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[NT] INT Depression oddity?

Gewitter27

New member
Joined
Jun 19, 2009
Messages
651
MBTI Type
INTP
Enneagram
5w4
I'm new here, so may I jsut say that I'm currently in high school and I am suffering from MDD. I've been going through an episode since late March.

People don't understand me very well, I beleive. For instance, If I was to say my self esteem level in an inequality, it would look like this.

SELF-IMAGE < STEAMING PILE OF SH*T

Obviously I'm quite down on myself. So here's the point: People have come to me, and, in all good faith, accused me of being a narcissist.:shock:

In what I know, Narcissists absolutely love themselves. They are so full of themselves that they beleive themself better than all others and that others should be glad to be in their prescence.

They are defining me as an antonym of what I really am.:doh:

So here is the big question:

Dos the fact that I'm an INT have something to do with being so thouroughly misunderstood? Does INT have anything to do with people mistaking a metaphorical cholera bacteria with a blue whale?

I'm totally weirded out by this. It is quite frightening and I'm wondering if it has to do with INTness or probably a neurotic psychosis.

Comment, discuss, etc.
 

MonkeyGrass

New member
Joined
Jun 13, 2009
Messages
877
MBTI Type
infj
Enneagram
7
How're your people skills? Communication skills?

These can definitely contribute to others misunderstanding you...the (well-loved) INTs in my life really struggled through high school, because they tended towards being intelligent loners, which other people interpreted as arrogance. It was a tough time for them.

Do you think your depression is situational? If the situation were different, and you could change the way others understood you, do you think you'd feel differently?
 

Gewitter27

New member
Joined
Jun 19, 2009
Messages
651
MBTI Type
INTP
Enneagram
5w4
I'm noted for having terrible people and 'communication skills'.

'Communication skills' being terrible is based on the idea that 'communication skills' rely on talking and listening. Ask me to do either, and I'll to it well. I have a hard time figuring out what to say or how to say it when I need to do both.

If others viewed me differently, it wouldn't matter. *Points angrily to Fe and 4 wing*

If they had in the past, it would have for sure. But the past is all well and gone and nobody is willing to accept new ideas. My HS is 75% ESFJ.
 

velocity

New member
Joined
Oct 22, 2008
Messages
477
MBTI Type
epic
make sure that the people accusing you of narcissism a) actually know what it means and b) aren't just insecure f*tards.
 

Alwar

The Architect
Joined
Jun 19, 2009
Messages
922
MBTI Type
INTP
How many more years of high school do you have? I had a huge problem with faculty in GS/HS but things reversed when I got out.
 

Gewitter27

New member
Joined
Jun 19, 2009
Messages
651
MBTI Type
INTP
Enneagram
5w4
I'm going into sophmore year, so I have to deal with that, junior, and senior year.
 

JocktheMotie

Habitual Fi LineStepper
Joined
Nov 20, 2008
Messages
8,491
Apparently there is a disconnect between your self image and the image other people see. To me this indicates that you need to apply some critical thinking and determine why there is a difference in perception. Your MDD diagnosis also poses certain problems, as it may be difficult for you to separate yourself from their effects, not to mention if you typed yourself when you had the disorder, you may be mistyped.

Also, perhaps you feel misunderstood because of that disconnect, and when steps are taken to properly align your image in regards to yourself and others, it may fade. However, try not to take much, or any, worth in actually being "understood." Complaining of being misunderstood is typically used as an excuse, and you'd be better off abandoning that need.
 

Totenkindly

@.~*virinaĉo*~.@
Joined
Apr 19, 2007
Messages
50,145
MBTI Type
BELF
Enneagram
594
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
I went through major depressions all my life (esp in high school) although I was never diagnosed until adulthood. I lived in a pretty Sensor world and had few N friends (there just were not any around).

Note that people in general (and then especially Sensors) will key off the tangible aspects of your personality. They do not realize or consider you to be whatever than what you show them. So I totally believe you when you say you are not narcissistic; I just think your probable tendency towards self-absorption (because you feel alienated, you introspect by default, and your external expressed lack of complex social skills) leads them to see you as more narcissistic, which certainly doesn't help with the alienation issue.

I think mental illness involves (1) some type of break from reality and (2) one's own distorted sense of self and self-worth. How clear do you feel your vision is, do you find yourself "fair" to others, and what do you feel about your personal motivations towards others?

Basically, a healthy person can perceive and do what is best long-term for their own and others' psychological growth, even if they take some amount of flak for doing it. (Put another way -- healthy self-boundaries and self-security that lets one interact with others without manipulating them for some reason.)

You sound cogent. Your INT nature is definitely going to create issues for you; you just will not be well-understood and so you'll get even more social pressure, and you know you're already weak in that area.... so expect some stress.

As far as a psychological illness, only a therapist/trained professional who spends time with you can help you figure that out. You don't sound crazy, though; you do sound like you are looking at yourself and can even assess that your own self-worth sucks. You're definitely self-aware, which is one aspect of mental health; usually screwed up people cannot see themselves clearly, they are in denial of reality of some sort. You also don't seem to be avoiding the issue of your own flaws. ("Neurosis is an attempt to avoid legitimate suffering.") If anything, you are probably far too hard on yourself and will have to learn to believe in yourself even when others are hard on you.
 

ajblaise

Minister of Propagandhi
Joined
Aug 3, 2008
Messages
7,914
MBTI Type
INTP
An INT only becomes free when they learn which people's opinions to ignore.
 

Gewitter27

New member
Joined
Jun 19, 2009
Messages
651
MBTI Type
INTP
Enneagram
5w4
I knew I was an INTP long before this arose.

1. I think my vision is only poor, like fogged up glasses.
2. Others find me very fair, almost to a fault. I value fairness greatly, I complain immensely when things are unfair.
3. My personal motivations for others are simply to have little contact with them, and when that dows occur, try to figure out what they want and think of what to do about it.
 

CJ99

Is Willard in Footloose!!
Joined
Jan 5, 2009
Messages
582
MBTI Type
ENTP
I always found it was easiest just to be myself as much as possible ie a bit odd to maost people and to be friendly to everyone that way anyone who isn't bothered by oddness will become ur friend.
 

Alwar

The Architect
Joined
Jun 19, 2009
Messages
922
MBTI Type
INTP
Check your state laws to see if you can get a GED and go straight into Jr. College. I wish I would have done it.
 

INTJ123

HAHHAHHAH!
Joined
Jun 20, 2009
Messages
777
MBTI Type
ESFP
That sounds about right, highschool was when I got my first taste of philosophy and depression came shortly afterwards lol.
 
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