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[ENTP] ENTPs and the novelty value of people

EcK

The Memes Justify the End
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Aw, I have a few mins to waste before I go out again, so here's my topic: (tada!)

I tend to always fall into these behavioral patterns when I meet someone new and truly geniunely like them I will nontheless end up calling them less and less to the point I basically forget to call them back like, ever. I also never seem to miss people. So I do realise it gives me a competitive advantage in terms of not being the average needy guy but that's not what i'm trying to say here.

My point is, I guess, that I still like them, it's just that apparently my liking of people isn't what stimulates me into talking/sharing with them.

And even my oldest friends, whom i absolutly adore deep within generally sort of bore me as it always falls back into the same patterns.

For example my bestest friend's and my main activity together is to fucking walk the dogs for 2 hours while discussing stuff, we never party together, we have totally different circles of friends and acquaintances and we don't do each others birthday parties. Yet we both agree that we're each other's best friends.

I'm thinking about changing that for the sake of remodeling myself not sure in which way i'll go though: I can either just, accept that as my nature and accelerate the process or look for new kinds of interactions and ways to get to know people.

I'll probably try both ways and compartimentalize as it's what i do best.

what about other entps ? Do you guys recognize your own "quests for human bonding" in there ?
 

EcK

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seriously, that's just cold!
 
P

Phantonym

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I tend to always fall into these behavioral patterns when I meet someone new and truly geniunely like them I will nontheless end up calling them less and less to the point I basically forget to call them back like, ever. I also never seem to miss people. So I do realise it gives me a competitive advantage in terms of not being the average needy guy but that's not what i'm trying to say here.

My point is, I guess, that I still like them, it's just that apparently my liking of people isn't what stimulates me into talking/sharing with them.

And even my oldest friends, whom i absolutly adore deep within generally sort of bore me as it always falls back into the same patterns.

:blink: I'm not an ENTP and I have exactly the same "problem". So, I guess you can't claim exclusivity on this one.
 

EcK

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I just thought it was an interesting issue / opener as far as social animals' motivations for behaviors are concerned. Why do I always have to spell these things out for people

:blink: I'm not an ENTP and I have exactly the same "problem". So, I guess you can't claim exclusivity on this one.
try me! :devil:
 

sade

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:blink: I'm not an ENTP and I have exactly the same "problem". So, I guess you can't claim exclusivity on this one.
Ahem, me too.
I try to change it now and then, but I'm not so confident in iniating new things so it takes a looooong while. There's that pesky insecurity that comes lurking from the background.
Other times I'm simply completely content at being on my own that it doesn't even cross my mind to contact people/ask them out/try something new. :doh:
Then again with me this has nothing to do with novelty or getting bored (assuming that from the title), it's just wishing to deepen the friendship.
 
P

Phantonym

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Then again with me this has nothing to do with novelty or getting bored (assuming that from the title), it's just wishing to deepen the friendship.

That's true with me as well. It's like yeah, I've seen this side of you already, now what else you have there? Sort of like trying to peel the layers off people to get connected with them on a more deeper level.
 

paperoceans

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Meh, I just accept it for what it is. I often warn people that I'm neglectful... I don't purposely do it. But sometimes things get so boring. The same people, the same shit. It's tiring. It's probably because we as ENTPs need to find friends who are basically... daredevils. Always doing something new and exciting. I think we can all agree that we hate the routine of things.

I've only had one friend who had me guessing all the time... But she was bipolar and a bit crazy. She tried to push some chick off a cliff.

Yea, best to just be neglectful.
 
R

Riva

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You are obviously too lazy to pick up the phone and call your friends.
That is all to it!
No philosophies behind it.

And one more thing -
Dumb NTs and NFs try to put everything into theories. I think thats why Ns think too much.
 

EcK

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mmh nah, i don't agree. (to curzon)
 

jenocyde

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I tend to always fall into these behavioral patterns when I meet someone new and truly geniunely like them I will nontheless end up calling them less and less to the point I basically forget to call them back like, ever. I also never seem to miss people. So I do realise it gives me a competitive advantage in terms of not being the average needy guy but that's not what i'm trying to say here.

Yeah, sounds really familiar. It's not so much that I bore of the people I know, it's more that I get distracted because I am busy meeting more new people.
 
R

Riva

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hmm...

And hasn't it ever occurred to you that you must be a bit on the lazy side of town?
 

LEVINA

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I have a extreme tendency to become a random person's BFFL! and then two weeks after never talk to them again even though I still consider them a friend. This also happens with groups, communities, ect... Many of the people I've done this too still consider me a friend (Even if our "friendship" was 2 years ago and only lasted for a month)

I also wonder, my friends are split into catagories. One of my best friend is my idea/advice/talk buddy. I would try to convince her to go along with my schemes, but of course, that never works.
And then I have a basic talk buddy where our conversation can go on for 5 hours a day. Then my other best friend is my scheme buddy, together we are a "causing chaos and laughter" team. :devil:
That pattern of yours, I agree with. I usually interact with these "friends" for a month or so, before we drift apart. I become involved with a new scene or new people, and then one day we strike it up again and we're back to it. I only consider these guys my "best" friends because I'm able to keep the cycle going the longest(and the cycle itself never gets boring!)

Meh, I just accept it for what it is. I often warn people that I'm neglectful... I don't purposely do it. But sometimes things get so boring. The same people, the same shit. It's tiring. It's probably because we as ENTPs need to find friends who are basically... daredevils. Always doing something new and exciting. I think we can all agree that we hate the routine of things.

Dude, get outta my head.



I don't really mind this cycle, I get to be around new "things" and new adventures all the time. Of course, many times I am unaware of the effect on the other person. Maybe that's why I wonder why suddenly they don't talk to me often/only a faint wave of "hello" at school.

I've always been sort of a one person stand.
 

Synthetic Darkness

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I can never hold attachments to people at all, I've always thought it was because I moved around a lot as a child and so I adapted at making new friends and not getting emotionally attached to them so I can leave them without missing them. But I haven't moved in a while and I still have this emotional detachment, I have several friends in my high school all from different cliques and different grades now its weird to see me being "best" friends with someone longer than 2 months, I get too bored and befriend someone else.

People are only interesting when they are useful when they outlive their usefulness I get bored, and when I get bored its "bye-bye" =)
 

neptunesnet

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Ahem, me too.
I try to change it now and then, but I'm not so confident in iniating new things so it takes a looooong while. There's that pesky insecurity that comes lurking from the background.
Other times I'm simply completely content at being on my own that it doesn't even cross my mind to contact people/ask them out/try something new. :doh:
Then again with me this has nothing to do with novelty or getting bored (assuming that from the title), it's just wishing to deepen the friendship.

This.
Deepening a friendship takes time and energy and (the big one) selflessness. I'm not always all of those things at once :(.
Insecurity plays a big part of it with me: not wanting anyone to know too much about me, not wanting to turn someone off because I'm too sentimental, etc. But, like sade said, I forget! :huh: about contacting friends and making arrangements. Well, I forget in the sense that I always think of them, but it never occurs to me to actually call them up and do something haha. I'm so happy in la la land that anything outside of that is shifted to number two on the priority list. Pronto.
 
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