Ask an INTJ

[freeeekyyy]

I observed to an INTJ whom I've known personally for years, "You're opportunistic about logic. You use logic here as it suits your needs, and you use illogic there as it suits your needs."

His reply: "That's not illogic, that's IN-logic."

Any comments from the INTJ side?

Edit - "IN" does not stand for anything, it's just the word "in."

Well, INTJs are a primarily irrational type. Ni is kind of crazy and just does things it's way, regardless of the correctness of it. We aren't thinking dominant. This is less of an issue with more mature INTJs, who have better access to Te.

Usually there's a reason for believing what we believe, but trying to communicate that to others (especially ITPs) can be very difficult.

[INTPness]

Well, INTJs are a primarily irrational type. Ni is kind of crazy and just does things it's way, regardless of the correctness of it. We aren't thinking dominant. This is less of an issue with more mature INTJs, who have better access to Te.

Usually there's a reason for believing what we believe, but trying to communicate that to others (especially ITPs) can be very difficult.

I totally believe you on all of this (why wouldn't I?), but it seems crazy to me because you guys seem so darn "structured" and that you fit well within organizations and such. From the outside (not always seeing what goes on interally within a person), it's the NP's that seem to "do things however they want" regardless of whether it's correct and to invent new ways of breaking rules and blazing their own path, etc.

It must be simply because I'm "seeing" Te, but I'm "not seeing" Ni. It's just so strange to me to hear an INTJ saying that they are basically unstructured, because the outer image seems so much the opposite of that. Plus you guys always say that NP's ramble too much, aren't focused, etc. I'm just going to start getting crazy, buck-wild Ne with all the INTJ's I work with. I'm going to disregard the structured Te facade and just target Ni with my Ne musings. What's the worst that can happen, right? I'll either strike out (back to square 1 - no Ne), or I'll hit it over the fence and we'll have an N-fest.

[freeeekyyy]

II'm just going to start getting crazy, buck-wild Ne with all the INTJ's I work with. I'm going to disregard the structured Te facade and just target Ni with my Ne musings. What's the worst that can happen, right? I'll either strike out (back to square 1 - no Ne), or I'll hit it over the fence and we'll have an N-fest.

Might not be a bad thing to try. Ne is fun.

[knight]

does the idea of Domination, submission turn you on or do anything for you?

[bionic]

does the idea of Domination, submission turn you on or do anything for you?

Let's experiment on this. You'll be my first victim.

[knight]

what are things in the work place that really piss you off?

[katharine12]

what are things in the work place that really piss you off?

Chatterboxes. I like to talk to my coworkers (sometimes...), but really, I'm here to do a job, and I can't do that if I spend 4 hours listening to your problems.

Bureaucracy. There are times when I know what I need to do, how to do it, and when to do it, but for whatever reason, my hands are tied behind my back by rules, regulations, and more regulations.

Politics. It's especially bad with women (sorry!), but I can't just walk up to someone and say, "Hey, can I have this file?" or whatever. I have to engage in small talk I don't particularly care for BEFORE I can make my request.

Repetition. 'Nuff said.

(I realized, half way through writing this post, that I could've copied INTPness' post on the Ask an INTP thread, deleted a bunch of stuff, and still had what I finally produced. Talk about getting to the point. :P)

[ceecee]

does the idea of Domination, submission turn you on or do anything for you?

Both.

[Xyk]

Would you rather be in a relationship with someone who will allow you complete control of the relationship (or almost complete), take complete control for themselves (or almost complete), or someone who will stand their ground and treat you like an equal, expecting the same in return?

I ask because an INTJ very close friend of mine (and ex-girlfriend) was in an on-and-off relationship with this very submissive guy for like 6 years but would often complain that he couldn't stand up for himself, but when the two of us dated (during one of the off parts of the long relationship), I did not submit or control but the relationship went nowhere and she ended it after about a month. Granted, I may have mocked her religion while we were discussing something, not thinking she would take it personally.

She seems to like being the boss but also likes to complain about other people not being independent or standing up for themselves.

[ceecee]

Would you rather be in a relationship with someone who will allow you complete control of the relationship (or almost complete), take complete control for themselves (or almost complete), or someone who will stand their ground and treat you like an equal, expecting the same in return?

I ask because an INTJ very close friend of mine (and ex-girlfriend) was in an on-and-off relationship with this very submissive guy for like 6 years but would often complain that he couldn't stand up for himself, but when the two of us dated (during one of the off parts of the long relationship), I did not submit or control but the relationship went nowhere and she ended it after about a month. Granted, I may have mocked her religion while we were discussing something, not thinking she would take it personally.

She seems to like being the boss but also likes to complain about other people not being independent or standing up for themselves.

I'd have a VERY tough time being with someone who couldn't stand up for themselves or wasn't independent. I have no issue with partners being on equal footing although there will always be areas one ipartner may have more power than the other, not necessarily over the other. The INTJ you're describing isn't going to be in a successful relationship until they find out what they really want. It almost sounds like she wanted submission yet wanted them to fight back at the same time. My enjoyment of D/s is sexual in nature although it bleeds outside those lines at times. It has no bearing on how we function day to day, parenting, our careers etc.