Cranky
New member
- Joined
- Oct 5, 2009
- Messages
- 240
- MBTI Type
- INTJ
- Enneagram
- 5w6
I imagine an INTJ might snap if enough stuff happened to them that was out of their control. Or something gone wrong in an interpersonal relationship that brought about all of these new feelings they couldn't avoid, no matter how hard they tried...
I've snapped three times; once was someone dying, once was getting thrown out of school, and once was being rejected by the person I loved.
Attack an INTJs fundamental values and you are in for a hell of a fight. That is going straight for their weak Fi by which they reason the ethics of their ideologies and all the choices they make in their day to day lives. Argue that their values are distorted or wrong and it's like kicking at the supporting beam of all their reasoning and beliefs. You manage to shake it for one second, make them doubt the basis by which they have built all their beliefs, and the reaction could only be described as "snapping". All the emotion that an INTJ would normally control from influencing their thinking, is suddenly released, often in a very vicious and malevolent way.
This is a weak person, not an INTJ. I don't have ONE supporting beam; I have many. If you question my values and I start to agree with you, I have many other legs to stand on while I repair the one you kicked out from under me.
Generally INTJs (The seriously competitive ones) generally explode at some point, generally its the first relationship that pretty much does it, or any other situation where infinite logic and thought still will not remedy the situation.
Yes...being romantically rejected by someone when there's no good REASON for them to have done so has sent me into an infinite loop. When there's no good REASON for them to leave (like a fundamental incompatibility in religion or age or desired number of children, etc...), then I am being personally, deliberately rejected for who I am.
I remember when I thought I was going to be expelled...
I barely moved, I barely ate, and that went on for about four days. Every time I stood up I thought I was going to throw up. I was so sure that they were going to expel me and throw away my future without giving me a second chance.
But you know, looking back on it, it doesn't look like so much.
I had the same experience, but it lasted for months. Talk about a breakdown; I gained 50 pounds and didn't leave my house for weeks at a time. A sense of inevitability paralyzed me and left me incapable of taking steps to remedy the situation...but leaving on my own would have been just as much a failure.
The INTJs I have known (and there have been admittedly few of them) have not blown up ever. It seems like INTJs just don't blow up. They act as if. If they want to be happy, they act as if. If they want to be confident, they act as if. The few feelings they have are eaten and it would take an enormous amount for them to be overwhelmed by their feelings. I could see them dying of cancer at an early age or maybe becoming a serial killer, but not blowing up.
Then you don't know ANY INTJs intimately. We HIDE when we're broken out of shame at our perceived incompetence, and only a VERY few people will ever see the personal effect it has on us, regardless of how many see the failure.
I don't think they ever completely crack. I think they may fracture, sometimes extremely, compartmentalize, push forward, heal and/or push the stressors out of their mind and move on.
See above.
I suspect one way to crack an INTJ is actually to take away his Se. That small modicum of contact with the outside world and the opportunity to do and see things. Pressure builds up in Fi as Ni/Te bloats with instructions on what to do that don't get done. Hanging out with ENXJs too much will do it. Giving a billion ways to think about stuff but no way to implement will do it. But it takes a while. You have to let him see the world passing him by in ways that he wishes it wouldn't.
The overloaded Fi eventually bursts out and drags the Se with it, and you get the drunken, bloodied and tearful ESFP we all love.
Oh yeah. That drunken, bloodied, and tearful ESFP is me right at the moment...within extremely controlled boundaries so I can reduce the effect of going nuts on myself and on others.
5. Denial that anything is wrong. Grasp the Te by the horns and FORCE it to keep going forward. Afterall, feelings are just feelings and when things need to be done, the feelings have to take a back seat. A short lived triumph at pushing on is soon replaced by a frantic thought of 'I can't do this...' which is even more scary because I like to feel like I can do anything. In fact... during times of stress I've said that phrase to myself so often that it has blurred into one word. "Icandothis. Icandothis." I am Near panic.
6. Complete surrender to all whims and desires. I am suddenly on a kind of 'kamikaze', hell bent trail to have 'fun' at any cost. I drink, I dance, I sing karaoke, I invite that guy over who stays on the 'booty call' list, I. I. I.... It becomes ALL about me (moreso than usual) and it tends to happen very quickly... like a firecracker going off. Seems that the tighter I try to hold onto that 'Icandothis' stage, the harder it hits when I break.
Icandothis becomes Firstthingsfirst for me. Perchance that repetitive chanting of instructions to oneself is part of when you can tell we're about to crack?