Well, I can certainly understand that. I hate feeling like I've said or done something that wasn't bright. But why should an NT feel like an idiot because their mate could possibly be smarter than them? That sounds like a competition to me, and that I don't understand. Why would you compete with a loved one? I would want to share my space, not be supreme ruler of it.
The way I've always understood it, and the way it most strongly manifests with myself, is that while yes, it is competition, it isn't competition as most people think of it. It's a sense of internal perfection that we are always seeking. By being put into a situation where we look like an idiot, we're suddenly in a position of failure. I suspect some can take it and grow from it, and others tend to flee from it. Probably depends, greatly, on the individual.
Basically, we're always competing with ourselves. The fact that you're a loved one.. doesn't seem to actually factor into the equation, anywhere. Think of it like a sprinter, who's trying to beat his own record at the 100m dash. If he goes to the olympics, and finds himself far slower than the other runners, he suddenly feels terribly inferior. So he tends to keep around people that are marginally faster, or patently slower, to help soothe his ego and give him a challenge.
So, yes. I suspect NTs are generally threatened by partners that are substantially more intelligent than they, I'm not sure they aren't looking for intelligent women however. Does that help at all?
