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[NT] Ways to frustrate an NT!

visaisahero

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Nov 13, 2009
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557
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ENTP
My "simple logic FAIL" topic is still lingering around, so I figured I'd like to ask you guys what ELSE frustrates you?

1. It frustrates me when friends respond to text messages with the shortest possible responses that barely say anything, which results ultimately in several more messages of unnecessary probing.

If I were messaged, "What are you doing tonight?" I would respond either "I don't really have any plans, What do you have in mind?" or "I'm afraid I'm going to be working late tonight... maybe we could do supper afterwards if you're keen?", or "I'm really tired and exhausted, I think I'm just going to go to bed. Sorry man =\"

If I were to message my ESFP friend "What are you doing tonight? Wanna hang out?" he would reply "dunno maybe" or "k". It's practically redundant and doesn't say anything. Irks me! (And he's not trying to avoid me or anything- he's a good friend and is usually the one who wants to hang out!)
 

tcda

psicobolche
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Well my friend today does what she always does: sat next to me when I was doing work and concentrating hard, and started asking me "Why" questions: i.e. "WHY did she say that!?" "WHY do we have to do it like that!?" "WHY did the deadline get changed from 2pm to 11am!?" (in an email which we both got at the same time). In other words asking me to answer questions I couldn't possibly know the answer for, and at the same asking for the "reasons" behind plain facts.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not a fatalist, I do question the world, but there has to be some coherent alternative. If you're asking me "why did the deadline just get mvoed from the afternoon to the morning, it's so unfair!?", I think, well, Dresden got firebombed, Hiroshima got nuked, and Haiti got razed by an earthquake, why shouldn't the deadline have moved from 2pm to 11am FFS. If you are able to make the deadline change back to 2pm then great, I might even help if you can tell me how, but but don't keep asking me why!:laugh:
 

visaisahero

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^I feel your pain! I get frustrated with "Why?!" questions too because those are questions that you can usually answer yourselves if you take the time and effort, and often the answer doesn't actually matter.

The deadline moved; there must have been a good reason for it. Even if there wasn't, it's not going to change anything. What matters is what you're going to do about it, so why harp on what doesn't matter when there's something more important to do?

Sigh. :)
 

thisGuy

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Well my friend today does what she always does: sat next to me when I was doing work and concentrating hard, and started asking me "Why" questions: i.e. "WHY did she say that!?" "WHY do we have to do it like that!?" "WHY did the deadline get changed from 2pm to 11am!?" (in an email which we both got at the same time). In other words asking me to answer questions I couldn't possibly know the answer for, and at the same asking for the "reasons" behind plain facts.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not a fatalist, I do question the world, but there has to be some coherent alternative. If you're asking me "why did the deadline just get mvoed from the afternoon to the morning, it's so unfair!?", I think, well, Dresden got firebombed, Hiroshima got nuked, and Haiti got razed by an earthquake, why shouldn't the deadline have moved from 2pm to 11am FFS. If you are able to make the deadline change back to 2pm then great, I might even help if you can tell me how, but but don't keep asking me why!:laugh:

hahahaah lol
 

Totenkindly

@.~*virinaĉo*~.@
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Yup, like has already been said:

1. Non-informative answers, requiring me to pry over and OVER again, whereas I try to at least always give enough for someone to go on.

2. People who want to know answers to questions that have no real answer and just need to be taken at face value.

3. People who create drama where no drama needed to be.

4. People who force others to accommodate arbitrary deadlines and/or constraints. Bonus Annoyance: When such deadlines/constraints are actually counterproductive. Bonus BONUS Annoyance: People who label others as immoral, incompetent, etc., when they cannot meet the counterproductive, arbitrary restraints.

5. People who insist on remaining ignorant (even if it shoots them in the foot) rather than willing to at least examine intelligently other views, ideas, and methods.

6. Whiners who expect others to coddle them or solve their problems FOR them or give them all the answers. Bonus Annoyance: When there are no answers and they still demand them.
 

Bri

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Way's to annoy this specific NT:

Never (ever ever) ask me this question:
"What're you thinking right now?"
Because you'll never (ever ever) get a truthful answer even though I hate lying. (This is probably more of an introvert thing than an NT thing.)

Don't tell me all about your problem if you don't want me to ponder ways to solve it. I'm simply not the 'go-to' person for sympathy/empathy, and you'll just be disappointed.
 

yenom

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4. People who force others to accommodate arbitrary deadlines and/or constraints. Bonus Annoyance: When such deadlines/constraints are actually counterproductive. Bonus BONUS Annoyance: People who label others as immoral, incompetent, etc., when they cannot meet the counterproductive, arbitrary restraints.

I think that is a P thing rather than NT. Yea, I hate people who won't let me work at my own pace and force deadlines on me.
 

Night

Boring old fossil
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I think that is a P thing rather than NT. Yea, I hate people who won't let me work at my own pace and force deadlines on me.

Not so sure.

Like you and Jennifer, arbitrary deadlines (especially when set in opposition to the ultimate, shared goal) frustrate progress. And, depending on context, not just frustrate progress: trainwreck it.

I don't even think it's necessarily an N v. S breakdown. More of a type-independent desire to micromanage outcome, irrespective of cost.
 

JocktheMotie

Habitual Fi LineStepper
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Take everything I say extremely personally, or infer emotionality from my behavior when there is none.
 

Totenkindly

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I think that is a P thing rather than NT. Yea, I hate people who won't let me work at my own pace and force deadlines on me.

Explanation: I think the keyword for me is "arbitrary."

NTs to me seem better at having relevant deadlines, S's seem to have deadlines just to have deadlines (from my perspective) and can't see that sometimes the deadlines can easily be moved to accommodate task needs and improve final outcome.
 

pockets

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Way's to annoy this specific NT:

Never (ever ever) ask me this question:
"What're you thinking right now?"
Because you'll never (ever ever) get a truthful answer even though I hate lying. (This is probably more of an introvert thing than an NT thing.)

Don't tell me all about your problem if you don't want me to ponder ways to solve it. I'm simply not the 'go-to' person for sympathy/empathy, and you'll just be disappointed.

this seems like an I thing rather than an NT thing. i know one ENTP who likes asking just that question, at the most surprising moments when I'm all SP-in the moment.
 

JustHer

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^I feel your pain! I get frustrated with "Why?!" questions too because those are questions that you can usually answer yourselves if you take the time and effort, and often the answer doesn't actually matter.

The deadline moved; there must have been a good reason for it. Even if there wasn't, it's not going to change anything. What matters is what you're going to do about it, so why harp on what doesn't matter when there's something more important to do?

Sigh. :)

This could just be thinking out loud. Are you sure this person even wants an actual answer? Maybe they are just reacting externally to a sudden event...
 

runvardh

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This could just be thinking out loud. Are you sure this person even wants an actual answer? Maybe they are just reacting externally to a sudden event...

Reacting externally... yeah, it does make it hard to tell whether I should be listening or not. If I listen I get filled up with the needed and the trash; if I don't listen I get whined at for it. I don't think its an NT specific frustration...
 

JustHer

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Reacting externally... yeah, it does make it hard to tell whether I should be listening or not. If I listen I get filled up with the needed and the trash; if I don't listen I get whined at for it. I don't think its an NT specific frustration...

Yeah I think that practically nothing in this thread is NT specific.
 

tcda

psicobolche
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This could just be thinking out loud. Are you sure this person even wants an actual answer? Maybe they are just reacting externally to a sudden event...

No, she really wanted me to give her the answer.
 

Grungemouse

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Ask me to repeat what I just said. The phrase, "Say that again?" Or playing the "Copying game", where someone mirrors your exact mannerisms and actions.

Not sure if these are type-specific, but they are guaranteed to send me homocidal. The former might be INTP-ish, if talking really fast is a particular characteristic?
 

miss fortune

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invading my personal orb of space will always really frustrate me... don't look over my shoulder while I'm doing something, I can feel you breathing back there! :steam:

strangers hugging me is creepy

making me hold a baby and expecting me to be cuddly to it or something

making me wait somewhere with nothing to read...

yeah, a lot of things, I can be pretty cranky :doh:
 

teslashock

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People I barely know talking to me about their personal problems is kind of awkward for me. And then when they don't interpret my anxious twitches as a sign for them to stop, I start to get frustrated. What am I supposed to do in that kind of situation anyway?

I also get frustrated (mildly, and in a light-hearted way) when I make a joke or humorous remark, and the receiver doesn't acknowledge me for it (even when they think it's funny, arg!).

I also get frustrated when people don't understand what I'm saying, even after I feel like I've laid it out in the clearest terms possible.
 

fill

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I love technology- but there are times I want to smash my laptop over the desk.

When people somehow think since they consider me a "friend," I'm bound to do everything they're doing. More clearly: when people expect me to stay with them the entire day- I'll start looking out the window like an animal that needs out.
 
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