[INTJ] The (often-misunderstood) INTJ Idea Of Romance, with examples and illustrations.

[runvardh]

Kissing has nothing to do with being able to get the sloppy words out.

I know that; but I under now... How would you react if the sloppy words garnered a kiss while you tried to change the subject?

 

[Amargith]

Mine determined first that I loved him. That way he had no stress about admitting he loved me to. For that matter..it took him a month to have it sink in and catch up with me..he always was a little slower in realizing his feelings

 

[01011010]

Yeah, no. I like to do things that help people out.

I also suck at gift giving. I like the idea of it, but mostly fail at thinking of gift ideas for more than five minutes at a time. I like for people to just tell me what they want.

Helping is a way to show you care, without saying it. I've had my friends give me gift lists for years now. It's not a surprise, but I'm not wasting my money and they get exactly what they want. Win/Win.

INTJ Romance:

*stares at floor*
*serious, embarrassed face*
*quiet voice, flat affect*
*inappropriate timing*

"I...uhhh...like...you. A lot. Ok??"

lol This is why it's best not to verbally express feelings. That's mistake number one for INTJs.



OP: I had a star named after my ex gf. While she bought me some really great gifts like a psp, the best gift she ever gave, was me drawn as a superhero cartoon.

 

[Uytuun]

I had a star named after my ex gf.

 

[Cranky]

I know that; but I under now... How would you react if the sloppy words garnered a kiss while you tried to change the subject?

I wish.

 

[Liminality]

lol This is why it's best not to verbally express feelings. That's mistake number one for INTJs.

It's so adorable though. Unless you're confessing to an intimacy phobe.

 

[runvardh]

I wish.

I know I have a hard time not doing that if I feel the same, especialy if it's done the way you described. Shit like that pulls my heart strings in ways difficult to handle...

 

[Cranky]

It's so adorable though. Unless you're confessing to an intimacy phobe.

You'd think so. Unless you're us, and feeling completely ILL at the notion of having to get that out of your face.

We're not feeling adorable when confessing to feelings (especially if we're unsure about whether they're returned). We have a churning stomach, a headache, vertigo, a pounding heart, and our feet are probably numb.

It is NOT pleasant.

 

[Amargith]

You'd think so. Unless you're us, and feeling completely ILL at the notion of having to get that out of your face.

We're not feeling adorable when confessing to feelings (especially if we're unsure about whether they're returned). We have a churning stomach, a headache, vertigo, a pounding heart, and our feet are probably numb.

It is NOT pleasant.

We feel the same when we're frustrated at some task we just can't seem to get a handle on, and frustration gets the better of us. You still cannot help yourself but find us adorable and smile though. So you get no say in this

 

[BlackCat]

I am frustrated because I have said repeatedly I don't want this. I don't want to be the one to cause this train wreck. You keep escalating it.

Are you a troll or something?

You pull this in every thread you post in, and you never say what exactly your problem is.

 

[ceecee]

You'd think so. Unless you're us, and feeling completely ILL at the notion of having to get that out of your face.

We're not feeling adorable when confessing to feelings (especially if we're unsure about whether they're returned). We have a churning stomach, a headache, vertigo, a pounding heart, and our feet are probably numb.

It is NOT pleasant.

No it's not but with the right person you don't have to tell them anything. They already know how you feel and they know you're on the verge of barfing. Soooo....they tell you they love you and adore you and know that you feel the same way...in the bathroom. True story.

 

[runvardh]

You'd think so. Unless you're us, and feeling completely ILL at the notion of having to get that out of your face.

We're not feeling adorable when confessing to feelings (especially if we're unsure about whether they're returned). We have a churning stomach, a headache, vertigo, a pounding heart, and our feet are probably numb.

It is NOT pleasant.

So being ready to catch you would also be a good idea...

 

[ceecee]

I won't be the one to cause this train wreck. I will be the excuse. I could not have said more clearly, I DON'T WANT THIS!!!

Hey, nutter? We heard you the first time.

 

[Cranky]

I won't be the one to cause this train wreck. I will be the excuse. I could not have said more clearly, I DON'T WANT THIS!!!

What are you talking about?

*ducks head for fear of encouraging the trolls*

 

[Blank]

It's funny, I thought as an INTP the easiest way to avoid a situation was to detach from it.

 

[MiasmaResonance]

Last time we went out for dinner, I offered to share the bill, and he replied: "I'd rather like a blow job." Does that count?

Haha!

 

[Frank]

It sounds really robotic but the most effective way I have found to be "romantic" is to make a list of things that really matter to her and to go through them one by one and try and help her with or give them to her. Its how I show I care.

 

[Cranky]

It sounds really robotic but the most effective way I have found to be "romantic" is to make a list of things that really matter to her and to go through them one by one and try and help her with or give them to her. Its how I show I care.

That makes absolutely perfect sense to me. And it sounds very romantic!

I give it three 's.

 

[the state i am in]

intjs, do you WANT to be forced to express yourself (and thereby feel the intense excitement of having to TRY to communicate your feelings and have them spill out and make you want to throw up from nerves) or do you prefer someone who just gets them without articulation?

expression is very very important to me. as an Fe user it makes things more real. it doesn't have to be direct, but it has to come from the space of feeling for it to be feeling. at times it is difficult to recognize the acts of service when they are so in the language of Te and Fi has been but the first premise of a long geometrical proof.

at times with my intj, i think we struggle with my need for expression and her need for implicit let's move on action-oriented understanding. when i use Ti better, most problems in this regard dissipate, bc i can balance linear thinking to understand the TRACK of her actions as a form of expression rather than solely focusing on the style, voice, holism of the way we RELATE (thru expressions and articulations of self).

 

[ez78705]

What are some of the romantic things you've done for your partners, or if your partner was the INTJ, what did they do for you?

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