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[NT] Sex: How to explain a child...

Maha Raj

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Nov 13, 2007
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I had sex with my girlfriend few times, i was 8. But after I saw my girldfriend (10) with another guy...

I asked an elder cousin of mine.

he told me... sex is something that older people do after they get married... and you know i never had sex until i turned 20... now i am 24 but still i only did it few times with my girl friends whom I was gonna marry...

Not all the kids, go and ask someone about things like that... so i think parents or brothers or sisters should explain a child...

How, i don't know i leave it to u guys to provide a better way...
 

Maha Raj

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Why should we explain...

I saw this...

Uberfuher's signature says "AN INTELLECTUAL IS SOMEONE WHO HAS FOUND SOMETHING MORE INTERESTING THAN SEX." --Aldous Huxley

this explains why...
 

Totenkindly

@.~*virinaĉo*~.@
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We waited until each one of our children got to the stage where they started asking questions like, "Where do babies come from?" and such things. (And they did, all on their own.)

We gave them a very general explanation and slowly grew more specific when they seemed to need more answers to work through.... and each one of them told us when we needed to stop giving information so they could work through things.

They come back when they want to know more.

We do not have a "closed door" policy on topics. Nothing's really taboo to discuss at our house, if someone honestly wants to or needs to know. It's more a matter of not giving the child more than they were asking for.
 

Maha Raj

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Maha Raj
Don't you think that children who don't know anything about sex have more chances to be abused by a child molester...

Kiddo Respoded saying:
I don't think that makes a terrible amount of difference. Children up until a certain age won't be able to fully understand sex no matter how much they have been told about it. Child molesters will also usually use tactics of coercion, shame, or force to get what they want. So a child could understand sex very well and still be exploited by a molester. I believe what parents really should do is warn children about dangerous people and what to do if they are approached by one. You know, the whole "Good touch, Bad touch" thing.


Quote:
If they know it is wrong until they get married... they would run away from child molesters or tell their parents or others about the "wrong" act the child molester tried to do..?

Kiddo Respoded saying:
For the record, I don't think there is anything "wrong" with children sexually experimenting with one another. And I certainly don't think children should be educated that sex is "wrong". That could cause a whole mess of problems for a kid down the road. They should be told what they need to know to protect themselves.
 

Maha Raj

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Kiddo
I don't think that makes a terrible amount of difference. Children up until a certain age won't be able to fully understand sex no matter how much they have been told about it. Child molesters will also usually use tactics of coercion, shame, or force to get what they want. So a child could understand sex very well and still be exploited by a molester. I believe what parents really should do is warn children about dangerous people and what to do if they are approached by one. You know, the whole "Good touch, Bad touch" thing.

Jennifer responded saying:

I agree with that much.

Kids just will not understand sex... or the significance of sex. And they are just children; they are malleable, no matter how smart they are.

The best thing to do is offer practical strategy. Don't base their survival on their powers of discernment per se, at that age; give them hard and fast rules that they should not break, not until they are more able to defend themselves. As they mature, they can take more responsibility for how to respond themselves to a particular situation.



Quote: by Kiddo
For the record, I don't think there is anything "wrong" with children sexually experimenting with one another. And I certainly don't think children should be educated that sex is "wrong". That could cause a whole mess of problems for a kid down the road.

Jennifer responded saying:
The negative aura developed around sex has definitely caused issues in people. Sex is a good thing; it's mostly a matter of context.

And kids will generally experiment at least with looking at things. They're curious about their bodies. If the parents do not answer their questions, they'll find their own.
 
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