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[INTJ] How do INTJ's behave?

FallsPioneer

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How do INTJ's behave? I'm starting to doubt that I am one, and I was just wondering.

I think about that whole principle, "it's the behavior not the person," but I always thought that the behavior reflected the person (most of the time). I don't understand. Do personality types even behave in a certain way? Sometimes I think my behaviors aren't indicative of my preferences among the four dichotomies.
 

Athenian200

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How do INTJ's behave? I'm starting to doubt that I am one, and I was just wondering.

That's a very broad question, but I'll try to answer it.

From what I can tell, INTJ's come up with interesting systems and ideas that they're very confident in. They can be very passionate about these systems, and sometimes even extend some of that towards other people who try to understand and listen to them, depending on whether their Fi is developed.

However, they seem to have a tendency to not be as concerned with maintaining a system's integrity/consistency as they are with coming up with a way to make it work for their particular goal.

Also, they tend to respect competence, and not authority for it's own sake. However, I think they will usually at least pretend to give in to authority they don't respect if that's easiest way for them to reach their goal in the long run. Basically, they're goal-oriented like all TJ's, and they're also infused with the visionary/future-oriented Ni.

Does that make sense?
 

sinnamon

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The 2 INTJs that I know IRL are very opinionated. Once they have made up their minds about something, they are hard (or impossible) to dissuade. They develop complex plans and insist that everyone around them adhere to their plans and get extremely frustrated or angry when someone wants to go off in their own direction. In these situations they are both bullies.

I mean this as no sort of derision; just sometimes seeing the extreme of a type is helpful.
 

FallsPioneer

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That's way too broad. Give a specific scenario or something.

I know it's broad, but is there a general thing that INTJ's stick to?

Socially, for example. Are INTJ's almost always detached and cool, whether they're hanging out with a friend or at a party? Do they lack empathy?
 

disregard

mrs
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A lack of empathy has nothing to do with MBTT and everything to do with a personality disorder.

Edit: At least I think.. if type does correlate with empathy, then I'd have to reconsider my belief in the system.
 

Metamorphosis

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I know it's broad, but is there a general thing that INTJ's stick to?

Socially, for example. Are INTJ's almost always detached and cool, whether they're hanging out with a friend or at a party? Do they lack empathy?

No. There really aren't any absolutes. I've had friends that only saw me when I was around friends and were surprised when they found out I was an I. And even if we didn't have empathy we could still probably fake it well enough.
 

FallsPioneer

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That's a very broad question, but I'll try to answer it.

From what I can tell, INTJ's come up with interesting systems and ideas that they're very confident in. They can be very passionate about these systems, and sometimes even extend some of that towards other people who try to understand and listen to them, depending on whether their Fi is developed.

However, they seem to have a tendency to not be as concerned with maintaining a system's integrity/consistency as they are with coming up with a way to make it work for their particular goal.

Also, they tend to respect competence, and not authority for it's own sake. However, I think they will usually at least pretend to give in to authority they don't respect if that's easiest way for them to reach their goal in the long run. Basically, they're goal-oriented like all TJ's, and they're also infused with the visionary/future-oriented Ni.

Does that make sense?

Yeah it makes sense.
 

Athenian200

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I know it's broad, but is there a general thing that INTJ's stick to?

Socially, for example. Are INTJ's almost always detached and cool, whether they're hanging out with a friend or at a party? Do they lack empathy?

I would say that they usually try to come off as detached and cool, but they don't really lack empathy. They just have harder time expressing their Fi.

The best way I can think of to describe INTJ's emotions is that they're idiosyncratic. Their emotions come out in unusual, highly personal quirks rather than in ways you would typically expect (this is actually true of many IxTx's from what I can tell). Also, I think they're much more "cold" in more public/official situations or around a stranger than they are around a close friend one-on-one. Some of them learn to display emotion even though it's unnatural, but will retreat to their more cold, blunt manner if they feel placed on the defensive.
 

sinnamon

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Socially, for example. Are INTJ's almost always detached and cool, whether they're hanging out with a friend or at a party? Do they lack empathy?

Most I types appear that way, especially if they are highly introverted. I come across and very detached and cool to a lot of people. People often think I'm a snob, when really it's just that I'm very introverted, especially with unfamiliar people or situations. When I'm in a comfortable spot, though, I can be very animated. But then I have days when I'm pretty withdrawn even in my comfort zone.

As for empathy, I have it, but I find it hard to express. I never know what to say, and so often I say nothing, which makes it seem like I'm uncaring.
 

Metamorphosis

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A lack of empathy has nothing to do with MBTT and everything to do with a personality disorder.

Edit: At least I think.. if type does correlate with empathy, then I'd have to reconsider my belief in the system.

Why? You don't think that NF types can empathize easier than NT types?
 

FallsPioneer

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No. There really aren't any absolutes. I've had friends that only saw me when I was around friends and were surprised when they found out I was an I. And even if we didn't have empathy we could still probably fake it well enough.

Well, shit. How do you type an INTJ? Can you really not know one when you see one? I don't feel obligated at all to adhere to any sort of social convention and I could care less - I know that I do things 100% because I like it that way - but sometimes I try because I don't want others to feel uncomfortable. There are tons of instances where I'm alone with somebody, and I know they feel awkward, so I start up a conversation (which I'm not bad at, contrary to the usual INTJ image). Half of the time I'd rather be thinking about who knows what, but it's not that big a deal to me or else I would shut up. It's not like I'm "tolerating" people, I'm not an asshole.

I don't like the idea of people feeling uncomfortable because of me or something I'm doing (I really resent intimidating but I guess I can't consciously alter that.)

I can't even tell if what I'm doing is insincere; I mean, I guess I might have good intentions. I do try to be expressive emotionally, but sometimes it's awkward. And when I don't, after something serious comes up, it's like "What's with this guy?"
 

disregard

mrs
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From what I've read, empathy is the quality that distinguishes those with a healthy emotional state from those that are sociopaths. Given that, wouldn't that unfairly qualify NTs as more sociopathic?
 

nemo

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There's a big difference between having empathy and displaying it.
 

Metamorphosis

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From what I've read, empathy is the quality that distinguishes those with a healthy emotional state from those that are sociopaths. Given that, wouldn't that unfairly qualify NTs as more sociopathic?

I don't have a problem with socialized sociopaths. Would you care if your doctor was a sociopath if he was skilled and was the only person who could save your life? Same goes for lawyers, etc.
 

Metamorphosis

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Well, shit. How do you type an INTJ? Can you really not know one when you see one? I don't feel obligated at all to adhere to any sort of social convention and I could care less - I know that I do things 100% because I like it that way - but sometimes I try because I don't want others to feel uncomfortable. There are tons of instances where I'm alone with somebody, and I know they feel awkward, so I start up a conversation (which I'm not bad at, contrary to the usual INTJ image). Half of the time I'd rather be thinking about who knows what, but it's not that big a deal to me or else I would shut up. It's not like I'm "tolerating" people, I'm not an asshole.

I don't like the idea of people feeling uncomfortable because of me or something I'm doing (I really resent intimidating but I guess I can't consciously alter that.)

I can't even tell if what I'm doing is insincere; I mean, I guess I might have good intentions. I do try to be expressive emotionally, but sometimes it's awkward. And when I don't, after something serious comes up, it's like "What's with this guy?"

http://www.typologycentral.com/forums/nt-rationale/1868-intj-intimidation.html
http://www.typologycentral.com/forums/nt-rationale/2609-general-impressions-intj.html

dead eyes
 

FallsPioneer

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I get just as many "friendly"'s and "what a cool guy" as "intimidating." I always get "articulate," though.

I have to look through those threads in their entirety though (probably no way in hell with that 27 page intimidation one.)
 

FallsPioneer

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I think I understand wildcat's stuff more. But sure.

Edit: Oh, good God. I'll post again after reading that dissertation, which will be tomorrow.

And by that I mean thank you, looks like an interesting read.
 
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