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[MBTI General] ENTP:ENFP dating (Bad idea)

Nigel Tufnel

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Joined
Nov 30, 2008
Messages
116
MBTI Type
ENTP
Ironically, the ENTP could see the ENFP as selfish and not truly concerned about others.
Fe has a person focus on how to make others happy and Fi has a person focus on how to make him/herself happy.

Think you're onto something here. In spite of being friendly to a fault, and not having any hint of being fake, the ENFP girls I've dated have been selfish in their needs. I felt like I was doing a lot of giving and getting little back.

Starting to see why xNFJs are often considered the best pairing for an ENTP. I've never paired well with introverts of any type because I like to stay out late if I'm having fun, so maybe ENFJ is the answer.
 

Qre:us

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Nov 21, 2008
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4,890
I find that my ENFP partner gets tired of our ENTP girlfriend and needs her space away from her sometimes. Maybe it's too many similar traits and extraversion in one room (like testosterone). Unfortunately, this isn't longterm, so the "newness" hasn't worn off.
She doesn't do the same with me (INTJ). We never seem to get tired or bored of one another. But, we do take mutual breaks to ensure our personal needs are taken care of (for me: reading, meditating, writing), so perhaps this helps?

I just know that our ENTP can be a bit clingy/smothering, and needs lots of extra care, while we (INTJ/ENFP) just seem to naturally fit like pieces of a jigsaw puzzle. Interlocking, not overlapping.

Maybe because she feels like an outsider to you and your ENFP's already strongly bonded pair, as she's the later addition - trying to find how she really fits in to the whole thing? 2+1, rather than 3.

I think it has less to do with type, or individual, and more to do with the dynamics of your relationship that spurs such behaviour in her.
 

sculpting

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Jan 28, 2009
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4,148
ok, dog.
what about ENTP and INFP?

woof it, mutt.

I dunno. I know tons of ENTPs, few INFPs. I'd say it wouldnt be real productive long term, but I wouldnt expect it to get started honestly. However with no tert Te bitch slaps, if started it might last a bit longer and not involve any mutilation.

Do not fear, I is here. ;)

Mom said stay away naughty boy.

I know, but it's really freaky how significant that little E can be, apparently.

Ne dominant is the first problem. We seek affirmation of our Ti/Fi from each other. Except we dont fucking understand the other one at all. OMT, Ti really does speak a different language.

The tert is where all hell breaks loose. Tert Fe withdraws when Fi seeks affirmations provoking pain of rejection which provokes a tert Te attacking which just enhances the Fe withdraw. An endless cycle, muhhahahahahaha!

Happy Puppy, the image of ENFPs poking holes through ENTPs was :yim_rolling_on_the_ and I realized I really don't know any (confirmed) ENTPs irl or have enough rl experience with them because I couldn't relate or understand what you outlined in your OP. Sounds tragic!

Honestly, I don't even really want to ask more because I hate thinking anything I read on the forum will color my perception and even alter the way I interact with people irl. There's already friction on the board between some ENFPs and some ENTPs so when I actually do meet a person I think is ENTP irl I wouldn't want to act all strange thinking "Ohnoz! Abort!" even before a chance to really say helllo. I have no problem forming preconceived ideas and biases and red flags and applying them to people irl, but I like to base those preconceived notions on personal experience ;)

But maybe 6 months from now I'll be cycling through your thread (and the others another member posted links to) going "hmmmm, uncanny!" Hopefully not, though!

Czecze, I find as I age the diff grows much more significant. ENTP boys-the 20s will still try and engage. By 40s, the boys have smartened up. ENTP men dont get Fi, but eventually figure out what it looks like on the surface and will avoid those chicks they dated in their twenties. Even in a business/professional setting. ENTP women can pull off Fe much more smoothly. They tag team it with Ti very effectively, so you see clever, sort of mothering Fe behavior and good working relationships.

ENTP guys care more and more about other's perceptions as they age.
ENFP women care less and less and are willing to be highly dominating and direct as need be.

Anyways this may be the worst combo ever. I should add a poll.

I do heart my entps though!!!
 

CzeCze

RETIRED
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Sep 11, 2007
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GONE
Czecze, I find as I age the diff grows much more significant. ...

ENFP women care less and less and are willing to be highly dominating and direct as need be.

But... I like that! :yes:

It's something I can look forward to every day! :laugh:
 

pyramid

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Joined
Feb 21, 2010
Messages
101
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
9w1
ENFP woman here was engaged to an ENTP man........ gah! miserable! he was so romantic, but soulless! another relationship where I just end up making the other party see their inner rageoholic and they thank me for this but then we need to get the fuck away from each other. He was showering me with $$$ and I was feeding his need for :heart: and in the end we have nothing in common besides loud, thrilling adventure.

He belongs in the corporate world and I only want to be near that to destroy it.
 

Emectar

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May 17, 2010
Messages
149
MBTI Type
ENFP
I had a total death spiral with an ENTP. I thought i had got over it but i really haven't.

I know its not the case and its only through our melodramatic minds, but ENTPS' really seem soulless. Like outright evil.
 

entropie

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Apr 24, 2008
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entp
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783
I had a total death spiral with an ENTP. I thought i had got over it but i really haven't.

I know its not the case and its only through our melodramatic minds, but ENTPS' really seem soulless. Like outright evil.

You have a shoulder to lean on in me every time. I am helping an infp to get over her past relationship next week on thursday and on tuesday I am masquerading as a woman in the anonymous IFJ male hater circle.

If you want we can meet wednesday ? :)
 

sculpting

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Jan 28, 2009
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I had a total death spiral with an ENTP. I thought i had got over it but i really haven't.

I know its not the case and its only through our melodramatic minds, but ENTPS' really seem soulless. Like outright evil.

nah, that isnt true at all. They just speak Fe which is a different language altogether. ENTPs can care very deeply for others-oddly especially for others and appear much more obvious in that caring than an enfp.

Fe and Fi are both very caring and neither is selfish or evil-they both play important roles in building a highly empathic social structure where we care for others around us. The way they do it differs so greatly-the words, gestures, interpersonal interactions-that miscommunication results. But yeah, this pairing is not the best idea as both tend to use Ne to amplify issues.

I have seen several good INTJ-INFJ pairs though.
 

Emectar

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Joined
May 17, 2010
Messages
149
MBTI Type
ENFP
You have a shoulder to lean on in me every time. I am helping an infp to get over her past relationship next week on thursday and on tuesday I am masquerading as a woman in the anonymous IFJ male hater circle.

If you want we can meet wednesday ? :)

haha thats alright, i appreciate it though
 

Waffle

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Dec 4, 2009
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76
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ENFP
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2
I'm not sure whether to be ashamed or not at the fact that the ENFP +INTJ thread was mine.
Sadly though, that did get out of hand. I said that I had just met a bad INTJ at like page 12. I can't believe it continued.
 

Waffle

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Dec 4, 2009
Messages
76
MBTI Type
ENFP
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2
Also, ENTP + ENFP = Bad idea. We think on the same wavelength and can make tremendous partners for business or inventing, but a deeper relationship is terrible.
 

ZiL

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Nov 27, 2007
Messages
511
MBTI Type
ENTP
Enneagram
567?
Eh, not my experience. Depends on the people. Der.
 
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