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[INTP] need help with a girl (I'm INTP)

think2much

New member
Joined
Sep 30, 2009
Messages
239
MBTI Type
intp
to make it short this is what happend
-no luck with ladies
-gave up and focus on goals


I can't believe I met someone but I did! she's not in my classes. It was a random conversation. I could tell she liked me so I said "we should hang out this weekend or whenever you're free". She gave me her number.

I have confidence but I don't like to flirt. She said txt me but I don't know what to txt. I wouldn't know what to do if we do "hang out". to be honest I'm a boring guy. I like to be alone almost all the time and I don't talk a lot.

I know this isn't a dating site but I can get more help by getting advice from INTP or someone who knows what kind of person I am.

What should I say to her?
 

Lady_X

Well-known member
Joined
Oct 27, 2008
Messages
18,235
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
784
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
what kind of things do you like to do that would be fun with someone else?
do you like museums?
comedy clubs?
movies? plays? or what

if it takes you awhile to open up and talk i wouldn't suggest some place quiet like dinner...i'd suggest something fun...good atmosphere...some activity you could do together maybe?

and then after you decide what you want to do with her i'd text her something like...movie sat? or something.
 

Windigo

New member
Joined
Dec 27, 2009
Messages
446
If she liked you enough to give you her number, I wouldn't worry about what to say. INTPs can talk a LOT to girls who share their interests (string theory, interstellar travel, cryptozoology and the like). And if she does share your interests then you two will find yourselves talking into the wee hours of the morning. If she doesn't share your interests . . . it probably won't work out no matter how hard you try. So in the immortal words of The Genie from Aladdin, "Bee yourself!" There are some cool girls that actually like the quietly intense INTP guy. : )
 

think2much

New member
Joined
Sep 30, 2009
Messages
239
MBTI Type
intp
oops, I guess I made double post. How can I delete this thread?
 

Oddly Refined

New member
Joined
May 27, 2009
Messages
230
Enneagram
5
to make it short this is what happend
-no luck with ladies
-gave up and focus on goals


I can't believe I met someone but I did! she's not in my classes. It was a random conversation. I could tell she liked me so I said "we should hang out this weekend or whenever you're free". She gave me her number.

I have confidence but I don't like to flirt. She said txt me but I don't know what to txt. I wouldn't know what to do if we do "hang out". to be honest I'm a boring guy. I like to be alone almost all the time and I don't talk a lot.

I know this isn't a dating site but I can get more help by getting advice from INTP or someone who knows what kind of person I am.

What should I say to her?

Possible Text Greetings

  1. Hey. How have you been?
  2. How is your week going?
  3. What have you been up to this week?
  4. Did you know? <insert random fact here>
  5. Have you heard that? <insert some also random weird factoid>

Once you transition into to asking this person out, I'd suggest you find an activity that requires some kind of interaction. (insert dirty thoughts here.) They key here is to find something that requires multiple kinds of interactions, so there is time for you to process and relax. You don't want to spend every second staring at them! (Well, you may, but that might feel kind of odd for the other person.)

Activities
  1. bowling
  2. arcade
  3. video games
  4. poetry readings
  5. some random event on campus
  6. A movie
  7. Coffee
  8. Bookstore
  9. Hiking
  10. Some other random activity that you both might enjoy

I hope this helps.
 

marquix

New member
Joined
Mar 30, 2010
Messages
62
MBTI Type
INTP
I would say, go out and exercise in preparation so that your body releases some endorphins and you stimulate your mind and body all at once.

Exercise makes you feel "cool", relaxed and secure.

Figure out what you want from the relationship. If you want to have fun like rides at an amusement park, dancing at a club or dip in a pool, just mention it and don't feel sorry later for never asking and losing your chance.

The universe will never punish you for following your heart and is bound to send more things your way sooner that you expect. You're doing something right, keep that up.
 

YoungGun2112

New member
Joined
Mar 23, 2008
Messages
40
MBTI Type
ENTP
I made a list too.

Possible text greetings:

  1. I set my Firefox to automatically click the random articles button on Wikipedia and just jerked off all over the place.
  2. Do you have a rape fantasy? BTW, your new blinds look great from the outside.
  3. I am a really big fan of Tiger Woods.
  4. I have a 14 incher and a giant wallet, lets go out and I might just use both on you.
  5. I so fucking hate that I wasted my sexual prime on Kelly Kapowski.
 

INTPness

New member
Joined
Jan 22, 2009
Messages
2,157
MBTI Type
INTP
Enneagram
5w4
I think texting is a blessing in disguise for a very quiet INTP trying to get to know someone slowly. Text away! Make her laugh. Say goofy stuff. Show the confidence that you say you have. I'm the same way. Through text and other forms of writing I can express my true self much better. I can easily say what's on my mind because I have time to think it through.

Use your humor and show off your Ne through text messages. Maybe you even want to just text her for several weeks before even hanging out. If she's an extrovert that is eager to hang out or if she's a J and wants a decision made, this might not work. But, this can actually work in your favor with certain types as it shows that you aren't in a huge rush - that you're patient.

Main thing is just be real. If she's pushing you through text messages to go out and you're not quite ready to hang out in person yet, just say something like, "If I wasn't such a slow mover, we would have already gone out. But, we will go out sometime, and it will be worth the wait. We'll do something really fun."

Just be straight up with her. Don't rush yourself and don't become someone you're not. In the meantime, do use your wit to make her laugh and get to know her at a comfortable pace.


INTPs can talk a LOT to girls who share their interests (string theory, interstellar travel, cryptozoology and the like).

LOL
 

Amphion

New member
Joined
Apr 4, 2010
Messages
82
MBTI Type
ENTP
You're fortunate! Far easier to be clever via text than on the phone for a Ti I would think! I agree with "be yorself" and if she likes you then great! I know it's the last thing on your mind but she's probably nervous too. After all, you may not like the "real her". Nothing ventured, nothing gained. Don't put so much pressure on yourself.
 
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