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[INTP] Sad INTP

SolitaryWalker

Tenured roisterer
Joined
Apr 23, 2007
Messages
3,504
MBTI Type
INTP
Enneagram
5w6
Instinctual Variant
so/sx
Blue, I don't know if that's exactly the best advice. Depressed INTJ might need to get away from their imagination rather than dive right in -- or at least the imagination would need to be diverted significantly.

That is true, when we are depressed we overindulge in our dominant function. To get out of this, we need to find balance. However, the INTJ needs to do at his own pace. As an introvert the motivation must come primarily from within. When he seems ready to move on to extroverted thinking, give him inspiration then, but not until.
 

Sunshine

New member
Joined
Apr 25, 2008
Messages
1,040
MBTI Type
ABCD
Enneagram
4
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
He says he's not satisfied with his social life.
What should I say back?
 

Haphazard

Don't Judge Me!
Joined
Apr 14, 2008
Messages
6,704
MBTI Type
ENFJ
He says he's not satisfied with his social life.
What should I say back?

Well actually I already responded before and I think I just make things worse =( but I was wondering what to say if he brings it up again.

"Wanna go to a movie or something?"
 

DigitalMethod

Content. Content?
Joined
May 4, 2008
Messages
970
MBTI Type
INTJ
That is true, when we are depressed we overindulge in our dominant function. To get out of this, we need to find balance. However, the INTJ needs to do at his own pace. As an introvert the motivation must come primarily from within. When he seems ready to move on to extroverted thinking, give him inspiration then, but not until.

I think Hap is right, our (INTJs) imaginations often turn very dark and pessimistic while in depression. However, I still think the original advice BlueWing gave would work with an INTJ, it would be positive, however I think it could be better. Yes, engage our imaginations, but don't let go of our hand. The best would be subtle positive stimulation of our imaginations.

However, the INTJ needs to do at his own pace. As an introvert the motivation must come primarily from within. When he seems ready to move on to extroverted thinking, give him inspiration then, but not until.

Very well said.
 

Priam

New member
Joined
Dec 20, 2007
Messages
272
MBTI Type
INTP
He says he's not satisfied with his social life.
What should I say back?

What Hap said, basically. We do not hint, we do not play games... you ask us what's wrong and, to the best of our ability and trust level, we tell you. End of story.

He wants a social life. Ask him if he wants to do something with you. Preferably give him a small slate of options angled towards his interests that still gets him into the world and see if he takes you up on it.
 

Ishida

New member
Joined
May 5, 2008
Messages
132
MBTI Type
INTJ
INTJ

INTJs' precision thinking and need for accuracy causes them to be inflexible at times. Having thought out a strategy, the INTJ may stubbornly disregard those who they think have not spent as much time reflecting on an idea as they have. This, along with their drive to produce something significant, can make them demanding and difficult. If their plans and solutions fall short of their high standards, INTJ's feel pressured - as if everything is on the line. "Everything," for an INTJ, is the competence and ability to produce something significant. Fear of not living up to this expectation will increase their stress and possibly dissuade them from risking or trying out their ideas. They may then find themselves thinking about ideas that do not have a meaningful or productive end.

When stress increases, the INTJ can become argumentative and disagreeable. Social interaction, which is not their strength, becomes increasingly difficult for them. Not trusting their own abilities, they become preoccupied with obsessive notions. The INTJ may then find themselves spending an inordinate amount of time fighting horrible thoughts, tempting absurdities, and feelings of worthlessness. Fearful of others recognizing their perceived failure, the INTJ incessantly ruminates about mistakes, inadequacies, weaknesses, ineptness, and incompetence. Because this distracts them from risking what little confidence they may have left in themselves, it therefore keeps them from obtaining the success and achievement they so desperately need.

Interesting and even accurate.
When I was sort of depressed, I started thinking not only of worthlessness and weakness of myself, but of everything. Pretty much thinking of nihilistic interpretation of atheism and that it may as well be true. People did not enjoy me..

I'm like the only guy in the world who doesn't know an INTP in real life. I normally have to deal with a ISFJ, but I use cold logic to try and comfort her. ("I'm weak and suck at martial arts" in which I reply "Then let's practice so you'll get better!")
 

Eric B

ⒺⓉⒷ
Joined
Mar 29, 2008
Messages
3,621
MBTI Type
INTP
Enneagram
548
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
I've been depressed about things, and I can attest to that description about "shooting
things down" with logic when people try to help.
I've been wondering how much depression ties in with Fi, especially since Beebe is reported to have tied it and anxiety with Fi's "integrity" issues:
INFJ or INFP? a closer look

So for an INTP, that would be shadow. I see there are also a couple of threads on ENFP's and depression, and from some descriptions, it sounds somewhat similar.
I'm also wondering how much it has to do with Ni and Se. However, most other INTP's seem to have good use of these functions. However, in theory, in it's negative shadowy form, it creates a destructive loop that lends to feelings of worthlessness.
 

finnegan

New member
Joined
May 9, 2009
Messages
7
MBTI Type
INTP
Actually, the best advice I ever got was from a psychologist who didn't believe that SSRI's actually work as antidepressants. I was skeptical when he told me about his SSRI theory, but then he said that he believed depression was situational - when you get depressed, you're in a bad situation that you need to identify and get out of. After that meeting, I threw out the antidepressants that my family MD had given me (thanks for the 5 minute consultation & 30-pack of SSRIs), figured out why I was depressed (I was in the wrong job), made a plan to get out, and then acted on it. Even though I didn't get out of that job for another year, I wasn't depressed any more since I had a plan and was acting on it.

I think the first thing to do is to get him out of the introspection loop by getting him to think why he's depressed, then working on a plan to change his situation. Once he starts thinking about the plan, the possibilities will open up for him and he'll let the other stuff go.
 

Kungpowish

New member
Joined
May 7, 2009
Messages
103
MBTI Type
ENFJ
Enneagram
two
Actually, the best advice I ever got was from a psychologist who didn't believe that SSRI's actually work as antidepressants. I was skeptical when he told me about his SSRI theory, but then he said that he believed depression was situational - when you get depressed, you're in a bad situation that you need to identify and get out of. After that meeting, I threw out the antidepressants that my family MD had given me (thanks for the 5 minute consultation & 30-pack of SSRIs), figured out why I was depressed (I was in the wrong job), made a plan to get out, and then acted on it. Even though I didn't get out of that job for another year, I wasn't depressed any more since I had a plan and was acting on it.

I think the first thing to do is to get him out of the introspection loop by getting him to think why he's depressed, then working on a plan to change his situation. Once he starts thinking about the plan, the possibilities will open up for him and he'll let the other stuff go.

This actually connects to the theory that happiness can come, in large part, from a feeling of control. When we feel like we are the master of our fate it picks us up and feeling helpless or stuck makes us depressed. So when you decided to change jobs you took control and felt better. Your friend may feel like they can't do anything to change the way they feel and that would contribute to said feelings. I don't have any specific suggestions but anything that would make them feel like their decisions matter might help.
Good luck :hug:
 

ConchShell

New member
Joined
Jun 25, 2008
Messages
79
MBTI Type
ENFP
Actually, the best advice I ever got was from a psychologist who didn't believe that SSRI's actually work as antidepressants. I was skeptical when he told me about his SSRI theory, but then he said that he believed depression was situational - when you get depressed, you're in a bad situation that you need to identify and get out of. After that meeting, I threw out the antidepressants that my family MD had given me (thanks for the 5 minute consultation & 30-pack of SSRIs), figured out why I was depressed (I was in the wrong job), made a plan to get out, and then acted on it. Even though I didn't get out of that job for another year, I wasn't depressed any more since I had a plan and was acting on it.

I think the first thing to do is to get him out of the introspection loop by getting him to think why he's depressed, then working on a plan to change his situation. Once he starts thinking about the plan, the possibilities will open up for him and he'll let the other stuff go.
Thanks for sharing that. Very useful way to think.
 
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