[INTP] INTP Women and Being Romantic

[Hera]

Being romantic can mean a lot of things...

Of course it can. That's why what I wrote was how I see it, not a definitive meaning.

 

[Octarine]

A la "Black Swan," I prefer the incinerator myself.

There are some interesting experiments on Youtube involving teddy bears and fireworks. Is this not a romantic combination?

 

[Totenkindly]

There are some interesting experiments on Youtube involving teddy bears and fireworks. Is this not a romantic combination?

My love for you burns bright and fuzzy, baby!

 

[Fan.of.Devin]

The INTP (alleged... she typed as herself INTP but in retrospect I'm not really sure of her type) I was with was quite a piece of work in this regard...
Not only did she seemingly not appreciate gestures of kindness/romantic fuzzyness and whatnot, but it seemed like her interest in the relationship was basically inversely proportional to the amount of effort I would put into things, on levels both big and small.
Any sort of gesture on my behalf, she either found stupid and annoying, or didn't really comment on at all. The harder I would try, the harder she would push away. The harder she would push away, the harder I would try... Obvious recipe for disaster, right? Apparently not obvious enough, at the time.
But that much alone would have been pretty understandable; it got worse.
Inevitably, when I finally started realizing things were headed nowhere (schmuck...), and started to withdraw from the relationship myself and hint at us probably needing to wrap things up, she would suddenly get all fervent to keep things going, convince me that XYZ would change, that she would make more effort, etc.., just long enough for the above cycle to start all over again. >_>
Happened a handful of times before things finally -thank God- ended.

Granted, I'm not really sure how much of that whole mess, if anything at all, can be attributed to her type, rather than just to immaturity and inexperience on behalf of us both... I certainly wasn't perceptive enough to recognize the psychological aspect of the whole "passion paradox" thing at the time, or how I was probably intimidating her with clingyness.
She, at a later date, made claims that she did in fact appreciate romantic gestures and the like, but that she felt uncomfortable showing it, because of societal expectations or something? I was never really sure on that point, but regardless, the whole thing did teach me one very valuable lesson;

Sometimes... "The only winning move is not to play." - WarGames

 

[PH.]

What makes me swoon is a guy who has my back. And I don't mean somebody who fights my battles; I mean somebody who, when he sees that I am having a hard day, makes me sit down on the sofa and lets in some hot water into the bath tub while he makes me some hot cocoa. I find caring (almost motherly) gestures very romantic and endearing. Another thing that works very well are little gifts that show how well he knows me and my taste. Even having my favorite cookies in stock when I come over can be a big thing for me.

This.

It basically means that someone is truly interested in you and cares for you. That is the most romantic in my opinion. I don't like unpersonal gifts either, they mean nothing. When you get me something I really like, although you don't like it yourself or don't know why I do, is also very romantic.

What I like about the caring-part is that I sometimes find it difficult to take care of myself. I do too much and sorta fail to listen to my body. This doesn't mean I want to be nurtured like he is my father, just that he gives me a quick reminder that makes me take a step back and see for myself what I am doing.