[Other] The Moral Dilemmas of ThatGirl

[JAVO]

I'd pay him back, and probably not anonymously. But, there's the potential complication that he could be very angry, or just look you up somehow and try to start staying in touch again. You'd have to weigh in your safety and desire to avoid an uncomfortable, complicated situation.

 

[ThatGirl]

His name is really fucking common!

I don't think he is on facebook, and the ones that seem like he may be the person, right name, age, and area, only have info if you pay for it....

 

[JAVO]

That must be a French name?

I'd just forget about it then. You tried to repay within reason, and you weren't an adult then.

 

[Jaguar]

Poor John Smith.

 

[highlander]

Well, today I remembered this out of the blue. Despite what my feelings were when I was seventeen, I never did get a chance to pay the money back. Suddenly today the man's name popped in my head out of nowhere, and I absolutely hate this memory.

Should I try to find him, and pay the money back, or if not, how do I feel better about this?

If you have the money, square it up with him. Move on.

I agree with Jaguar. Pay him back. Tell him it was you. Say you are sorry. Move on.

Sounds like no fun. Sorry that happened to you!

Edit: I have a good friend who borrowed money from me when he had none. He never paid me back. I kept this memory for many years and never told him about it till recently. Dumb really. Would have been better to square it earlier.

 

[Elfboy]

Someone leaves a brand new loaf of bread with the top wide open. TG takes the pieces three down, and leaves the bread still open.

Bad morale?

Good morale?

your usage of the word morale is inaccurate. morale is the collective fighting spirit of an army in the midst of battle. for example, one army may have 10,000 men while the other has only 5,000, but the latter army may have higher morale because they're better fed and rested and can still win off of higher energy, sharper mental functioning and peak physical strength and reflexes.

 

[ThatGirl]

I don't think I confused the terms.

 

[ThatGirl]

New moral dilemma:

So today I went out with a friend and we went to the mall. I will start by saying I am a horrible shopper. When I don't have money I am like, that's cute, oooh that too, ah I wish I had money to buy that!

When I do have a little extra cash to spend, I get very picky. Eh, that isn't worth it, I can find something better, etc etc.

So I go out with this friend and we are looking at things. She asks me what we want to buy, and tells me we should pick something similar out, her treat.

My first response was...."What? NO!... Lets go look for something for you. What are you looking for?"

She was like, "Nothing in particular..." I think I made her not completely uncomfortable, because we are good friends, but slightly. I felt like I killed the flow.


My question is, in situations like this, do you allow someone to buy something for you and get excited about it even if you wouldn't buy it for yourself, or do you say no thanks? I don't like feeling like I owe people for an act of kindness so that may be distorting my view, but Idk. I don't know if she wanted to do it, for the experience, and our hanging out. Something special and exciting?



Thoughts? What is the normal etiquette here?

 

[NotOfTwo]

In my experience it is very bonding for people to treat each other. I used to be very uncomfortable with allowing others to buy me anything at all, but I realized how happy it makes them. Just let her do it, pick something that isn't extravagant and let her be happy.
Don't forget to send card or wear it around her at least once.