[NT] an NT in love....

[jenocyde]

I know what you mean about the ENFJs. I always felt a little off with them, but I have a lot of ENFJ friends. I'm drawn in, but not, with NFJs in general.

I've often wondered about INTP/INFP dynamics. The male INFPs can come off as INTPs much more so than the extrovert pairing of the same tempermants... Well, keep me posted!

Well, of course; if both of his legs are broken, you know exactly where he is. (Well, and with that feeding machine attached.)

Ahh..... NT wubbies -- how romantic!

Yes, that lady from Misery really was on to something...

 

[Totenkindly]

I know what you mean about the ENFJs. I always felt a little off with them, but I have a lot of ENFJ friends. I'm drawn in, but not, with NFJs in general.

I've often wondered about INTP/INFP dynamics. The male INFPs can come off as INTPs much more so than the extrovert pairing of the same tempermants... Well, keep me posted!

The only issues seem to really be the occasional bout of apologizing for something that didn't offend me or over-justifying a preference (out of courtesy for me) that I had already accepted on grounds of "fairness," lol.

... and... I don't tend to initiate contact quite as much, so occasionally I get asked if he did something wrong.

But those aren't bad things. I think it's good for a relationship to be able to initiate exchanges like that, so as long as it happens, it's good.

I think it's really about well-roundedness. Lopsided INxPs can drive me crazy, balanced ones of either type, I like being with.

Yes, that lady from Misery really was on to something...

In the book, she used an axe!

 

[Salt n' pepper]

You know do you think that NT are just too content (sometime for the own good), with their own company/projects etc... to the point they deny needing relationships and deny themselves of that type of growth opportunity?

Yes. It's serious business bringing someone into your, otherwise perfect little existence, that you created for yourself and your happy lying in that bed. Alone. Most of the time. Life is great! And when somebody's about to interrupt that space, they need to be put through the test of fire. Can they stand the heat? Are they worth it? Otherwise, get out of my kitchen. It's important, cause if I like what I see, I will most likely make him a part of my system. I don't like it, but that's the truth. But there are times when I skip the first part, and bring them in right away. Well, one time that happened. Somehow he impressed the hell out of me.

I need relationships. I need partnership. I need companionship. But I don't see that I need romantic relationships or romantic love. I function very well without it. I'm complete, without it. Romantic relationships are nice, at first. But usually, I'm just waiting for the novelty to wear off so we can get down to business.

 

[nucleaReligion]

I think it's less of creating impossible criteria and more of weighing how much you are willing to put up with, especially if you are absolutely fine with the way your life is to begin with. I see some people sacrifice so much of themselves to be in a relationship, due to a desperate fear of being alone. I have no such fear, so I don't feel the need to make compromises that I am not comfortable with. It's only when the benefits outweigh the annoyances do I even consider it. And even still, the annoyances have to minor...

Amen..

I got out of a relationship a few weeks ago, and needless to say, my image is somewhat skewed (because I'm dating again). But we will see.

To answer the original question, I don't like to get in relationships because the partner and I have never really worked out. It is much easier to be by myself or date around with no attachment then it is to get serious with someone and them have to put up with my "quirks," if you want to call it. Trust me, a partner gets tired with my eccentrics after a while, despite that is the very trait they liked.

I enjoy being free to do my own thing and in the relationships I've been in, it is always difficult to find any freedom. There's always plans with their friends, my schedule, her schedule, her friend's demands, my friend's never see me...so while the allure of having someone who thinks similarly or is new and exciting is great at first, it wears off after a while.

 

[epp]

there's really no point for me to write anything, as jeno has written down all my thoughs. (damn you, girl, you did it again! :steam

I've found that I don't have high standards at all, I just have very well thought about what is needed to make a relationship work for me. I know me and I know there are some things I can't compromise on. there are traits I can't cope with... and I know I literally NEED some characteristics in a man to keep me content, e.g. man's ability to rationalise, be straight-forward (but not cruel) and talk things through. there are not many points I won't compromise on, actually very few, it just happens so that these traits are not that easy to find.

I've also found that when I actually meet that kind of guy who has all those characteristics, all my boundaries come down in a second.
he's an ENTJ... an NT

 

[Kambro]

Romantic relationships are nice, at first. But usually, I'm just waiting for the novelty to wear off so we can get down to business.[/QUOTE]

Hi this is probably an old thread but could I ask what u mean by getting down to business?

 

[Kambro]

I'm just waiting for the novelty to wear off so we can get down to business.

oops sorry here's proper quote

 

[Liquid and Flammable]

Oh how right. Today in this morning I thought about that and recognized, that I have difficulties to forgive others doing "normal" things. I recognize, when others try to manipulate me (even if the others do that unconsciously), and it really turns me out.

But manipulating is a such normal thing, everyone does it. Every day. The most don't do that willingly, and so I ended my thoughts this morning, that accepting this is my personal way to find happiness in a good relationship.