[NT] Don't get women at all

[yvonne]

this thread has been an interesting read

for me personally, i like someone who has his values about right... someone who is positive at the end of the day... someone with a sense of humor and conversational skills... someone who i find physically attractive... i think that's about it for me. it's attractive, if someone believes in themselves and knows themselves, but doesn't take themselves TOO seriously.

 

[Shimmy]

I may have posted in this thread before but I can't remember.


1,2 & 3.) They are not fascinated by assholes and they will not become bored if you show a 'human side'. You sound patronizing to women by even asking that question. Which is, quite obviously, you venting your frustrations, rather than a question you actually expect an answer for. With an attitude like that, you wouldn't understand what women are attracted to if, whatever it may be, hits you in the face with a shovel.


As for the couple of posts I did read, I guess my fellow typec dwellers have pretty much said the same thing in different words.

Now if you really want to learn something, go and create a new thread where you actually ask what women are attracted to rather then telling them they're all attracted to Jerks.

this thread has been an interesting read

for me personally, i like someone who has his values about right... someone who is positive at the end of the day... someone with a sense of humor and conversational skills... someone who i find physically attractive... i think that's about it for me. it's attractive, if someone believes in themselves and knows themselves, but doesn't take themselves TOO seriously.

How u doin'?

 

[figsfiggyfigs]

Who called you an asshole???

Games are pointless

guys who say they're "Nice" guys are not nice guys...

You're getting treated this way because you're not just being your self first off.

You're "pulling"

 

[Rainne]

The trick to women is to just be yourself. Women appreciate genuine people, they do not like being deceived. They get enough of that from other women. Just show your cards and what you have to offer.

There's bound to be a woman out there who like you for who you are.

 

[Fluffywolf]

The trick to women is to just be yourself. Women appreciate genuine people, they do not like being deceived. They get enough of that from other women. Just show your cards and what you have to offer.

There's bound to be a woman out there who like you for who you are.

And if your genuine self isn't appealing to women, then fake a cooler self. It'll work if you say "honestly" and "I'm not kidding!" regularly while faking. It will make it seem genuine.

 

[Juni]

It is all in your presentation.

If you "pull" for women (just trying to get them in bed) you don't respect them so don't expect them to respect you.

If you are looking for something real, you have to be real.

 

[kyuuei]

I don't think you get women because you're thinking of us as having a hive mind somehow. We don't.

I don't think you place yourself in the group of males the same way you place females together. You dont think "I am exactly like every single guy I have ever met Ever." to yourself, do you? You know that sure, there are a lot of guys that may act similar.. and you may even act like those guys at some point in time. But you do not classify yourself, as your entire identity, as those guys. You are you.

And +1 to the poster above me. How do you expect to attract a girl when you 'pull' at all?

 

[Aleksei]

The trick to women is to just be yourself. Women appreciate genuine people, they do not like being deceived. They get enough of that from other women. Just show your cards and what you have to offer.

Worst stock advice ever. What the hell is the point of being "yourself"? Yourself isn't getting laid. There is a valid point there in that you should be comfortable in your own skin and try not to lie, but being yourself just means being the nervous wreck you usually are.

 

[CrystalViolet]

Worst stock advice ever. What the hell is the point of being "yourself"? Yourself isn't getting laid. There is a valid point there in that you should be comfortable in your own skin and try not to lie, but being yourself just means being the nervous wreck you usually are.

Some women actually like nervous wrecks. It's actually quite appealing and more that a little flattering. Just as long as you aren't nervous when it counts, and by that I mean, when you need to speak up.

 

[Rainne]

Worst stock advice ever. What the hell is the point of being "yourself"? Yourself isn't getting laid. There is a valid point there in that you should be comfortable in your own skin and try not to lie, but being yourself just means being the nervous wreck you usually are.

Well, it basically means be yourself. I'm sure everyone has a codes and morals they live by and make their decisions accordingly.

If you're not getting laid, well, sucks to be you.

 

[yvonne]

to joey, but no, i don't find him that attractive.

is it tough to be a guy? i don't think i've ever thought this much about what's appealing to guys trying to be strategic. i just am myself, take it, or leave it

 

[Jeremy77]

We had a conversation about this on the INTJ forum that went a little better than the "OMG, he asserted a bad stereotype. Kill him!!!" mentality that I see here.

It was brought up that on some distant primal level of human evolution, women would be attracted to the alpha male as a security mechanism to help defend her and raise her children in a environment of scarce resources (with some of the INTJ females agreeing this was the ultimate psychological explanation). The argument then became how much this evolutionary drive is in operation today, and how much one can rise above it.

That aside .... personally, OP, I see and agree mostly with what you are getting at. Let the naysayers chide you for making politically incorrect observations, but we see the truth.

1.) Why is it that women will pretend to want a nice guy etc., but really are fascinated by you if you are an asshole, and will harrass you to show a "human" side, but then, soon get bored once you have shown it (or at least, if you don't turn it off very quickly).

2.) Leading on from that, why be annoyed by arrogance when this is what attracted you in the first place, and when there were plenty of non-arrogant guys who like you, who you could go for, but don't.

3.) Why demand the hypocrisy that someone be "ambitious" or an "alpha male" in more general terms, but that they not be an asshole, when clearly, the two can't be seprated (by definition, climbing above other people, means taking advantage of situations for your benefit at their expense, i.e., being an asshole)? So why do we have to play some game of denying assholery while at the very same time taking a shit on everyone else?

Actually those 3 questions are probably all the same, but whatever.

 

[Amethyst]

1.) There's a fine line between being the nice-guy and the pushover, the same goes for being an asshole and brutal honesty (to some). In a biological explanation, women want the protector/warrior types, but also want a compassionate man to take care of her and offspring. They kind of contradict, no? It hasn't gone away.

2.) Even as a girl, I don't even understand this in others, especially friends. It could be because there are a lot of people who assume that a guy's outward 'arrogant' behavior is entirely different when they're with the same guy in private, but mostly that's not the case. There's a lot of reasons for this I suppose. One gender can be completely oblivious to the opposite's negative aspects, thus leading many people of the opposite's gender to question 'how in the hell did they get a date?'.

3.) I wouldn't compare 'ambition' to be anything near being an asshole. It can be, depending on what someone is 'ambitious' about, but I don't see it as taking advantage over others. And pretty much everyone does this. People always deny doing bad things, but at the same time are doing them. Some girls deny being a bitch, when it is blatantly obvious that they are climbing a social/academic ladder.

In a simple generalized answer, though, many girls are just dumb, not all, but many. I wouldn't say that all girls are the 'real life women' that you are confused about though. There are a lot of brilliant single girls out there who see guys for who they are, too.

 

[King sns]

Oh no!! Not this topic again! (Runs far away)

 

[neptunesnet]

I hate when people replace "politically incorrect" for "misogynistic" or "racist." I mean, I get that it's hip to be PIC now, but geeeeez.

 

[Arthur Schopenhauer]

YouTube - Cooldude

Story of my life.

 

[Epiphany]

YouTube - Adam and Eve in the Friend Zone

 

[DiscoBiscuit]

You just gotta wait for the right one.

The hard part is knowing it when you see it, and pursuing it before it's gone.

 

[DanceLikeAdam]

It's true that you can't group all women together, but stereotypically, yes, that's how women act. The ones that don't probably are too quiet to catch your eye anyway.

Guys just need to come out and say what they're feeling to avoid all that alpha-male garbage.

 

[copperfish17]

Nah, your stereotypical women ARE attracted to (who they think are) good guys.

I have NO IDEA why, but... many women believe that bad guys in reality possess this mushy core they hide from everyone else. Those women fantasize about becoming the one person those bad guys open up and act sweet towards.

When those women realize that the bad guys do NOT actually possess the chewy center they thought those guys secretly had inside... things get ugly. VERY UGLY.

Am I getting a point across?