[NT] How to get a good conversation from a non-NT?

[Honu26]

I'm in a work situation where I am living and working with the same 12 people for the next 6 weeks, and we will not have anyone else to interact with, except virtually, during this time. Pretty extreme, I know. My problem is that I'm having difficulties to getting a "good", intellectually satisfying conversation from most of my co-workers. Everytime I throw something out that most NTs would be all over for at least an hour, the topic drops to the ground in about 2 minutes at most. The other challenge is that we're not allowed to talk about work at the dining able, so I can't ask about the work that they are doing.

Does anyone have any suggestions on starting good conversations with non- NT?

 

[Willfrey]

Well throw politics and religion out the door, every time I've started a discussion on either it turns up badly.

 

[amelie]

What are some topics that will keep NT's going for at least an hour? Non-NT inquiring minds want to know...

For NF's (at least my circle), conversations about people and their behavior, philosophy, pop-culture, news (avoid politics), technology, literature, etc. are good openers, but of course it varies widely by the person you are taking to.

 

[Magic Poriferan]

Half, if not most of my good conversations have been with non-NTs.

The most commons initations of such conversations are:

I ambush my acquaintance with some bizarre trivia or philosophical proposition.

I show them a study or new report I found interesting, make a comment or two, ask for their thoughts.

Or the old stand-by, I tell them about an unusual or important thing that happened to me (that one usually works well on the other person).

That being said, I've also been happy with a lot of my conversations when they've been started by other, non-NT people. So I can let them come to me.

EDIT: And to Willfrey: It's basically a social rule of thumb, that unless with intimates or a group specifically convened for such discussion, do not bring up religion or politics.

 

[Honu26]

What are some topics that will keep NT's going for at least an hour? Non-NT inquiring minds want to know...

For NF's (at least my circle), conversations about people and their behavior, philosophy, pop-culture, news (avoid politics), technology, literature, etc. are good openers, but of course it varies widely by the person you are taking to.

My most recent example at lunch today is closer to the topics you listed. We were talking about a long distance relationship that one of coworkers, not present, has with his now fiancee. In that conversation I wondered whether how many long distance relationships nowadays would last if we had to depend just on snail mail or phone to maintain it (like 10-20+ years ago) instead of VOI or IM, email, blogging, etc. That dropped pretty quickly.

(What I really wanted to talk about- but held back- are the local tree and flower varieties and what the native species still exist in the area. )

 

[Honu26]

Half, if not most of my good conversations have been with non-NTs.

The most commons initations of such conversations are:

-----

That being said, I've also been happy with a lot of my conversations when they've been started by other, non-NT people. So I can let them come to me.


Thanks. I'll have to try some of these with these particular people. Mostly, I've been doing a lot of listening, and trying to ask some questions to turn the conversation into something that would be interesting to me intellectually (or at least amusing or worth my time).

 

[Jeffster]

SP - sports, music, movies, outdoors stuff, cars

SJ - stock market, business, history, their families

NF - If you were a fruit, which one would you be?

 

[murkrow]

IF they were a fruit?

This is NFs we're talkin' about, J-bone!

 

[Fidelia]

Haha, that's about right Jeffster!

 

[poppy]

I find I can have a pretty good conversation with other types if I've gotten to know them. Is it possible for you to speak to the others one-on-one? In a large group of people of different temperaments, it's pretty easy to get bowled over if you try to bring up something, especially things of a specific and scientific nature. If you're familiar with some of them, it's easier to bring up things you have in common, and you might discover something that satisfies your need for good, quality information beyond gossip and general blather.

If all else fails, just think about them as moderately interesting human specimens and study their habits and behaviors. While they're droning on about Grey's Anatomy you can try to guess what sort of family lives they have, what their darkest thoughts are, and what crimes they would commit if pushed to the limit. You know, like a game.

IF they were a fruit?

Lol.