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[NT] betas

murkrow

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A girl I know called a friend of mine my beta.

It was crushing and I've decided the only way to continue is to ignore it.

Is there any situation where being identified as a beta male isn't insulting?
 

Miserable

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What is a beta? I think I've heard it before, but I don't remember what it is exactly.

Is that like, an incomplete person? Or a shallow, or maybe an immature person?

I think that would be pretty insulting, it would make me question myself, I don't think I would be unable to ignore, no matter how secure I am.
 

murkrow

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Beta is a power structure position

Like...

Sidekick, yesman...



it corresponds to alpha which is the top position
 

Eruca

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The entire idea of alphas and betas is an oversimplification.

I find it laughable that someone would count themselves an "alpha".
 

Miserable

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I remembered after I saw "alpha". :)


I would naturally ignore something like that. For a couple reasons....
 

tinkerbell

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Alpha Males are really not all that, beta isn't an insult at all, it's liknd of lik saying you not an asshole
 

Shimmy

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Let's put it this way, if your friend felt affected by this comment then he truly is a Beta.

An alpha male doesn't care about other peoples opinions.
 

simulatedworld

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Let's put it this way, if your friend felt affected by this comment then he truly is a Beta.

An alpha male doesn't care about other peoples opinions.

I imagine alpha males must have some serious difficulty with social integration, then.
 

Mad Hatter

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Beta as in what? Socionics? Brave New World? Greek alphabet?

How can you be offended if you don't even know what the offense is supposed to mean or whether it is even meant to be an offense?
 

simulatedworld

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Beta as in what? Socionics? Brave New World? Greek alphabet?

How can you be offended if you don't even know what the offense is supposed to mean or whether it is even meant to be an offense?

I think people should pay more attention to your posts. +1
 

Shimmy

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I imagine alpha males must have some serious difficulty with social integration, then.

Not necessarily. Not caring about other people's opinions is something entirely different from disregarding other people's words.
 

Silencio

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I think people should pay more attention to your posts. +1

Not necessarily considering I think the O.P is refering to 'beta' as the way it's primarily used in our society these days. To call a man a 'beta' usually implies that they are less capable of achieving and also lack 'manly courage'. By manly courage I ofcours mean the whole idea that a man will ''protect his female'' and be able to hold his own with the toughest. Seeing as most men think women view being protected as a huge part of what makes a man desirable (and to a fair number of women it probably is), being called a 'beta' makes the man feel less desirable to women.

EDIT: I probably shouldn't have said ''these days'' when I talked about the idea of Alpha-Beta, it seems to be something that has always been a part of human nature.
 

simulatedworld

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Not necessarily considering I think the O.P is refering to 'beta' as the way it's primarily used in our society these days. To call a man a 'beta' usually implies that they are less capable of achieving and also lack 'manly courage'. By manly courage I ofcours mean the whole idea that a man will ''protect his female'' and be able to hold his own with the toughest. Seeing as most men think women view being protected as a huge part of what makes a man desirable (and to a fair number of women it probably is), being called a 'beta' makes the man feel less desirable to women.

EDIT: I probably shouldn't have said ''these days'' when I talked about the idea of Alpha-Beta, it seems to be something that has always been a part of human nature.

Umm, I'd say "these days" the traditional "omg I am tough and manly and never show emotion and can kick anyone's ass to protect my weak fragile woman" thing is on the way out, if anything.

With women assuming a more equal place in society, such behavior seems antiquated and out of touch with the times. Many women I know would be annoyed by the implication that they require a man's protection or guidance.

Men "these days" are expected to be much more emotionally mature and nuanced than they were in the past. Just being tough and physically dominant in an Se way doesn't really work as much as it used to, so the definition of "alpha male" is definitely changing.

An "alpha male" is probably just any male that is able to succeed and attract females. But the kind of man that can do this changes from generation to generation, so I'd say it's kind of a mistake to label any particular type of male behavior "alpha" or "beta", since this is totally dependent upon the current environment and external conditions.


Not necessarily. Not caring about other people's opinions is something entirely different from disregarding other people's words.

Right, but if you completely ignore everything everyone else thinks about you, it makes social integration pretty tough. I can tell you that from experience.
 

Mad Hatter

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Not necessarily considering I think the O.P is refering to 'beta' as the way it's primarily used in our society these days.

Again, that presupposes that it's common knowledge, which I think it isn't.

A girl I know called a friend of mine my beta.

The "my" is really odd. (Emphasis MyNe.)
 

Silencio

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Umm, I'd say "these days" the traditional "omg I am tough and manly and never show emotion and can kick anyone's ass to protect my weak fragile woman" thing is on the way out, if anything.

With women assuming a more equal place in society, such behavior seems antiquated and out of touch with the times. Many women I know would be annoyed by the implication that they require a man's protection or guidance.

Men "these days" are expected to be much more emotionally mature and nuanced than they were in the past. Just being tough and physically dominant in an Se way doesn't really work as much as it used to, so the definition of "alpha male" is definitely changing.

An "alpha male" is probably just any male that is able to succeed and attract females. But the kind of man that can do this changes from generation to generation, so I'd say it's kind of a mistake to label any particular type of male behavior "alpha" or "beta", since this is totally dependent upon the current environment and external conditions.




Right, but if you completely ignore everything everyone else thinks about you, it makes social integration pretty tough. I can tell you that from experience.

Well yeah, you're right. I suppose a more truthful explaination would be to say that the 'alpha' would be someone who is easily percieved as capable of being 'the best' (or atleast in the same realm as 'the best') in any given field that is seen in high regard by society. They are also confident and have a ''well rounded'' (emotionally stable etc.) demeanor. To call someone a 'beta' may then imply that they aren't capable of achieving ''greatness'' or that they are less able to achieve, period (although they may be just as capable, they may have certain flaws that prevent them from being seen that way. These flaws may also prevent someone from being able to fully actualize their potential). Some people hold the qualities I mentioned earlier and are also capable of making them evident to a large group of people,therefore, they are percieved as 'Alpha'... just a thought.

Edit: I suppose they wouldn't need to be ''well rounded'' because being liked isn't necessarily a part of being Alpha. Also, when I say 'the best' I certainly don't mean they have to be seen as 'in tight competition' with Tiger Woods or anything, I mean it in more of the 'percieved as excellent' way.
 

Timeless

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A girl I know called a friend of mine my beta.

It was crushing and I've decided the only way to continue is to ignore it.

Is there any situation where being identified as a beta male isn't insulting?
Yeah:

Beta testing.

:)
 

Shimmy

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Right, but if you completely ignore everything everyone else thinks about you, it makes social integration pretty tough. I can tell you that from experience.

You don't ignore other people's opinions, but you just do not feel devaluated because of it. In your own mind, people can give you advice, but there's absolutely nothing to criticize you for.
 

murkrow

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Again, that presupposes that it's common knowledge, which I think it isn't.



The "my" is really odd. (Emphasis MyNe.)

Considering most people understood my meaning, it probably is common knowledge.

The my is odd? (you've lost me with MyNe, whatever you're referring to is probably not common knowledge)
 
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