[INTP] someone is wrong with me

[think2much]

I talked to someone for over 2hrs, I open up since I never met this person. He's pretty smart and he said i have problems. Everything he said is true, What bothers me the most is that i can't change. I'm just so depressed right now but I know no one can help me. The reason I posting is I wonder if someone went through with this? Maby it has nothing to do with being INTP

edit: wow this is so hard, I wish I was different or not born at all.

 

[Nicodemus]

I wonder if someone went through with this?

With what? Therapy?

 

[sciguy90]

Maybe his definition of 'problem' is different from a real problem.

 

[Shimmy]

I talked to someone for over 2hrs, I open up since I never met this person. He's pretty smart and he said i have problems. Everything he said is true, What bothers me the most is that i can't change. I'm just so depressed right now but I know no one can help me. The reason I posting is I wonder if someone went through with this? Maby it has nothing to do with being INTP

edit: wow this is so hard, I wish I was different or not born at all.

If it's that bad, get therapy. Is it a temporary episode or seasonal depression or are you always like this?

 

[Phantonym]

Depression is treatable. You can get through this. You're just not seeing it at the moment, because your judgment is clouded by all the negativity depression comes with. Think about it, why can't you change? Do you see all the things in the physical space around you and the way you can actually change them? You can rearrange your living space, you can move, you can change schools and jobs, etc. All that is possible, so couldn't it be that it is possible to rearrange your mental space as well?

You are right, no-one can help you unless you're willing to help yourself. You can't just snap your fingers and make things you don't like go away. You have to work at it and yes, it is hard.

Stop clinging to your INTPness, stop looking for negative traits within you, stop looking for outside validation and start doing something about you being so miserable. You're already reaching out, you've talked to someone and you've been here sharing all this, so what is stopping you to go further with it? Your own negative thoughts are holding you back. Seek help or find it within you to start helping yourself in a healthy way and keep on going. Start small, try not to expect huge developments straight away but don't get discouraged.

Sure, it's easy to dismiss the things I've said here. You can find all the excuses in the world to argue against me. But the simple fact is, things will never change for you if you don't change them yourself. The choice is yours. Good luck.

 

[chachamaru]

You need a hug.

 

[prplchknz]

It's called being depressed, and has nothing to do with type.

 

[Athenian200]

I talked to someone for over 2hrs, I open up since I never met this person. He's pretty smart and he said i have problems. Everything he said is true, What bothers me the most is that i can't change. I'm just so depressed right now but I know no one can help me. The reason I posting is I wonder if someone went through with this? Maby it has nothing to do with being INTP

edit: wow this is so hard, I wish I was different or not born at all.

I'm confused... I can't tell what your problem is. You told us that someone told you that you have problems that are depressing you, but you haven't made it clear what your problem is? I mean, do you have a disorder, are you having social problems, do you overanalyze and underachieve, or what?

 

[think2much]

I'm confused... I can't tell what your problem is. You told us that someone told you that you have problems that are depressing you, but you haven't made it clear what your problem is? I mean, do you have a disorder, are you having social problems, do you overanalyze and underachieve, or what?

I'm anti-social, I always been this way. I never wanna do anything and I don't care about anything/anyone other than myself. I fail at life and I just want to give up.

My health insurance doesn't cover Therapy, even if it did I don't see how they can change me. He even told me to go to therapy but he knew I wasn't gonna listen to him. I know deep inside that I'll never be happy.

 

[Nicodemus]

What keeps you from committing suicide?

 

[Athenian200]

I'm anti-social, I always been this way. I never wanna do anything and I don't care about anything/anyone other than myself. I fail at life and I just want to give up.

My health insurance doesn't cover Therapy, even if it did I don't see how they can change me. He even told me to go to therapy but he knew I wasn't gonna listen to him. I know deep inside that I'll never be happy.

Well, why is it so bad that you're anti-social and only care about yourself? It might not be attractive to other people, but there are plenty of things you can do in life that don't require anyone to like you.

I mean, you can post on forums like this, you can listen to music, you can study various subjects, you can play video games, you can... well, do a lot of things.

There are myriad ways you can add value to your life. You don't need to feel like giving up just because of the way you are.

 

[think2much]

What keeps you from committing suicide?

My parents

Well, why is it so bad that you're anti-social and only care about yourself? It might not be attractive to other people, but there are plenty of things you can do in life that don't require anyone to like you.

I mean, you can post on forums like this, you can listen to music, you can study various subjects, you can play video games, you can... well, do a lot of things.

There are myriad ways you can add value to your life. You don't need to feel like giving up just because of the way you are.

because I can't get laid.
2 ways you can get laid being anti-social
1. Good looking
2. hooker

^ those two doesn't workout for me so I tried "pick up artist" but I still don't have the "game".


is not just that, if I was doing well in other areas I wouldn't be so depressed but I"m failing at every aspect in life. I just DON"T LISTEN.

ever since I was a kid I was always this way guess I held it in for so long that I just can't take it anymore and wanna give up.

 

[The_World_As_Will]

I'm anti-social, I always been this way. I never wanna do anything and I don't care about anything/anyone other than myself. I fail at life and I just want to give up.

My health insurance doesn't cover Therapy, even if it did I don't see how they can change me. He even told me to go to therapy but he knew I wasn't gonna listen to him. I know deep inside that I'll never be happy.

I agree with Phantonym's post but this isn't true at all. 1. Clearly you are not anti-social, if you were, you wouldn't be on this forum discussing the issue in the first place, secondly, you DO want to do something, you want the elimination of your current onset of depression, you want an elimination of a debilitating phenomena. Thirdly, you do care about things and others besides yourself, otherwise you wouldn't be here, nor would you let the initial person you talked to, who said that you have 'problems' affect you in the first place, you reached out, seeking some type of support, extending yourself shows that you do care. Do not fall into the trap that you don't care about anything, because you do. You do NOT fail at life, that doesn't even make sense, to whom's standard are you supposedly failing. life is your own, your decisions to make, it is not a pass or fail experiment.

Even if you cannot see an actual therapist at this moment, what you need is a community, as supporting system that will aide you along to getting better. when you say that 'they can't change you', their goal isn't to change you, as you are making the assumption that your entire being is sohow pre-destined to be depressed or miserable, which isn't the case at all, I know that you cannot see past this dark time in your life, but you are the only person that can facilitate any sort of change, or any movement towards positive well-being. As for a practical solution to help yourself, since you cannot afford a therapist at this time, there are other means in order to help alleviate your depression, though having an actual therapist in the future will help, I will recommend two things, firstly that you look into and integrate the practices of CBT (Cognitive Behavioural Therapy) into your everyday life, and secondly I recommend the book 'Learned Optimism' By Martin Seligmann, I think that it would help.

I would also recommend to do some type of creative activity in which you can absorb yourself in, it will atleast partially get rid of the negativity cloud of depression

 

[Athenian200]

because I can't get laid.
2 ways you can get laid being anti-social
1. Good looking
2. hooker

^ those two doesn't workout for me so I tried "pick up artist" but I still don't have the "game".


is not just that, if I was doing well in other areas I wouldn't be so depressed but I"m failing at every aspect in life. I just DON"T LISTEN.

ever since I was a kid I was always this way guess I held it in for so long that I just can't take it anymore and wanna give up.

Ah, I see... so it's all about sex. I think I see. That's why it's so crushing for you.

Well, I think if you work on getting some money, you can afford a "hooker," so that's what you need to focus on. Just realize that eventually, you'll probably find a job, and when you get enough money from that job, you'll be able to hire a prostitute. You can look forward to that, can't you?

 

[think2much]

couple years ago I actully believed that if I had amazing body It would improve my life, after hitting the gym for 2yrs I still couldn't get a girl. I stopped working out cause 2yrs of going to gym 5times a week all that work for nothing.
I just don't understand why I have such a low self-esteem. but you guys probably right I need to try harder to change, I don't even know where to find this community you are talking about.

Are you guys saying someone socially awkward, introverted, narcissistic and schizoid can change? Has anyone actully achieve this?

I know I can take meds,weed,drink to make my pain go away but I don't want to turn to them.

so frustrated right now I'm gonna go for a walk

 

[Nicodemus]

I know I can take meds,weed,drink to make my pain go away

You can also take those things and go out to find someone to have sex with.

 

[slowriot]

couple years ago I actully believed that if I had amazing body It would improve my life, after hitting the gym for 2yrs I still couldn't get a girl. I stopped working out cause 2yrs of going to gym 5times a week all that work for nothing.
I just don't understand why I have such a low self-esteem. but you guys probably right I need to try harder to change, I don't even know where to find this community you are talking about.

Are you guys saying someone socially awkward, introverted, narcissistic and schizoid can change? Has anyone actully achieve this?

I know I can take meds,weed,drink to make my pain go away but I don't want to turn to them.

so frustrated right now I'm gonna go for a walk

I can relate to most of this and yes you can get through it. Just dont expect immediate results. If you cant afford treatment maybe find some support group or other kinds of help. I consider myself a work in progress not just considering this. Have you considered that you might have been too focused on just one aspect and not the whole person. For instance some guys start working out like you to get better with women. But if you dont work on your psyche as much as you workout it doesnt do any good. You might be looking better but its still the same boring you inside.

Maybe a simple mental excercise where you once a day try and find just one positive thing about the day, could be a beginning.

You can also take those things and go out to find someone to have sex with.

this i a really good point aswell. Maybe try and go to other places. So you dont have luck at some fashionable disco, then go somewhere else.

 

[guesswho]

Go to therapy, it's what they do for a living, helping depressed people.

 

[Beargryllz]

helping depressed people.

Helping people is great. I highly recommend it. It's one of the best things you can do to feel good. OP should try some random acts of kindness and see if that helps. Even if it doesn't help you, you're still helping somebody, you're still an asset to somebody. Purpose is fulfilling.

 

[funkadelik]

Ah, I see... so it's all about sex. I think I see. That's why it's so crushing for you.

Well, I think if you work on getting some money, you can afford a "hooker," so that's what you need to focus on. Just realize that eventually, you'll probably find a job, and when you get enough money from that job, you'll be able to hire a prostitute. You can look forward to that, can't you?

Or he could use that money (or even the money you spent on going to the gym) to pay for a therapist (since your insurance doesn't cover it) and get some lasting benefits.

It's like Nicodemus said, you could drink, smoke week, take meds to make your pain go away temporarily and that's effectually what getting laid will do as well. It's a quick fix that probably won't turn out to be very fulfilling in the end. Focus less on "getting a woman" and more on "improving your self to be worthy of a woman."

Yes you can change. Allow yourself to get some outside help (ie. a therapist) to help you through the roughest bits and give you a sense of accountability. What have you got to lose? Seriously, what else could you think of to spend your money on when everything else seems pointless/worthless?