[MBTI General] Holiday Apathy

[avolkiteshvara]

Fuck holidays.

 

[dotdalidot]

Holidays are just so meh. Why do we have to force fun and happiness and getting along type thing on just one specified day? I guess I just don't like the 'forced' aspect of it.

I like days where it feels like a holiday but it isn't a holiday.

 

[garbage]

Halloween gives me an excuse to make a cumbersome, intricate costume and dance around like an idiot

It can stay

 

[BlackCat]

Holidays are probably one of the least important things to me. Halloween is fun and all because you can dress up, but they just aren't a huge deal for me. My ENFJ mom goes totally insane over holidays, redecorates the whole house for each holiday etc. Ugh.

 

[sunset5678]

I totally agree, sometimes too much planning can turn anything into a
nightmare. I didn't want to be left out of anything but when I was yo-
unger I would pretend to be invisible if any drama went on...one Christ-
mas my grandparents were bickering about whether to cook a ham or
stick a pizza made from a kit in the oven, my brother and I were camping
out in the living room, we were pretending we were asleep but we'd sit
up and roll our eyes with a hint of a smirk on our faces and the rest of
the time people were flying off the handle about routines and things be-
ing done their way or the highway. Let's just say a couple phone calls
had to be made to apologize for misunderstandings...even though you
could tell the misunderstandings were intentional because of territory
and all that crap. We basically sat there like the South Park kids when
they say "Dude!" and get that weirded out look on their faces.

 

[Synarch]

Maybe its just part of growing older... maybe my parents faked their asses off too. Maybe its the INT selfishness that bogs me down.

Nah. You're just overthinking it. Just try to have fun with your kids and plan things you think they might enjoy without adding pressure to HAVE TO HAVE FUN.

Maybe I am wrong but to me it looks like that all over developed world holidays are losing on their imporatnce.

Btw. I am not holiday person.

Oh, a person named Antisocial One hating holidays!

What are holidays? Occasions to get together with your loved ones where everyone can be together. If you do not like this, or do not value the sublime and special boringness of history and tradition, you might not like it.

I hated the holidays when I was growing up. My mother got so stressed out and it made them a nightmare. When I had children of my own I was determined not to let anyone suck the fun out of holidays for them. I created a lot of our own traditions. For example - no formal type meals on Christmas. If we feel like fried chicken, that's what we have. Spend the whole day in pajamas and watch A Christmas Story. I still hide Easter eggs and they still color them even though my two are grown and nearly grown. You take what you like from tradition and toss the rest.

That sounds pretty awesome and I totally agree.

Being an ESFJ, holidays HAVE to be special (esp xmas and birthdays). Every occasion, i am left disappointed. I believe my expectations are just to high and i major suck. Being with an INTJ during these holidays sucked even more as he didn't seem to be enjoying himself (other than cooking the food), looked miserable most of the time and just generally treated it as another day.

INTJ's have a hard time having fun. It's like pulling teeth.

Fuck holidays.

Stop being so predictable. At least explain why YOU hate them.

Halloween gives me an excuse to make a cumbersome, intricate costume and dance around like an idiot

It can stay

Halloween is pretty sweet. +1

 

[onemoretime]

I hate holidays. just one more thing to fucking remember...

Totally know where you're coming from. Especially the whole "OK, so who do I have to get a present for this year, and who do I need to send cards to"... aggravating as hell.

Birthdays are pretty bad too, but more in the sense of "damn, do I really have to get them a present? I had other things I wanted to do with that money, you know"

That being said, buying a present for a friend with no reason attached to it is something I excel at.

 

[jenocyde]

That being said, buying a present for a friend with no reason attached to it is something I excel at.

I live for that, too.

 

[Blank]

Yeah, I think life would be hella sweeter if people just randomly gave other people presents. It's like Christmas every time it happens but without the disappointment high expectations will bring.

 

[onemoretime]

I live for that, too.

"Why'd you get this?" "I saw it and thought of you, figured you'd like it a lot"

We care, guys, we really do!

 

[Synarch]

You holiday hating folks are wet blankets. Holidays, like much in life, are what you make them.

I love the holidays. It is up to every person to find something special in it and to make it special for other people. Even if just by expressing your love in a simple manner or just by making a point to spend time together without fucking off on a laptop or channel surfing.

When I think of Christmas, for example, I think of the way my parents got really excited about seeing us open presents and how hard they tried to make things special even when money was tight. How we would spin our special, cheesy Christmas records (like Willie Nelson's "Pretty Paper") on the stereo with the lights of the Christmas tree setting everything in the livingroom aglow.

My brother and I would help my Mom make hot spiced cider and we would all sit around and talk about special memories and joke around with each other while wrapping gifts for others. I also remember how nice it felt to come home when it was already dark and seeing the Winter stars twinkling above our home in the clear night sky; the roof strung with lights and glowing with warmth from the inside.

 

[kelric]

You holiday hating folks are wet blankets. Holidays, like much in life, are what you make them.

I love the holidays. It is up to every person to find something special in it and to make it special for other people. Even if just by expressing your love in a simple manner or just by making a point to spend time together without fucking off on a laptop or channel surfing.

It sounds like you've got a lot of good holiday memories, and I can see why that would give you an appreciation for them - but that's not always the case for everyone. In some cases, they really are a source of stress, pain, and endless frustration - when those problems generally don't occur on non-holidays. I like doing nice things for people, visiting, etc. - but I enjoy all of this much *less* on holidays. There's too much stress, forced gaiety, too many doomed-to-fail expectations, and too many no-win choices involved (spend holiday with family member A or family member B?) for me to get much enjoyment out of them. A "random" get-together is almost always more enjoyable for me (even with me being pretty antisocial ).

 

[jenocyde]

That sounds lovely, Syn.

Of course, not all of us had those kinds of experiences. But yours really sound nice.

For the most part, I enjoy having time set aside for family or vacations, but I don't like the pretense of it being about religion or memorials when no one seems to care about the meaning. For instance, Memorial Day means a lot to me since I have a lot of military in my family, but for others it's just an excuse to barbeque, you know what I mean? Christmas and Valentine's are the worst offenders in my book - the contrived gift giving irritates me. But, to each his own...

 

[Synarch]

It sounds like you've got a lot of good holiday memories, and I can see why that would give you an appreciation for them - but that's not always the case for everyone. In some cases, they really are a source of stress, pain, and endless frustration - when those problems generally don't occur on non-holidays. I like doing nice things for people, visiting, etc. - but I enjoy all of this much *less* on holidays. There's too much stress, forced gaiety, too many doomed-to-fail expectations, and too many no-win choices involved (spend holiday with family member A or family member B?) for me to get much enjoyment out of them. A "random" get-together is almost always more enjoyable for me (even with me being pretty antisocial ).

Sure, but that's my point, as well. It is up to you to make it special. Maybe it can't be that way with everyone you care about, but we can make a difference even in trying to help not set expectations too high. It's more about recognizing what is important.

If nothing else, you could take someone out to dinner who doesn't have family.

That sounds lovely, Syn.

Of course, not all of us had those kinds of experiences. But yours really sound nice.

For the most part, I enjoy having time set aside for family or vacations, but I don't like the pretense of it being about religion or memorials when no one seems to care about the meaning. For instance, Memorial Day means a lot to me since I have a lot of military in my family, but for others it's just an excuse to barbeque, you know what I mean? Christmas and Valentine's are the worst offenders in my book - the contrived gift giving irritates me. But, to each his own...

Why should it matter how other people spend their holidays? Most other people are worthless, stupid sacks of shit.

If you care about the meaning, then it has meaning. If you don't, then it doesn't. The main problem is that we no longer, as a culture, seem to value very much. We are completely atomized and disassociated as a culture. Mass media and the loosening of family ties due to widespread movement across large distances have created a papier mache culture held together with bullshit bumper sticker truisms and empty materialism.

 

[avolkiteshvara]

My hate stems partly from NT-ness and partly from bad experiences growing up.

It just seems meaningless to go through the same mindless motions celebrating the same thing to which you really have no attachment to. EarthDay means more to me than Christmas.

I respect those going to church on Christmas(even though Jesus wasn't born in Dec) much more than I do everyone else casually celebrating the holiday.


Syn just likes the holidays cause it give him a chance to whip out that big fat cock of his and show off.

 

[Synarch]

Syn just likes the holidays cause it give him a chance to whip out that big cock of his and show off.

You like to talk about my penis and about sex with regard to me in general, I've noticed. I get it. You like me.

 

[avolkiteshvara]

You like to talk about my penis and about sex with regard to me in general, I've noticed. I get it. You like me.

You should have PMed me that.

 

[onemoretime]

Why should it matter how other people spend their holidays? Most other people are worthless, stupid sacks of shit.

If you care about the meaning, then it has meaning. If you don't, then it doesn't. The main problem is that we no longer, as a culture, seem to value very much. We are completely atomized and disassociated as a culture. Mass media and the loosening of family ties due to widespread movement across large distances have created a papier mache culture held together with bullshit bumper sticker truisms and empty materialism.

What's the point of making culturally-sanctioned days special then, if this is your viewpoint? Why not make that every day?

 

[Galusha]

My hate stems partly from NT-ness and partly from bad experiences growing up.

It just seems meaningless to go through the same mindless motions celebrating the same thing to which you really have no attachment to. EarthDay means more to me than Christmas.

I respect those going to church on Christmas(even though Jesus wasn't born in Dec) much more than I do everyone else casually celebrating the holiday.

it's not the NT-ness. I spent the fourth on my roof, watching my ghetto neighbors put off bigger fireworks than most small towns, and yelling at passers-by. and it was fantastic. and if the purpose of the day is special to me, I don't need everyone to celebrate it together and validate my beliefs. holidays are just a time to relax, an excuse to be happy together despite whatever terrible things are going on the next day.

basically, I pity people who go to church every christmas because they're sometimes bound to a tradition out of obligation when they could just be enjoying themselves with the occasional moment of reflection. the celebration itself should encourage thoughts of the cause, not require them.

 

[Kasper]

If a public holiday is more stressful than work then you're doing it wrong.

Screw traditions do what's fun for you and yours, if you enjoy what you do then any effort you put in shouldn’t feel like a chore. If spending time with your family sucks, don't.

You holiday hating folks are wet blankets. Holidays, like much in life, are what you make them.

Amen!