be happy being any type.

Yep, there you go. I know many people with slightly neurotic issues whose types would probably be seen otherwise if they didn't have those traits. I'm one of them myself too. I think it all comes down to one thing: Whether you are a depressed INFP (any depressed type would be prone to wishing they were different) or a not fully developed version of another type. Not to be an INFP hater (I really shouldn't be, I'm practically an INFP myself), but they are statistically the type most prone to depression and mental issues. BUT: As Venom pointed out, we might have it the wrong way around - it may not be the INFP that make these problems pop up, maybe it's the problem that makes some non-INFPs seem like INFPs even when they're not. So: Find out first if you're really an INFP and work your way from that. I'm sure things will turn out fine, and I was hurting myself for years, so if I say things will be fine, I'm pretty darn sure it will.