[MBTI General] Defining people as 'Locks', Insulting?

[therationaledge]

I once told my girlfriend that I saw getting the truth or information out of people like opening a lock

Kind the right key, and apply the right amount of pressure, and whula!

She kinda got insulted, saying I shouldn't view people as locks to open.

Is what I did actually offensive? (I have my own opnion but am interested in what you all think)

 

[INTP]

lol. Shes either overly sensitive or she has something against locks.

 

[therationaledge]

lol. Shes either overly sensitive or she has something against locks.

Or John Locke.

Or Lost

Or Knives

Or Killing Boars

Or Swine flu lol


No its more the fact that i do not view humans in a romanticized/idealised way at all.

Im the guy who said "My love for you is a wave of seratonin washing over my brain until it is later replaced by oxytocin, (other wise my brain would melt,) and after that I will be totally and completelly physiccally addicted to you!.........I LOVE YOU!"

Yeah...thats me.

EDIT: My gf is ISFJ, i think, and my ENFP friend also got irked with me.

 

[veins]

Perhaps she thought you were objectifying people. Supposing there's a person in question who doesn't wish to reveal any information, lest it be too personal or such, then the phrasing can come across in the wrong light, in the sense that you might care less about the person than the piece of information.

 

[Amargith]

Grin, I can see her point.
You basically just told that you view people as an obstacle that you enjoy getting past and that it's not the person that counts, but the information.

I take it she an..NF? To us, it's people that matter, and it's disrespectful to ignore the person and give priority to something over someone. You'll have to explain her that even if your interest lies in the information peope contain, you will be treating the lock like a beautiful antique in the process as you value what it contains dearly, as well as its beauty

Also, most likely...it subconsciously made her feel like a means to an end to you. You're supposed to love her for who she is..not for the services/information she can provide. It's unnerving to think that your boyfriend might consider you as such, even if you *know* in your heart that you are most likely an exception

 

[therationaledge]

Perhaps she thought you were objectifying people. Supposing there's a person in question who doesn't wish to reveal any information, lest it be too personal or such, then the phrasing can come across in the wrong light, in the sense that you might care less about the person than the piece of information.

Probably. Sometimes I DO view information as more important than someones feelings, depending on the situation.

Im sure everyone could think of a real life situation like that.

(Plus everyone seems to be on this shtick that i think im superior to everyone, which is stupid. I am highly flawed and would absorb many of the charistics of my friends if I could. I think its just a pile of things like this probably)

EDIT: ANd its hard to put it romantically lol when in the pat ive also said "sometimes its like mining for gold with a pickaxe"

Hard to make that sound pretty, though to be honest I have also been able to bring alot of people to the point where they can admit the past and move on...stuff like that

 

[wank]

lol, blatant objectification gets to a lot people,...
Something about conflict aversion(blunt is bad?), not being willing to simplify others due to subconsciously recognizing others as projections, and an ego unwilling to part with the fascination of itself.

Expectation leads to disappointment. She did this to herself, you were a catalyst, hehe.

 

[01011010]

No. I don't see anything wrong with that statement.

 

[Totenkindly]

I once told my girlfriend that I saw getting the truth or information out of people like opening a lock

Kind the right key, and apply the right amount of pressure, and whula!

She kinda got insulted, saying I shouldn't view people as locks to open.

Is what I did actually offensive? (I have my own opnion but am interested in what you all think)

You goof.
You actually SAID this to someone out loud?
Especially someone you were in an LTR with?

Many people hate that.
They feel they're reduced to objects in your view.

I got burned badly any time I made a comment in similar style to anyone, so I quickly learned it wasn't worth it unless I knew they could handle it.

 

[veins]

Probably. Sometimes I DO view information as more important than someones feelings, depending on the situation.

Im sure everyone could think of a real life situation like that.

(Plus everyone seems to be on this shtick that i think im superior to everyone, which is stupid. I am highly flawed and would absorb many of the charistics of my friends if I could. I think its just a pile of things like this probably)

EDIT: ANd its hard to put it romantically lol when in the pat ive also said "sometimes its like mining for gold with a pickaxe"

Hard to make that sound pretty, though to be honest I have also been able to bring alot of people to the point where they can admit the past and move on...stuff like that

I can see where you're coming from. If there's someone whom you hardly know at all, then that person's feeling will weigh less than the information which you will hold in higher regard if it's information that you're seeking. Given the situation, like you mentioned. I didn't answer the question to this thread yet, which is, I don't find what you said to be offensive. It's just an analogy, comparing the extraction of information to opening a lock. Although, I can see how your girlfriend can construe it to be an offensive comment, as mentioned before.

 

[BlueScreen]

I once told my girlfriend that I saw getting the truth or information out of people like opening a lock

Find the right key, and apply the right amount of pressure, and whula

I just thought of the end of "men in tights" for some reason .

 

[wolfy]

I don't see much wrong with saying that. When you got called to task for it you could have dressed it up a bit. "We all have our own unique combination lock..."

 

[therationaledge]

I don't see much wrong with saying that. When you got called to task for it you could have dressed it up a bit. "We all have our own unique combination lock..."

Lol I dont dress up almost anyting. I think of most of it as stupid human ritual, not that I still dont do it.

 

[Kra]

You goof.
You actually SAID this to someone out loud?
Especially someone you were in an LTR with?

Many people hate that.
They feel they're reduced to objects in your view.

I got burned badly any time I made a comment in similar style to anyone, so I quickly learned it wasn't worth it unless I knew they could handle it.

It is definitely better to not mention these things. Besides, locks are easier to pick if you don't announce to the world that is what you are trying to do.

 

[jenocyde]

I got burned badly any time I made a comment in similar style to anyone, so I quickly learned it wasn't worth it unless I knew they could handle it.

It is definitely better to not mention these things.

It gets very tiring to pretend all the time, though. If you can't express your true thoughts to your LTR partner, then what can you express? What is the point, then? Blah.

 

[therationaledge]

It gets very tiring to pretend all the time, though. If you can't express your true thoughts to your LTR partner, then what can you express? What is the point, then? Blah.

Thats why I do express them to her, it is actually one of the roughest things about the relationship...the HONESTY!
And I dont cheat on her or anything like that either.
I could have lied to her so many times and smoothed things very nicely, but didnt for sake of my belief in being honest with a LTR.

Shes learning to deal with me....kinda.

 

[garbage]

You're asking this question in the NT forum?

 

[proteanmix]

This isn't making sense to me.

What was the context of the conversation? This seems like a pretty straightforward metaphor, even to the point where people say "you have the KEY to my heart."

If these are two decently reasonable people then why would they be insulted unless there's something else that went on to make them react like this.

 

[Little Linguist]

I once told my girlfriend that I saw getting the truth or information out of people like opening a lock

Kind the right key, and apply the right amount of pressure, and whula!

She kinda got insulted, saying I shouldn't view people as locks to open.

Is what I did actually offensive? (I have my own opnion but am interested in what you all think)

Nah, it's just the truth. And people don't like to hear the truth, but that's cool. Better for the rest of us.

 

[sculpting]

I think it is an interesting view point. I talk about people as puzzles, waves that consructively or destructively interfere or even use math analogies. I guess it might be considered offensive as you remove the individuality of the person when you use analogies as such and treat them as an object.

However the beauty is that, while they may be a repeating pattern, it is all the minute details inside the pattern that give variety and spice to the mix.