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[INTJ] Hate an INTJ? Tell us why!

INTJs are...

  • Awesome!

    Votes: 51 65.4%
  • okay I guess... whats so special about them?

    Votes: 27 34.6%

  • Total voters
    78

Oaky

Travelling mind
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And then they wonder why INFPs might not think they're the greatest things to ever grace our presence.
Who's the ones wondering?
agl_ihateinfps_tn.jpg


Oh? It came from INTPcentral. Interesting.
 

Thalassa

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Some I want to push in front of a bus, take a picture of them bleeding in the street, then pretend to call 911 and walk away :whistling:

Wow, this tops "douse them in gasoline, set them on fire, and push them down the stairs."

And the fact that you even think that way makes me guess that you have more in common with INTJs than you claim. :laugh:
 

Craft

Probably Most Brilliant
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Who's the ones wondering?
agl_ihateinfps_tn.jpg


Oh? It came from INTPcentral. Interesting.

Hah, I'd say it's neat and somewhat a valid reflection of reality.
 

Jaguar

Active member
Joined
May 5, 2007
Messages
20,647
Some I want to push in front of a bus, take a picture of them bleeding in the street, then pretend to call 911 and walk away :whistling:

It warms my heart to know we have a true humanitarian in the forum.
 

tkae.

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Who's the ones wondering?
agl_ihateinfps_tn.jpg


Oh? It came from INTPcentral. Interesting.

:dry:

Wow, this tops "douse them in gasoline, set them on fire, and push them down the stairs."

And the fact that you even think that way makes me guess that you have more in common with INTJs than you claim. :laugh:

I wouldn't say it's INTJs I have things in common with.

It's xNTJs in general that I'm becoming more and more like whenever I get pissy. Thanks to my writing teacher (an ENTJ), who has a sailor's mouth and a sadist's smile. I've definitely developed my Ni since I started getting close to her and letting her help me grow as a writer.

That doesn't mean that my Fi enjoys taking punches any more than it did before I met her. It just means that she knows I'm sensitive and that I know she'll respect the boundary between unnecessarily critical and overly supportive. I know she'll kick my ass when I need it (and I trust her knowledge when it comes to that), but I know she'll help pick me up and dust me off when she's through and make sure I use her comments constructively.

Other xNTJs, though, I don't have that trust with. They have to develop it like she did, and my biggest issue of all with them is that most of them (even the healthy ones that I like) don't seem to be able to recognize that boundary between being themselves and being too harsh with me. They think they're being funny and clever when they're actually pushing me to the verge of tears :blushing:
 

Thalassa

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:dry:



I wouldn't say it's INTJs I have things in common with.

It's xNTJs in general that I'm becoming more and more like whenever I get pissy. Thanks to my writing teacher (an ENTJ), who has a sailor's mouth and a sadist's smile. I've definitely developed my Ni since I started getting close to her and letting her help me grow as a writer.

That doesn't mean that my Fi enjoys taking punches any more than it did before I met her. It just means that she knows I'm sensitive and that I know she'll respect the boundary between unnecessarily critical and overly supportive. I know she'll kick my ass when I need it (and I trust her knowledge when it comes to that), but I know she'll help pick me up and dust me off when she's through and make sure I use her comments constructively.

Other xNTJs, though, I don't have that trust with. They have to develop it like she did, and my biggest issue of all with them is that most of them (even the healthy ones that I like) don't seem to be able to recognize that boundary between being themselves and being too harsh with me. They think they're being funny and clever when they're actually pushing me to the verge of tears :blushing:


Interesting. I usually perceive them as being funny or clever, often helpful, even when they're being an ass I can often overlook it (unless I'm foolish enough to want something from them that they aren't willing to give). I think NTJs in general respect my sensitivity boundaries better than ENTPs for sure.

As much as I generally get along with ENTx girls, I know an ENTJ female who I have a love/hate relationship with...she's the only NTJ I know that actually makes me upset, but even the way she makes me upset is ANGRY. Like I feel her bulldozing me, and want to turn around and bulldoze her back. It's more of a battle for dominance rather than her making me cry...that doesn't happen.

I suppose this might be the difference between an ENFP who is conscious of using Te, and an INFP who may still be developing, or even still reject, Te.
 

tkae.

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Interesting. I usually perceive them as being funny or clever, often helpful, even when they're being an ass I can often overlook it (unless I'm foolish enough to want something from them that they aren't willing to give). I think NTJs in general respect my sensitivity boundaries better than ENTPs for sure.

As much as I generally get along with ENTx girls, I know an ENTJ female who I have a love/hate relationship with...she's the only NTJ I know that actually makes me upset, but even the way she makes me upset is ANGRY. Like I feel her bulldozing me, and want to turn around and bulldoze her back. It's more of a battle for dominance rather than her making me cry...that doesn't happen.

I suppose this might be the difference between an ENFP who is conscious of using Te, and an INFP who may still be developing, or even still reject, Te.

Te is definitely my weakness. I try, I really do! lol...

It just doesn't work so well :blushing:

Me trying to use Te is like a tone-deaf person trying to sing :cry:

Intuition is really where I find common ground with NTs. I guess it's why I can usually get comfortable around most xNTPs pretty easily, since our Ne lines up well.

INTJs though I have seriously trouble with since their Te kicks in from my heavy use of Fi and Ne almost instantly, and there's no way I can get past it. It's not that I mean to not like them. They just make me feel like shit :cry:
 

Thalassa

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Te is definitely my weakness. I try, I really do! lol...

It just doesn't work so well :blushing:

Me trying to use Te is like a tone-deaf person trying to sing :cry:

Intuition is really where I find common ground with NTs. I guess it's why I can usually get comfortable around most xNTPs pretty easily, since our Ne lines up well.

INTJs though I have seriously trouble with since their Te kicks in from my heavy use of Fi and Ne almost instantly, and there's no way I can get past it. It's not that I mean to not like them. They just make me feel like shit :cry:


Immature ENTPs and xSTPs make me feel worse, because they'll openly sit there and mock me for being sensitive. I'd rather be told what to do all day long, or spoke to in terse words (I kind of have a mean mouth myself, soooo....) than to be surrounded by an underdeveloped tert/inf Fe fest of "let's make fun of the NFP and annoy her in any way possible."

I don't know what it is, but if I'm in the wrong mood, certain TPs can push me over the edge into being completely irrational and feeling insecure.
 

Coriolis

Si vis pacem, para bellum
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Other xNTJs, though, I don't have that trust with. They have to develop it like she did, and my biggest issue of all with them is that most of them (even the healthy ones that I like) don't seem to be able to recognize that boundary between being themselves and being too harsh with me. They think they're being funny and clever when they're actually pushing me to the verge of tears :blushing:
Do you tell them when they cross this boundary? How else are we supposed to know what is "too harsh"? I find it hard to be anything other than myself, so I suspect I am often guilty of this, but I am never told so directly, so can't be sure.

But there are definitely some that do those things, and there are enough of them that I'm always on edge around a new INTJ until I see what kind of person they'll be :mellow:
I'm usually on edge around a new person until I see what kind of person they will be.
 

tkae.

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Immature ENTPs and xSTPs make me feel worse, because they'll openly sit there and mock me for being sensitive. I'd rather be told what to do all day long, or spoke to in terse words (I kind of have a mean mouth myself, soooo....) than to be surrounded by an underdeveloped tert/inf Fe fest of "let's make fun of the NFP and annoy her in any way possible."

I don't know what it is, but if I'm in the wrong mood, certain TPs can push me over the edge into being completely irrational and feeling insecure.

That's how xNTJs make me feel :shock:

I don't know enough people that have been typed xSTP to be able to say much about them. I know that the one ISTP I had interaction with on some forums, I thought he was cool. He was just joking enough about my sensitivity that it wasn't insulting, but had me laughing about it :blush:

He was a pretty healthy one though. So...

Do you tell them when they cross this boundary? How else are we supposed to know what is "too harsh"? I find it hard to be anything other than myself, so I suspect I am often guilty of this, but I am never told so directly, so can't be sure.

Rarely, if ever.

Usually by the time I'm to the point that something should be said, I'm hiding in my hole with a blanket over my head.

I'm usually on edge around a new person until I see what kind of person they will be.

Well, I mean beyond that. Of course there's the initial keeping looking at the ground and being terrified to open my mouth. But usually it's not a hyper-consciousness of them as a person, and it's just me being shy.

With INTJs, it's a hyper-consciousness. I'm on edge about every little movement they make until I know for sure whether or not I can relax around them or need to keep my guard up.

It's not that ya'll are bad people. Don't think that :cry:

It's just that some INTJs are bad enough that I have to suspect every INTJ until proven otherwise. And they blend in incredibly well. It's not even a healthy/unhealthy thing. I've met perfectly healthy INTJs that were the worst of all. I guess it's how many Feeler types the individual grew up around, or something like that.

But don't think it feels good having to judge an entire type just because a few are insensitive... I've met a bunch of INTJs that I consider very close friends. They just had to be patient enough to let it grow naturally :blush:
 

Thalassa

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That's how xNTJs make me feel :shock:

I don't know enough people that have been typed xSTP to be able to say much about them. I know that the one ISTP I had interaction with on some forums, I thought he was cool. He was just joking enough about my sensitivity that it wasn't insulting, but had me laughing about it :blush:

He was a pretty healthy one though. So...




Rarely, if ever.

Usually by the time I'm to the point that something should be said, I'm hiding in my hole with a blanket over my head.



Well, I mean beyond that. Of course there's the initial keeping looking at the ground and being terrified to open my mouth. But usually it's not a hyper-consciousness of them as a person, and it's just me being shy.

With INTJs, it's a hyper-consciousness. I'm on edge about every little movement they make until I know for sure whether or not I can relax around them or need to keep my guard up.

It's not that ya'll are bad people. Don't think that :cry:

It's just that some INTJs are bad enough that I have to suspect every INTJ until proven otherwise. And they blend in incredibly well. It's not even a healthy/unhealthy thing. I've met perfectly healthy INTJs that were the worst of all. I guess it's how many Feeler types the individual grew up around, or something like that.

But don't think it feels good having to judge an entire type just because a few are insensitive... I've met a bunch of INTJs that I consider very close friends. They just had to be patient enough to let it grow naturally :blush:

I can handle people who project dominance or speak bluntly. It's not that I'm never intimidated by their presence, but I have enough dominance in my own personality to not feel ... beat down?...by it. I admire it in some people. I'm not saying I love every TJ I've ever met (I actually used to be at silent war with my old ESTJ boss...he called me "a very demanding young lady" and it made me feel secretly proud that I could put a very controlling, heartless older ESTJ man even a little on edge. I don't know what that says about me. But, anyway, I hated that douchebag.)

On the other hand, there is something about Ti/Fe (it's especially when the Fe is immature, I think, I think immature or badly used/unhealthy Fe under the grip of Ti that's the problem) that makes me want to cry. It's the nasty precision with which they try to pick you apart, and their smug assurance that they are socially correct (Fe) to do so. Hypocrisy and unasked-for analysis of my character drives me batshit.
 

tkae.

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I can handle people who project dominance or speak bluntly. It's not that I'm never intimidated by their presence, but I have enough dominance in my own personality to not feel ... beat down?...by it. I admire it in some people. I'm not saying I love every TJ I've ever met (I actually used to be at silent war with my old ESTJ boss...he called me "a very demanding young lady" and it made me feel secretly proud that I could put a very controlling, heartless older ESTJ man even a little on edge. I don't know what that says about me. But, anyway, I hated that douchebag.)

On the other hand, there is something about Ti/Fe (it's especially when the Fe is immature, I think, I think immature or badly used/unhealthy Fe under the grip of Ti that's the problem) that makes me want to cry. It's the nasty precision with which they try to pick you apart, and their smug assurance that they are socially correct (Fe) to do so. Hypocrisy and unasked-for analysis of my character drives me batshit.

My ESTJ is the only one I have any feelings for, and even then we fight more than we say we love each other. We always love each other, I never think anything else. We just butt heads over the stupidest of things :cry:

Other than that, I avoid them like the plague. There's one I liked because we never got too close, but I think if we'd had to spend more than hour in an enclosed space, one of us would be dead...

But about the dominance thing... yeah. I have the dominance of a sedated koala :shock:

I think that's one reason why Fe really isn't something I think of as being all that bad. Fe-driven people never really notice me because I kind of blend into the background wherever I am. But yeah, now I remember why I never get on an xNFJ's bad side lol

If I wasn't good at blending, though, I definitely would be more scared of them than I am :cry:

And I've seen some of the Fi/Fe clashes around here, so luckily I've stayed away from those lol
 

Thalassa

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My ESTJ is the only one I have any feelings for, and even then we fight more than we say we love each other. We always love each other, I never think anything else. We just butt heads over the stupidest of things :cry:

Other than that, I avoid them like the plague. There's one I liked because we never got too close, but I think if we'd had to spend more than hour in an enclosed space, one of us would be dead...

I actually work for another ESTJ right now. He's cool, though, and it's probably because he's 80. He just has an amazing memory, and wants to dominate a captive audience to tell them about all of the things he did and accomplished and achieved throughout his eventful life.

He reminds me of a cross between my ISTJ grandfather (very paternalistic, watching out for me, making sure my physical needs are met, but asserting his father-figure-ly-ness) and my much younger ENTJ friend.

His wife is an ISFJ, I think. I can't imagine anyone else wanting to listen to his self-glorifying MONOLOGUES for more than an hour. But he's really nice to me. I think it's because he's old.

But about the dominance thing... yeah. I have the dominance of a sedated koala :shock:

I'm so dominant for an ENFP that I sometimes test as INFJ. Not that INFJs are dominant, but I think the strength of my tertiary gives me a J result. The weird thing is though, is that I like to be dominated by someone who can handle me. Being an ENFP I think means it's extremely tiring for me to *maintain* dominance long-term, my dominance can only come in Fi-motivated spurts...but I'll run all over someone who is super passive. It's probably why I like NTJs.

I think that's one reason why Fe really isn't something I think of as being all that bad. Fe-driven people never really notice me because I kind of blend into the background wherever I am. But yeah, now I remember why I never get on an xNFJ's bad side lol

If I wasn't good at blending, though, I definitely would be more scared of them than I am :cry:

And I've seen some of the Fi/Fe clashes around here, so luckily I've stayed away from those lol

Wow. Well, don't fret. It's okay, really. :hug:
 

Uytuun

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Mwell, some days all I have to do is look into the mirror.
 

skimpit

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Oh why not, let's resurrect this. The INFJ one recently got the treatment, so why not the thinking version, mm?

Today I got into a fight with my mom, a strong-willed INT. I'm not writing this because I got in a fight with my mom. If you're reading this thinking, she just wants to rant and is upset because she couldn't avoid the fight or was immature, it's not that. It's called I'm tired of fighting the crap she attempts to feed me.

She's emotional. Hella. Like stop, am I offending you? Did I wreck your plan? Oh no, now you'll have to put laundry away at 7:48 instead of 7:28, life's balls sweatie tm

She always seems to know when I'm criticizing her. I wouldn't be surprised if she knew I was writing this. I have no privacy, and she doesn't care to give it to me. She thinks every personal detail about her is secret, even her name. She's surprised when strangers know her name, and tries her best to get them to drop it. If you're thinking now that she's mentally ill, it's likely. But she's also INJ, and mean.

I won't let one bad experience with INTJs cloud my experience of them, but this certainly has left a mark. I've tried everything to get her to listen to me, to change her plans (because they stress her out - if that's the case, why follow them? It's fruitless!), try to change her point of view, explain myself clearly in every manner possible. Granted, in the past I wasn't up for this kind of thing but I changed of my own accord, and knowing she wouldn't notice, I still went ahead and bettered myself. This still doesn't impress her in the least, and only recently have I received the comment, "You're mature now. Doing adult things."

What drives me nuts about INJs is there's always miles and miles of subtext beneath every comment, more than any other type. There's subtext in every human interaction, but since they have Ni, they go straight for the jugular with symbolism and are offended if you don't get it, or even if you do. There's no winning.

When she argues, she argues hard and with no mercy, none - if I'm wrong, she will slice through my logic until I barely have a brain cell left to think with, and somewhere, she'll think she's clever. She even says to me, "I'm bigger than you. I'm smarter than you." I realize that's stereotypically INTJ and even sometimes I doubt her type, but the way she barrels through logic and just destroys people with sarcasm can't be anything else. At this point I've stopped fighting her, but I have sensitive emotions too. I get hurt easily, and whether that's a bad or a good thing, I can't tell. But the more she continues to roll over my feelings, the more dirt I'll have on her.

Today she wondered if I consider how she felt about things. I said yes, "I do, just not right now." Apparently that wasn't the correct answer. "You don't," she said firmly, looking me in the eye with the offense of a thousand suns. And and this point I wonder, why should I? If you're so complex and deep, you're not worth fighting for. Go use your Ni somewhere else, like a daycare where you can manage all the kids and turn them into soldiers. I'm sure they'll appreciate that symbolism wuwuwuwuwu

*explodes*
 

Lord Lavender

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In my personal experience me and INTJs tend to clash mostly due to Ne/Ni, Te/Ti and Fe/Fi clashes. We tend to however have strong respect for one another. The INTJs i have met on this site seem cool and interesting people if somewhat "formal and stuffy". They can offer good Te and Ni to help me use my Ne/Ti to the fullest though. We are fundamentally very different people but with work they can be some of the best freinds you can possibly have as they can be loyal and caring.
 

Yuurei

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I am waiting for someone to hate the INTJ


I hate unhealthy INTJ's of which I know many.

Those particular types I find synonamous with " angry nerd" and "internet troll". The ones who have an obvious inferiority complex and turn it into a superiority complex, constantly trying to prove they are smarter than everyone else by angrily nit-picking everything everyone says and showing off useless knowladge. Who respond to everyone asking for help/advice/a basic question with some snide comment, over simplifying a problem that they would never have because they would just deal with it like a boss-no they would not because they are terrified of confrontation/talking to people. I had a few INTJ roomates/friends. I had to deal with all the social stuff like talking to the landlord or ordering at a fast food place. This is probably a trait shared by many I's, and I don't mind, leading and taking care of my own is what I do, it just bugs me in this particular context.

I probably shouldn't go any further. I really hate the angry nerd type, and while I find most angry nerds are INTJ's not all INTJ are angry nerds. Just the insecure/unhealthy ones. I just happen to be surrounded by them. I think it is the area I live in that attracts them like a magnet
 
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